Jacqueline took a handful of the ground meat and formed a ball, lightly squeezing it between her palms. “Greg’s a great guy, yeah. But for you.
Maybe Kay’s not attracted to the same kind of men you are.”
“You’re saying she’s attracted to jerks like Billy Ray?” She pointed at the patty Jackie had made. “Poke a hole in the middle.”
Jacqueline stared. “What?”
Rose held hers open-faced, then stuck her index finger in the center of the patty. “Poke a hole.”
Jacqueline still stared. “You’re serious?”
“It keeps it from shrinking.”
“
What?”
“Geez, Jackie, it’s so simple. It won’t shrink up when you cook it.”
“Because there’s a
hole
in it?”
“Of course.”
Jacqueline laughed. “So, restaurants all across the nation haven’t caught on to this trick?”
“Very funny. Maybe they just haven’t figured it out yet.”
“How about we do half and half, and then we’ll measure shrinkage?”
“Will you stop being a smart-ass and poke a damn hole in it!”
Kay stared at Josh, struggling to find a topic for conversation. But all that would pop into her head were visions of her beating the holy crap out of Rose. So she smiled politely and cleared her throat, finally pointing to his empty beer bottle.
“Need another?”
“Well, if you’re buying,” he said with a laugh.
“I’ll get this round,” she said, barely able to avoid rolling her eyes as they walked toward the coolers. “So, Josh, how old are you?”
“Twenty-seven. You?”
“Older than that,” she said dryly.
Twenty-seven?
Yes, she would beat Rose to a pulp.
Jacqueline avoided the coolers of assorted beer, instead, filling a glass with iced tea. It was good and sweet, just like she remembered Mrs.
Garland making it. Sweet tea was not exactly a staple in Monterey. She faded into the shadows, watching the activity around her. Almost like old times, yes. But fifteen years still separated them. And she didn’t doubt that if she should disappear again, they wouldn’t cry over her being gone. Well, except Kay. Jacqueline knew Kay wouldn’t let her escape again.
With just the thought of Kay, Jacqueline’s eyes slid across the backyard, finding her immediately. Her body language was much like Jacqueline remembered from high school. Tall, aloof, arms crossed protectively along her waist. Jacqueline could see it now— the distance—but back then, she only saw Billy Ray and his nearness to Kay. She tumbled back fifteen years.
A
t the edge of the bleachers she peered through the shadows, watching
as Billy Ray clutched Kay’s arms, holding her tightly against the metal
as he moved forward.
She felt her heart catch painfully, and she had to force herself to remain
hidden. All instincts told her to run, run to them and pull Billy Ray to
the ground, away from Kay. She moaned with pain as Billy Ray leaned
forward, capturing Kay’s mouth forcefully.
She made herself turn away before Kay caught her again. She was
running out of excuses as to why she was following them. Instead, she
moved silently in the shadows, away from Kay . . . away from Kay and
the boy who was kissing her.
Jacqueline let out her breath as her vision cleared, finally admitting that it was not Billy Ray who held Kay’s attention this night. No, that honor went to a handsome young man named Josh. And as she stared, Kay’s eyes slid away from Josh, meeting her own, holding them captive.
Kay’s breath caught as she locked glances with Jackie. In an instant, she was taken back fifteen years, and she remembered that same haunted, wounded look . . . and the longing in Jackie’s eyes.
She never understood it before, could never put words to describe it.
But now, now that she was older, now that she
understood
, oh God, now the realization of that look hit with such clarity—such certainty—it simply took her breath away.
The longing in Jackie’s eyes was—it was for her. It always had been.
Oh my God.
Kay pulled her eyes from Jackie, blinking several times as she tried to focus on what Josh was saying. She finally shook her head. It didn’t matter.
“Excuse me,” she said, holding up her hand. “I hate to be rude, but . . .
excuse me.”
With that, she turned and walked purposefully toward Jackie, blue eyes locked on blue.
They stood close, eyes questioning. Finally, Jacqueline motioned with her head toward Josh.
“You like him?”
Kay shrugged. “Seems like a nice guy.”
Jacqueline nodded. “Good.”
“Good?”
Jacqueline cocked her head. “He’s kinda cute.”
Kay shrugged again. “You think so?”
Jacqueline forced a smile. “Sure.”
Kay lowered her head for a moment, then raised it, meeting Jackie’s eyes again.
“When I looked up and saw you watching, it reminded me of some other times, in high school,” Kay said quietly. “With Billy Ray.”
“Kay, I . . . I never—”
“No.” Kay reached out and clutched Jackie’s arms, silencing her. “Tell me, were you jealous of Billy Ray?” she asked softly. “Jealous when he kissed me?”
Jacqueline wanted to pull her eyes away, tried to pull her eyes away, but Kay held them. What could she say?
“Jackie? Were you?”
Jacqueline let out a heavy breath and closed her eyes. “Yes,” she finally whispered. She felt Kay’s hands squeeze her arms tightly.
“And I was so very jealous of Danny.”
Jacqueline raised her eyebrows. “
What
?”
Before Kay could answer, Eric appeared with who Jacqueline assumed was his Rhonda. A small woman—nearly a foot shorter than Eric—with
big
teased hair, she smiled brightly as she looked at Jacqueline.
“Now I remember her,” she said to Eric. She stuck out her hand.
“Rhonda Jones, nice to see you again.”
“Hi Rhonda. We’ve met?”
“I was two years behind you in school. Of course, I don’t expect you to remember me. I didn’t play sports. I was president of Future Homemakers for three years.”
Jacqueline smiled. Oh, yes, the club that taught you how to be a good little wife. Eric needn’t worry about having a well-kept home, at least.
“I apologize. I don’t remember you.”
“Don’t apologize. That was years and years ago.” Then she leaned closer. “What do you think of Josh for our Kay?”
“Rhonda—” Kay started, but Rhonda cut her off.
“He’s so nice, Kay. He’s sweet as sugar. Why, he’d make bees leave a honeycomb, for sure.”
“He is a nice guy,” Eric agreed. “He’s going to stay with me for the month.”
Kay nodded. “Yes, I know. Rose filled me in.”
“Good. We were hoping maybe the four of us could drive over to Jasper one evening and catch a movie,” Rhonda suggested.
“Dinner, too,” Eric added.
“We’ll see,” Kay said. Then she pointed at Jackie. “As I told Rose, I have company right now, and I want to spend time with Jackie.”
“I’m sure Jackie wouldn’t mind if you had a date,” Eric said.
Jacqueline was about to answer when she felt Kay squeeze her arm.
“She may not, but I mind, Eric. I haven’t seen Jackie in forever. And nothing against Josh, but I’d rather be with Jackie.”
So there, it was all decided, and Jacqueline had yet to open her mouth.
But she felt she should at least offer a night off for Kay, in case she really wanted to go on a
date
with this Josh person. The thought appalled her, but she offered anyway.
“I, er . . . I could manage on my own for a night if you wanted to go to a movie, Kay.”
Kay turned her head, ignoring the others as her blue eyes locked on Jackie’s. She tilted her head slightly. “Is that right?”
Jacqueline swallowed down the lump in her throat and simply nodded.
Then Kay smiled, her eyes softening. “Thanks, but I don’t really want to go to a movie.”
“Just dinner then,” Rhonda offered.
“Guys, please. I appreciate what you’re trying to do, and I know Rosie is behind this, but I’m just not interested in going out right now. Not with Josh or anyone else.”
“I swear, Kay, you’ve got to get over what that bastard did to you,” Eric said loudly. “You can’t carry that with you forever.”
“I know, Eric. But it really has nothing to do with Billy Ray.”
“There you guys are,” Rose called. “I found Josh wandering around by himself. How rude of you,” she said to the group, but her eyes were on Kay.
Kay smiled apologetically. “I’m sorry, Josh. I kinda ran out on you.”
“That’s okay. I found the beer,” he said, holding up a can. “Can I get you one?”
“No, thanks. I think I’ll have tea with dinner.” Kay looked at Rose.
“Speaking of that, do you need some help?”
“No. Greg’s putting the patties on the grill now. Everything else is ready.”
Jacqueline laughed. “The famous patties with the hole in the middle!”
Rose shook her finger at Jackie. “Kay, tell her about the shrinkage.”
Kay laughed, too. “Rose has done a very scientific study on shrinkage, and has concluded that hamburger patties without a hole in the middle shrink more than those with a hole. Therefore, all of her patties have holes in them!”
Josh frowned. “I don’t understand.”
Rose patted his hand. “Kay will explain to you over dinner.”
Kay and Jackie exchanged glances, then were pulled in opposite directions as Rose took Josh and Kay with her, and Eric and Rhonda drew Jackie over to the grill where Greg looked every bit the chef, apron and all.
He waved the spatula at them, then looked at Rhonda. “Do you mind checking with Rose about the wieners? She said she wanted to do a handful of hotdogs, too.”
“Sure, Greg.”
“I’d love a beer, Eric.”
“Coming right up. Jackie?”
“Sure. Light.”
Once alone, Greg smiled at her. “I’ve been watching. They’re all playing matchmaker with Kay and Josh, and she’d rather be with you.”
Jacqueline hoped the shadows hid her blush. “We just haven’t seen each other in so long, I think Kay’s afraid to miss any time.”
“I keep telling Rose to leave her alone, but Rose won’t rest until she has her married off again.”
“Kay can be stubborn.”
Greg laughed. “That’s true.” Then his expression turned serious. “Her eyes have been so lifeless for so many years, we hardly notice it any more. But the last week or so, since you’ve been back”—he looked directly at Jacqueline—“she’s got a spark again. Rose seems to think it’s because she got to talk to you about what happened, that maybe she’s finally put Billy Ray to rest. She thinks Kay might be receptive to dating now.”
Jacqueline shrugged. “Maybe so.”
During dinner, Jacqueline found herself squeezed on one of the picnic tables with Rose and Greg, Sammy and Tess, and Mr. and Mrs. Garland, and the grandkids. She tried to keep her eyes from straying to the other table, where Kay was sitting next to Josh, but invariably, she glanced there often. Eric and Rhonda were both talking at once, drawing Kay into conversation. And more often than not, Kay would look away from them, only to lock glances with Jacqueline.
“You know you’re babysitting tomorrow, right?”
Jacqueline looked at Rose with a blank stare. “Excuse me? Babysitting?
Kids?
”
“Just the two older ones. Mama keeps the twins.” At Jacqueline’s raised eyebrows, Rose shook her head. “Kay didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what?”
“Third Saturday of every month, Greg and I go over to Crockett. He’s got some friends there from college. We spend the weekend with them.
It’s the only time we have to get away. We’ve been doing it for the last couple of years.”
“Once a month?
Every
month?”
“We’ve skipped a couple of times, but not often.” Rose looked at Greg.
“But Greg tells me that this may be our last time for awhile.”
Jacqueline looked at Greg. “Why’s that?”
“I’ll probably be at the plant most Saturdays. At least until I feel comfortable with it all.”
Jacqueline nodded. She didn’t doubt Greg would be there most Sundays, too. And she knew, no matter how strong their marriage was, it would take its toll. She would talk privately with him later. “Don’t overdo it,”
was all she said now.
“He wanted to cancel this weekend,” Rose said.
“It’ll still be there Monday, Greg,” Jacqueline said. “I’m going to meet with John tomorrow, clear up a few things.”
“What’s that?” Rose asked.
“Just chain of command type thing, Rose,” Jacqueline said.
“Enough shop talk,” Mrs. Garland said. “I want to know about this Josh person. Is he trustworthy?”
“Mama, of course. Do you think I’d set her up with someone who’s not?”
“You? I thought it was Eric’s doing.”
Rose laughed. “Eric couldn’t play matchmaker to save his life!”
“He seems young,” Mr. Garland said.
“He’s a few years younger than Kay, but so what?” Rose leaned forward. “He’s
cute
.”
Mrs. Garland shook her head. “I’m not so certain Kay wants to be set up. In fact, I bet right now she’s wishing she was sitting over here with us.”
“Mama, she’s afraid to date, that’s all. And Eric has already put the fear of God in Josh if he touches her!”
Jacqueline’s eyes slid across the backyard to the other table. Kay looked lost in thought as the conversation went on around her. Then she lifted her head, eyes colliding with Jacqueline’s. Jacqueline’s breath left her at what she saw there . . . at what she
imagined
she saw. But Kay’s eyes were open to her, and she saw an understanding in them, an awareness that frightened Jacqueline a little. The voices around her faded, and she was suddenly afraid to go home with Kay tonight.
But in the end, it didn’t matter. Lee Ann had begged to spend the night with Aunt Kay and Kay had agreed. Jacqueline wondered if perhaps Kay was a little afraid to be alone with her as well.
Jacqueline waited patiently in John’s study, absently looking at the pictures displayed on nearly every available space. John was apparently very fond of his grandchildren. She turned around, moved to the leather sofa and sat. She had called earlier, promising to be brief. John had an eleven o’clock tee time. Mary ushered her into his study, saying John was just getting out of the shower.