Bella (23 page)

We
managed to get a very small flat and were blissfully happy. But with both of us
working and me doing my law degree, we were like passing ships in the night. It
was difficult to find time to be together.

I met
your mother at the bar where I worked. She came in one night asking for a job.
I remember her lovely long blonde hair and blue eyes. Her smile knocked me
back.
Because we were working
together, we became really
good
friends, and I fell in love with her. After a year of knowing her, I knew I
wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I still loved Tammy, but the
spark we once had, seemed to have gone. Tammy was devastated by the news, and
left the next day.

I
didn`t know she was pregnant with Ben, maybe if I had known, I would have
stayed with her.

Tammy
apparently returned to her parents and I was forbidden to ever contact her
again.

I
married your mother and we found a small cottage and decided we wanted a family
straight away. But Sarah couldn
’
t get pregnant; tests confirmed that I had a low sperm count, so we
decided to adopt a child. The process was gruelling, but eventually we were
accepted.

When
I passed my honours degree we decided to buy a bigger house.
 
Times were still hard but we managed.
This was the house where you children were brought up.
 
We were told we would probably have to wait years for a baby, but
we didn
’
t care. One year later, out of the blue we were contacted by the
adoption agency, asking us to go and see them ASAP. We were told that there
were two children, Simon was only a month old, and Lizzie had just turned one.
Both children were placed into care, as they had been neglected. Their mother
Barbara Stanford was only seventeen when she had Lizzie, then followed Simon.
But their father was a drunk.
 
After Simon was born, child services got involved. Their mother
was very upset but their father didn
’
t put up a fight.
 
The papers were signed, for both Lizzie and Simon to be placed
with a better family. Simon and Lizzie's mother was a very wealthy woman.

Their
grandmother didn't want their daughter Barbara and her Sister Caroline to have
the money. All I know is Barbara was sectioned and taken into a
psychiatric hospital. We didn
’
t really know the real
story. Your mother Sarah and myself love all of you children
dearly. When your mother and I met Lizzie and Simon we fell in love with them.
immediately. We couldn
’
t have loved you both more if you had been our own. We never even
imagined that Sarah would fall pregnant. However, when Lizzie had just reached
three, and Simon was two years old, your mother discovered she was pregnant, we
couldn
’
t believe the news. All through her pregnancy we thought something
might go wrong. But our darling daughter Bella was born on Christmas Eve and we
became one big happy family. We didn
’
t see the need to tell you that you were not blood related, as far
as we were concerned you were. We were not going to tell any of you. But we
both noticed Bella and you Simon had feelings for each other, and not like a
brother and sister should. So we were going to tell you at a later date. I
wrote this letter just in case we were not here ourselves to tell you. Please
don
’
t be angry with us. We loved you children dearly.

            
All our love mother and father

   I couldn
’
t believe what I was reading.
 
All I could think about was all the years I had
loved my brother Simon, given birth to his child and the anguish we had gone
through with the blackmail from Marco

At the bottom of the letter there was more.

Obviously
you will find the other letters enclosed one written to you Bella. And one for
Ben the son I never got to know.

What letters?
Of course this wasn
’
t the original. They
were burnt in the fire.

I had to find the other letters. I knew one thing, I couldn
’
t tell Simon now. He had not long got over a
breakdown. I had to keep this to myself. I went to Roy
’
s bungalow and told him there was something
important I needed. I hoped that it was  still in the filing cabinet.

Roy told me to sit down, have a coffee, and tell him what
the problem was. How could I just blurt out everything I knew...? I told him
that there was something very important I needed.

I finished my coffee, and began frantically searching for
the missing letters,
surely if this letter was a rough copy, then surely I
would find copies of the others
. I eventually found them and decided to
read them there and then.

CHAPTER TWELVE

 
To our Darling daughter Bella

Obviously
you know by now that Lizzie and Simon are not your real brother and sister, and
you have also discovered that you have a half-brother Ben. I have never been
good at saying what I want to say face to face. I found writing you this letter
more appropriate. I love all of you with all my heart and hopefully will get to
meet my long lost son. You are the apple of my eye Bella;
as soon as you were born I felt this
overwhelming love for you. Please don
’
t be angry with me, your mother has passed away, she wanted you to
know years ago, and so did I.

When
we could see how close you were to Simon, we knew you had a different kind of love
for each other, not like a brother and sister should. As I
’
m getting married again, it
’
s time for you to know the truth. Also, you are not too old to
decide what you want to do with your life; you know what I
’
m talking about Bella. I know Simon loves you too and whatever you
both decide I
’
m with you all the way. Your mother would have wanted you to be
happy, the same as I.

Your Father

I decided not to read the letter to Ben, after all it was
personal. I felt guilty enough that I had read Simon and Lizzie
’
s letter.

After I went to sit with Roy and find out if he knew
something. I wasn
’
t sure if maybe Tammy
had told him things.

He made me some
coffee, and gave me some toast. But I couldn
’
t
stomach anything.

  
“
Do you know anything?
”
I asked Roy.

Scratching his head
he sat down next to me and began telling me.

  
“
Bella there are so many things you don
’
t
know and believe me I'm not sure you are ready to know everything.
”

Somehow I knew there
were more hidden skeletons in the closet. But was I ready to find out.

Roy gave me a hug
and told me to go and have a lie down. He called Claudio to say where I was. I
knew he must have been frantic with worry.  

I was shattered but
somehow I felt at peace.

  
The news wasn
’
t exactly what I had expected but I knew that at least Simon and I
hadn
’
t committed any sins and the feelings we
’
d
both had were normal.

I felt much better
when I woke up. Roy made me something to eat. I must admit I was feeling rather
hungry as I munched on my cheese on toast.

Back at home later
that evening I couldn
’
t shake off what Roy had said.
What other news could there
possibly be
? I thought.

I decided to tell
Victoria that I had read the letter, and that it hadn
’
t
changed anything.

Simon was away
visiting friends so when Lizzie came in with Victoria she looked at me and
guessed something was up.

  
“
What
’
s up Bella? I know that look.
”

I sat down.
 

“
I have read the
letter from dad Lizzie.
”

Victoria
’
s face reddened.

I began reading it to
Lizzie. I didn
’
t want to look at her reaction.
What if she doesn
’
t want to know me anymore?
I was
thinking. After all we are not related. Lizzie must have known what I was
thinking.

  
“
Don
’
t look so worried Bella, this news means nothing to me, apart from
the fact I have another set of parents out
there.
”
Lizzie laughed and then went on to say.
“
Well
at least Ben wasn
’
t my brother when I was dating him all those years back after all.
That makes me feel much better. 

I was wondering
whether it was the right time to talk to Lizzie about Simon and me. But in the
end I decided it was best kept unknown for the moment.

  
“
Would Simon want to know the truth?
”
I
asked Lizzie.

  
“
To be honest Bella he should know the truth. You told me Bella. I
think Simon would accept the news the same as me.
”

I then asked Lizzie
if she thought less of mother and father for not telling them all those years
ago.

   
“
I love mother and father for giving us a loving family home and a
loving sister.
”

Victoria said she
didn
’
t think it was a good idea to tell Simon, but I knew her reasons
why.

  
“
If you tell Simon, I think the news could push him over the edge.
”

She was probably
right and I didn't want to upset Simon more than I had to.

   Roy phoned and
told us all to go over the next day because he thought it was time we all heard
the truth about everything.

Sitting in his
living room, I felt nervous. I didn
’
t want any more earth
shattering news.

   Roy sat down
opposite me and Claudio; Lizzie sat on the sofa by the window. Simon was still
away visiting friends.

I decided that day I
was going to tell Simon. Lizzie said it was better to give him the letter to
read and take the news in himself.

Roy looked at each
of us, and said,

   
“
Basically the news I have is more about you Bella. But what I am
going to tell you might shock you. When I met Tammy, it wasn
’
t a coincidence. I came for a reason, and the reason was you.
”

   
“
Why me, I don't understand?
”
Roy took my hand.

   
“
Many years ago, I knew your mother Sarah. Your father was working
for me. I got on well with them both. But I fell in love with your mother. Your
father left her alone a lot with Simon and Lizzie when they were little. Back
then your father liked a drink, especially a whisky after work. One day I went
over to your house, and I could hear raised voices. I remember walking away,
but then I heard Sarah scream. I had to knock the door and interrupt them.
Sarah had a big bruise on her arm.

Ted was very
stressed at work; but he had no excuse for hitting your mother. She told Ted to
move out for a few weeks. I popped in sometimes to see if she was ok and if she
needed anything. I often kept her company.

   One day, she and
I both had a little too much to drink. I
’
m
not going to go through too many details. You can probably all guess what
happened after. Anyway to cut a long story short she took your father back and
told me to stay away. I decided to change companies where I worked. I was
offered a higher post in America. That
’
s where I became very
successful in my own right.