Blood of the White Witch (34 page)

When I opened my eyes again, though, it was
to find the yard was covered in members of our coven, and their
families, who waited to greet us. I wasn’t in the mood to meet
anyone right now, but I knew they were all meaning well.

My dad got out of the car and came around to
open my door. I stepped out of the vehicle and into the waiting
arms of Babs who hugged me so tightly I thought I might never
breathe again.

“I’m so sorry, Portia!” she cried into my
hair, and my lips trembled unspeaking, as tears hit my face. “We
love you so much.”

I thanked her with a nod, and the scene was
repeated with each of the remaining coven members and their
relatives.

When we finally made it into the house, it
was to the smells of delicious food dishes that had been delivered
to the kitchen. My stomach revolted at the thought of eating right
now, and I continued up the stairs, going straight into my bedroom,
closing the door behind me.

My cat, Jinx, was instantly upon me. I
grabbed her up into my arms and carried her over to my bed as she
wrapped her white paws around my neck, and I nuzzled my face into
her fluffy white fur.

I let loose then.

“He died, Jinx! He died!” I cried into her
fur, and I curled into a ball on the bed, holding her tightly
against me.

She stayed there with me until I finally
cried myself to sleep.

I was awakened some time later by a soft
knock at the door.

“Come in,” I said groggily and sat up.

The door opened, and Krista slipped quietly
into the room, her red-rimmed eyes showing in the dim light.

“I’m sorry!” I said bursting into tears once
again. She rushed to my side and swept me up into her arms. “I
tried to save him! I did everything I could think of, but nothing
worked!”

“Hush, sweetheart,” she whispered in a
choked voice, her tears falling upon my shoulder. “None of this is
your fault.”

“He loved you so much!” I said, and she
continued to hold me close. “All he ever hoped for was to find you
again and have some kind of life with you. He missed you so badly
in all the years that you were gone.”

“I know. I felt the same way,” she replied,
her voice heavy with sorrow.

“When he found out where they had you, he
wouldn’t listen to reason. No offense, but I tried to stop him. I
knew they were using you as a lure to get him there,” I
explained.

“That’s my boy,” she agreed. “He was always
headstrong. Portia, you have to let this go. None of it was your
fault.”

“Yes, it was,” I said, my voice shaking from
the crying. “If I would’ve reacted faster when they first stabbed
him, I might’ve been able to do something different, something that
could’ve helped him somehow.”

Krista pulled back then so she could look at
me.

“Portia, listen to me! Trying to have
hindsight isn’t going to change anything. What’s done is done. Now
we have to try to find a way to move on with our lives. Vance would
want us both to do that. He loved us both, and he’d be miserable
knowing that we’re miserable, too,” she said looking into my
eyes.

“I know that,” I replied, and I hiccupped.
“My head knows all the important things it needs to do. I just need
someone or something to tell it to my heart,” I choked out.

“Give it time to catch up, sweetie,” she
said, stroking her hand over my hair, similar to the way Vance used
to. “Now I know this is a hard thing to do right away, but we need
to plan this funeral. All of your family is downstairs. Do you
think you’re up to it?”

I slowly nodded my head, and we headed
downstairs together, arm in arm.

The black casket with silver handles sat on
one side of the small viewing room in the mortuary. I had requested
this first moment to myself. I walked timidly up to the opened
portion at the top.

He looked like he was just sleeping, and I
reached out to touch him, just to make sure. He was so cold.

His hair had been textured perfectly into
place, just the way he liked it, purposely messy. His face still
looked just like him. I was going to have to compliment whoever had
done his makeup. They had worked well from the photograph I had
given them.

He was dressed in the tuxedo he had worn at
our wedding just a few short months ago. His wedding ring was still
on his finger, as mine was still on my finger.

There was a beautiful spray of red roses
that draped the lower end of the casket, with ribbon running
through it that said “Beloved Husband & Son” on it.

I had heard someone once say that the spirit
never strays far from its body before it is buried, so I decided to
speak to him one last time.

“I want to thank you for all the great
memories you’ve given me,” I said, and I reached out to touch his
hand. “You’re the most wonderful person I’ve ever known. I’ll
always keep you right here.” I pointed to where my heart rested in
my chest. “I want to hold you to your word. You said you’d wait for
me. Please do. It may take a long time for me to get where you are,
but I will come. I promise.” I stood there for a few minutes just
drinking in the sight of him, knowing it would be my last private
moment with him. “I love you,” I added finally, bending over to
kiss him softly one last time.

I walked over to the door to let the rest of
the family, who were waiting outside, in.

When they were done paying their respects,
we stepped out so Krista could have a minute to herself with her
son.

She soon reappeared, and two attendants from
the funeral home went in to close the casket before they rolled it
past us to the waiting hearse.

Once Vance was placed inside, we were
ushered to a company limousine, which we rode in while we followed
the hearse to the church.

The funeral service turned out to be fairly
large. It was filled with a great number of teenagers from Sedona
High School and several of their families. The program was short
and consisted of a congregational hymn followed by a slightly
fabricated version of Vance’s life story. There was a solo
performed by a friend of mine who was in the school choir, and she
was followed by the minister who gave some remarks on dealing with
life and death. Then it was over.

The male members of the coven were the
pallbearers. They carried the casket out to the waiting hearse,
which then led the processional to the cemetery.

The casket was removed upon arrival and
placed into a liner before being set upon the motorized straps that
would lower it into the plot. Some chairs and a canopy had been
placed over near it. My dad led Krista and me over to them, while
Mom, Grandma, Brad, and Shelly followed behind.

Once the crowd was assembled, my friend from
the choir sang another hymn, and then the minister said a prayer to
dedicate the grave. Afterwards, everyone was dismissed and invited
to go back to the church for a luncheon that had been provided by
one of the church’s ladies organizations.

I spoke with a few well-wishers before I
pulled my dad to the side and told him to go back to the church
without me. I wanted to stay here until Vance was lowered into the
ground.

He gave me a questioning look and told me to
call him on his cell phone when I was ready for him to come get
me.

I ducked into an out of the way spot where I
could observe things from a distance but not be observed myself. As
soon as the cemetery was cleared, a few workers appeared with
shovels, as well as a man driving a small tractor.

I saw the belts begin to move, and Vance’s
casket was lowered into the ground. My heart began to beat faster
when it quickly lowered out of my sight, and I had to resist the
urge to run after it.

The men soon had the belts up out of the
pit, but nothing could have prepared me for the sound of that first
shovel full of dirt hitting the casket liner beneath. I had to
cover my mouth to keep from crying out.

I watched as the small tractor moved in and
pushed most of the dirt back into the hole. When he had done as
much as he could, the other men came in with their shovels to
finish up the work. Afterward they placed a small metal marker at
the head of the grave.

When they had all left, I made my way out
from my hiding place, slowly walking over to where the soft mound
rose up from the ground. I sank down to my heels and reached my
hand out, placing it in the fresh dirt.

When I removed my hand, there was a perfect
print of it left behind, showing that I had been there.

“I love you,” I said one more time, and I
closed my eyes in sorrow for a moment, then stood and walked out of
the cemetery.

I called my dad when I reached the gates,
and he was there to pick me up shortly. I asked him not to take me
to the church but to take me home instead as I could not handle
anymore people right now.

He dropped me off at home and went back to
the church, since there were still many people in attendance and he
had offered to play host to them for me.

I walked into the empty house and went
upstairs to my room. I changed out of my black dress and went over
to my dresser to find something comfortable to wear. That was where
I stumbled onto one of Vance’s t-shirts and a pair of sweats he had
left there. I gently, almost reverently, pulled them out of the
drawer.

I held them up to my face, trying to find a
hint of his smell on them. There was something faintly there. That
was when I decided to wear them.

They were much too large for me, but I
didn’t care. The shirt sagged to my mid-thigh, and I had to tie the
drawstring hard on the sweats to get them tight enough.

I slipped on a pair of my tennis shoes and
wandered out into our garage where his massive black motorcycle was
parked in one of the bays, next to my little green scooter. His
helmet sat in the middle of the seat, on top of one of his leather
jackets.

Both of these items did smell like him, and
I slipped them on before I opened the garage door.

I climbed onto the bike, lifted the
kickstand, and pushed it backward out into the driveway, then out
onto the street. I kick-started the engine like I had seen him do
so many times. I popped it into gear and took off, roaring down the
street.

My body knew exactly where I was going
without my mind really having to register what I was doing. I made
a right at the highway and headed up into Oak Creek Canyon.

I drove easily, until I came to the small
road I was looking for. I turned off, crossed the bridge and parked
the motorcycle at the dead end on the other side. I took off the
jacket and helmet since it was hot and left them with the bike,
then proceeded to hike my way up to the large flat stone that
marked our secret place.

The memories flooded over me as soon as I
entered into the space. It was like I was watching a movie. I could
see the first moonlit night when he had brought me here, when he
had told me he believed we were soulmates. I saw the ritual in
which he had performed his spell, binding our souls together for
eternity. I saw the crisp, fall day when we had taken pictures in
the changing leaves, when we had laughed and chased each other
through the forest.

It was like he was alive here. I could see
his smiling face as if he were standing before me. I could hear him
telling me he loved me. I could feel his hugs and kisses. His magic
surrounded me, and it was strong.

Flinging my arms out from my body, I twirled
around in a circle, letting a smile spread out across my face.

“I love you!” I shouted while I spun
around.

“I love you! I love you! I love you!” echoed
back at me off the canyon walls.

After I had twirled until I was too dizzy to
stand up, I sank down to the ground. I just sat there and let all
the images I had of him wash over me.

I stayed that way, unmoving, until the sun
had sunk low behind the hills and the night sky began to take its
place.

I decided I had better go home before
everyone became too worried about me. But I knew I would return
tomorrow to visit the ghosts of my past again.

When I walked back into the kitchen from the
garage, it was to a whole host of worried faces.

“Sorry,” I said a little sheepishly. “I
needed to get out for a while.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” my mom asked,
taking in my oddly dressed appearance.

“Vance left these in my drawer,” I
explained, and I ran my hand down the relaxed material.

“Where did you go?” Krista asked me
casually.

I smiled at the memory. “Vance had a special
place he liked to go to in Oak Creek Canyon. He used to take me
there with him after we got together. When I went there today it
was like he was alive again. His magic is strong there. I could see
all the things we had done there together, as if I were watching a
movie. I didn’t want to leave.”

“You seem happier,” she commented, watching
me.

“I was happy while I was there. Would you
like to go see it?” I asked. “I don’t know if it will affect you
the same way, but it was a place that he loved.”

“I would like that very much, thank you.”
Krista smiled at me.

“Come with me upstairs,” I replied, and I
gestured toward my room. “I have something else to show you.”

She followed me up the stairs and into my
bedroom where I pulled out the packet of pictures Vance and I had
taken together.

“We took these in the canyon one day last
fall. It was one of the best days in my life,” I explained, and I
handed them to her.

Krista took the pictures from me, slowly
going over each one until she came to the one which was my
favorite, where Vance was staring straight at me with that loving
look in his eyes.

“He loved you a lot, didn’t he?” she asked
softly.