Being Jolene (7 page)

“Sorry, we’re closed,” I told the man. Sometimes this happened, people wondering in for a drink before noon.

The man gave me a suave smile as he leaned on the bar with one arm. Yeah, I never really trusted blonde men. They seemed so smug.

“I’m not looking for a drink,” he stated.

I paused. Wait. Was he hitting on me? I looked around and behind me to see if a server was standing by, maybe this was a prank. The girls were on me to find my “summer hook-up” and I wouldn’t put it past them to send this guy in to hit on their lonely boss.

“Well, lunch is being served in the dinning room and the bar opens at four. Feel free to come back then.” I turned around and went back to counting wine bottles.

“JoJo,” he said. I stopped, frozen in spot. For a second I felt like I couldn’t breathe. No one called me JoJo. Except for one person.

I slowly turned around and sat down the clipboard. I put both hands on the bar and leaned over to the mysterious blonde. “Who are you?”

He had to know something. This was no coincidence.

His suave and smug smile never left his wide face. Some would say he was handsome with classic preppy looks. If it hadn’t been for the blonde hair, he would’ve been my type. Though, right now the chills running through my body and the bad vibe I could feel in the air made me rethink of what my type was.

He stood up straight and put out his hand, “I’m Troy.”

I didn’t take his hand, but repeated my question. “Who. Are. You?”

He took his hand back and put it in his pocket. “I’m in need of your services. I would like to commission you for a few paintings. Oil paintings if at possible.”

What the fuck.

Each time he opened his mouth, I felt like I was drenched in ice. I didn’t do oil paintings anymore and there was no reason for this man to ask specifically for one.

“You need to leave,” I told him. Now. He needed to leave now because I didn’t know if this was a sick joke but I was done.

I turned away again, but his hand struck out and caught me by my arm. I snapped it away from him and looked him in the eye.

“Leave. I don’t know who you are or what you want but you need to get out.”

He sighed. “I wish I could, but I can’t. I need an oil painting. Whatever you want to paint. We would be pleased with anything, as long as it is a Jolene Hayes original.”

“We?” I said so softly I wondered if he heard me. I continued, “Please tell me who you are.”

“Hello sister,” he said, like it was no big deal.

Shock. I was lightheaded and my hands clenched the bar top as they turned white. I was taking in shallow, quick breathes. This could only be shock. He didn’t let me speak though.

“Your mother wants a painting. I’m her stepson. My dad married your mother a while back and heard you were in the area.”

I still couldn’t speak because none of this was real. The information he threw at me was not real. My mother left me when I was five and again when I was twelve. She was in Las Vegas, an anchor for the news channel there, but that was the last I had heard from her. She broke my heart twice and I wasn’t going to let her break it again.

“In the area?” I said, repeating the last of his words. We were in the middle of Idaho and pretty isolated.

“We live over the pass in Topaz.”

Topaz was the rich and snooty part of the state, where there was high class skiing. Mostly those who lived there were from California or celebrities.

“How long has my mother been married?” I asked Troy. I was on autopilot, spewing words, not really aware of what I was saying.

“Oh, I would say for about ten years. We’ve lived in Topaz for almost eight years.”

This situation was becoming too much, because if what Troy was saying was right, that meant my mother had only been a few hours away from me since I was in high school and never made any contact with me.

“Jolene,” Troy started. “I know this comes to you as a shock. The reason she isn’t here is because we thought this would be easier to handle if I stopped by-”

“No,” I stopped him, “the reason she isn’t here is because she’s a coward. She’s trying to fuck with my mind. Asking for an oil painting? That’s her playing head games. As much as you think she truly wants to reconnect with her long lost daughter? Well, it’s all bullshit. I won’t do it. She wants something from me? She better show her face rather than sending her stepson. And you’re not my brother. You’re a stranger and don’t ever forget it.”

I promptly spun around and walked out of the bar. I had no idea if he left or not, but I was all sorts of done with that fucked up situation. The rest of the shift I was in a daze, trying to make it through. My mind was a million miles away, in the past as the memory of my mother was thrown at me, catching me off guard. I knew people were talking to me, but all I saw was mouths moving. Nothing was computing in my brain. I shook my head yes and no throughout the day but really had no idea what was going on.

Finally, I was home and sitting on the couch. The sun was setting and the final rays came through my window. It silhouetted the log walls, but I sat there underneath my dark cloud, ignoring the warm rays.

My mom had been my hero, even when she broke my heart. She slept with my dad when she was the weather girl at the news station. He was the anchor and my mom was what I like to call White Trash Famous. She had grown up poor and in a trailer park, spending most of her life on her own, trying to survive. It was a story heard time and time again. She was pretty and did what she could to get to the top and out of the trailer park. I didn’t know all the details of what her parents put her through, I don’t think I ever did want to know, but I knew it was bad. She didn’t tell my dad about the pregnancy. She left the station and went to another one but then got offered a job in Seattle. She left me on the doorstep of my dad’s when I was five and then she was gone.

He was flabbergasted at the site of the dark haired five-year-old. I honestly don’t remember most of it and if it was left at that, I probably wouldn’t have held so much resentment towards her. It was later when she delivered her final blow.

Seattle didn’t work out, and when I was ten, she came back begging on her hands and knees to my dad. She filled his head with dreams of us being a family and he believed her. For those two years, she could do no wrong. She was loving towards me. We had family outings, holidays, and vacations together; it was the whole works. There was this illusion of a normal family clouding my head, setting up expectations that would soon be ruined.

I was twelve when she left again. This time for Las Vegas. A better deal came up, a new life, one without a family and she took it. When I was five, my dad didn’t even know much about my mother, but when I was twelve and she left, he was broken. How could you not be? How could you not be broken when you thought you had everything? I truly believed my dad loved my mother. She was beautiful, full of life and put on her happy face to make things look real. When she left, she crushed my dreams and left my dad a broken shell. It had taken a lot of years to put us back together. My dad never seriously dated again. I became a serial dater, never committing, knowing that I needed to be the first to leave, rather than be left.

I heard a gentle knock on my door. I stood up and walked slowly to the door, only to be surprised to see Ty standing outside. He was so ruggedly handsome. So different from everyone else. But was he? Or was it just an illusion. I couldn’t fall under an illusion again, couldn’t risk it.

“Hey,” he said as he smiled at me.

Why did I think he was anything different?

That this situation was different.

Being friends with him would only lead to something else, something that had more meaning and something that would break my heart. I had enough heartbreak in my life and if I didn’t protect it, I would end up too broken to put myself back together again.

This all meant that I needed one thing from Ty and then it was time to let him go.

Every thought running through my mind, I put to the side. I shut down every emotion I was feeling. I put away all the sadness away in my head and put on my sexy smile, the Jolene that was on the prowl and always got what she wanted came out to play.

“Hey,” I said softly. It was flipping a switch, being the Jolene I had to be in order to protect myself.

“I thought I would stop by and ask if you want to go on a run in the morning?”

I smirked. “You could’ve have texted me. It’s amazing what technology can do these days.”

He opened his mouth to say something, but then stopped and rocked back on his feet. “I wanted to see you. It gave me an excuse.”

And me an excuse to ravish him.

“That’s sweet,” I told him. “Why don’t you come in?”

I opened the door wider as he stepped in and went by me, his arm brushing mine. Even the simplest touch sent tingles down my body. It was like I had never touched a man before. It had apparently been too long since I had a good romp in bed. Time to fix that.

Ty stood and scanned over the small cabin. My bed was in view from the living room, hidden away in the small alcove. The warm flannel sheets and down comforter were in a tangle of white and tan, clearly showing my lack of tidiness.

He turned back to me and gave me a small smile. “How was your day?” he asked.

Wrong question.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Ty

It was instinct to come over here. It seemed foolish to stop by to ask a question but I wanted to see her. When I asked her how her day was, such a simple question, I saw her cringe quickly and then hide it as fast.

Instead, the face she put on was one I never had seen before. Her smile was sexy as fuck as she lowered her lashes and leaned in, putting her hand on one hip. While seduction filled her face, confusion was blatant on mine. Last I knew, I was in the friend zone, but this was definitely a look of someone who wanted her prey in bed, underneath or above, I don’t think she cared at this point.

As much as I would love to have her beneath me, those eyes trained on me as she got lost in the rhythm of our bodies, I knew this was something to approach very carefully.

“My day?” she asked me as she cocked her head, her full dark hair falling to one side. All I wanted to do was run my hands through that silky mass of hair and grab her by the back of the neck as I brought her lips to mine. She was air and I was taking deep breaths of it, falling under her spell. The desire I had for her was insane as I felt my dick grow hard. Her eyes took me in, like I was a man waiting to be devoured. Every cell in my body was telling me that was exactly what she wanted and maybe I should think twice before giving it to her.

“Yeah . . .” I said, apprehension in my voice.

“I think you’re too far away,” Jo said as she took a few steps closer to me, closing the space between us. I wanted to take a step back, but felt that would be too obvious. Instead, I held my ground.

We both stood there, her with a glint in her eyes and mine debating between lust and confusion. She took two more steps. I swallowed. Finally she was close enough to take her hand and run a single finger down my chest.

“That’s better,” she said, barely above a whisper. My breath picked up as soon as she touched me. She was only inches away from me; hiding any reaction to her was pointless.

“Do I make you nervous, Ty?” This time she wrapped her hand around my neck. Her delicate hands gently massaged the base of my neck.

Shit yes she made me nervous.

Especially now with those eyes that knew exactly what they wanted, what they hunted. And it was me, the prey, the one who didn’t know how to deal with a woman like Jo.

I was in over my head and I hated it and loved it.

I wanted to take a step back, tell her that she wins this game we were playing and that I give up, but I didn’t get the chance.

She didn’t crush her mouth against mine like I thought she would, pouncing on her prey. Instead she gently pulled me towards her. Our eyes were locked and soon our mouths joined. It was a sweet and gentle kiss. Her lips were soft and this time I would never forget it, unlike the last time when I was in the fog of alcohol.

No, I would never be able to forget this kiss. Even if meant she was giving in and knowing it would be short lived. Even if meant I could only have her for a small amount of time. It was worth it. I licked the bottom of her lip, nipping gently and as her mouth opened, I slipped my tongue in, exploring her and tasting the hint of mint and something flowery.

It was at this point that the kiss changed, became more heated. I grabbed her waist; it fit perfectly in my large hands, and pulled her even closer. It didn’t seem possible but my head was lost in her, I don’t think we could have been close enough. She moved her hands down to my waist and effortlessly, without me even thinking twice of it, she took my shirt off, up and over my head, discarded on the floor.

Her hands ran down my chest as I kissed her neck, nibbling on her earlobe. The sound she made was heaven. One I could listen to every day, a low groan that was feminine and rustic, like a country singer in a smoky bar. She slightly pushed me away to take off her own shirt, moving this along at her own pace.

Her red bra held her perfect breasts and I couldn’t help but lean down to kiss the swells of soft skin. I felt her step back, taking my hands and leading me somewhere.

It wasn’t until we fell backwards, into the soft pile of sheets that had been in a tangle when I walked in, that I wondered if this was leading to where I thought it was. My lust was taking over for my brain and I was finding it extremely difficult to put a stop to this. I looked at her and our eyes connected. Only a few moments ago I had thought about how I wanted to have Jolene underneath me, but something wasn’t right.

One of the most beautiful women I had ever seen was half naked, again, in my arms.

But she wasn’t there.

She was gone, lost in her mind.

She reached for the zippers on my pants and somehow, I don’t even know, I found myself on my back, her on top of me and undoing the bottom on my jeans.

My brain clicked in and I knew I had to stop this. I had no idea what was going on right now with her, where she was, but this wasn’t right.