Beta (3 page)

"Let me adjust to
Christian first," I said nervously.

I didn't give him
a chance to respond before I got up to finish dinner. I sprinkled a
little hot sauce in the pan and stirred everything around. What if
I never felt ready for kids? I didn't have much of a choice since
Christian was already in the picture.

I pulled out
plates and silverware and started piling up a plate for Titus
before serving myself. I couldn't believe I felt anxious giving him
his plate but I did. I sat and carefully took a bite. Out of the
corner of my eye, I watched as he took his first bite though I'll
admit, I was more focused on his features once I looked at him. He
really was perfect and I wondered how more women hadn't thrown
themselves at him. Maybe they had but he didn't go for them. I
noticed a light scar just under his left ear and running down to
disappear under his shirt. I wondered how he got that. It must have
been horrible because usually wolves don't scar.

"This is amazing,
Elizabeth," he commented, "Where did you learn to cook?"

"Taught myself,"
I said with a light smile. I doubted he knew exactly how much his
opinion meant to me and it would probably be best to keep that to
myself for now.

"Of course you
did. What else have you taught yourself?"

"Everything," I
said a little uncomfortable.

I didn't like
talking about all the things I taught myself because it meant I had
to talk about my family. That was not something I really wanted to
discuss at the moment.

"Everything?" He
asked skeptically.

I set my fork
down, feeling my nerves go haywire. He had a right to know how I
grew up and what led me to be the way I am.

"My parents
abandoned pack life right after I was born for a religious cult. I
was raised in a setting that did not allow it's members to read or
write so any child born into the cult was illiterate. My parents
sent me to stay with my brother on weekends so no one could accuse
them of cutting me off from the pack and when I was with him, I
took his daughter's books and taught myself how to read and write.
When I was about seven, I would go to the junior college and just
read on every subject I could. I had mastered Shakespeare by nine
and animal physiology by ten."

I looked over at
him to gauge his reaction to my story. There was nothing glamorous
or proud in my childhood. I hadn't grown up in a loving home. I
only had Adrian and that was because I secretly taught him how to
read and write. We were close because we helped each other survive
as children.

"So how did you
end up here and in college?" He asked. I could sense he was masking
a great deal of anger listening to my childhood but he wanted to
know.

"My parents...um,
they knew something bad was going to happen and they sent me to my
brother's... three days later, they were dead. I was almost eleven
when it happened and when I took the standardized tests to see what
grade I should be in, I tested at a college level. I was put in
specialized classes and graduated high school just before I turned
fifteen and went to college."

I ended my
emotionless tale and went back to eating. I knew it would look odd
if I didn't cry or feel bad about the situation but I had worked so
hard to lock away that part of my life, I wasn't going to let this
crack that open. Perhaps some day I would allow myself to grieve
the loss of my childhood and parents but I had too many other
things to focus on.

"That is...
that's an amazing history. It certainly explains a lot."

"Like
what?"

"The OCD,
the-"

"I do not have
OCD. I just happen to know that everything has a place and time and
that without order, things fall apart."

A teasing smile
played on his lips, "Whatever you say, Elizabeth."

I heard his phone
ringing but he seemed to ignore it in favor of looking at
me.

"Aren't you going
to get that?"

"You don't
mind?"

"No. Could be
important."

He answered his
phone so I took the opportunity to clean up the dishes and start
the dishwasher.

He sighed,
"Sorry, but Christian won't stop crying. I'm going to see if I can
calm him down."

I turned back to
him and nodded as I dried my hands.

"You could come
with me if you want," he offered, "No pressure though."

I chewed on my
lip, thinking. I wasn't sure if I was ready to meet Christian yet
but I guess now is as good a time as any. I looked down at what I
was wearing a remembered I was still in running attire.

"Do you mind that
I'm dressed like this?"

He offered me a
half smile, "You're beautiful in anything, I'm sure."

I couldn't help
but blush a little at his comment but if he thought I looked fine,
then I was fine.

"Okay, well, lets
go," I mumbled.

His smirk widened
a bit, "After you."

*******

We walked the
half mile to the giant pack mansion he was staying at. I had only
been here for pack meetings even though they never concerned me.
Only high ranking families lived in the pack house and I was not
part of that society.

He held the front
door open for me and followed me into the grand foyer. I followed
him up two flights of stairs to a solid wood door that he didn't
hesitate to open. A young woman, maybe in her late twenties,
cradled a hysterical baby in her arms though she didn't look very
happy about it.

"He's doing it
again," she complained, clearly exhausted by Christian.

I listened to the
way he was crying and took note of his clenched fists and curled up
legs.

"Does he do this
a lot?" I asked.

"Same time every
day for about an hour," Titus responded, "The doctor said there's
nothing wrong with him and he just misses his mother."

I cocked my head
to the side as I watched the girl pass son to father. Christian
didn't let up even when Titus tried to comfort him.

"He's two months,
right?"

"Yea," Titus
responded though he was clearly distracted.

"Do you mind if I
try something?" I asked.

He shook his head
and handed Christian over to me. I tried to block out the
hysterical cries from the baby in an attempt to concentrate. I
placed my hand on his stomach to feel a tight abdomen just as I
thought.

"Colic," I mused,
"Can we get a warm bath going?" I asked.

Titus looked over
at the girl and she rushed to the bathroom as I laid Christian on
the bed to undress him. I felt Titus watching me silently but he
let me take control of the situation. Christian wailed the entire
time I undressed him and carried him into the bathroom. I tested
the water before I slipped him into the water. For a few minutes, I
lightly rubbed his stomach in the warm water and he started to
relax. I was a little afraid it wouldn't work at first but as his
crying subsided, the adult tension in the room faded as
well.

"What did you
do?" The girl asked, relieved.

"Well, no one
really knows what causes colic and it's often misdiagnosed. There's
no medicine or apparent triggers for it but sometimes it can help
to rub the stomach in warm water. It relaxes the muscles," I
explained as I still lightly rubbed his stomach.

Titus ran a hand
through his hair as he sat at the edge of the tub. The girl shook
her head absently and left the room.

"How did you
know?" He asked.

"I read a book
about infant diseases when I was twelve."

"Of course you
did," he said with a light laugh.

I smiled lightly
and finally really looked at Christian. He looked a lot like Titus
but his eyes were a chocolate brown instead of the warm hazel of
his father. His cheeks were chubby and almost as pale as me but
still holding true to his father's sun kissed color. I had to
admit, he was a really cute baby.

Christian started
splashing the water and laughing. He grabbed my hand every so often
but quickly released it every time.

A light knock on
the already open door pulled my attention to a stern looking man I
assumed to be Titus's Alpha. I instantly averted my eyes and
slightly bowed my head in respect for a visiting Alpha.

"Zac, this is
Elizabeth, my mate. Elizabeth, this is Zac, my Alpha."

"It's nice to
meet you, Alpha," I said respectfully.

"You don't need
to be formal around me," he said lightly, "You're my Beta's mate.
That makes you family."

I smiled lightly
at him, finally looking at the man that was my future Alpha. He was
typical of an Alpha, strong, handsome, well built but in my
opinion, no comparison to Titus.

"Congratulations," Zac said to Titus.

"Thanks."

"Crying again?"
Zac asked though he already knew the answer.

Titus nodded but
glanced at me, "He was but she stopped it."

"Really?"

He nodded, "She's
about to graduate from medical school. Turns out, she's a
genius."

"Medical school,
huh? You don't look a day over eighteen," Zac commented.

"I'll be
twenty-three in a few weeks," I said as I took Christian out of the
bath.

Titus handed me a
soft towel, "I'm not just saying that. She's a member of
MENSA."

"Oh. So literally
a genius."

Titus nodded,
"She wants to be a pack doctor."

"That would
actually work well since we're absorbing Dark Moon," Zac
mused.

"I have another
month left in school and I would still need to work with a pack
doctor before I could work on anyone," I cut in,
"Diapers?"

Titus motioned to
the bedroom, "By the bed."

I left the men to
get Christian changed and dressed. Being a wolf, he wouldn't get
too cold but I didn't want to take any risks. His big, milk
chocolate eyes watched me curiously as I moved him to one arm and
reached for the diapers at the same time. Apparently I needed to
grow an extra arm to handle a child. I laid him down, put a diaper
on him, and redressed him. He looked sleepy so I sat on the bed
with my legs crossed and pulled Christian into my arms. I was
surprised at how natural caring for a baby came to me. I had never
been around children and I had never held a baby so this was all
new to me.

Within minutes,
he was fading to sleep and Zac was leaving the room with a light
wave at me. I smiled lightly, not wanting to wake
Christian.

Titus sat next to
me mostly watching Christian but his attention never fully left
me.

"You're really
good with him," Titus said low in my ear.

His close
proximity sent goosebumps all over my skin. I can't believe I
hadn't noticed how good he smelled until he was this close. It was
masculine and clean, almost like a fresh rain and all too
tantalizing. Even though I didn't want him to stop, he made me
nervous. I couldn't control how he made my body react and that
scared me. I never wanted to lose control of my life or myself. I
had worked too hard and too long to gain control of my life and I
couldn't ruin that.

"Thanks," I said
awkwardly.

I heard him laugh
lightly as he rested his forehead on my shoulder. I loved the way
skin to skin contact felt with him. I felt unbelievably complete
with him near me and when he touched me, it was like nothing else
mattered.

"I love that
you're so innocent."

"You do?" I asked
nervously.

He met my eyes
like I was crazy for thinking otherwise, "Why wouldn't I? I'll be
the first and the last man to ever touch you."

"But I mean...I
don't... I won't know what I'm doing," I said so quietly I wasn't
sure he heard.

Usually if I
didn't know something, I just read about it and retained the
information but this wasn't exactly something I could just read
about. I hated to admit I didn't know how to do something but I was
really lost in this arena.

"Elizabeth," he
said as he placed a finger under my chin. I let him guide my
attention to his eyes, searching for something.

"You are
perfect," he said with such conviction I damn near believed him,
"Everything you do will always be perfect. I am happy you have no
experience with men. That means that everything you experience will
be with me."

He really
believed I was perfect, didn't he? Something about his statement
was assuring. His approval was all that mattered to me which was so
unlike me.

"You think so?" I
asked.

"I know so. I
only wish I had done the same."

I nodded absently
and looked down at Christian, "Well, think about it this way, you
have Christian now and you wouldn't have had him if you
waited."

He smiled at me,
"See? You are perfect."