Being Jolene (20 page)

***

As I drove into Boise, the traffic and stoplights all were signs I was no longer in the wilderness. I asked Jolene where we were staying. She slightly laughed as she directed me on where to go. “You know your airstream? My apartment isn’t much bigger. Hannah, Reece’s sister, has been staying there this summer until she goes back to the dorms in the fall. I told her to vamoose this weekend.”

We pulled up to the Victorian house that was split into four apartments. When I walked in I saw Jo wasn’t kidding. It was tiny, but cozy. I didn’t need much. It and in indoor bathroom and a large bed, what more did I need.

“Your bathroom trumps the great outdoors, this works great.”

Jo stood there in the tiny space and looked around. “You know, even though I don’t have a ton of stuff, it’s amazing how much I haven’t really missed it.”

“That happens. You find how little you need to live a content life.”

Jo nodded her agreement.

“Do you have a studio?” I asked her. If she did, I had no idea where it was hiding.

“No, I tend to take my pencils out and find random places to sit and stack. For my freelancing projects I do for work, I only need my laptop.”

“Do you do a lot of freelancing?”

“Yeah, I do. It helps pay the bills. I could take more on but I choose to work at June’s shop instead. I do what suits me, not needing a whole lot.”

It was a lifestyle I craved and knew well. Having only what you needed. I wanted to be able to travel and know I didn’t have to worry about little things but I also wanted a home base for Annabelle. It was a balance I was constantly working on.

“Did Reece say how he was proposing?” I sat my bag down on one side of the bed and flopped on the comfy bed.

“No, he told me to be at June’s shop tonight at seven.”

I looked and saw that gave us a few hours. I knew exactly how to spend those few hours. I pulled Jo down on the bed with me; her body on top of me had me hard almost instantly. I craved Jo in an array of ways and this was one of them, with her body on top of mine and her eyes lowered, filled with lust. I kissed her, snuck my tongue into her mouth and found hers, finding a rhythm between us as we quickly rid of our clothes. Jo broke apart from me. “You know, you’re the first man that’s been in this bed.” I raised an eyebrow at her statement. “Really?” It came out slightly sarcastic, even if I didn’t mean it that way. Luckily, Jo just gave me a smile and smacked my shoulder as she laughed. “Yes, really. I never took guys here. This was my space and I wanted to keep it as true to myself as possible.”

“And now?”

Her eyes outlined my face. “Now I want to share my space with you.”

My lips found hers as I got in her space, never wanting to leave. I found her warm and wet, my fingers sinking in and her moan giving me an answer that she enjoyed me in her space. I lifted and she took my pants off. It only took me a moment to grab a condom and I was sliding into her, finding her body ready for mine. We pushed and pulled at each other as I watched her face find that bliss, the one I gave her. Knowing that had me quickly following her and coming so hard I forgot where I was, my eyes rolling in the back of my head over the intense surge of pleasure I had never really known until I had been with Jolene.

Later, as we were getting dressed and ready, I found myself picturing Jolene standing by her small bathroom mirror and getting ready for other events together. Always together.

***

The shop Jo had talked about was actually pretty nice. It was an inviting space and I could tell Jo felt comfortable here, that it was a small part of her home. When we had gotten there, the shop had closed early but only Reece was there with friends and family. June had no idea what was going on. Reece had told June to meet him there at seven-thirty.

A younger girl came up and hugged Jolene, giving a small squeal.

“Ty, this is Hannah, Reece’s younger sister.”

The younger girl smiled at me. She was much shorter than Jo with dark shoulder length hair. I felt like “bouncy” was a good word to describe her. She talked a mile a minute, but Jo was a good sport and kept up with her. I felt someone pat me on the shoulder. When I turned around I saw Caleb standing there, a drink in his hand.

“Hey man. Didn’t expect to see you here.”

“Yeah, Jo asked me to come.”

Caleb slightly frowned and took another swig of his beer. “
Jo
asked you to come?”

I didn’t know what Caleb was trying to get at but I nodded. “Wanted me to meet her friends and family.” I thought it was a safe thing to say. Caleb glanced at Jo and then said louder, “I’m surprised you lasted this long. Usually this little minx moves on quicker than you can say-”

“Caleb!” That came from tiny Hannah. Jo lowered her eyes and I reached down to grab her hand, giving it a squeeze.

“Learn to think before speaking.” I raised my eyes at Hannah and her tone. She wasn’t messing around and I wasn’t expecting it from her bubbly personality.

Caleb rolled his eyes and walked away from us, grabbing another beer.

“I’m sorry about that. He gets a little moody.” Hannah looked at Jo when she said this, but I was sure Jo knew how Caleb could get. I had been friends with him for a few years, and I knew there was more to him than he let on. He had something deep inside him that wasn’t letting go and it seemed to affect almost every aspect of his life.

“Don’t apologize for him, Hannah.” Jo stood tall when she said it, but I wondered if this was her front. When she smiled I knew it was a front, because I had seen her real smile and it wasn’t like this. This one didn’t have the same warmth in her eyes or one dimple that showed up when she really smiled.

Hannah didn’t say anything and I wondered how well her friends really knew Jo.

“I should go talk to him.” Hannah looked to where Caleb had disappeared and excused herself as she went after him.

“Well that was awkward,” Jo said.

“It’s okay, Jo. I know Caleb. It’s not you, he’s just projecting.”

Jo sighed as she took a sip of the wine she was holding. “I think out of everyone here I know Caleb the best, which means I know his ugly side, too. That’s why I’m not mad.”

“What do you mean you know him the best?”

“I’m going to honest with you and I’m not saying it to make you jealous. It’s more for the sake of being open, so you don’t wonder.”

“Okay.”

“Caleb and I . . . if you put it down on paper you would see that in many ways we worked really well together. He told me things I know he has never told anyone. We understood each other on a different level. I can’t tell you what those levels are because it’s not my story to tell, but when it came down to it, it didn’t work. It should have worked but it didn’t.”

I took my hands and rubbed them over Jo’s bare shoulders, the sleeveless deep red dress she wore exposing her body in a sensual way Jo had mastered. “Caleb really wanted it to work.”

“Yeah and that’s hard. I was doing what I was thought was best. You can see why I’m confused because on paper, you and me, we seem to be on opposite sides of the scale. We don’t seem to work but-”

“But we do.” I finished for her, kissing her on her forehead.

Her eyes looked at me, “Yeah, we do.”

It was like the rest of the world disappeared as we stood there. It often did but this time there were more than only trees around us. Someone bumped into me and took us both out of the trance we had on each other.

Jo looked over and smiled at the guy that had walked up to us. “Reece,” she said as she gave him a big hug. “You nervous?”

Reece pulled at the collar of his shirt. “Uh . . . yes. I know she will say yes, but it is June and . . .”

Jo laughed. “You never really know what she’ll say. I get it. Well, if it makes you feel better I talked her off the cliff once already.”

Reece looked at Jo with his head cocked and his eyes narrowed. “Wait. What do you mean?”

“Um . . . well.” I tried to stifle my laugh knowing she almost told Reece that June already knew about the proposal. “You know, when she visited me she was talking out loud and wondering what would happen if you did, one day-not today, would propose. I told her it was a good idea. What a coincidence.” Jo raised a shoulder in a “what are you going to do” pose.

Reece was about to answer when the door opened and June walked in. I met June a couple times two summers ago when she worked at the lodge. A nice girl who was a little lost back then.

“What’s going on?” June asked. Her eyes never left Reece’s even with all the people in the small shop.

“I had a plan,” Reece started, both of them on opposite sides of the room. Everyone watching had quieted; their eyes glued on the two people in front of them taking the next step in their relationship. They both started to move towards each other. “I wanted to do a song and dance, like that night in the restaurant.” June smiled over the memory they must have shared. Reece continued, “But I know how we both feel about plans. That they don’t work out. So I don’t have a plan, I have a question.”

June stood there like a statue. Reece walked up to June and got down on one knee. “It’s simple June. It’s always been simple with us. Just do, don’t think. Remember?” Reece asked June. She was only able to nod but Reece grabbed her hand said, “Marry me.” Tears ran down June’s eyes. “Yes. Everyday Yes.” She answered.

Then came the hugs and the cheers and the kissing. Reece slipped a beautiful ring on June’s finger and then more kissing. I wrapped my arm around Jo and saw that she also had a few tears in her eyes. I wiped them with my hand, holding her face close to me as I kissed her gently.

“Take Reece’s advice, Jo. It’s simple. You and I simply make sense even if we don’t.”

That’s all that was said that night about it. The rest of the night was for celebration between two people who had found love.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Jolene

“It took us three days to make it back to the open land of the city. Supplies were needed. It was different, though. My heart and thoughts had been left in the mountains”–From the diary of Maggie Brown, October 1891

I didn’t know what I was more nervous about, Ty meeting my friends or Ty meeting my dad. I had never, and I mean never ever, had any of the guys I had been with meet my dad. He knew I dated but I didn’t want to bring anyone home that I knew would simply blow through our lives. We had enough of that. So yeah, I was really fucking nervous right now.

Ty took his hand and put it over my knee. “You’re bouncing your knee so hard you’re shaking the whole truck.”

I didn’t even realize I was doing that. I put my hand over Ty’s and tried to calm myself.

“Jo, deep breaths for me. Meeting your dad won’t be that bad. You have nothing to compare it to. It could be the best experience.”

That statement only made me more nervous. I had no idea what to expect. I don’t know how I missed the trip between the truck and the front door, but suddenly we were both standing there.

“You want to me to knock?” Ty asked.

I didn’t answer him but ripped it off like a Band-Aid and went into the door, pulling Ty behind me. “Dad?” I said, trying to find him.

“In the den.” The den was really our living room, but with all the bookshelves it had more of a den feeling. As I walked in I saw there was another person sitting with their back to me, my dad standing by one of the bookshelves. As the person turned around I lost whatever breath I was taking.

She was older, but I knew her. “Mom? What are you doing here? Dad, why is she here?” I was almost in hysterics and I was sure the hand that was holding Ty’s was gripping it so hard I could have broken a bone.

Both of my parents looked at me, like they were expecting an answer from me.

“Seriously. What in the living fuck is going on?”

“Language, Jo. Ladies shouldn’t swear.” This from my mother.

“Fuck you,” I said.

My mom gasped and my dad took a step forward opening his mouth but I cut him off before he even had a chance. “Why did you allow her in our home. She doesn’t belong here, not after she ruined us. She ruined you, Dad. Don’t you know? Don’t you remember how you barely fed yourself or left the house when she left us? How could you?” I was hurt. I was more than hurt, I was devastated by the betrayal I felt from my dad. It cut to the bone and all I wanted to do was curl in to Ty. I wanted to get out of this city and go to the mountains, find that peace I had never experienced before until I had moved up to Gypsum.

“Jo, this is your mother and she deserves to explain. She said she tried to contact you but you ignored her. She deserves a chance, too.”

I couldn’t even fathom the words falling out of my dad’s mouth. “No, she lost the chance when she left us. I love you Dad, but this is too much. I can’t.” I turned around and walked out. There was nothing to say. Ty was behind me, his hand on the small of my back.

I was pulling the door to the truck when I heard my dad call my name behind me. It took everything I had to let go of the door and turn around. My dad was red in the face, his eyes withdrawn and his frown apparent. “I didn’t know this would upset you Jolene. I would never hurt you like this.”

My dad would never hurt me like this on purpose. I knew it was true; we were a team that had gone through hell and back.

“Why is she here?”

“She says she wants to talk to you, that it was important but didn’t give me the details.”

I slumped against the truck, but Ty was next to me, his arm wrapped around me and holding me up. My dad’s eyes darted towards the arm around me, but he didn’t say anything. Ty untangled himself from me and put out his hand to my dad.

“I don’t think we’ve been introduced yet. I’m Ty, your daughter’s boyfriend.”

My dad was putting his hand out to Ty but when Ty had said he was my boyfriend, my dad faltered slightly. I had warned my dad I was bringing a boy over, but I guess he wasn’t prepared to know.

“Robert,” my dad said as he shook Ty’s hand. It had been a few years since my dad had gone by Bobby Mets, the most eligible bachelor and anchorman in Boise. Robert was more subdue, didn’t give his award wining smile anymore and only focused on his emotionally screwed up daughter. I hoped Ty knew what he was getting into.