Bete Noire (36 page)

And when Lucien’s fire nearly killed her, she vowed to never be this weak again, to frighten Tristan with her near death. She would make him strong and together they would be able to stop anyone. The moment he woke, she was going to offer him what he wanted. But that was all gone now, knowing the things Lilith had told her. Could she
really be the one to set such a fate into motion?

“Asta-chan,” Yuki said in a tiny voice, on the verge of tears. “I never meant to hurt you.”

“But you always do, Shisho. It is just who you are.”

“No…” she whispered, the word trembling with her pain.

“Please, just leave. I need time to think.”

Yukihime considered her for a long time before finally nodding. “Okay… Just—”

“Yes?”

“Just remember… there isn’t much time now.”

Ash frowned at her. “I know.”

“Would it… would it help to speak to Lilith again? I mean, to hear it more clearly? I’m sure she’d let you bite her and then you could see it all, the big picture.”

Ash made a rude noise, shaking her head. “You just do not learn, do you? No, Yukihime of Water. No, I will not drink from the pythia and watch the reel of fate unfold. No one but the pythia is meant to know that. Shame on you for tasting it.”

Yuki’s frown stretched as she nodded, accepting Ash’s scolding. She knew Ash was right, but just couldn’t help herself. She loved Ash so very much, why couldn’t she see that? Everything she ever did was to protect those she loves.

“I’ll see you in Japan,” Yuki said hopefully and when Ash didn’t respond, turned away with her head lowered in shame. “
Ja na
,” she whispered casually. She wasn’t ready to say
sayonara
to Ash, not just yet. She had to believe things could be mended between them.

In the other room, Ash could feel Tristan stirring, his thoughts starting to become more coherent as he rose out of his sleep. The blood he drank earlier was still working strong on him and he felt Yuki’s presence even if he didn’t realize it was the old vampire herself.

“Wait.”

Yukihime’s expression lit up like a kid on Christmas morning when she spun to face Ash.

“I need you to do something before you go.”

“Yes!” She rushed forward and reached for Ash. Yuki came to a hard stop when Ash pulled away from her, but kept a cheerful expression on her face. “Anything.”

“I want you to go in that room and erase what Sebastian did, just as you offered. And one more thing.

Yuki looked so eager to please, it was just sad.
“Yes?”

“
Tristan, he—you fed him your blood that night we awoke to you in our room. Did you not?”

Yukihime looked ashamed
. “Yes.”

“Fine. Since that was your meddling again, I need you to erase that from his mind.”

“Can I… ask why?”

Ash dropped her arms to her side. “After you left, something happened and he attacked me. He almost could not remember who he was. And then, to kill Lucien, he drank my blood and it… changed him. He managed to hold on to more of himself, but it frightened me, the monster he was
, just to kill Lucien.”

Yuki let out a shocked laugh. “I knew it. I knew it! So he did it on his own, is it? Oh, you have to let me see.”

“Yukihime,” Ash warned, shaking as the neat little ball of volatile fury inside her started to unravel. It’d been some time since she last let her fury free. Even as angry as she was with Yukihime, now was not the time.

Yuki frowned, shoving her hands behind her back to keep from reaching for Ash again. “
It’s his nature. I can’t take instinct from him.”

Ash took an angry step towards Yukihime. Mixed in with her own memories were a few that were not her own, a few that “accidentally” slipped through. “You knew all along of Lucien’s planned betrayal. You knew of his plan to lure Tristan away from you in hopes of stealing him from you, because everyone
apparently
believes that he belongs to
you
—oh and I am sure that is an interesting story. You knew that Sebastian believed Lucien when he said that his sister, Sybille, was killed by you and that if he helped Lucien capture Tristan then the three of them would kill you.”

Yuki gave a sheepish little shrug but denied none of it.

Ash actually felt bad for Sebastian, even though she still meant to follow through and kill him. He had to pay for what he’d done.

“You played right into
Lucien’s game just so that you could…” Ash made an aggravated gesture. “
Nudge
Tristan into the right direction, the one that would be the most use to you. He did not know it on a conscious level, but we both know what you did to him that night before we left Japan. You gave him your blood and it turned on something within him so that when Desmond attacked him, he could fight back. Desmond could have tried harder to kill him, but even at the level he fought, Tristan should have died. A human would have died.”

“Ah, but Ryōshi-san’s no human now, is he?”

Ash lifted her chin. “Not in the least.”

“That’s right. He’s Uruwashi… and so much more.
You have to help him understand who he is. That’s why I gave you those memories back. You have to guide him, teach him.”

“No. I am not
trying to make him anything, you are. If you had just let things lie, everything would have worked out as they were meant to. You messed with the flow of fate too many times. Now, you made this particular mess, you fix it. I will come to terms with my role on my own, in my own time. And if you try to interfere again, in any way, I will kill you myself. Am I understood?”

Yuki nodded solemnly, feeling like a scolded child who got in the cupboard and ate all the cookies. “Hai.”

“Good.”

MMM,” Tristan hummed. There was nothing like waking up to the scent of sweet oranges and the cold burn of vampire in his blood. It was nice to wake up at all.

“Ash…” He reached out. His embrace was matched with familiar arms, arms he wished would forever reach for him in return and hold him.

“How are you?” she asked with a gentle smile.

“
Ohhh,” he groaned as he gave a little stretch feeling his body. All of his muscles ached and his voice was scratchy and rough. Puking last time he woke up didn’t help his throat feel any better. At least his stomach was empty now and didn’t hurt anymore… then again, why was he sick? Was the food Sebastian gave him while locked up bad? That was the last thing he remembered eating before that soup Ash forced on him. Something didn’t seem right though.

Ash’s face emptied of emotion, not liking the thoughts she was hearing from Tristan. Even in her weak state, she could hear him so clearly. There was a good reason for that now, she realized. A small—
very small, mind you—part of her almost wished Yuki hadn’t given back all her memories. The things she knew now… How was she ever going to tell it all to Tristan?

“I’ve felt worse. How long?”

“Just the day.”

Tristan hummed in consideration. Either he wasn’t hurt so bad or he was getting better at this whole vampire hunting/not dying thing. Then again, besides a few aches and bruises, he couldn’t remember actually getting cut. Just
exactly how did he overpower Lucien?

“Off with his head,” Ash said dryly, an eyebrow quirked.

He frowned to himself in thought. Oh, that sounded right…
right
?

“How are you?” he asked with a little wince. He remembered her skin being bad, and while it wasn’t as dark as it had been last time he saw her, it still looked painful.

Ash sat up. “I will live.”

“Your hair…” He reached up and touched the side of her head.

She frowned a little. “Does it look bad?”

“What? No. Not at all, it’s just different. I like it.”

Ash pursed her lips together. She hadn’t seen her new haircut just yet and was a little afraid to. Her appearance had been the same for so long that it was like a security blanket to her fragile sensibilities. It was the one thing about her life she could control, the one thing that was always a comforting constant. Now everything had changed.

She met his eyes, looking serious.

“What’s wrong?” he asked softly.

“I used to believe I knew exactly who I was.
”

Tristan frowned, wondering where that came from.

“Then a man came into my life and forced me to understand I was never that person… forced me to understand my true nature. And, for a time, I was okay with who I was as a vampire. But then that man used me, betrayed me. I became convinced that I never really was the person he showed me after all. For a third time in my life, I was remade. And then again and again. Years—
decades
of reinventing myself.”

Tristan sat up across from her, hands in his lap as he listened to her talk solemnly.

“But now, all of that, I realized, was only the teenage years of my life, my time of self-discovery. I spent centuries blundering around trying to discover who I was. And now, now I know who am I… all because of another man who forced himself into my life. And my heart.”

Tristan felt a surge of something electric and reached out to take her hand. “That was an awfully long way to say
I love you, you know.”

Ash smiled, cupping his cheek. “Oh, but I do.
I do love you. More than I have ever loved another.”

Even Lyandros?
crossed his mind but he had enough control to not say it aloud. But then, with a vampire for a lover, it didn’t matter what he said and didn’t.

“Yes,” Ash whispered, leaning into him for a kiss. “Even more than my human husband.”

Tristan scooped her up and pulled her against the front of him as she tossed her arms around his neck and kissed him. The contact hurt every inch of burnt skin but the pain was the price she paid to save his life. It was worth it, and more.

“What happened to him?”

“He left for the war on Crete and never returned home. But it was not the Ottomans who killed him.”

“
Lemme guess…”

“Mhm,” she hummed. “Malik.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Thank you, but I must say, I am glad that it was you who helped me rid this world of that man. I would not have had it any other way.”

“Oh god,” he groaned and pulled her closer. His idea of pillow talk had changed dramatically since meeting Ash. “I love you so much,” Tristan whispered as he kissed his way along the smooth side of her neck. “You can’t imagine how terrified I was when I thought you’d died. You
were
dead, I just…” His voice broke and he couldn’t finish his words.

“
Shhh,” Ash comforted him, holding him tight. Holding an Uruwashi in her arms. But there was no fear, only acceptance. This man, he wasn’t—couldn’t be one of
those
Uruwashi. He was too good. “I am here.”

“What now?” he asked in a tiny voice. Images of Ash dying, being burnt alive were seared into his memory. He’d never forget.

“Pardon?”

He scoffed. “Ugh, don’t say that.”

“Say what?” she asked with a smile, knowing perfectly well what he meant.

He shrugged his shoulders as if he was trying to shake something from them, something creepy. “I think I’ve had enough French, thank you very much.”

She smirked at him, eyes shimmering. “That is a shame.”

“Shame?”

“I was thinking we could spend some time here, have a real vacation. It is the city of love and I do love you…”

“And I’m happy to hear that, but…” He put on a sad smile. “Then what, big picture?” That’s what he was trying to ask before she changed the subject. “Where do we go from here?”

Ash’s smile slipped. Tristan seemed down, his mind full of dark thoughts and all she wanted to do was prove to him just how much he meant to her. “And then we live our lives together in happiness.”

He frowned, considering her for a moment. “Happiness involves truth.”

She frowned in return. “Yes, of course, you are right. Tristan I, there is so much to tell you. By the Goddess, I… I have so much I want to say to you.”

“I’m listening…”

Ash opened her mouth, but no sound came forth. She shut it again with a frown.

Tristan said, rolling to his back. “You can’t can you?”

“Lilith is my niece.”

Tristan sat up too fast and went dizzy. “She’s
what
?”

Ash nodded, looking pensive. “Not in vampire terms of family, but a real blood relative. Lilith is my sister’s daughter.”

“Oh my god, Ash… I don’t even…” He was too stunned to finish his words. He didn’t know what to say to that. “You…”

Hearing the thoughts he couldn’t form words to, Ash smiled softly. “No.
I am not a pythia, nor was I ever a pythia.” Sounded more like a legal statement than an explanation.

“
So then how—?”

“The pythia are genetical
ly immune to the vampire virus. But when twins are born of a pythia, one will always be a null—unable to kindle pythia magic. Genetically human. I was the null.”

“You… you’re a
twin
?” And Lilith, the one who’s been heralding Tristan’s coming was her niece… “Jesus… I mean…” He looked her in the eye. It was all too much to take in and he decided to stick with the simple stuff until his mind could work it all out. “What was her name, your sister?”

She smiled
faintly, gaze fixed off on some unseen object. “Evangeline—Eva, I called her.”

He smiled back at her. “I can see it, if she looked just like you. A beautiful name for a beautiful person.”

She gave a little laugh shaking her head. “I would often argue with her that we should have been named the other way around. She was the star between us, the one gifted with the true power of foresight. I… she knew what was to come, but kept it from me. I am sure of it now. She kept the truth from me to spare me and she suffered alone for it.”

“Where is she now?” he asked gently, already knowing the simplest part of the answer. Obviously she was dead. The question was, did she get to live out her life as a pythia and die of natural old age or was it something a bit more tragic than that?

“Malik, he tried to turn her too. Tore the heart from her chest the night he killed me in a fit of aggravated anger when he could not make her a vampire.”

“Oh Ash…”

“No, it is… that was a very long time ago. I miss her, but I have had over three-hundred years to come to terms with her death. I have healed from that pain.”

He gave her a gentle smile to soften his stern words. “No you haven’t, not completely.”

Ash laughed softly. “Perhaps you are right.”

“Look, Ash, I know this is hard, but I’m glad
you’re telling me.” He stopped for a moment, studying her face. “Lilith is really your niece?”

Ash bit into her lip and nodded.

“That’s just… Does she not know?”

“She does.”

He frowned. “Then you don’t get along?”

“Let us just say that our relationship has grown complicated.”

Tristan snorted a laugh. Any relationship with a vampire that didn’t involve getting drained of blood was complicated. He sobered, remembering the girl’s dark words. “So you don’t know what she meant?”

“I do not. My being related to her does nothing for us.”

He frowned, sorry for the obvious pain in her eyes. She lamented the loss of her relationship with Lilith, that much was clear. Tristan just wondered what happened to push them so far apart that they’d act like strangers to each other.

He kissed her
cheek and untangled himself from the bed sheets. “Hey, I, uh, I have something for you.” Figured now was as good a time as any, especially since he wanted to change the subject.

He stumbled out of bed, feeling achy and tired, and over to his bag.
The fact that he was bare-ass naked didn’t even occur to him. Ash took a moment to appreciate the view as he dug around until he found what he was looking for. He smirked at the look on her face as he shuffled back to the bed where Ash was waiting for him. It was nice to see her being honest.

“I know you probably don’t celebrate Christmas and well, we spent Christmas in captivity ‘n all anyway
…” He sat down next to her, hip to hip. “But I wanted to give you something.” His hand was actually shaking when he held out the little jewelry box and he jerked back when she took the proffered gift.

Ash let out a shallow breath. “I… Tristan… I do not know what to say.”

“Go on.”

“Oh, Tristan,” she sighed when she’d opened the little box.

“It was mom’s. I gave it to her the year before they—the year before the accident as an anniversary gift.” He’d been carrying it around since their deaths, a reminder of how life used to be.

Ash opened the locket and smiled. Her eyes started to
rim with red tears. “Your family. They are beautiful. I can see how much they love each other.”

“Yeah,” he whispered. One side had a picture of his parents hugging. The other was a much younger him. Tristan pointed to his picture. “That space is for you and me. You’re my family now.”

She looked to him and clutched the locket to her breast. “Thank you. This is the kindest gift I have ever been given. I love it and promise to cherish it.” That the cover was engraved with a large dragonfly, a symbol of transformation and strength, didn’t go past her notice.

He leaned into her, pushing her hair behind her ear and nuzzling her
neck. “And I’ll always cherish you. We’re in all this together now.”

She sighed wistfully at the feel of Tristan’s lips on her neck
. She could forget, for just a little while, all the things that were meant to come and just enjoy the moment. She’d earned that much at least.

Ash
turned into him to press his back to the bed. She settled herself against his front. The sheets had slipped down, exposing her to the room. Tristan smirked up at her when he realized she was naked too.

“Yes, we are
in this together. Until the very end.”

Probably mine,
Tristan couldn’t help but think as he drew her in for a kiss.

“Not if I have any say in it,” Ash whispered across his lips. “I will protect you with my life.”

Tristan shifted uncomfortably, clearing his throat. He knew all that, but it bothered him for some reason. Maybe because of how close they both were to dying this time.

A sudden
idea came over Ash by the look of delight on her face.