Beautifully Shattered (The Beautifully Series Book 1) (66 page)

Caressing my face,
Kohen places a chaste kiss on my lips. Somehow, I’m able to stop
from grimacing.

“What? All you have
to do is ask, Adalynn.”

So now I’m Adalynn
again. I shake my head.

“I’ll give you
whatever you need.”

“No, I don’t
deserve it. I shouldn’t have said anything,” I whisper.

Another kiss. “Please
talk to me, baby. I’ll do whatever you want.”

“I wanted to ask if I
can come out . . . to spend the night with you . . .” I force
myself to draw a calming breath before I say the biggest lie in the
world. “I can’t sleep without your ams around me.”

Kohen stills. I scoot
closer until our lips touch.

“I just want you to
love me,” I say against his lips.

Do
not throw up.

“I love you so much,”
Kohen says against my lips.

Not being able to say
the words back, I kiss him. I drown everything out. I drown out that
I’m stuck in a hole with a lunatic, that I’m probably going to
die soon like the other Ems, and focus on the only thing that makes
me able to hold on. I think of Jax. I picture his face, his lips. My
imagination is running wild that I can actually smell him. I pretend
that Kohen is Jax and kiss him like I would be kissing Jax right now.

When Kohen pulls away,
we’re both breathless, but for different reasons. He enjoyed the
kiss, I tried not to throw up in his mouth.

“It’s late. Let’s
have dinner before we go to
bed.
”

The way he says bed
makes my chest tighten. I feel like I can’t breathe. He has no
plans of sleeping tonight. The tears prickle but I force them back. I
wipe my eyes before we leave my prison.

I wrap my arm around
his waist and rest my head against his side. “What do you want me
to make you for dinner?”

Kohen laughs, a laugh
that I used to think I could love one day. I was so terribly wrong.
“You’re too cute. I’m going to make us dinner. I want to cook
for you for the rest of our lives. I’ll always take care of you.”

I step away from him
but clasp his hand and kiss his fingertips. This is easier if I
pretend that he’s Jax. I can almost stomach it.

“I know.”

He snatches my hands
and tugs me back to his side. I remind myself to stay calm, but I’m
still trembling. He knows I’m lying. He’s going to hurt me again.
Distract him.
As soon
as that idea blossoms, it dawns on me why he’s angry again. My
knuckles are bleeding from punching the door.

It isn’t until he
strokes underneath the bleeding flesh that I feel the pain. “What
did you do?”

I cast my eyes down,
hoping that he thinks I feel guilty. “I just wanted to be with
you.”

He tilts up my chin
with his now blood-covered finger. “You did this to yourself to be
near me?”

Instead of kicking him
in the balls, I lean into him. “All I’ve ever wanted was to be
close to you.”

His blue eyes shine
with happiness. I match my smile to his. Inside I’m screaming,
YOU’RE FUCKING CRAZY!
He
leads me the rest of the way to the kitchen and pulls out a chair for
me.

“Don’t move, I’m
going to get my first-aid kit.” He says it sweetly, but I know he’s
threatening me.

Once he leaves, I move
to the patio doors. They won’t open. I turn the locks, but they it
still won’t budge. Glancing up, I notice another lock at the top
right hand corner. There’s no way this will be my escape unless I
have a key. I haunt everywhere for some kind of weapon. Bingo! The
knife rack. I tiptoe towards it then fling myself back into my seat
when his loud footsteps near. I calm my breathing so that he doesn’t
notice anything is wrong.

He sets the first-aid
kit on the table and then takes the seat next to me. “I wish this
afternoon never happened. You’ll never know how sorry I am,” he
says as he inspects my knuckles.

“Stop that. If you
didn’t, we wouldn’t be here. You didn’t mean to hurt me. And
now that I understand how much you love me, it won’t happen again.
I will never act like that again. I can’t stand it when you’re
angry with me.”

Yeah . . . because you
like to smack me around.

I force my attention
back to Kohen instead of the shiny object that will help me escape. I
can’t let him realize my plan. If I have any hope of leaving him,
he needs to buy into my lies. I keep my smile firmly in place as he
rambles about our future. I ignore every word and replay Jax telling
me he loved me for the first time nine years ago.

All too soon, Kohen
carries the first-aid kit into the bathroom. Before returning to my
side, he snags an icepack from the freezer. “Here. This will help
the swelling.”

“Thanks.”

Setting the ice pack on
my face, I watch him with love shining through my eyes. I’ve
mastered wearing a mask for so long that it slips easily into place.
Every smile and every kiss I blow his way, he believes. He doesn’t
detect the pure hatred I feel for him. He doesn’t see that I’m
planning my escape. I imagine sinking a knife into his chest where
his heart should be.

Half-way through
dinner, I squirm in my seat. I wait for Kohen to notice. It takes a
lot longer than I expect. When he acknowledges me I ask, “May I be
excused to use the restroom?”

Kohen nods his
approval. “You know you don’t have to ask.”

I rest my hand on top
of his. “I know. . . It’s just that I didn’t want you to think
I was leaving . . . I can’t believe that you thought I could leave
you. You know I don’t think that’s possible, right?” I don’t
even have to lie. I know that there’s little hope for my escape.

His smile is anything
but charming as he says, “Cause you know I’ll find you again?”

Leaning over, I nip his
ear with my teeth. He moans and I imagine stabbing him in the throat
with his fork.

“No, because I could
never leave you. You love me,” I whisper before walking away.

I force myself to
calmly head to the bathroom. I see the front door, but I don’t make
my move. Not yet. I need to prepare. I don’t even bother with the
lock as I shut the door. I don’t want to give him any reason to hit
me, or worse, lock me back into my prison.

As quickly as possible,
I open the drawers. I smile triumphantly when I spot the small white
first-aid kit. Grabbing what I need, I secure it in the side of my
bra so he doesn’t notice. I flush the toilet and wash my hands. I
make sure that everything is tucked away before I join him back in
the dining room.

When I’m almost done
with dinner, I yawn then wince.

“Are you okay, babe?”

I nod and wipe away an
imaginary tear. Kohen springs out of his seat and squats in front of
me before I can blink. He’s fast. I need to remember that.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m just sore.”
I look away and wait for him to pull my face towards his.

Bingo.

“I want to be with
you. I just wish that it could be . . .”

I smile in my head when
he asks, “What? How do you want it to be?”

“Since it’s our
first time, I just wanted everything to be perfect. I want it to be
perfect for you . . . I’m not perfect right now.”

Kohen’s eyes gleam
with regret. “I’m so sorry ba—”

I cut him off. If I
hear him call me baby one more time, I might lose it.

“Don’t be, it’s
my fault. I just wish that we could wait.” I place my lips close to
his again. “But don’t worry. It doesn’t have to be perfect. I’m
just over-thinking it.”

Kohen yanks me out of
my chair. He crashes his mouth against mine and kisses me roughly.
Keeping up the act, I kiss him back. I even go as far as moaning into
his mouth and clinging to him like I’m desperate for him.

Kohen breaks away first
only because I force myself to keep kissing him. I have to make this
believable. Tonight is the only night I have. I won’t let him have
me. I won’t be his prisoner. I will either escape or I’ll die.
Either way, I’ll be free.

As Kohen turns around
to lead the way to the stairs, I make my move. Slowly I slip the
scalpel out of the side of my dress. I keep my eyes on Kohen’s
back. He continues walking, oblivious. I jerk my arm out of his and
aim for my target. His neck. He turns at the same time I slam the
scalpel into him.

I miss.

Instead of his neck, I
sink it into the top of his shoulder. I don’t know who screams
louder, him, or me when I crash into the foyer table from the force
of his blow. Glass scatters everywhere. I push myself to my feet,
ignoring the glass embedded into my hands, and run the short distance
to the door. My legs are kicked out from underneath me.

I grit my teeth as
glass rips through my too-thin dress and slides into my back.
Blindly, I reach for a large shard that I can use to stab him. His
hands wrap around my neck.

I stare into his black
eyes as he strangles me. I need to find . . . something to hurt him .
. . with. My vision blurs as the remaining oxygen begins to leave my
body.

There!

Clutching the shard in
my hand, I stab him in the thigh. The second it sinks into him, he
releases my throat. He yanks it out and blood gushes out of him. He
tries to control the bleeding with his hands as I crawl away from
him.

Kohen screams at me as
I crawl to the door. Ignoring him, I fumble with the locks. He’s
staggering to his feet by the time I open it. He yells again, but
it’s swallowed up by the screeching alarm I was unaware he set.

Running out of that
disastrous house as fast as I can, I stumble down the porch and onto
the grass. It takes a second too long to gather my bearings. Once I’m
able to breathe in the fresh air, I flee. Rain has moistened the
sand, making it that much harder to gain distance.

Every few feet, my legs
carry me from the biggest mistake of my life. I look behind me to
make sure Kohen isn’t following. As the rain falls harder, I push
myself faster, forcing my feet to carry me through the thick sand.

Along the edge of the
small cliff, I duck behind the bushes and pant. I brush the branches
and leaves out of my way so I can peer through them. Slowly I sit up
to look over the bush. The heavy rain screens the house from view.
Not hearing signs of Kohen, I lunch forward into a run.

Thunder rumbles off
every thirty seconds, a welcoming distraction from the constant
ringing in my ears. The sky is dark, the angry ocean crashes into the
side of the cliff. Rain pours down so hard it’s impossible to see
more than a few feet in front of me and even then I have to squint to
make out objects. The lightning is the worst; it’s mocking me by
illuminating the entire area. The thunderous bang of the angry sky
matches the heavy beating of my heart.

Just
keep moving forward. Kohen will kill me if he finds me.
These
thoughts spin on a wheel, not allowing anything else in to distract
me. Each step takes me away from the one man I thought I could trust.
Kohen made it easy for me to believe his lies. I never thought he was
capable of truly hurting me, I thought he loved me. I wanted to
believe that he loved me, that I was capable of being loved.

I was wrong on so many
levels, it’s almost laughable.

The rustling in the
bushes to my right catches my gaze. I keep my focus on the bush as I
run. I don’t see him.
It’s
just the storm,
I tell myself, but I feel Kohen watching
me, waiting for me to mess up, so he can capture me. I can’t let
that happen. I force my exhausted legs to push harder, to carry me
faster. I squint and spot a thick evergreen in the distance. That’s
my target. If I can get there, I can hide again for a breather.

Finding energy that
wasn’t there before, I sprint forward, towards the tree. From the
continuous downpour, it’s harder to move around in the sand. My
left foot gets stuck in the mud and I tumble hard onto the ground.

“Fuck!” I yell as
my hip connects with a jagged rock.

Luckily, thunder
decides to strike at the same time I yell, drowning out all noise.
Placing one hand on my hip, I use the other to help me scramble to my
feet. I plant my hand on my hip as I continue to run. Pain shoots
through my hip with each step, but I can’t stop. If Kohen finds me,
it will be worse than any injury I’ve suffered tonight.

Managing to make it to
the tree, I quickly step behind it. Gasping for air, I lean my head
against the trunk and rest for a second. I lift the bottom of my
mud-splattered shirt to evaluate the damage.
Just
a scratch,
I tell myself even though I know I need
stitches. Thick mud covers my clothes in clumps, leaves and twigs are
tangled into my hair.

My entire body tenses
when I hear a noise. I can’t tell if it’s him or wind from the
storm. I wait for what feels like minutes but is mere seconds,
unmoving, locked into place.
It’s
just the wind. Not him. I left him. Keep moving!

I look around the tree
to see if I can glimpse what I heard. Nothing. I press my hand back
to my hip before I run from the protection of the tree, into the
darkness, and farther away from Kohen.

I pause long enough to
glance around to try and figure out which direction I should be
running towards. Its impossible to tell where I am with the rain
beating down from the angry night’s sky. I see lights in the
distance that appear to belong to a car. I sprint in that direction.
As I get closer, I spot the beam of lights again and I know they’re
headlights.
Keep moving.
I’m a survivor. Get to the
road.
If I make it to the road in time to stop that car,
I’ll be safe.

With my escape less
than a mile away, I push myself with newfound energy. I finally reach
the last bend of the private property. The waves slam into the
cliff’s side below me, spraying ocean water onto my path. I trip on
a root that has surfaced and fall into a large puddle, cutting my
hand on a sharp edge.