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Authors: Melissa de la Cruz

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BOOK: Birthday Vicious
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Sadie's cheeks turned scarlet, and her eyes brimmed with tears. Lauren was shocked into silence.

That was really mean of Ashley. Okay, so maybe
Sadie was rude, but Ashley was way out of line. People said stuff like that online or in texts all the time, but Ashley had said it out loud, to her face.

Lauren felt awful, then angry. Sadie didn't deserve that. Maybe she was a little bit of a baby and a lot socially backward, but she was a person. She was human. She was still Lauren's friend.

“Wait!” she called. But Sadie had already slammed the Little Theater doors.

Lauren looked around, feeling her anger build. Couldn't Ashley see what she was doing? Didn't she know how mean this was, making the uninvited stand around like losers at a beauty pageant? It wasn't as though Ashley had to have a small party; she could afford to invite the whole school. She just wanted to show everyone how badly she could make them feel.

And eviscerating Sadie was just the worst.

“Okay—that's it!” Ashley handed out the final invitation, and the left-behinds started to drift out of the room, leaning on one another for comfort. Sheridan Riley was talking in an overloud voice about what she planned to wear, oblivious to the dejected expressions of half the girls still in the room.

Ashley herself had the weirdest look on her face. If
Lauren didn't know her better, she'd think it was guilt. Or maybe remorse. But this was Ashley Spencer. The closest thing she felt to remorse was when she found something she'd bought at full price on the sale rack.

Then Ashley began giggling with Lili and A. A., and Lauren heard “loser” and “Boogers” in between their laughter. She made up her mind right then: It had to stop. No more exclusive parties! No more crying and feeling like rejects! No more in and out lists!

Lauren felt invigorated by a bright new idea. Who said old and new friends couldn't mix? So what if Ashley had dissed Sadie just now? Ashley had called Lauren a loser for years, and now they were practically BFFs. Since when did Ashley Spencer ever think for herself? Lauren had manipulated her way into the Ashleys, and she was sure she could do the same for Sadie. Working alone wasn't getting Lauren anywhere. But with Sadie as one of the Ashleys, the two of them working on the inside could totally bring the Ashleys down.

Of course, for her new plan to work, Sadie had to get a makeover. Her clothes and shoes and hairstyle needed a seismic adjustment. She had to get glamorized. Lauren knew that this was possible: Hadn't she done exactly the
same thing this summer? Plus, even Lili and A. A. had noticed that without the glasses and in normal clothing, Sadie looked decent.

Sadie had potential. With an outfit or two from Lauren's extensive designer wardrobe, a sharp, chic haircut from an exclusive salon, a pair of color-tinted contact lenses to turn Sadie's brown eyes blue, and some lessons in take-charge attitude, Sadie could rival any of the Ashleys. She could
be
an Ashley.

Any ambivalence Lauren had felt about her secret plan to crush the Ashleys was gone. She felt keen with purpose, and she knew just where to begin. She was going to get Sadie—and the whole seventh grade—invited to Ashley's super-exclusive birthday party.

Lauren knew exactly how to do it. All it would take was rounding up a few of the disgruntled rejects to place some very important phone calls to someone as insecure and power-crazed as Ashley herself—Lili.

13
ASHLEY FACES A JURY OF HER PEERS?

ASHLEY COULD NOT BELIEVE HER
ears. she'd just slid into her chair for Manners & Morals, in front of a formal place setting. They were learning dining etiquette that week. The first course had been served—some sort of cold, slimy appetizer. Was it calamari? No, apparently it was some kind of French-braised octopus. They were supposed to eat using the correct utensils while making polite conversation. But the question she'd just heard was anything but polite.

“What did you say again?”

“I said, is it true you're facing the Honor Board this afternoon?” Guinevere Parker looked like she would faint if Ashley directed another glare in her direction.

“I'm what?” Ashley looked at her friends for backup. A. A. was too busy poking dubiously at her appetizer to answer, and Lili couldn't meet her eye.

“It's true,” Lili finally admitted, picking up her salad fork and looking skeptically at the food on her plate. “I didn't want to bring it up earlier, but, um, here's your summons.”

“Excuse me?” Ashley was floored. She looked at the little piece of paper Lili had handed her.

She, Ashley Matilda Diana Spencer (yes, she was named after that people's princess), had been summoned to appear before Miss Gamble's Honor Board. The Honor Board! Like she was some common criminal, plagiarist, or cheat!

“But aren't you the head of the Honor Board?” Ashley asked, her voice ringing with betrayal as she pushed her plate away in annoyance. She scowled at Lili. “Can't you do something about this?”

Lili shook her head primly. “I'm sorry, but that's not how the board works.”

Ashley decided she wouldn't worry. She had appeared before the Honor Board before. It met once a month in the oak-paneled school library, a room with ornate molded ceilings, a huge chandelier, glass-fronted
bookshelves, and a giant central table rumored to have come from Thomas Jefferson's house, Monticello.

And once a month, Ashley was called in because she had three late notices. Whatever! Nothing happened. Lili made a solemn little speech, and everyone nodded, and then someone told Ashley how cool her hairstyle was, or asked her where she got her new handbag. She promised to try not to be tardy in the future and then swanned off to lunch. A cakewalk.

“Didn't Honor Board already meet for the month?” Ashley asked, finally taking a small bite and grimacing. Miss Charm told them that part of being citizens of the world was developing a sophisticated palette. Last week they'd dined on a selection of raw fish: ceviche, crudo, and sushi.

Lili nodded. “Uh-huh, but this is, um, a special meeting.”

Ashley couldn't help but notice that Guinevere was taking it all in. This was so not cool. The Ashleys always put up a united front—if word got out that there was infighting in the ranks, then what were the Ashleys but just another group of girls banded together for fear of being alone?

She wanted to wig out on Lili: Her parents would
definitely lose it if they found out . . . she was already on thin ice . . . she'd barely gotten her party back on track—if what her parents were planning could even be
called
a party at this point (Ashley shuddered when she saw the crepe-paper decorations Matilda had picked up at Party City). It was the reason why she hadn't been so gung-ho on going into detail or shopping for outfits. But an Honor Board demerit would sink any party, lame or not.

There could be only one reason she was being called before the board: It had to be because she was late on Monday, didn't it? There couldn't be something else, could there?

“What did I miss?” Lauren asked, scooting into the empty seat next to A. A. and looking askance at the rubbery mess in front of her. “How am I supposed to eat this exactly?”

“Fish knife!” Ashley explained, holding up the correct silverware. “And I'm surprised you haven't heard. Apparently, it's all over school: I'm being called in front of the Honor Board—but I have no idea why!”

“That sucks,” said Lauren, looking nervous all of a sudden. Then she quickly brightened up. “Hey, if you need a student defender, I'll do it.”

Normally Ashley didn't bother with a defender,
because it was hard to defend a late notice slapped on you by an overzealous, fashion-challenged teacher. Just admit the crime, do the time. Ashley usually got away with a painless “warning.”

But this time Ashley agreed to have Lauren argue her case. Everyone knew Lauren was smart. If anyone could outfox Lili and her Honor Board vixens, it would be Lauren Page.

“It'll be okay, I'm sure,” Lili soothed, wiping her mouth carefully with a napkin as one of the refectory workers took their plates away and replaced them with bowls full of what their menu said were “sweetbreads,” although they looked more like fried brains, which, they were soon not too pleased to learn, was exactly what they were.

“Uh-huh, thanks for nothing, Benedict Arnold Li,” Ashley grumbled.

“It's out of my hands, honest,” Lili swore, gagging on a particularly chewy piece.

*  *  *

After the last class of the day, Ashley met up with Lauren in front of the library doors.

“Like I told you, I have no idea what this is about,” Ashley complained, not bothering to lower her voice.
Let the cries of the prisoner echo through the halls of Miss Gamble's!

“Whatever it is, I'm sure we can get you off the hook,” Lauren reassured her. “Just promise me you'll stay calm and let me do all the talking. Well, most of it—okay?”

Ashley nodded. Lauren rapped on the heavy door of the library.

“Enter!” That was her friend formerly known as Lili, seated at the head of the giant oak table. Arranged in a U around the table were her myopic-looking Honor Board cronies, Supriya Manapali, Cameron Welch, and Vicky Zimmerman.

Ashley sniffed and held her head high, leading Lauren to the other end of the table. For these girls, Honor Board was as close as they'd ever come to knowing power—whereas Ashley knew it every day. She pitied them. Really, she did.

“I'm sorry we had to call you in here today,” said Lili, and she certainly looked sorry. Just as well. She was on very shaky ground. “But an urgent matter was brought to our attention, and we felt it necessary to address the issue immediately.”

“Who's been bitching about me?” Ashley burst out.
Lauren placed a calming hand on her arm and shot Ashley a “you promised to be good” look.

“What my client—I mean, Ashley—is asking is this: What is the nature of this urgent matter? Of what is she accused?” Lauren sounded very professional. She probably watched too many Law & Order reruns.

“Nobody's accusing anyone,” squeaked Supriya.

“The thing is,” explained Lili, clicking her Mont Blanc pen and giving Ashley her most earnest look. “I got a lot of calls yesterday concerning what happened during MODs. Some of the girls felt very excluded when you handed out party invitations in public and left some students out. They've gone to the headmistress about it. We had no choice but to call this meeting.”

Lauren coughed and kept her eyes on the notebook in front of her.

“According to the complaint,” said Cameron, who was only on the Honor Board because her parents had paid for new sectional sofas, a flat-screen TV, and a wet bar for the staff's break room, “you were promoting
clique culture
.”

This was so ridiculous!
Of course
she had to exclude a lot of people from the party—that was the whole point! Some people were just more special than others. Although
to be honest, the uninvited wouldn't be missing much. Her party was so downsized, Ashley wouldn't be surprised if her mother showed up with one of those ready-made cakes from Carvel where they spelled out your name in icing right before they rang you up at the checkout.

She had been so sure that by this time Cirque du Ashley would be back on the party-planning menu, but so far nothing had worked. Not crying, not sulking, not locking herself in her room, not threatening to leave home. (“Where would you go? Vermont? Say hi to Aunt Agnes for me!” her mom had said too cheerfully.) Going on a hunger strike didn't make much of an impact. Especially since after two hours Ashley caved in and devoured a whole bag of Pirate's Booty.

The most infuriating thing was, her parents hardly seemed to notice how upset she was. They were completely distracted, as though her party was the last thing on their minds. She had only two more weeks to wear them down.

Otherwise, no one would have any fun at all.

But try telling that to the Honor Board. Besides, Ashley couldn't confess her party was nothing special. It would totally defeat her image.

“Miss Gamble's is founded on the ideals of loyalty, kindness, and service to fellow man,” Vicky intoned in
a solemn voice. “Any deviation of student conduct from school policy can result in a suspension.”

Ashley went pale.

Lili looked at her with a “don't kill me” face.

“Suspend me?” Ashley thought she must have misheard. Ashley Spencer, suspended?
That could not happen.
There was no way she could talk her parents into reinstating her party to its former glory if she got suspended!

“Surely there's a simpler solution.” Lauren's voice was calm and clear. “Is the problem that Ashley's having a birthday party?”

“No,” Lili conceded. “Of course not. It's that the invitations were issued in public, and that some members of the seventh grade were excluded.”

“Ashley,” said Lauren, fixing her with a serious stare. “How many seventh graders have you invited to your party?”

“I don't know—maybe fifteen?”

“So how many seventh graders do not have invitations?”

“Just the lame ones. Eighteen?”

“What would you say,” Lauren said slowly, “to inviting the whole class? That way, nobody would
have any reason to complain. They could all come to the party.”

Ashley opened her mouth and closed it again. Invite
everyone
to her house? Let the plebes in to gaze at the imperial family? How very déclassé.

“I mean,” Lauren continued, staring at her hard, “you have enough space, right? And I believe that solution would be acceptable to the board, yes?”

All the board members nodded enthusiastically. Especially since none of them had been issued invitations. They reminded Ashley of the three wise monkeys, except monkeys were cuter.

BOOK: Birthday Vicious
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