Believe In Love (8 page)

Chapter 15

Graduation

Three Months Later

Amber

The last three months have been incredible to say the least.  We have gotten into a routine. Dylan and I are growing stronger in our relationship every day.  He really is an exceptional person.  He’s very loving and caring.  He treats me like a princess.  I’m in love with him.  I’m so in love with him and I don’t know how to handle the emotion.  He walks into a room and my heart swells.  I love every part of him.  I try to show him how I feel but I think I’m miserable at it.  I try to touch him often and kiss him every chance I get.  I can tell that he likes when I do it.  When we are alone, we have very passionate kissing going on but I have not pushed for more.  He is true to his word when he said that I would have to make the first move.  When I stop, he stops.  He hasn’t told me he loves me either.  I know he cares for me deeply but I’m not sure if what he feels is love.  He has broken through the walls around my heart and I couldn’t be happier.  I will say that the fear of his leaving is still there.  What if I sleep with him and then he’s gone?  What if he isn’t in love with me?  I have so many what ifs running around in my brain.

Evan and Mia love him too.  He’s great with them.  He helps them with homework and advice when they need it.  He really has been a wonderful influence with Evan.  Having him around has given Evan the example he needed on how to be a man.  Dylan isn’t filled with pride.  He believes a woman and a man run the household together.  He believes that decisions are made together and that my voice counts to him.  Although Evan and Mia were very young, they remember how my dad used to treat my mom.  She was only good to cook, clean and have babies.  He treated her like she wasn’t smart enough to handle any finances or help make household decisions.  It was sad to watch and there a million times when I wanted to tell him to shove his sexist ways, but I was also very much afraid of him.  Mia isn’t a social butterfly and tends to be very shy.  She doesn’t seem to be comfortable with her school and the other students.  She has one close friend and that’s it.  She reminds me of me and I hate that she is going through the same struggles.  Mia talks to Dylan and I and we try to give her advice and I don’t know if it has helped her.

Today is Evan’s high school graduation.  Aunt Ava and Uncle Jerry are visiting from New Orleans to attend the graduation.  They are staying at a nearby hotel and I’m grateful for that.  They abandoned me when I needed it the most and I don’t want to be in confined spaces with them for fear of not being able to control my tongue.  They invited us to have dinner at a really nice restaurant after the graduation to celebrate.  I was afraid they were going to leave Dylan out but they didn’t and were very gracious to him.  Who doesn’t like Dylan?  Claire and Andrew insisted on throwing a graduation party for Evan but he politely turned them down.  He told that that he would rather have a dinner with them than have a party with people he may never see again.  I was so proud of him for that.  It showed me the kind of man my brother is turning out to be.  So, tomorrow night we are going out with Dylan’s family.  Dylan’s family is truly phenomenal.  They are the kindest and most loving people on the planet.  I love them.  They are the true example of what a family is.  I want to be like them when I have a family of my own.  I pray that I have a life like that with Dylan.  I want him to be my life partner.  There is no one else I would give my heart to.

My aunt and uncle already picked up Evan and Mia and Dylan is coming by to pick me up.  I quickly finish getting ready.  As I’m putting the finishing touches of my make-up on, the doorbell rings.  I run to the door and open it.  There stands the most handsome man I ever seen.  He’s wearing black slacks and a gray dress shirt.  His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows.  He has a silver watch on and his arms look sexy as hell.  My mouth waters just looking at him.  His gray eyes are mesmerizing with that shirt on. 

“You look so damn sexy.  That skirt is going to drive me insane all day.”  He says and pulls me in for a kiss.  I gladly comply.  I am wearing a black mini skirt with a light blue blouse.  My hair is down and I am wearing a simple pair of black pumps on my feet.

“You look pretty sexy yourself.”  I say and he looks at me.

“Gorgeous.”  I still blush with his compliments and he smiles.  “You ready?”

“Yes.  I just need to grab my bag.” 

A minute later, we are heading out to watch my little brother take another step into adulthood.

****

A couple of hours later, we are all sitting at the restaurant.  We have all finished eating and are waiting on dessert and having idle chatter.  Evan clears his throat and everyone quiets to hear what he’s going to say.

“I just want to thank you all for being here today.  I had a hard time deciding what I wanted to do with my life.  Lucky for me, I have the best sisters in the world and they support me no matter what.”  He looks over at me.  “Amber, there aren’t enough words to thank you for everything you did and are doing for me.  You are the best and I love you so much.”  Tears swell in my eyes but I blink them away.  He continues, “I have been trying to figure out what I want to do and I have come to a decision.  I have joined the Marine Corps.”

I stare at him dumbfounded.  I am so proud of him and terrified for him all at the same time.  I stand and walk over to him.  He stands and faces me.  “I am so proud of the man you are becoming.  I am also proud of the decision you’ve made but I need to know that you’re sure.”

“I am.”  He says.  “I made sure to do all of my research before I made a decision and I believe it’s what’s best for me.”

“Then I support you one hundred percent.”

I hug him and applause erupts from the table.  He takes his seat again and I go back to my seat.  Dylan smiles at me as I sit down.  Mia catches my eye from across the table.  She’s fidgeting like she’s nervous about something.

“Mia, are you okay?”  I ask.

“I have something I need to tell you and Evan and I don’t know how.”  She admits.

“You know you can tell us anything.  Remember the rule-no judgment just resolution.”  She nods and takes a deep breath.

“I’ve decided that I want to move to New Orleans to live with Aunt Ava and Uncle Jerry.  I loved it there during Christmas and I want to go there for high school.  I have asked them and they are on board to have me live with them.  I think being there will be good for me.”

Chapter 16

Moving

Amber

I am floored.  I don’t know what to say or think about the bomb that Mia just exploded on me.  Did I really just hear her say that she wants to move to New Orleans?

“Did I do something to make you want to leave?”  I ask.  I can see Dylan and Evan looking between us and they are just as shocked.

“No Amber.  Not at all.  You have done everything for me and I’m grateful.  You know that I hate the kids in my school and I think starting a new school will be good for me.  Plus, I think I’ll have better opportunities for college there.”

“You’ve really thought this through?”

“Yes I have.  I wanted to make this decision on my own that’s why I didn’t come to you sooner.”

I look over at my aunt.  “Why now?  You didn’t care six years ago and now you’re okay with her living with you.  You are mom’s sister and you didn’t care what happened to us.  You didn’t offer any assistance and suddenly you are okay with all of this.”  I am furious at her. 

“You’re absolutely right Amber.  Your mom’s death caused me to lose myself for a very long time.  I didn’t even realize that I just left you until a year later.  At that point, you were taking care of things and I didn’t want to step on your toes.  I deserve your anger and resentment.  What happened was extremely unfair to you and I had a big part in that.  I am not making excuses or asking for forgiveness because I know I don’t deserve it.  When Mia contacted me with her idea, I thought that it was the perfect time to help out in a way where I was needed.”

I slam my hand down on the table.  Mia jumps and glasses rattle.  Evan’s glass tips over and spills all over the table.  Dylan doesn’t move but is watching my every move.  “Did you seriously think that we didn’t need any help in the last six years?  I have and still work like a dog to make sure that Mia and Evan have everything they need.  I made sure they always ate and went many nights without a meal.  You never picked up the damn phone and asked if there was any way you could help.  You are the only family we have and you disappeared for years.  You didn’t even call to see how we were doing.”  Tears are streaming down my face now.  “Why now?  What’s in it for you?”

“There is nothing in it for me.”  She wipes a tear from her face.  “You have done an amazing job with Mia and Evan.  No one could have done better, not even me.  I am proud so proud of you but now it’s time for you.  You need to start your life.”  Her eyes go to Dylan and then back to me.  “Mia made this decision all on her own.  I think it’s great and I’m all for it and so is Jerry.” 

My eyes dart to him and he nods in agreement.  I look back to Aunt Ava.  “I also have something for the three of you.  It’s something that I should have given you six years ago but I was a coward.  When the three of you were born, I opened accounts for each of you.  I have been putting money in there every month.  I should have closed the accounts six years ago and sent you the money.  I don’t know why I didn’t but I’m giving it to you now.”  She pulls three envelopes out of her purse and puts them on the table.  Each envelope has our names on it.  “Go ahead.  They’re yours.”

I motion for Evan and Mia to grab their envelopes.  They grab them up quickly and I sit back down.  Dylan’s hand comes over mine.  I wipe the tears from my face and look at him.  “Are you okay?”  He asks.

“Yes.  Just don’t let go of my hand.”  I whisper and he holds it tighter.

Evan and Mia both gasp when they open their envelopes.  They pass them to me and I look at them.  A check for twenty thousand dollars each.  I grab mine and open it to reveal another thirty thousand dollars.  I look at Aunt Ava and Uncle Jerry.  “Seventy grand?”

They nod.  “You have more because we were putting money into your account for longer than Evan and Mia.”

“Thank you.”  I say. “But, we can’t accept the checks.”

“You’re welcome and yes, you can.  I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you when you needed me Amber.”

“I’m sorry too.  I shouldn’t have lashed out at you.”  She stands and comes over to me.  “I still can’t forgive you completely but I can understand what happened.”  She hugs me tightly and I continue.  “I don’t know about the money though.”

“That money is yours.  It has been since day one.  Take it please.”

****

On the way home, Dylan places his hand on mine.  “Are you okay, gorgeous?”

I look over at him and I can’t stop the tears.  He quickly pulls the car over and wraps me up in a hug.  His strong arms around me are such a comfort.  For the first time ever in my life, I don’t feel alone.  I wrap my arms tightly around his neck and continue to sob.  “Oh baby.  I’m so sorry that you’re hurting.”  I sob harder and he holds me tighter.

Five minutes later, I start to calm and pull away.  “Thank you for being here for me.  I’m sorry that I just cried all over you.  That isn’t me.  I’m not a crier and that was hard for me but I had to get it out.  I felt like my head was going to explode.”

He places his hand on my cheek and wipes away a runaway tear.  “You never have to hide your true feelings from me.  Whenever you need to cry, scream, throw a tantrum or just throw something, call me.  I will be right there and I will hold your hand.  Hell, I might even do it with you.  You aren’t alone anymore.  You and I are a team now.”

“I’ve never had this and I don’t know how to react to it all.  It’s always been me and it many take me a while to get used to us being a team.”  I look at him and he smiles.

“I’ll remind you when you forget.”  He leans in and places a small yet sweet kiss on my lips.  “You are my forever and I promise to always be here for you.”

Chapter 17

Decisions

Dylan

Watching my gorgeous girl cry was like getting punched in the gut.  I fought for my next breath every time a tear fell.  She got hit with a few blows today and I don’t know how to help her deal with them all.  She deserves so much happiness when her whole life has been filled with sadness.  I need to find a way to put a smile on her face.  She smiles all the time but it doesn’t reach her eyes.  Her blue eyes are always weary and expecting the next disaster to happen.  The last six years have been hell on her but she’s a force to be reckoned with.  I am so proud to have her by my side.

We walk into Amber’s house to find Mia and Evan sitting at the table waiting for us.  Amber sits down.

“I’m going to get going.  This is family time and I’m going to let you guys talk.”  I say and turn to go when Amber stops me.

“Please stay.  I need you here.”  I nod and sit next to her.  Amber takes a deep breath and starts the conversation.

“First, I have a question and I want an honest answer.  Mia, did I do something to make you want to leave?”  Mia looks shocked that Amber would even consider something like that.

“Of course not.  You have done everything for me and I would never repay you like that.  You are an awesome big sister and I don’t know what I would do without you.  I love you so much.  It also isn’t fair to you to have had to raise us.  You don’t do anything without us and I hate that.  You don’t have your own time.”  A tear falls down her cheek and she quickly brushes it away.  “During Christmas time, I met a few girls that live around our aunt’s house.  They are very sweet and down to earth.  They showed me around and I quickly came to love the city.  Aunt Ava only had good things to say about these girls and I immediately felt comfortable there.  You know that I’ve always been an outcast here.  I didn’t want to start high school with the same people that I’ve despised for the last few years.  So now I want to go someplace different.  When I asked Aunt Ava what she thought, she was truly happy to have me and I know that now is my chance.  I am still in touch with those girls and we have so much in common.  It is going to hurt like crazy to leave you but it will be good for the both of us.”

“Although I think you should have discussed this with Amber first, I agree that this might be a good decision for you.”  Evan says and Amber looks at him.  “I know you have been miserable at the school you’re in and Amber has done the best she can.  I agree that now is the time to make a change.”  He looks at Amber now.  “I agree with Mia that now is your time.  We are so blessed to have a sister like you. We are who we are today because of you and I don’t think anyone could have done a better job, not even mom and dad.  You taught us the meaning of true love and we can’t thank you enough.”

Amber looks down at her hands and I can see a tear roll down her cheek.  I place my hand on both of hers and she wraps one hand around mine. 

“I love you both so much and I am so proud of you.  You both are very smart and independent.  I respect both of your decisions and I will not get in your way.  I need you to promise me that if you are not happy or things aren’t working out the way you want, you’ll come back and ask me for help.  I will always be here for the both of you.”

“I promise.”  Mia says.

“I promise.”  Even says.

She nods her head and Mia rushes over to hug her.  Evan follows and the three of them sit there for a long moment embracing.  I am extremely proud of these two kids.  Not only are they thinking of themselves but they are thinking of their sister too.  I am in such awe at them.

When they pull away, Evan looks at me and smiles.  He looks back at Amber and says, “I need you to promise me something now.”

“Anything.”

“Be happy.  Have fun.  Let Dylan love you and you love him.  You deserve it all.”

“I promise.”  She says and turns to look at me.  I wink at her.

For the next hour, we speak about when Mia and Evan are leaving and planning their moves.