"It's progressing at a rapid rate," the voice says but I am hardly paying attention to what he is saying. Nope heard it before but I wonder if he knows his nose hair is so long that it is tangling with his mustache.

"The only thing left to try is a surgery..." His words drift off again as I watch his mustache pull his nose hair it is weirdly fascinating and gross at the same time.

"Penelope" I hear my name and my eyes meet the doctors, “Are you even listening Penelope I need to know your answer about the surgery"

I take a breath trying to clear my head enough to answer him, “How long do I have to decide?"

"You have about a year or less left Penelope," his hesitation is palpable.

I nod my head solemnly I am not that surprised about the results I knew it was progressing even though I have tried everything to stop it.

But surgery is the last card the wild card in my deck and it’s dangerous, "What's the survival rate for the surgery Doc?"

This time he doesn't answer it fast instead his eyes glance down to his hands like he is trying to calm himself. I know this because he has been my doctor for three years he is the closest thing I have as family which is pretty damn sad if I say so myself.

I reach over the table to grab his hands, "Doc just tells me."

He sighs letting go of my hand to scratch his beard, “The progression of your tumor makes the surgery harder the surgery has only a 5% survival rate it is our last option if we don't do it you will not make it past a year," his voice drops at the end.

I sigh, “So either way I can die but it's still a gamble on how many days I can bag," I know I sound nonchalant about my death but it is only because I have had three years to prepare sort of. What I didn't expect to feel was bitterness I mean I am 18 and I have done nothing in my life I haven't even had sex and I am not dying a virgin I mean come on how much of a loser can I be.

That's when the light bulb above my head turned on. I gave Doc a huge smile, “I will tell you my answer in 6 months that's gives me a half a year to live fully."

He gave me a rueful look but laughed, “Okay then I will call to check on you but I will officially see you for your answer in six months that is May"

I gave him a nod leaving the room in a rush I have to make a list of what i want to do and I need to make it now.

-------

Okay so let me back up a little so I can give you some back up information. My name is Penelope Davis I am 18 years old I have boring long brown hair but I do have some killer eyes they are a smoked gray. Hmm let's see oh did I mention I was plus-size and no, not plus size like those models who wear a size 10.

I am a size 16 sometimes 18 depending on the mood of my thighs I am curvy it never bothered me much. I mean sure high school sucked people calling me names like "Penelope the pig" but I am in college now NYU and believe me people are a lot more mature there. Well most people but there are still some idiots.

Okay so my parents are rich like stuck up nose debutante rich and my mother doesn't approve of my looks of course being a size 2 herself. My father well he is too busy cheating on my mother to deal with me so when I got sick for the first time they didn't even notice.

I was 15 years old when I woke up with a sharp constant pain in my head and the back of my eyes of course my parents ignored it instead throwing aspirin my way. It continued for a week when my house keeper Mrs. Rose packed me up herself and drove me to the nearest hospital.

They did a lot of tests: blood test, X-ray, and even an MRI. To say I was scared was an understatement I was pissing my pants when the doctor finally came in to talk to me. It took a good amount of time because I had to call my parents who were pissed at me because I ruined their day like wtf.

Anyways the doctor told us or more like me that I have a brain tumor called Glibatoma and it was a grade IV which basically means the tumor was all diffused and over the place making it more aggressive.

The doctor told me usually radiation and chemo can stop the progression of the tumor drastically so my parents signed the papers to treat me saying they had to leave back to work. Mrs. Rose stayed with me as I made appointments with the doctor to start chemo and radiation therapy and it did slow it down until now.

So now back to where I am now currently trudging the streets of New York trying to figure out why I should do. That's when I see it. It was a worn out building with a leprechaun drinking a beer on it; it was called "Collin's Pub" not very creative but still something was drawing me towards the building.

Which is ridiculous I mean I am only 18 and I never actual drank before but I am dying so why the hell not and my friend Jason did give me a fake id.

I threw my shoulders back and made myself stand up straight as I opened the door of the pub. I was instantly surrounded by noise and he smell of beer.

I smile heading towards the bar sitting down as an older man came towards me he looked about 25 or 26 black hair and dark blue eyes and a knowing smile.

He put his hands on the table looking at me, “So what can I get you to drink" his voice was smooth and kind of arrogant. Hmm don't know why I thought that.

I glanced at him. “A bud light beer please."

He grumbled something and went to the other side of the bar as I got out my paper and pen making my list. I was about done when my beer was slammed on the table by the arrogant man I pulled my notebook away giving him a dirty look which he promptly ignored walking away.

"Don't worry about him he has a stick up his puny ass," a deep voice behind me growled out.

I turned into my seat my mouth dropping open as I looked at a man who could give the Greek Gods a run for their money when it comes to looks. He was tall about 6'5, toned obviously, perfect tanned skin not artificial (you can tell), long black hair above his shoulders that could be cut a little but worked for him, and piercing ice blue eyes that were now staring at me in amusement.

I shut my mouth wiping it to make sure I had no drool. He stood there watching me intently as he looked me over. I couldn't help but move my hands to cover my protruding tummy I'm not like insecure but when a hot guy like him is goggling me I can't help but feel a little inferior. You know what I mean?

He looked me in the eye again but instead of speaking he plucked my note book out of my hand reading what I just wrote. I was about to protest when he smiled and holy cow I swear my panties about ripped themselves off.

I was watching him as he grabbed my pen filling up two more spots handing it back to me with a wink.

I read the list over:

Penelope's Bucket List

1. Watch ball drop in Times Square

2. Have a drink with celebrity

3. Go to Vegas get plastered, married, ad hen divorced (yay I know I watch too many movies)

4. Smash a guitar

5. Get tattoo

6. Send a message in a bottle

7. Pull a fire alarm in crowded place

8. Carve name in tree

9. Celebrate St. Patrick's day in Ireland

10. Race a car

11. Gamble

12. Stand under Hollywood sign

13. Eat a real Krabby Patty

14. Scuba diving

15. Write in wet cement

16. Fall in love

17. Train an owl like Harry potter

18. Throw a drink at someone

19. Go zip lining

20. Find P.Sherman 42 wallaby way Sydney (Nemo :) )

21. Buy out a concert (his idea)

22. Mardi Gras in New Orleans (his idea)

I laughed out loud looking at his two but automatically agreeing with him but I wasn't going to let him know that instead I gave him an eye roll and a whole bunch of sarcasm.

"Excuse me ass did I give you permission to take my stuff and put nonsense on it," I put my hand on my hip glancing up at his dumbstruck face wanting to laugh at him.

He started to talk but I just held my hand up to stop him, “Never mind forget it you can just buy me another beer from that arrogant prick and we can call if even. Deal?"

I stuck out my hand as he smiled grabbing it firmly and shaking it pulling me towards him placing his mouth right by my ear, "Deal darling."

He had a big ass smirk on his fax as he jumped the bar grabbing me another beer. Oh shit what is he doing he is going to get in trouble. I was going to get his attention when the bartender came back but instead of yelling at mystery dude he just gave him a glare and that's when I noticed that the looked alike except for the eyes.

He gave his brother a smirk walking towards me placing my bee down.

I couldn't help but sneer at him, “dude you could have told me you knew him god I feel so dumb now."

He gave me a laugh shaking his head at me,"Naw it was nice watching you bad mouth my brother my name is Matt Collins by the way."

I shook his hand, “Wait Collins so you like own this place?"

I know stupid question but hey whatever,"Yea my brother and I own it. It's been in our family a long time."

I smiled, “That is awesome."

He waved my comment away holding me captive with his eyes, "So what is your name love?"

I blushed, “My name is Penelope Davis."

He smiled, “Well Penelope I don't know why you are making a bucket list but how about I help you cross one off now?"

I have him a look and then glanced at my list which one is heralding about?

"Which one?" I questioned.

He just gave me a smile pulling out a deck of cards, “How about a game of poker first person to win three hands wins the bet."

I looked over at the cards trying not to grin I was a pro at poker because I my nonexistent love life and only one friend I took up playing online poker.

"Okay deal so what is the bet?" I asked.

He smiled scratching his stubble on his cheek slowly as I memorized the strokes of his fingers, “How about if I win you have to tell Seamus my brother that he is an ugly asshole who needs to get the stick out of his ass."

I watched him smirk as my face paled. “I can't do that he will kick me out."

He leaned over the table closer to me, "Technically love I can kick you out now for being underage," my face flushed as he continued, “I mean your about what 18 years old?"

I glared at him fine he wants to play hard ball so do I, “Fine but if I win you have to help me complete my whole bucket list in 6 months"

I can't believe I said it but it was the feeling of certainty I felt after I said that confused me it’s like I wanted no needed this stranger to help me wtf am I thinking? I am blaming the tumor.

He agreed we shook hands as he led me to a table shuffling the cards. Next thing I knew I was playing poker with an hot ass stranger in an Irish pub crossing off gambling from my list: because I have a feeling this will be the biggest gamble of my life

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