Behind the Stars (28 page)

Jackson’s eyes widened and moved to mine. “One of them pretended to be your friend?”

“It wasn’t pretend,” I said.

He started pacing, running his hands through his hair. “Idiots! You think he let you escape? They didn’t let you escape. They’re tracking us!”

“He’s not like that!”

“Did he send you to that cave?” Jackson stood with his back against the tarp that formed the entrance. He moved it back a crack and peered up and around as if he thought we were surrounded.

“He’s on our side,” I said with more authority.

“He’s on their side,” Jackson snapped. “I don’t see anything. Now we’ve really got to act fast. Russell, get the boys to put that bonfire out.”

Russell slipped into the night, and I moved to follow him. But Jackson caught my arm.

“You’re not going back there,” he said.

“I have to.” I pulled my arm away. “I need to find out about Dr. Green and our parents. And I won’t leave Braxton or Yolanda or Roxie behind.”

Or Gallatin.

“I won’t let you go back there.” Jackson pulled me into a hug. I tried to push away, but he held on.

For a moment, I felt beaten. I was hurting. The pain of all that had happened to me, all I’d lost, what had happened to my friends, was so fresh, but I couldn’t give up. I wouldn’t act weak, and nothing in me wanted to stay here or to go back to my old life.

Instead, I got angry.

“C’mon,” D’Lo said, taking Star’s arm. She tried to jerk back, but D’Lo held on and half-carried, half-pushed her out of the tent.

“I’m sorry, Pip,” Jackson said once they were gone. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”

I didn’t answer, and he kept talking. “I know you’re mad at me, but I won’t let you go back there.”

“I’ll be okay.” I said, working to keep my voice calm. “They’re not going to hurt us.”

He grasped my shoulders and looked into my eyes. “It’s too dangerous, and I only just got you back.”

I tried to turn away. “I promised our friends I’d get them out, and anyway, I’m not back. It’s not the same with us anymore.”

“Don’t say that. This,” he waved around the shelter, “what’s happening now, is a special situation. Everything’s messed up, and bad stuff’s happening. But once it’s over, we’ll be back the way we were.”

My eyebrows pulled together. I didn’t agree with him at all. Even though bad things happened, I held onto what mattered to me—my memories of him and us. He’d taken the opportunity to forget. Now I didn’t want things to go back to the way they were before. I realized we’d grown apart, and we didn’t have the same dream anymore.

He tried to pull me to him again, but I struggled away.

“I told you I didn’t know,” he said as if reading my thoughts. “I thought you’d been killed. I was crazy worried about you.”

“You’ve been getting with her way before this. Stop lying to me.”

“You don’t understand. It’s different for guys, Pip.”

“No, it’s not.” I leaned down to pick up the small bag that held a water bottle and a bit of cooked rabbit in case I got lost. “I’m going because I gave my word to our friends. It has nothing to do with you and Star.”

Jackson caught my arm one more time. “I loved you, Prentiss Puckett. I still love you.”

“And now you want something different. Or maybe we never really wanted the same thing at all.”

Our blue eyes met. “I never wanted to be a farmer,” he said. “I tried everything to change your mind.”

My memories supported his words. “Why didn’t you just break up with me? Let me go?”

“Because you needed me. I’d always protected you, and I couldn’t let you go. I didn’t want to let you go.” He made a frustrated noise and turned away. “She’s not part of my future, Pip.”

“Neither am I.”

Gallatin’s face flickered across my memory, and I could still hear his last words. He hoped my dreams came true.

I didn’t know if they would. I didn’t even know what it would mean for me or what he’d say when he saw me again, but I had to find out.

I looked down and shook my head then I turned my back to my old dream. “I didn’t want to make you part of why I’m leaving, but you have to let me go now.”

His grip tightened. “You’ll get caught, and they’ll hurt you.”

“I won’t get caught.” I pulled my arm away. “And I won’t get hurt. I’ve learned something about myself.”

“What’s that?”

“I’m smart. I’m strong. And I can be strong without you. I can make my own future.”

His eyebrows pulled together. “Because of what D’Lo said? Because you’ve made friends with one of them? One of our enemies?”

“They’re not our enemies.”

“You sound like those kidnap victims who try to protect their kidnappers.”

“You don’t understand. They’re peaceful. They don’t even have weapons.”

“They don’t need them.”

I pressed my lips together. It was no use arguing with him.

“Don’t warn them, Pip.” He stepped forward and grabbed my arm, his fingers circling my bicep in a strong hold. “We’re coming tomorrow night. You get there and make a plan, then get our friends out.”

“What if it’s not enough time?”

“Make it enough time. And you never forget you’re one of us. You belong here.”

“I don’t belong here.” My voice was a low growl.

“Yes you do, and tomorrow night. That’s the end.”

An image of Gallatin crossed my mind. I pulled on my pack and ran out the tent.

––––––––

T
he night was pitch black in the open spaces, and in the trees it was even darker. Clouds filled the sky, and when the moon did appear, it wasn’t full enough or out long enough for me to make sense of my surroundings or to see far enough ahead.

I made my way out of Jackson’s camp in the direction we’d entered it, and I followed the path up two hills and back to the old school road, the dividing line between his place and theirs. I ran across it and then stopped and looked up at the tall, dark woods I’d only navigated once when I’d followed Jackson back. I stared at the shadowy mass before me, and as I did, the clouds swept away, uncovering the half-moon with its scant light.

My eyes traveled to our pale satellite, and all I could think of was Gallatin and finding him. Regardless of what Jackson said, I wouldn’t let them hurt him. Not wasting another second, I ran into the thicket and kept going straight. It was hard to tell if I was on the right path with the moon rushing out from behind the clouds only to disappear again just as fast. I tried to focus straight ahead, but I was blind most of the way. I remembered how I’d thought I could find my way back with my eyes closed the night we’d danced—
Come on, Prentiss. Focus!

I came to the foot of a steep hill that seemed to go straight up, and my heart rose. When we followed Jackson from the cave, I’d slid half the way down, landing on my butt several times and standing right back up from what seemed like a ninety-degree angle. This had to be the same hill.

Digging my fingers into the earth, I practically crawled up the slope. My knees pressed on the wet leaves, and their musty, earthy odor filled my nose. I shook with a chill, but it wasn’t cold. It never got cold in the summer here, even in the dead of night. I was just damp and surging with adrenaline.

After what felt like hours of struggling, slipping, and struggling again in the darkness, I reached the top and looked out, into more black forest. My shoulders dropped. It was so dark, I couldn’t see my hand in front of my face, and I was troubled that I hadn’t come across the cave where we’d slept.

If this was the right hill, I should’ve found the opening on my way up. I looked around and wished for the moon to appear, but it didn’t. Maybe I was on the right hill, but I came around from a different angle? I had no way to be sure, and a cold fear tightened in my stomach. What if I was lost in these woods and couldn’t find my way to the camp? All of this would’ve been for nothing.

I tried to encourage myself. In the daylight hours, I could determine which direction was east by the way the sun rose. But without the cave, I couldn’t tell the way Jackson had said to go. For a moment, I thought I might cry. My breath trembled in and out of my lungs, and I felt beaten.

Falling to my knees, I placed my forehead on my hand against a sapling near me. Maybe I should just wait for daylight instead of getting further and further off course. But that was wasting time.
Determination, grit, courage.
I had to summon all of it and press on. With my eyes closed, I tried to see the map in my head. I tried to retrace the path I’d followed here and feel the right way to go. I stood up and blindly began to run straight forward and a little to my left. My hands were stretched in front of me fumbling against the trees that tried to slam me in the face, dodging root-knees coming up from the ground.

Suddenly white-hot light blasted through the limbs. I could tell it was a good distance away, but it was powerful. It blazed the faintest blue with rainbow colors mixed around the edges, and the beams blinded my eyes as they flickered through the trees like harp strings.

My face heated in the energy of it, and the trunks narrowed as the light refracted around them. I took a step only to lose my footing. A root tripped me, and I slid fast, head-first on my stomach, down the side of the tall hill.

“
NO!
” I yelled, trying to stop my forward motion.

The Ships. They were the only source of a burning light like that. I’d never seen anything like it in the woods, and the timing made sense. They were leaving. Gallatin was leaving.

My chest collapsed as my breath pushed out in a heavy gush. A skinny tree helped me stand, but when I stepped forward, the earth was gone. I fell almost a foot, twisting and slamming hard into rocky ground, right on my injured hip. Another scream flew from my mouth, and tears flooded my eyes. The pain was so intense it took the wind out of me, but it didn’t match the pain in my chest.

I hiccupped a breath, desperate. “Don’t leave me.” It was a broken whisper.

No. Be strong, Prentiss—don’t give up!
Struggling to my feet, I recognized where I was. I’d stepped off the rocky ledge on the side of the hill where we’d danced that night. I was standing in front of our small creek where we’d come to swim so many times.

Limping around the water’s edge, my face contorted in pain as hot flares shot down my leg from my hip. I knew exactly the way to go, but now I could barely walk. I supported myself, tree to tree as I dragged my leg, remembering how long it had taken us to get here after Bully was born with Gallatin carrying me. Gritting my teeth, I forced myself to move faster.

When I reached the last hill, I dropped to my knees and tried to crawl up, but it only made the pain worse. I reached out for a branch to pull myself up, but it broke off and I flew back onto my side. Luckily it was on my uninjured hip this time, and the damp leaves had broken my fall. Still, I lay on my back in the darkness, wet and injured and ready to give up.

Tears streaked down my temples into my hair as I stared up at the stars. My heart beat so loudly, it drowned out all the other noises. Then I noticed what was in my hand. The broken branch.
A walking stick!

I rolled onto my side and used my good knee to climb up, and with the help of the branch, I made it to the top of the hill. From there, I could see the camp and the path below that led to the small cabins. I took a shaky breath and started down the hill, making it to the fence. Pushing through the break and leaning heavily on my stick, I limped to his cabin. The door swung open as I reached for the handle. The latch wasn’t caught.

Inside, all was dark, and as I stepped through the door and looked around the space, I saw what I’d feared. Everything was gone. The room was swept clean and empty.

Still, maybe... I turned and limped out the door again, slowly making my way toward the yard. Maybe it wasn’t too late. I set my eyes on the dining hall at the top of the rise and using the broken branch, I hobbled across the open space. The half-moon cast a dim light as I passed the small grove of trees in the center, the dark barn, and finally arrived at the screened-in building where we’d eaten, where I’d lost Flora, and where I’d found Jackson.

The screen door let out a metallic creak as I pulled it open, but the room was dark and empty. No one was inside.

“Hello?” I called. But only the short echo of my voice bouncing off the metal tables answered me. Everyone was gone.

I didn’t even enter the building. I turned and started slowly back down the hill. There was somewhere else I needed to try. If it were there, at least I’d have something to hold onto, something to remember this by, to remember everything that happened and how far I’d come.

Many painful steps later, I reached the barn and made my way past the dark, empty stalls to the door in the back. Turning the handle, I stepped into the narrow stall, but what I found made me lean forward and clutch the slats.

“Bully?”

Nothing greeted me.

The little bull that changed everything was gone.

Standing on one foot in that empty barn, I clung to the slats and broke down. I pressed my face into the wood, and allowed myself to cry. The whole place was deserted. They were gone. It was all over.

After what felt like a long time, I gave up. I was so exhausted, when I reached his small cabin at the bottom of the hill, I hobbled straight to his bed and lay down. I pulled the pillow down, and his lemony-soap smell flooded my nose, twisting the ache in my chest. Hugging my knees, another sob pulled my muscles together so hard, I thought I might stop breathing.

Finally, I couldn’t cry anymore, and like a blanket, depression wrapped around my shoulders. Almost instantly my eyes closed and I fell asleep.

* * *

I
n my dreams, I swam in the pool. I lay on the blanket in the sun and laughed as the warmth returned to my skin. I turned my head and amber eyes met mine. He smiled, and I reached out and laced our fingers. We’d never done it before, but already it felt like the most natural thing. I lifted myself onto my elbows and elbow-walked to where he was lying on his back. My face hovered over his for a few moments as he squinted up at me, then I lowered it and pressed our mouths together.