Bedding The Bodyguard (18 page)

That second accusation was ludicrous, and just by looking at her, he could tell she thought the same thing. She was reaching for any excuse to push him away now, and of course she had good reason.

He waited a few beats this time and when she didn’t go on he said, “Are you finished?”

Her eyebrow went up. “Absolutely.”

His heart pounded. He heard the message behind her words. That she wasn’t just finished talking, she was finished with him.

“Kat, I’m sorry for lying, but you’ve never been just a job to me. Yes, I have issues because of what happened to my father. My job sometimes assuages the guilt I feel about no one being there to look out for him when he needed it. But that’s not what this is about. It’s about you, Kat. It’s about us and what we’ve managed to find here together.”

For a moment, her eyes softened, but then she shook her head and scowled. “Save it. I can’t trust you. From day one, you lied to me and you manipulated me, and I am not willing to overlook that for one second. The worst part is that you made a fool out of me, and I should have known better. I
let
you make a fool out of me.”

He reached for her but she evaded his grasp. His heart, already bruised, ached more fiercely. He tried again. “No Kat, you’re not a fool. Almost everything I’ve told you—everything about my family and my feelings—is the absolute truth. All I withheld was my last name and my occupation.” Wincing, he ran his hand through his hair. “And okay, Bella isn’t actually mine and I only had that Nicholas Sparks book to project a certain image.”

She gave a soft cry, as if his deception about Bella and that damn book cut her the deepest of all.

“Baby, I
hated
doing that, and I knew that you deserved to know the truth. I was coming to tell you today. That’s why I’m here. Can’t we just start over?”

Please say yes. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you.
He stared at her, mute, hoping she would see that plea in his face and eyes.

“No Luke, I’m sorry…but no.”

Luke wanted to argue with her. He wanted to beg. He didn’t do either. He hadn’t seen her this angry before, but he could tell that she was in no mood for long discussions or forgiveness at this point.

“What you did was hurtful and wrong. You don’t just get to waltz in here and apologize and have me fall back into your arms. I’ve been lied to enough to know that anyone willing to lie once is willing to lie a second time. And a third. It never ends.”

He
had
lied to her, and there was no way to deny that. There was no way to go back in time and introduce himself as Luke Indigo, bodyguard. But he couldn’t let things end this way. “Kat—”

“Please go. And please don’t come back.” With a soft thud, she closed the door and engaged the lock.

Feeling helpless, Luke took Bella and left.

He couldn’t remember ever being so angry with himself. He prided himself on his gut instincts, yet when his gut had told him to tell her the truth, he’d made excuses time and again. Maybe that had been justified in the beginning, when he’d thought she still might be in danger, but after that possibility had diminished, he should have come clean with her. Now she thought everything that had happened between them was a lie. How could he convince her that their time together had been as real as any relationship he’d ever had?

As he walked back into his own cabin it dawned on him that she hadn’t said how she’d learned his identity. There was one sure way to find out. He called Cole.

“Hey,” Cole answered. “I was just going to call you. How is Kat handling the photos?”

Luke frowned. “What photos?”

“The press released pictures of the two of you out in Tahoe having a good time. You’ve been dubbed ‘Bailey’s Bodyguard Beau’. It looks like there’s a perfect storm brewing and you two are right in the center of it. I hear the paparazzi are headed toward you en masse.”

“Fuck! Damn it!” Luke wanted to hit something. Luckily he was smart enough to know that would only make matters worse. Perfect storm. Cole had that right. A shit storm, that was what it was, and he and Kat were definitely right at the center of it. “She must have seen the news or something. Either that or someone told her about them before I had a chance to come clean.”

“So talk to her. Explain.”

“I did,” he said, dragging a hand through his hair. “Too late. She’d already learned about the photos. What the hell am I going to do, Cole? I don’t want to lose her. I can’t.”

“I know you don’t want to hear this, buddy, but maybe the way to show her how you feel is to back off and give her the freedom she wants.”

“Are you insane? And what? Leave her out here on her own? People know where she is now. This would be the worst time for me to leave!”

“Or maybe it would be the perfect time to show her that you care for her, and that part of that means letting her make her own choices about her safety. She’s dealt with the press for a long time and will continue to do so. Luke, I don’t think you can be both her bodyguard and her boyfriend. You’re going to have to choose.”

“I don’t want to choose,” he said, although he knew Cole had a very good point.

“You could always have someone else look out for her.”

“She was reluctant to have a bodyguard before. I’ve probably made that worse.”

They talked a bit more. Luke told his friend how much he’d come to care about Kat and how different she was from his initial expectations. When he finally hung up he had a large knot in his belly, and an even bigger ache in his chest. He couldn’t stand the thought of losing her but he had to admit the truth to himself.

He’d already lost her. The question was whether he could win her back.

Of course he knew it was impossible to safeguard someone against danger one hundred percent of the time, and that was especially true if the person being guarded was resisting that protection. Kat had the right to live and enjoy her life. He wanted that for her. As much as he was tempted to put her in a plastic bubble like a precious heirloom, he couldn’t. The best thing to do at this point was let her go and hope that maybe, just maybe, she’d come back to him.

With a heavy sigh, he retrieved what he needed then made his way back to Kat’s cabin. He had to do this, and do it quickly. He was afraid if he didn’t, he would change his mind.

Once again, he knocked on the door and waited. When she answered, she looked more tired than angry. “Luke, I really don’t have the energy to rehash this.” She kept the door open only wide enough for her to stand in front of it. It was a clear sign that she wasn’t going to invite him inside.

“I’m going to pack up tonight and I’ll be leaving first thing in the morning. I’m sorry for lying to you, Kat. At first, I really did believe I was doing the right thing to keep you safe. Then, when it appeared you were safe, I wasn’t sure how to tell you who I was without losing you. But that’s no excuse. You had a right to know. A right to make decisions while knowing everything.”

“Thank you,” she said softly. He thought he heard a catch in her voice. The last thing he wanted to do before he left was see her cry, especially if he was the one bringing it on instead of being the one to comfort her.

“You might already know this, but the driver who almost ran you off the road? It was an accident. An elderly man who had no business being behind a wheel. And your stalker? The one that’s been threatening you? Arrested after he broke into your house.”

Kat closed her eyes and leaned against the doorjamb, as if she no longer had the strength to support herself. When she opened her eyes again, her gaze was blank. Numb.

“How long have you known?”

“About the elderly driver, a few days. I just learned about your stalker’s arrest yesterday, while we were in town.”

“That was the text you got when we were in the store?”

He nodded.

She swallowed hard, then straightened again. “Well, thank you for telling me. Goodbye, Luke.”

She began to close the door, only stopping when he said, “Wait!”

She gave him a suspicious look but she didn’t say anything.

“I know about the photos in the paper. People know where you are, including the press. If you decide to stay here, please be smart. My team and I set up equipment outside the cabins when we arrived.”

Her eyes widened and he mentally cursed. God, he was delivering one blow after another. How much more could she take before she snapped?

“You and your team have been watching me? Oh my God. Are there cameras inside? Did you let them watch us—”

“Kat, no! No cameras inside, I swear. And my team—two men who accompanied me here—left before I took you to the casino. I swear, they had no idea how close we were getting.”

Her relief was palpable and he wanted to kick his own ass for upsetting her again. The most he could give her was what she wanted in that moment—for him to leave her alone. “Kat, the surveillance equipment is still up outside. This tablet is the monitor.” He held it up and activated the monitoring program with one tap. Then he held it out, showing her the images on the screen. “It’s just that easy to use. Keep it plugged in, please, and be safe.”

For a second, she looked like she wanted to rip the tablet out of his hands and smash it on the ground. Instead, after only a brief hesitation, she nodded stiffly. She reached out to take the tablet and the charging cord, and their hands touched. A brief touch, but one that sent little tingles all up his arm and through his body.

He swallowed hard. “Kat, I would love to see you again but I’m going to leave that completely in your hands. You know where to find me if you need me or if you just want to see me.”

She looked surprised and he shook his head. “This isn’t easy for me. I’m fighting myself not to stay with you. I’ve never walked away from anything I wanted and, angel, I’ve never wanted anything as badly as I want you.”

After Luke left, Kat looked down at the tablet in her hand. She walked to the outlet next to the dining table and plugged it in. Then she began pacing the length of the cabin when all she wanted to do was rush after Luke and beg him not to leave her. Ever.

Had she been too hard on him? She didn’t know what to think. She’d been so angry earlier, both after Charlie’s call and after taking the time to look up the photos of her and Luke on her smartphone. She’d felt so betrayed. She’d thought he cared about her and he’d played her from day one.

But then he’d knocked on her door and apologized and told her how much he cared. She’d had no idea what to think. When he’d left the first time, she’d
wanted
go to him, too but she hadn’t allowed that either. She hadn’t trusted her own judgment. She’d been wrong too many times already.

Good thing she’d held back, too. Because what he’d told her before had been bad enough—Bella wasn’t even his dog!—, but he’d actually set up cameras to watch her! He’d brought other men to watch over her. God, his deception had been so elaborate. So calculated. Had he and his men laughed about how easy it had been to con her? Had they sat around looking at the topless photos Ray had leaked of her? Had he planned all along to fuck her and then report back to them how easy it had been to get the famous Kat Bailey all hot and bothered?

But no, he’s told her his men had left by the time they’d had their date at the casino. Only how could she believe him?

Dropping into an armchair, Kat dropped her face into her hands.

That was the problem in a nutshell. No matter how much Luke claimed to care for her and want her forgiveness, there was no way to be sure when he was lying to her and when he wasn’t. Deception came so easily to him.

But wasn’t that part of protecting someone? Doing whatever it took to keep that person safe? She
was
safe now, and thanks to her running away and failing to check in with Charlie, she wouldn’t have known that but for Luke. Maybe he’d just been doing the hard stuff while she’d been burying her head in the sand.

With a frustrated groan, Kat shot out of her seat. God, she was driving herself crazy trying to make sense of all this. Maybe she
should
talk to Luke before he left. Or maybe not.

Spotting her purse, she grabbed it along with her car keys. She needed to get some space from him before her feelings ran over her good sense and she went over there. She locked up the cabin and drove to the same casino they’d visited just days earlier. She walked into the loud, busy place and looked around. It just made her miss Luke even more.

She tried her hand at the blackjack tables, but her little wins weren’t fun without Luke there to cheer her on. She left the tables and was wandering the floor when she sensed movement beside her.

“Hello there.”

The man beside her had a heavy accent. With dark skin and black hair, he was dressed in an expensive suit. He was smiling and his white teeth were perfectly straight.

“Hi,” she said, cautiously.

“You’re Kat Bailey, aren’t you?” She hesitated, and he held out his hand. “My name is Hussein Nayeri. I recognized you from the papers.”

Great.

He looked behind and around her. “Your bodyguard, this Indigo fellow, is good. I don’t even see him.”

“I don’t have a bodyguard. Luke was just a…friend who happens to be a bodyguard.”
Is he my friend? Friends don’t lie to each other. Ben would never lie.

“Oh. Well, I don’t want to sound like an opportunist, but if he’s not busy with you, I wonder if he might be interested in taking another job. My son Omar is turning twenty-one and his party is going to be held here at the resort.”

Kat raised an eyebrow. “Why does he need a bodyguard?”

Hussein chuckled. “Omar recently made People Magazine’s Top 20 list of Richest Eligible Bachelors Under Twenty. My wife and I have been shocked at the sheer number of young women here at the resort vying for his attentions. They clamor to be near him. They think they know him because of what they’ve read about him in the papers. I’ve not seen anything like it before. He’s even run across a few with jealous boyfriends. Omar’s a good kid and I worry that someone is going to do something stupid and jeopardize his safety. Oh, here he is now.”