Read Beautifully Shattered (The Beautifully Series Book 1) Online
Authors: Courtney Kristel
While the tub fills, I
inspect the bathroom. I’m not surprised that all of my things are
in here. All of my face wash and soaps are in the shower already,
along with a loofah. I open the top drawer and I discover that he
even bought me a new razor, and my favorite brand of tampons. What I
wouldn’t give to see Kohen buy these. He wasn’t joking when he
said he wants to make this a monthly thing. I open the last drawer
and I spot a new hair dryer, straightener, and a curling iron. If he
keeps this up, I won’t even need to pack next time.
Once my hands are
shriveled up like a prune, I force myself to climb out. Not gonna
lie, it takes a good amount of effort on my part. I’m pretty sure I
could live in this tub. After drying off, I step out of the bathroom
to search for my bag and stop in the doorway. Kohen laid out clothes
for me on the bed. For some reason I don’t find this sweet. Even
though they’re the clothes I packed, I feel like it’s his way of
trying to tell me what I can wear. Which is stupid since I was going
to select that exact pair of leggings and sweater. I’m being
irrational.
I force myself to let
it go. Kohen is just being thoughtful like he was when he bought me
all the bath stuff. I quickly get dressed. I ignore the irritation
bubbling inside me when I realize that he touched my underwear. Once
I’m decent, I brush my hair. As I’m leaving the bedroom, my phone
chimes with a new text message.
I curse at myself when I pick it up.
It’s practically dead. I should have let it charge this morning
while I was getting ready. Whatever, I’m not going to need my phone
anyways. Pressing the unlock button, I read Harper’s text.
Tinkerbell:
Hey I went by your place today to see how you’re
doing, but you’re not there. Let me know when you come home and
I’ll bring over ice-cream and wine :)
I start texting her
back so I can tell her that I won’t be back till Sunday, but of
course I can’t because my phone dies. I search all over the room
for the bag with the charger, but I can’t locate it. Opening the
closet, I discover my bag on the floor. I unzip it to find that it’s
empty. Kohen’s unpacked everything. Maybe he plugged in my charger
for me. I search every outlet. No charger.
As I’m coming down
the stairs I remember that Kohen mentioned texting Harper and my
brother, informing them we went away for the weekend. So then why did
she ask where I was? His messages might not have went through, the
service out here might be spotty. A little part of me doesn’t
believe that, though.
“Hey, do you know
where my charger is?” I ask Kohen when I reach the kitchen. He’s
dressed in low-hung jeans and nothing else. I’m not ashamed that it
takes me awhile to raise my gaze from his abs to his face.
“No, sorry, babe. I
didn’t see it. That’s why I unpacked everything for you, I saw
that your phone was dying so I was looking for your charger.” He
shrugs then continues chopping on the cutting board.
“So you didn’t see
my charger?” I ask again because I know I packed it. It was the
last thing I put in my bag before I zipped it. I remember because the
cord got in my way.
Kohen turns around with
a smile. “Nope, that’s usually what I mean when I say I didn’t
see it.” He walks over to the cupboard for plates.
“Okay . . . where’s
your charger?” I ask.
“I forgot it,” he
says with a shrug.
“You didn’t bring
your charger?” I ask, dumbfounded.
Kohen is always the
responsible one. Why wouldn’t he pack his charger? But I don’t
understand why he would lie to me, either. Something isn’t right.
“I just said I
didn’t,” he snaps.
I decide to drop the
charger thing. It’s not that big a deal. It’s definitely not
worth arguing about and setting him off before our weekend even
starts. I’m so over fighting. Fighting with Jax, and the war with
myself wondering if I should be here or not, is exhausting.
“Did the text go
through to Logan and Harper, though?” I ask with forced lightness
in my voice.
“It should have.
Why?”
“Just wondering. I
got a text from her before my phone died, asking where I was.” It’s
my turn to shrug.
Kohen turns around with
the same smile on his face, but it seems forced. Weird. “You can
use my phone if you want to check that they got it.”
I’m tempted to take
him up on the offer, but I feel like it’s a trap. To see if I trust
him enough. I decide to let it go. I can always use his phone
tomorrow to call Logan and ask how his flight was. Yeah, I’ll do
that. It’s not like I can call him now since he’s on a plane and
I can’t call Harper since I don’t have her number memorized.
Something that I’m going to have to do in the future in case this
happens again.
I wave off his
suggestion. “No, it’s fine. I’ll check in with Logan tomorrow.”
Kohen nods and carries
our plates outside. I grab the glasses of wine that he’s already
filled. I take a sip while I follow him. Walking up to him, I kiss
him on his cheek for his thoughtfulness. He managed to pick up my
favorite wine and prepare one of my favorite meals. Pesto pasta with
roasted tomatoes. Yum.
“It’s perfect,” I
tell him as I sit down.
“You’re perfect.”
He captures my hand and kisses my palm.
I don’t even bother
to correct him as it will just cause a fight between us. Like it
usually does whenever he calls me perfect. I’m so far from perfect,
it’s laughable.
I curl up closer into
the warm arms around me. They squeeze me tighter. I’m afraid that
I’m dreaming so I keep my eyes firmly shut. I’m in Jax’s arms
again. I don’t care about the repercussions of being here with him.
If I’m dreaming, I never want to wake up. I want to forget about
the secrets and be happy in the arms of the man I love. Eyes still
tightly closed, I turn around so that I can snuggle into his chest.
Inhaling deeply I feel like I’m home.
“Are you really
here?”
“Where else would I
be, babe?” a voice that doesn’t belong to Jax whispers back.
Immediately my entire
body tenses. It wasn’t real. I’m not with Jax. It was just a
dream. When I open my eyes, Kohen’s dark blue ones stare back at
me. If I wasn’t in Kohen’s arms right now, I would smack myself.
I can’t believe that my dream of Jax was so vivid that I carried it
with me when I woke up . . . actually I can. Jax isn’t the type of
guy easily forgotten, dream or otherwise. I take a couple deep
breaths and count to five. I can do this. I can move on. Kohen is
changing, he wants to be better for me, for us.
Remembering that I
never answered him I say, “I thought you would be up by now.”
“I’ve been up for
an hour or so. I just couldn’t get out of bed. I finally have you
and I’m never going to let you go.” He squeezes me closer to
prove his point. I know that I should find his statement endearing,
but I don’t. The way he said “never” isn’t settling well with
me.
“Do you want to go on
the boat today?” Kohen sits up and yanks me with him so that I’m
still using his chest as a pillow.
“I would love to,”
I say with more enthusiasm than I’m feeling.
“Great. Then we
should start getting ready. There’s a storm coming so we need to be
back before it hits.” Kohen climbs out of bed.
“No more sleep?” I
complain.
Kohen stops in his
tracks on the way to the bathroom. “You’ve slept enough, Adalynn.
It’s time to get up now. You might be able to take a nap later when
we get back since you’ll be awake all night this time.” He shoots
me a warning look before continuing to the bathroom.
Well, I guess someone
isn’t in the mood to be playful this morning. Rolling my eyes, I
wonder if the tampons in the bathroom are for me or for him. With his
moods swings this morning, it’s a tough call. Hesitantly I walk
over to the bathroom.
“Do we have any
special plans tonight?” I reach for my toothbrush.
Kohen doesn’t answer
me at first. He continues to brush his teeth without looking at me.
Its obvious that he’s mad, I just have no idea why. He was fine a
few minutes ago. If he’s seriously mad about my joke, he needs to
get over it. I enjoy my sleep more than anyone I know and that’s
not something that’s going to change.
“Everything is
special if you’re involved,” Kohen says once he’s done brushing
his teeth.
I can’t help the
nervousness sinking into my voice when I ask, “Well, is there
anything special for tonight since you just said you want me awake?”
If he’s hinting that
he wants to take our relationship further, I’m out of here. That is
not going slow and it’s not what I want. Even though taking our
relationship to the next level might help me wash away my feelings
for Jax, I can’t. I’m not ready and it wouldn’t be fair to
Kohen since there’s a good chance I’ll be picturing Jax which is
so not how I’ve imagined our first time.
Kohen marches over to
turn on the shower. He takes deep breaths, trying to calm himself, I
think. Again, I have no idea what’s going on. All I asked was a
simple question.
“I would just prefer
that you don’t pass out on me again.” He strips out of his gym
shorts, steps into the shower and closes the door.
Feeling guilty that I’m
ruining our morning and the only day we’re going to be here, I
contemplate joining him in the shower. I know it’s not my fault for
how he’s acting this morning. If I’m enough for him, I should be
able to snap him out of it and make him happy.
Chewing my lip, I lift
my shirt, but stop before it even grazes my belly button. I don’t
want Kohen to see me naked for the first time pissed at me. Deciding
to let him calm down, I change into a bikini and a pair of shorts,
despite the chill in the air. I’ll make us breakfast and call my
brother while waiting for everything to cook.
Perfect
game plan.
I steal Kohen’s phone and head down the
stairs.
In the kitchen, I press
the home screen on Kohen’s phone. I frown. It’s
password-protected. He’s never had one before. I know the easiest
thing would be to ask for the password, or to at least wait for him
to come down here. I do neither. The easiest way is always the most
boring. Hmm . . . My finger hovers over the screen. I can’t think
of anything to guess. I doubt it’s his birthday . . . which I don’t
even know. I try mine instead. I’m not surprised when it vibrates
in my hand, informing me that I didn’t crack the code.
I set his phone on the
counter and start making pancakes. There’s a lot that I don’t
know about Kohen. That isn’t soothing since I’m trapped here with
him until tomorrow when we go back to the city. I need to make a
point of getting to know him before we return. This is our
make-it-or-break-it vacation.
I’m not tip-toeing
around someone I’m in a relationship with, I’ve done enough of
that with Jax. If I continue to have this sick feeling in the bottom
of my stomach, I have to end it. Kohen isn’t the type of guy to use
as a rebound. He’s the plan-your-future-with, marrying type of man.
I can’t even say who I see in my future. Before I always saw Jax,
but now it’s just me. Alone.
I jump a good three
feet in the air when Kohen startles me. “Why is my phone down
here?”
“Breakfast is almost
ready.” I ignore his question.
His sandy brown hair is
still wet from the shower. A few drops drizzle down his wet hair and
onto on his white pull-over. I start to feel hot. My reaction to the
sight of him takes me by surprise. My mouth waters, imagining what
he’ll taste like if I lick up the water. I swallow loudly.
Kohen walks towards me
and grabs plates from the cupboard. “Why is my phone down here?”
he asks again while he hands me the plates.
And just like that, I’m
back to being nervous around him, and not because I’m attracted to
him. “Thanks,” I say timidly. I put pancakes on both of our
plates, add syrup, and fruit on the side. “Can you grab us orange
juice?”
Kohen is already
pouring juice in two glasses. I carry our plates to the patio table
outside to enjoy the nice weather before the storm comes in. It’s
still sunny, but dark clouds roll in and the waves crash violently
into each other. I love storms.
“Are you going to
answer my question?” Kohen snaps my attention back to him.
I sit beside him in the
beige fabric-covered patio chair. “Sorry. I didn’t think it was a
big deal. I was going to call my brother to see how his flight was.”
Kohen doesn’t touch
his food. I can hear his teeth grinding. He takes a deep breath to
calm himself. A move that I’m familiar with.
“Next time can you
just ask? I don’t like my things out of place.”
“Yeah, sorry.”
Wow. I had no idea he
would make such a big deal out of this. He’s acting like I
destroyed his house while he was in the shower, not grabbing his
phone from the charger and bringing it to the kitchen. Besides he’s
one to talk. I don’t recall asking him to unpack my stuff.
“It’s fine. Next
time just ask.”
I don’t see us
lasting past this weekend. As much as I want to end things with him,
it’s better to wait until we return home. I’m trapped here. No
phone, no car. Besides, I’m hoping that we can turn this morning
around.
He’s having a rough
morning,
I need to stop reading into something that’s
not there. Everything will be fine once I get him out of his funk.
“I didn’t even call
him. You have a password now so I couldn’t get into your phone.”
Kohen nods but doesn’t
explain. I’m not surprised that he doesn’t want to share why he
has a password on his phone. However, I did think he would unlock his
phone for me and hand it over so I could call Logan. Whatever, I’ll
call him before we leave. We both eat our food in silence. It’s not
a comfortable silence either; tension swims in the air.