Blood Red Dawn (19 page)

The days grew longer and the spring turned into summer. After tending my own garden, I would often sit on the steps of my front porch, my eyes closed and my face upturned to the sun. As always when I did this, a sad smile would cross my face and I would drift away in thought to a time when this little luxury would have been a death sentence. And I knew, as the baby moved inside me, that I had made the right choice.

“You might at least have said good-bye.” I heard Mitch's voice saying the same words I'd heard over and over again. I didn't open my eyes, knowing that I would be disappointed as I always had been when I could hear him reproaching me, in the back of my mind. He wasn't real.

“If I had, Mitch, I wouldn't have left.”

“Bloody hell, Deirdre, it was a stupid thing to do.”

He'd never argued with me before in my mind, nor did he swear. My eyes shot open and Mitch stood in front of me. Smiling. The late afternoon sun reflected against his gray hair.

“Mitch!”

“You'd damn well better not have been expecting anyone else.”

I smiled, and struggled to my feet, embarrassed and aware of the grace that I'd lost with the growth of the child. He held out a hand, I took it and he pulled me into a hard embrace.

I pushed away from him. “You shouldn't be here,” I said, “Victor says that even one drop of your blood could stop the baby from growing, from being born. We don't want that to happen.”

“Maybe,” Mitch smiled, “Victor changed his mind.”

“Did he?”

“No.” He stopped for a minute, just smiling at me. Then he started to laugh. “Damn it, woman, have all of your powers of observation gone away?”

“No, I don't think so.”

“Think again. Deirdre, my love, what time is it?”

I squinted up at the sun. “Probably around four or so. Why?” Even as I said it, I realized the significance. “You changed, Mitch? For me.”

“Of course I did. Victor explained why you'd left and I understood. I wasn't happy about it, but there wasn't much to do. I wouldn't have wanted to jeopardize the baby either. Then one night, as the sun was setting, it hit me. I had a hard time finding Victor and had a hard time convincing him I wanted to take the poison. Poison, he called it, as if it wasn't the answer to my every prayer. It wasn't easy and I almost died, but I'm here and I'm as human as I'll ever manage to be. When it was all over and done with, I realized that Victor had planned it this way.”

Mitch laughed and ran his fingers through his hair. “The old bastard knew both of us well enough to understand that the decision had to be one that each of us made without help or input. Any other way, and the two of us would torture ourselves for the rest of our lives over the assumed sacrifice of the other. But I still can't forgive the days and nights I waited for a word from you. So help me, Deirdre, if you ever run away from me again, I'll track you down and keep you prisoner.”

I laughed and kissed him. “Since the night we met, I've always been your prisoner, Mitch. Come inside and I'll show you the new cabin.”

“D
o you miss it, Mitch?” The baby had awakened me in the middle of the night and I found him gone from our bed. When I had her changed and cleaned, I carried her down the stairs to the rocking chair in front of the fire. She nestled into me and began suckling and I kissed the top of her head. I said the words quietly so as not to startle her, poor little defenseless thing.

Mitch had been standing in front of the cabin's picture window when we came down the stairs, staring at the night sky. He turned and the light from the dying fire caught in his eyes, making them glow as they once did, before. “Miss it?” His voice was steady and firm. “Not really, no. But sometimes on nights like tonight, with the sky clear and the moon full, I feel the Wolf again. I miss him. And the Cat.”

I smiled. “Yes, I never thought I would say it, but I miss the Cat, as well. And then there are times when all that has happened feels so far away, so distant, like a dream. All of the years and sorrows and deaths don't seem to matter much, not when compared to the smell of a clean baby and the touch of sunlight on my face.”

“I'm going to make some coffee,” he said. “I'm on morning shift at the station this week. No sense going back to sleep now.”

The baby finished nursing and drowsed in my arms. I followed Mitch to the kitchen and sat down with her at the table, patting her back gently.

Mitch poured two mugs of coffee, added sugar and cream to his, and set mine in front of me. “How's that tooth coming in?”

“Fine. But it's sharp.”

He laughed at me. “What else would you expect?”

When he went upstairs to put his uniform on, I trailed after him, lay the baby in her crib, and sat down on the bed.

“What's on the agenda today?” he asked, fastening his tie and settling his hat on his head.

“Elly's taking us into town for a doctor's appointment. And then I'm cooking you something special for dinner.”

“Oh? What?”

“Fettuccine Alfredo.”

“And life is good,” he said, giving me a kiss on the top of the head. “See you tonight.”

I watched him from the window, driving down the dirt road under the rising sun.

“So, after everything,” I whispered to the baby, “life is good.” I pulled a blanket over her, softly touching her cheek while she slept and dreamed. “And never forget, little one, life goes on.”

KENSINGTON BOOKS are published by

 

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Copyright © 2004 by Karen E. Taylor

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

 

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ISBN: 978-0-7582-8501-0

 

eISBN-13: 978-0-7582-8923-0

eISBN-10: 0-7582-8923-5

First Kensington Electronic Edition: August 2013