Being Celeste (12 page)

I’m actually looking forward to church
tomorrow because I have friends now. Tomorrow is mum’s church luncheon. I
wonder how grand it’s going to be because it’s always all she talks about. I
believe she, just as me, was a little inconvenienced by the
phekolo
because she had to leave planning for a day to go and attend to family
business. I’m just looking forward to showing off to the new people or youth at
church, show them that I have friends. I’ll probably be laughing a lot and
looking like I am not a total loser. Then there’s the food during the luncheon.
I’m going to be an usher along with my new friends, Anna, Tatenda and Letang.
We’ll be showing people to their seats, what ushers do. Normally ushers eat
early before the people, we need the strength. Imagine serving people on an
empty stomach, or watching them eat when you’re hungry, that’s torture. I
wonder if mum has a plan for vegetarians like me. I’ve already violated my new
culture by being forced to eat the slaughtered beast that was offered to the
gods. I’m not really complaining because I missed the taste of meat altogether.
This was probably the toughest week of my life with all the new elements
introduced in it.

Life has returned
to normal. Kate was rather ecstatic to see me on Monday morning. I think that
this was probably the first weekend we’ve spent apart in the long while. I
texted her every single moment I had a chance, during the stay in the rural
village. This is another reason why we really need boyfriends. I’m pretty sure
if she had a man in her life, she wouldn’t be jumping for joy when after not
seeing me for just three days. I don’t think she would even notice I was gone.
I’ve seen it with my other friends. As soon as they started dating, I became
less important, until we totally lost contact. I hope that never happens,
between me and Kate. I can’t imagine life without quirky Kate...why, it
wouldn’t be life at all. I wonder if she feels the same about me. I found her
in the shop, early as usual, packing away some shoe boxes. Judging by the wide
smile on her face, I figured I was missed. It must be rather lonely in the
boutique when I’m not around.

“Celeste!” she said, about to jump up and
down like a toddler on a sugar high.

It was refreshing to here my name, Celeste.
It has less baggage, unlike Seipati. At least with Celeste, I don’t feel like
such a failure, or that I have not accomplished anything. It’s a name I’m
making a mark with, for myself, not with someone who has set an example for me
to follow. My parents kept calling me Seipati the rest of the weekend after we
had returned from the village. Need I remind them that I’m Celeste? It took
them a while before it rubbed off. I guess they were still living in the
moment, seeing as everyone in the village called me Seipati the whole time.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate my given name, I just don’t feel like I’ve
lived up to its previous owner, and sometimes it depresses me that I’m a nobody
in the middle of nowhere. My great aunt was said to be outgoing and popular
everywhere she went or with everyone she met. I’ve been going to my mother’s
church for years now and I just got friends, at twenty one. Then there’s the
boyfriend thing.

“So, how was the shop, not too stressful
for you, I hope?” I asked, waltzing in like a farmer checking on their
livestock.

“Oh Celeste, I missed you so much.”

I’m still baffled as to why Kate missed me
so much. I have a feeling something amazing happened and she wants to tell me
all about it. Maybe she has a boyfriend, or potential boyfriend. Or maybe, the
makeover people have called her with good news and she qualified to get made
over. The second one sounds good. I knew she would like my sneakiness and
appreciate it. I rushed over and hugged her, and told her that I missed her too.
And I
did
miss her. I told her all about the ritual and my family, and
how Cousin Frank almost fell in the fire at night because he was so sleepy,
waiting for the meat to cook. It was probably one of the warnings from the
ancestors, trying to give us a sign about the family that’s slowly separating.
I then told Kate all about my morning at the gym. Trevor is no longer my
personal trainer and I get to work out alone. Now it’s really boring and it’s
become rather chore-like, working out alone. So I begged her, Kate, to come and
be my workout buddy. But she refused. She insists that she’s too skinny to
workout. I don’t know if she’s rubbing the slim body she has in my face, or
she’s just trying to annoy me with her shitty excuse. I even tried to bribe her
with a free lunch all week, and she still passed on my offer. I can never win
with her once she’s made up her mind and she’s got a lame excuse to back up her
decision. That evening I was going to join the Tae-bo class. It was going to be
instructed by Steve, the other muscled up trainer. I told Trevor that aerobics
was not for me, it was too safe and boring and I wanted to kick something. He
didn’t mind letting me go over to Steve’s class. Now he’s going to be stuck
with the unfit middle aged bunch. I wonder what to wear to Tae-bo. I’ve been
wearing the same outfit to gym all week. A part of me says that I’m not there
yet, the
changing outfits every day
stage. Preferably wearing those
tight gym clothes that show all my toned muscles, not now I guess. Kate won’t even
join Tae-bo with me. I give up.

“Those girls you helped out the other day
were here on Saturday, hoping for more of your expertise,” said Kate, rushing
to her normal station.

“Really?” I got a moment of satisfaction
because I was feeling wanted, I was in demand. “How come?” I asked again.

Kate was shuffling through pieces of paper,
looking for something. “Um, they said they would like to come shopping for one
of the girl’s birthday in a few weeks, and they were just wondering if you
still worked here because they valued your opinion very much.” Kate found a
piece of paper among the rest. “Here’s their number, to give them an idea of
what time you’ll be available.”

I laughed hysterically. “Why didn’t you
just tell them to come along? When I’m available? I’m not a busy person Kate!”

“Well, I just thought of us more
professional if I created an illusion that you were too busy for them, you know
it’s just business.”

“Nice one,” I said, snatching the piece of
paper off her hand. “Why don’t you call them and make an appointment?”

Kate rolled her eyes at me. I really don’t
like that habit of hers. “Geez, Celeste, I’m not a secretary.”

Suddenly, Kate’s phone started ringing. She
jumped up in surprise, because it never rang...maybe once or twice during the
day, a message from the network company with the latest promotion, but never.
I’m the only person who calls Kate. She looked at me and smiled, letting the
phone ring a little longer.

“I’ve missed my ringtone, you know,” she
said, waving it in the air.

I became impatient, from the squealing
handheld device. “Oh answer it already, would you Kate!”

“Hello?” she said, pressing her phone
gently against her ear. She was using a voice I had never heard before, non
harsh and sophisticated. When she answers my calls, it’s always as if I’m
tiring her with them. But she calls me too and I don’t answer using snappy
hellos.

I walked to the men’s shoes and started
tagging them accordingly. This was going to be a long phone call, I could see.
Kate’s facial expression was one very engaged and interested with what the
person on the other side was saying. She smiled occasionally, but she was
constantly nodding and agreeing with the person who had called her. I have
never heard so many
yes
’s conveyed in one minute. She hung up and looked
at me with a fiery stare, almost about to maul my head off my body.

“Kate,” I said softly. “Who was that? And
why are you looking at me, good news?” then it hit me, it was the producers of
the makeover show. It
must
have been them, I knew she would qualify.

“That was a man from a makeover show, which
is produced in the city,” she said, with a calm yet stern tone to her voice.
She walked over and sat on a stool next to the shoe section. “He said that I
have won a free makeover.”

I was of course, hanging at the edge of my
excitement, dying inside to reach the conclusion of her news. I don’t know why
she was stalling with such good news. I rushed up to her and started screaming
and jumping up and down. “Oh, yes! I knew it, I just knew it, Kate! You’re
getting a free makeover, yes!” I screamed with delight and joy. However, Kate
was just sitting there, like she was stuck to the stool, I took it as her way
of expressing her excitement. She couldn’t believe her luck. I would wait for
her thank you a little longer then.

She looked at me, her stare so sharp it
could pierce through my being. “So I told the nice man over the phone that I
had no idea what he was talking about, and I had never entered myself into a
makeover competition,” said Kate, turning her stare away from me, and looking
rather disappointed.

I of course felt like a knife had just
struck through my heart,
that
dramatic. I hoped she was joking, who
refuses a makeover? I would dive at the chance, except I’m not the one with a
fashion emergency. Her spontaneity today made her wear all yellow, including
the socks.

“What? Kate I-”

She cut me off. “Yes you! It was you,
Celeste. Why did you enter me into a makeover competition? What’s wrong with my
style?”

What? She did not want me to answer that.

“But you didn’t refuse it, right?” I asked,
about to fall over from disappointment.

“Of course not! When he told me I won- I
never win anything.”

“Phew! You had me there for a second.” I
reached out to her and gave her a little shake. “Don’t scare me like that, and
you scare me enough with your sunny outfits like the one today.” I passed on a
slight giggle.

“Please, don’t start! I’m just doing this
because maybe it will be fun. But I don’t appreciate you going behind my back
and doing things that involve me, without my knowledge. I like my clothes, and
my hair.”

“Oh, I apologise my Kate- my best friend in
the whole wide world,” I said, leaning over to hug her. She never stayed mad at
me after one of my hugs.

“That’s okay!” she jumped up from her seat
and whipped up a smile that exposed all of her teeth. “Because, I’m going to
the big city!” she screamed. She began jumping up and down, replacing
my
frantic jumps.

“You are, when?”

“I don’t know yet. He said he’ll call me
later to verify all the plans with me. I am going to the city, Celeste! I’ll be
staying in a hotel, and living it up!”

“And getting a makeover!” I said.

We began jumping together, in unison. This
was great news indeed.

Kate will be leaving on Friday for her makeover.
She’ll be gone all week next week. I’m going to be flying solo for a week. I
wish I could go with her. The shop is going to be boring to run all alone. She
is quite untouchable right now, almost bouncing to the ceiling and beyond with
joy. She still hasn’t thanked me yet for going behind her back and entering her
into the makeover. But I know she’ll appreciate me once she comes out looking
like a million bucks. They are probably going to teach her how to wear makeup.
I’ve always wanted to learn how to wear makeup, you know. Oh, so much is
happening in so little time. I wonder if we are ever going to have
girl’s
night out
. Last weekend I was absent one, and now Kate is going to the
city. There must be something against us having a bit of time, out in the
night. I can’t wait to see her out of her mono coloured ways.

I almost got run over by a car, thinking
about Kate. I was on the way to the gym for my tae-bo class. I hope Trevor
doesn’t think I abandoned him. We have become good friends over the past week.
He thinks of me the laziest form of human being he’s ever come across, and I
think he is an arrogant muscled up piece of work. We have an understanding, me
and him. But, this week, I’ll leave him and his butterfly imitating ways and
head for some
real
exercise, for someone as vindictive as me. I thought
that I had lost a kilogram, I don’t know, but I was so miserable when the scale
just read the same numbers. I told the lady at the reception that their scale
was broken, but she insisted it was fine. Then why did cousin Elda think I lost
some weight if I’m still 85 kilograms? Then one of the other trainers, Steve,
came rushing over to my aid, which I didn’t ask for. He confirmed that the
scale was working fine, then he began to laugh. Steve is just...gorgeous, in
his own way. Under normal circumstances if someone like Trevor came along and
began poking fun at me, concerning my weight, I would be miffed. But all Steve
has to do is flash one of his dimples and he’s forgiven. Although he’s not much
taller then I am, I would totally be stalking him, if I were still into that
business. But then again, the man is buff. I don’t think I like guys with big
muscles, they are intimidating. Oh what a contrast, a ripped man dating a blob
of fat, like me. Oh but still, those dimples. I know that I’m at a point in
life where I’m supposed to cease all this madness of feeling sorry for myself
all the time. But tell that to the image I have to endure, every time I see my
reflection in the mirror. It’s hard not to go on with the days and shove the
fact that I’m huge and I have no boyfriend at the back of my head, but I do it
anyway. However, sometimes I have to face reality and just camp at a pity party
I throw every now and then. I just can’t wait for the day to come, the day I
look at myself and admire the bitch staring back at me.