Beginning with Forever (26 page)

“Thanks, Lily.
It was awful to see him suffer through his last remaining months. No one should ever have to go through that kind of pain and misery. Those memories still haunt my family to this day,” he clears his shaky voice. “May I ask why you’re here instead of studying in St. Croix?” He quickly changes the subject, possibly trying to avoid exposing any more of his vulnerable side. I ignore the eerie fact that he knows where I’m at in my life without me offering him this information and respond to his question.

“I’m
here as Carson Bradley’s date,” I answer him blushingly.

“
Really? The Carson Bradley of Bradley Pharmaceutical Corporation? Whoa Lily, I hope you know who you’re up against.” His expression is full of concern, and his question is loaded.

“What do you mean by that
, and he’s
what
?” I can’t believe my ears as I look at him in disbelief. I don’t think I heard him correctly.

“
He’s the CEO of his billion dollar company. I don’t know this for a fact, but he’s also well known as a heartbreaker and a major player. He has commitment issues, Lily. No woman has ever lasted longer than a few weeks to several months with him until two years ago. Somehow this woman convinced him to marry her, but he cancelled the wedding at the very last minute,” he stalls with a reflective look on his face. “I think maybe over three weeks ago.” Hayden subtly points over to his left. “See that woman dancing with him? She’s the one. Her name is Bianca Sorte,” he frankly tells me.

I look over
at Carson and immediately recognize the barely dressed blonde woman in his arms. She’s the woman in his picture back at the condo as well as his ‘Favorite Blonde.’ The back of her dress is cut so absurdly low that it leaves nothing to anyone’s imagination. I’m feeling faint. I see Carson’s glaring eyes directed at me and avoid them. Why the hell is he glaring at me? I should be giving him the look of death for dancing so damn close to his sexy, recently ex-fiancée. I can’t believe I’ve been so blindsided by him. He hasn’t been entirely honest with me, but then he hasn’t lied about anything either.
I’ve only asked him if he’s ever loved anyone, but never asked if he was ever engaged.
I think sarcastically to myself. The Carson that Hayden just described to me is not the Carson that I know and care about. I wonder what other surprises I will encounter tonight.

It’s all making sense
to me now. This is Lillian’s month and after this week ends, he’ll move on to the next woman’s month. I’m feeling panicked for air as it thickens and chokes the life out of me. I finally gather enough hope to give my heart away, and it’s to the wrong man. I knew he was too perfect to be true. My eyes well up with tears, but I forbid myself to cry, at least not for now.

“Hayden, it’s b
een nice catching up with you. I hope we’ll see each other again.” I bravely put on a strong front, holding my tears back. I need to distance myself from this place and Carson as soon as possible. I feel deceived and jaded.

“Lily,
you look pale. Are you okay?” He offers me his arm. “Like I said earlier, I don’t know if there’s any truth to any of the gossip about Mr. Bradley. He seems like a nice enough guy from the few interactions we’ve had due to work.” Hayden regrets divulging some of those damning stats for Carson. He realizes that I’m completely unaware of Carson’s background.

“
I’m fine, Hayden. I just need some air.” I release his arm with my trembling hand and try to steady myself.

“I’ll
come with you.” He grabs my elbow, looking very concern for me.

“No, you
should stay here and enjoy yourself,” I cut him off. He hands me his hi-tech business card and asks me to save him another dance for later. I tuck his card in my clutch, give him a quick squeeze and rush away with the weight of this dreadful evening on my shoulders.

I
want to sob so desperately, but I force myself to hold my angry tears back for a while longer. I have to be strong and save these weak tears for later. I don’t want any of these women, especially Bianca, to see me broken because of Carson. I torture myself one last time by glancing back at them to spot her arms still securely wrapped around his neck. Sadly, I make my way for the exit, clenching tightly on to my fragmented dignity. After a few cautious steps up the stairs, I feel a pull at my elbow. It’s Carson’s firm hand. His eyes are callously hardened.

“Whe
re do you think you’re going?” he interrogates distantly. I know this coldness from one other time. The time he was jealous about Richard.

“I need air.
The atmosphere in here is much too dense,” I respond with the same chilling factor in my voice while burning a hole in the ground with my heated glare. I haven’t wronged him. He’s the one who hasn’t been completely honest with me by failing to mention that he was almost married three weeks ago.

“You look
ed cozy dancing with Mr. Carter. Is he getting some air with you, too?” His eyes narrow stiffly with accusation. Seriously, is he for real? Did he just imply that Hayden and I have something going on? He has some balls.

“Carson, it just happens that Hayden and I are old friends
from all the way back to elementary school. We’re just catching up. I could ask the same of you and that blonde,” I angrily defend myself. His body immediately fills with tension as soon as I mention her. He runs his fingers through his hair with immense frustration.

“I
saw the way he looked at you. I read his body language. I know when a man desires a woman.” He ignores my mention of the blonde woman, and it pisses me off even more.

“D
on’t give me your jealousy bullshit, Carson! I’ve been more than accommodating while tons of women throw themselves at you this evening. I’m tired of watching them fight for your attention. I’m not the sharing or fighting type. I don’t belong here, and I never will. Go back to your party and stop disappointing those willing women,” My voice is more assertive and harsh than I want it to be.

“Lil,
don’t be upset. I hate seeing you unhappy because of me. It’s hard to share you with other men. It’s my insecurity, not yours. Please, come back with me. I promise I won’t leave your side again,” he pleads and reaches his hand out to me. I hesitate before accepting it. I only agree to set our differences aside and not cause a bigger scene because I know this charity function is particularly important to him.
But trust me, Carson Bradley; this is far from being over.
You owe me a huge explanation.

“I’m not done with you
yet; we still need to talk about your history with Bianca later tonight.” My tone is inflexible as I look directly into his stunned, green eyes. There’s a surprised expression on his face from the mention of her name. He’s probably wondering how much Hayden has divulged to me about his ex-fiancée.

He presses his lips against
my forehead and murmurs, “I promise I’ll tell you everything you want to know later tonight.”

“
I’m counting on it,” I reply curtly. He escorts me back to the ballroom with my hand in his as curious eyes stalk us, wondering what’s going on. Carson ignores them, luring me even closer to his side and places his hand on the small of my back. His touches, subtle or obvious, are always welcoming to me even when he’s not my favorite person.

“It’s time for my speech, a
nd then I’ll have you in my arms again,” he softly assures me, moistens his lips and places a gentle kiss on my neck, immediately melting me with his touch even though I’m still upset with him. He politely pulls a chair out for me to sit with his parents. “Mom, dad, please keep an eye on Lil for me.” He gives all three of us a playful smirk. His mother responds with a subtle sneer, not particularly excited with his request. Her reaction makes me want to take the next flight back to my humble little dorm and hide because I’m obviously not good enough for her son. I don’t think she can make it any clearer that she doesn’t like me.

“
I won’t have any problems keeping my eye on this young beauty,” his father replies and winks at me with a grin.

Carson squeezes the tops
of his father’s shoulders and playfully snaps, “Watch it, Dad, she’s already spoken for.” He smiles and walks to the stage.

Carson is
indisputably an impressive speaker. His passion to find the absolute cure for cancer is apparent. It sounds like he lost someone close to him to this horrible disease. He captures everyone’s undivided attention and continues to pour on his endless charm to the very end. The audience applauses loudly, giving him a deserving standing ovation. He ends his speech by encouraging his guests to continue to have a wonderful time. I feel personally proud to care for such an accomplished man with a genuine appreciation for humanitarian needs. My anger slowly dissipates as I remember the real reason I’m here.

Carson walk
s over to me, offers his hand and drags me onto the dance floor. “Didn’t I mention that you’ll be in my arms again?” he grins.

“I
’m not a good dancer.” I bashfully pull away, shaking my head to deter him. I hate to embarrass him in front of all his guests with my two left feet.

“All you
need to do is follow my lead. I’ll do the rest, just like in the bedroom,” he flirtatiously arches one eyebrow high. “May I have the pleasure of dancing with the most beautiful and challenging woman in this ballroom?” he requests with a smirk, reaching his hand out to me.

Carson signals the band, and it’s their cue to play a song
he requested, I’m assuming. I don’t recognize the tune. “What is it called?” I inquire.

“‘Right
Down The Line’ by Gerry Rafferty,” he tells me. “My parents used to dance to it often. I witnessed their unique kind of love and always wanted it for myself.” He draws my body closer to his and whispers, “Lily, I have a lot faith in us.”

“
I want to also, but I’m afraid,” I whisper back to him.

“
Don’t be. I only want to make you happy.” He places his left hand along my neck and draws my forehead against his lips. I need his reassurance more than ever, especially after the last two emotional nights. I watch Carson’s father lead his mother onto the dance floor with a doting smile. They do appear very much in love. His father gives him a thumb up behind his mother’s back and winks at us. His playfulness makes me grin ridiculously and squeeze my man even tighter. Carson sings the words into my ears, and those darn goosebumps reappear again. After hearing the lyrics, I can understand why he picked this particular song and what he’s trying to tell me. He wants me in his life and has no doubt in his heart about it. If only he can confirm that everything Hayden had told me is untrue, I would feel more certain. I also want a future with him in it, but he needs to trust me enough to be honest with me. My mind is on overload this evening. Carson imparts one light feathery kiss on my lips, and it brings me back to him. “Lily, have faith in us,” he repeats. Holding my hand, he leads me off the dance floor, but instead of heading back to our table, Carson takes me over to a table close to the bar. “I have an old friend I’d like to introduce you to. This is Jack Filmore. He’s the Dean of Harvard Medical School.” I’m caught off guard with Carson’s ambush.

“M
iss Ly, it’s a pleasure to meet you. Carson has been bragging about you and all your academic achievements. I’d be honored if you’ll allow me to give you a tour of our school,” he politely offers his hospitality while making me blush at the same time.

“
Dean Filmore, the honor is all mine, of course. I appreciate your offer,” I courteously reply with a weak smile. Hmm, I wonder what Carson is up to. If I had wanted to go to Harvard, I would’ve have applied there. Dean Filmore and I continue to have a lengthy conversation about the benefits of traditional residency versus an accelerated program. I personally don’t agree with his argument of traditional being superior, but I respectfully listen to his reasoning.

Carson could sense that the Dean’s
pushiness is annoying me and intervenes just before I could show his friend my headstrong side. “Jack, if you don’t mind, I’d like to steal my lovely date back.” Carson reaches for my hand, and I gladly take it.

“Miss Ly, hope to see you
on campus one of these days and enjoy the rest of your evening.” Dean Filmore sends Carson a hidden message with his subtle facial expressions as he talks to me. I almost get the feeling that they’re collectively up to something.

“Thank you Dean Filmore.” I forge another smile on m
y face and then turn to Carson. “Why did you introduce me to the Dean of Harvard Medical School?” I confront him with suspicion and irritation.

He
brings a tight fist to his mouth, hiding his deceptive grin and then clears his throat before answering my question. “I’m just trying to open up more doors for you, Angel.” He has the look of a guilty, scheming man caught in the act, and I’m onto him.

“Thank you
for trying, but I’m perfectly happy in St. Croix. I plan on finishing my remaining four years there,” I stubbornly tell him with my brows knitted and eyes narrowed. Carson has yet to realize how headstrong and unbending I can be when I’m determined about something. He’s definitely up for a challenge with me, there’s no doubt about that.