Black (Clashing Colors Book 1) (23 page)

Steve gaped like a fish on dry land and I wanted to stand up and salute her. Cia had just owned the biggest, meanest bully I knew, and that says a lot coming from someone who’s been nine years in the army.

Nobody spoke. No one. Not even the kids.

Until Granny said in a clear voice. “Are there any more bagels?”

I wanted to stay and sort this out. I wanted them to accept Cia into our family, and I’m sure everyone except Brent and Steve would have, but Cia turned around and left, so I followed.

When we got into my car and took off I realized that I had known this outcome was a possibility all along. Why else would I have parked on the street instead of the driveway like I usually did? Had I unconsciously known I might need to leave in a hurry?

I looked over at Cia, who sat pale and quiet beside me.

“Hey, are you all right?” I asked.

“Can we just not talk until we get back to the apartment?” she said, and I respected that.

About the time we had crossed the bridge to the Seattle side, my phone started ringing. I ignored the first calls but when I parked the car it rang again.

“Hey, Mom,” I said when I answered.

Cia looked like she didn’t know whether to stay in the car or leave me to talk in privacy, so I stopped her with a hand on her arm and mimed the word “Stay.”

“Mom, I’m putting you on speaker. I want Cia to hear it too.”

“Oh, hey ,Cia,” my mom said and gave a nervous chuckle.

“Hey.”

“I’m so sorry things got out of hand. I’ve talked to Steve and he’s calmed down. We think you should come back and we could all try and talk about this calmly.”

Cia shook her head vehemently.

“Maybe another time, Mom. I think Cia needs a little time to digest what just happened. I mean, she already knew Brent is an ass, but Steve just topped that.”

“Yes, I know he sometimes speaks before he thinks, but he doesn’t mean it like that.”

“You always protects him, Mom,” I said and felt annoyed with her.

“No, I don’t, and he even said in the kitchen just now that if your accusations are really true and if Brent left our granddaughter to abuse and poverty, then there’ll be hell to pay.”

  “Oh, they are true alright, I can testify to that. I heard her mom admit to the abuse and I know for a fact that when Cia finally escaped the horrors in her mother’s house she came to Brent for help, and he turned her away and left her to live on the streets when she was only fourteen.”

“Oh, Jesus, I’m so sorry.” My mother’s voice broke.  “If only we had known… She could have lived here; I would have gladly taken her in…”

“I know, Mom, I know.”

“Why don’t you both take the time you need and then come see us when you’re ready. We would love to get to know you better, Cia.”

“Thanks,” Cia said and brushed a tear away with the back of her hand. “I think I would like that.”

“I’ll call you later, Mom,” I said, hung up, and turned to Cia.

“Do you think they’ll have me do a DNA test to prove I’m really Brent’s daughter?”

“No, you look like Mia – they’re not stupid. Anyone can see that you’re his kid.”

“It’s the eyes, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, you’ve got his green eyes for sure.”

“I shouldn’t have lectured Steve on the Bible,” she said quietly.

I reached up and stroke her chin. “Are you kidding me? That was the coolest thing that has ever taken place in that house. First of all, to see anyone actually win a face-off with Steve is a historical event, but to do it using the Bible was spectacular.

“Why?”

“Because the Bible is his favorite trump card in discussions. You just moved from badass to superhero in my world.”

She laughed, and it felt amazing to see her white teeth. I kissed her, long and hard, and we walked up to the apartment and made love for the sixth time.

Cia was curious and playful with me, and in return I was patient and let her explore my body.

Making love to her was much more fulfilling than with anyone else, and I think it was because I had committed myself to her. Sure, I had had sex with women who were wilder, more experienced, and even more beautiful than Cia, but I would pick her over them any day.

“I love you,” I whispered and kissed her. It was the first time I spoke those words to her, and she widened her eyes.

“You do?”

“Yes.”

“How do you know?”

“I just do.”

“And you’re not scared that Brent might be right about me just using you?”

I shook my head. “You’ve never asked for anything. It’s always been me offering.”

Her face drew into a serious expression with her brows knitting together. “What did he mean about Heidi using you?”

I sighed. “Heidi and I were together for three years and half that time I was deployed abroad, so she lived in my apartment while I paid for all expenses.”

“And Brent felt that she was using you because she didn’t pay rent?”

“Yeah, and because it all ended when I realized she was cashing in by renting out two of the rooms.”  

“How did you find out?”

“I came home unannounced to find two male models living in my apartment, and when I recovered from that shock I got the next one: finding a used condom in my bedroom trash can.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah… she wasn’t a very nice person.”

“How long ago was this?”

“About two years.”

“And she was your last serious girlfriend?”

“Yes.”

“Haven’t you been with anyone else since?”

I nodded.

“Anything serious?” she asked.

“No.”

“Anything recently?”

I scrunched my face, assuming she meant besides my night with Therese. “I already told you I was in Afghanistan for a year.”

“And you want me to believe you didn’t sleep with anyone for a whole year?”

“Not unless you count masturbation.”

She snickered but didn’t reply.

“So you’ll forgive me if I’m still trying to catch up,” I said and pushed her back down on the mattress.

She chuckled in my ear as I moved on top of her. “How many times do you think it’ll take for you to catch up?”

I arched a brow and gave her a sly smile. “A few hundred times of good sex should do it. I’m thinking that if we do it twice a day for a year, I’ll be okay.”

“Twice a day?”

“We could speed up the process and do it three times a day… that way I would be a happy man by August, I think.”

“And you’re not happy now?” she teased.

“No, I’m miserable, can’t you tell?” I said and suckled on one of her nipples with a smirk. “I’m a starved man, so feed me please.”

She tilted her head and looked down at me with a speculative glance. “How many women have you had?”

I sighed. “Does it matter?”

“Have you ever been unfaithful to any of your girlfriends?”

I tried distracting her by kissing her and taking her mind off her question, but it didn’t work.

“I asked you a question.”

Shit.
Conversations like these never went well, and I wanted to be inside her physically, not have her examine me mentally.

“Uh-huh.” I muttered and lifted her leg up over my hip. Maybe if I got inside her, she would drop the subject.

She didn’t. “What does uh-huh mean? Uh-huh, I’ve been unfaithful or uh-huh, I heard your question – which is it?”

“I want you,” I muttered against her neck and reached for a condom. She answered with a slight moan, so clearly she was affected by my hands and mouth on her body.

I’m sure that if I didn’t have to think of protection, and could have slipped right in, it would have worked. But in order to put on the condom I had to pull away from her and look down. It gave her time to refocus.

“I take your silence on the matter as an admittance of guilt. You have been unfaithful to girlfriends in the past, haven’t you?”

I swallowed hard and raised my gaze to meet hers.

⦓∞
⦔

Cia

I don’t know why it mattered so much to me what Gabriel had done in the past. It wasn’t like I was perfect myself. After all, being unfaithful in a relationship wasn’t a criminal offence. Still, my whole life had changed dramatically since he walked into it, and now he was talking about loving me and asking me to move to Missouri with him. The whole package of Gabriel Thomas seemed perfect, and I’m old enough to know that nothing ever is perfect. So yeah, I was searching for his flaws.

His answer to my question was in his eyes. Yes, he had been unfaithful.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” I asked.

Gabriel sat on his knees in front of me with his hand on his cock where he had rolled on a condom. He shook his head and reached out to cup my breast but I pulled the cover over me and signaled that there would be no sex until he answered me.

With an annoyed exhalation of air, he looked up at the ceiling. “What do you want to know?”

“Has it happened one time or every time you’ve had a girlfriend?”

He rubbed his forehead. “Remember how you assumed I was popular with the girls in high school?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I was.”

“And?”

“And so I shopped around a little.”

“Meaning what?”

He shrugged. “Meaning I wasn’t always the best boyfriend, and when something better came along I moved on.”

“Ohh… okay.” I pulled back a little.

Gabriel placed a hand on my knee. “Look, I’m a different person now than I was back then. It’s different with you, sugar.”

For the first time I couldn’t stand him calling me sugar. It wouldn’t take a lot to find something better than me. Heck, a quick walk down the street would be enough since most women between twenty and thirty would qualify as better than me.

I got out of the bed and started to get dressed. “Can I borrow your phone?” I asked.

He reached out for me. “Come back here… I’ll never cheat on you, I promise.”

“Can I borrow your phone?” I asked again in a harder tone.

“Sure,” he said and looked miserable.

I picked it up and handed it to him, waiting for him to unlock it.

When I got it back I dialed Daniel’s number and waited for him to pick up.

“Hello?”

“Daniel, it’s me.”

“Hey, Black… what’s up?” He sounded happy to hear from me.

“Where are you?”

“Got the new place early… wanna come over and see my crib?”

“Yeah… what’s the address?”

“Ehhh… hang on, I can text it to you.”

“Okay, do that.”

“Will do.”

I hung up and waited for the text.

“Please tell me you aren’t leaving to go hang out with another guy?” Gabriel said in an incredulous tone.

“I’m sorry, but I want to check up on Daniel.”

Gabriel looked down at his naked body. His erection was gone and he pulled the condom off.

“We’re in the middle of having sex and then you insist on roaming through my mental garbage until you find a piece of my past you don’t agree with… to what? Get an excuse to get away from me and go be with another guy?”

“He’s a friend. There’s nothing sexual between us.”

Gabriel got up from the bed and picked up his clothes with rough movements. “Did you even hear me when I said I loved you?”

I tensed my jaw, feeling unworthy.

“Did you? Because it sure doesn’t feel like we’re on the same page right now.”

I put on my shoes and stood back up. “It’s just been a hard day and I need to see my friend.”

The pain on his face made me wince inside. I had just delivered a blow to his head.

“Are you saying Daniel is more important to you than I am?”

“No.” The phone vibrated and I read the address three times, memorizing it.

“Well, it sure feels that way when you run directly from being naked with me to needing to be with him.”

I was already halfway out the door.

In hindsight I wish I could have stayed and talked it through like normal people do, but normal people have role models who teach them how to cope with emotions. I only knew how to run from my pain or drown it with pills, and I desperately needed a pill right now.

“Don’t go, Cia,” was the last thing I heard before the door slammed behind me.

CHAPTER 20

The Psychic

Cia

It took me almost an hour to reach Daniel’s apartment in West Seattle. The neighborhood was a bit sketchy, and I was glad it wasn’t dark yet.

“Hey, girl, you made it,” Daniel said in a loud whisper after buzzing me in. “Come in but be quiet – Violet is doing a cleansing of the place.”