Blowback (The Black Cipher Files Book 1) (24 page)

That shocked me out of my stupor.

“An antidote?” All along I’d been under the assumption that the final component was the DNA altering drug she’d referenced. But if it was an antidote....

I’d unthinkingly crouched into a fighting stance.

“It seems to be an antidote to the drug she told you about before.”

What did that mean? Had I already been injected with the original drug? Why give me an antidote if I hadn’t?

“So they weren’t going to inject me with a DNA altering drug.” They were going to inject me with an antidote. Shit.

I needed to lash out at something, punch something. I clenched my hands into fists and started a series of Krav Maga punches and warm up kicks.

Lucas fell into a neutral stance. “Apparently not.”

My suspicions were growing. Before Barb went to work in the private sector she’d done classified work for the government. That was handy wasn’t it? “Her connections to the drug seem awfully convenient.”

His palm slapped at my leg as I lashed out with a knee strike tactic. Then Lucas responded calmly to my snarl. “We’re lucky she’d done some assistant work on the Human Genome project.”

He blocked my kick and struck out with his own. I chopped his foot and executed an arm blow that he managed to evade.

“Again, awfully handy.” Perfect Barb.

Lucas stepped forward into my next move, somehow knowing what I planned. I dropped into position for combat neutralizing grappling.

Lucas mimicked my stance. “That’s why it took so long for her to figure it out. The components didn’t add up. Whatever you sent her clicked everything into place. She realized the drug would counteract or negate the impact of another drug.”

The play of his biceps and deltoids mesmerized me as I assimilated possibilities. If they had been going to inject me with the antidote....

He performed an intricate technique to grab me in a choke hold, but I couldn’t bring myself to care.

“We need to find out more about the original drug,” he said with vicious precision, his forearm strong and tight across my neck.

“And whether I received an injection of it.” I finished for him. Had I? What did this modifying drug do? Had it impacted how I was doing my job? What was the intent of the drug? And what was the intent of the people administering it?

I broke his hold. And I realized he’d let me.

“This may not be the best time to mention it but Barb would like to look at any other data you’ve got.”

I moved away from him, kicking out again, performing a defense against multiple assailants, my arms and legs striking out as if I could knock down all the unseen enemies coming at me. Kicked as if I could decimate the last few days. As if through sheer brute force I could change the chain of events that brought me to this hotel room.

“You studied Krav Maga,” Lucas said.

I recognized the attempt to distract me, and for a moment, I let him. All NSA field agents were trained in a variety of defensive techniques. I just happened to prefer the Israeli Army fighting moves. More pain. “Yeah.”

It was unusual that he also knew the moves but Lucas continually surprised me. I wouldn’t ask.

He offered. “There’s a studio near my apartment. I know the owner so I have a built in sparring partner.”

Lucas grabbed my ankle. I thought about doing a mid-air twist and breaking his hold but my heart wasn’t in it.

He let go of my ankle, his right arm wrapped around my shoulders and pulled me tight against his chest. I let myself sag against him, my forehead resting along his cheek. His left hand cupped my head and he pressed a kiss to my temple. The gesture was sweet. Nothing I usually wanted or needed.

“We’ll figure it out.”

For the first time the word ‘we’ didn’t scare me.

I allowed myself one more second to regroup in the comfort of his embrace.

“We?” I said in my toughest voice.

“We.”

I could either chose to trust him or leave.

I reviewed everything that had happened since I’d met him. I’d been kidnapped. I’d confiscated a syringe full of an antidote to a DNA altering drug.

I’d been followed, lied to, and betrayed by the very government I’d served for the past thirteen years. I’d probably been injected with a drug that manipulated my genes but I didn’t know in what way, possibly impacting my reactions to everything. So not only couldn’t I trust my handler or my government, I couldn’t trust myself.

I took a deep breath then spewed the information in one long exhalation. “
Bellaismysister.
”

“Holy shit.”

“Succinctly put.” My heart pounded as if my adrenaline had kicked into fight or flight and refused to surrender. I hadn’t spoken those words aloud in thirteen years and claiming her as mine kindled something giddy within me.

Lucas shoved me onto the bed and pushed my head between my legs. “My God.”

“I’m okay.” My voice was muffled by the quilted bedspread.

“Stay there for one more minute until my heart rate settles back down.”

“I wasn’t going to faint.” I pushed up against his hand indignantly.

“Right.” A faint sheen of sweat covered his face. “You were whiter than the sheets.”

He sank down next to me. His arm curled around my shoulders and he pulled me against his side. The scent of warm male and hair color chemicals tickled my nose. Heat poured off of him, seeping into me, the smooth skin of his bicep hot against my frigid back.

When had I gotten so cold?

I tried to shift away from him but Lucas held me tight. “Stay.” He stroked his hand lightly down my arm.

When had I last been comforted by someone? My mother, perhaps, over some silly indiscretion or teenage misunderstanding.

We sat, the only sounds the murmur of the shower next door, the soft huff of our breathing, and the smoky, jazz lament of Diana Krall from our television radio.

Thankfully he didn’t ask me anything else about my sister. Just saying the words aloud was all I could handle right now. But I’d have to get to it soon. I took a deep breath unsure if I could even voice the request. I whispered, “I need your help.”

With Bella. With everything.

The head rush hit me harder this time. Stars danced before my eyes. My life had spun completely out of control. I couldn’t count on myself anymore. I needed help and that need was as foreign as the comfort he’d offered.

I’d turned him down before. Now I didn’t have that luxury. For Bella I would do anything. I risked a glance at Lucas.

He still hadn’t answered.

I said it again, louder. “I need your help.”

“I know.” He rested his chin on my head. “You’ve got it.”

“Thank you.”

I pushed away from him eager to put space between us, to establish that line again. The line of separatism. The line of control.

I had to check on Bella, had to reassure myself that for this moment, this night she would be okay. As if by seeing her, even just her image from a security camera, I could cast a spell of protection upon her.

Lucas seemed to understand I needed to be alone while I did it.

“I’ll rinse my hair.” He grabbed some things from his bag and headed for the bathroom. “After I’m done, I’ll set up our nighttime security.”

I cautiously tapped into Georgetown’s security webcams. Her dorm entrance was fairly busy at this time of night. I watched while Lucas took his shower but there wasn’t any sign of her.

So, I accessed her account. She wasn’t online and it was early. I tracked back to her last posting. She was going to bed. She had a mid-term tomorrow.

I tapped the screen lightly.
Keep safe, baby girl.

Bella was safe. At least for tonight. But I still couldn’t relax.

I ripped back the covers of one of the beds just as Lucas stepped up behind me. “I’d think that after our sparring you’d realize that’s a dangerous place to stand.”

Tension ratcheted through me twisting fear and anger into a tight ball in my gut.

He touched my shoulder. “Let me sleep with you.”

Sex would be good right now.

I twirled, snaked my arms around to the hard planes of his back, bumping us together. He slanted his head and pressed his mouth to mine. But his kiss was too nice.

I wanted hard and fast and rough. I didn’t want time to think about breaking my rules. I wanted oblivion. I rubbed my breasts against the mucles of his chest, willing him to ignore my lack of desire and take what I offered.

But he refused to give in and pulled his mouth from mine.

“I’m not talking about sex.” Exasperation laced his words. “Let me hold you.”

Bad idea. Terrible, terrible idea. A mistake in every way. I didn’t want comfort.

Then I thought about all I’d learned today and the fight went out of me. We’d only be sleeping for a few hours anyway.

“Fine.”

He cupped his body around mine and the sense of coming home struck me with such force I wanted to tighten and defend against the threat.

I pulled away, climbed in the bed and turned to face the wall, unable to watch as the mattress depressed beside me.

I willed my body to relax.

“Just for a few hours.” Lucas pressed a kiss against the back of my neck. “Then we’ll figure it all out.”

There was that word again. We.

I’d never get used to it.

TWENTY-SEVEN

Dawn light filtered through a sliver of open curtain. I awoke instantly, alert to my surroundings. I hadn’t thought I would sleep but apparently I’d fallen off within moments and slept. Deeply.

Lucas had wrapped his body protectively around mine. His left arm draped over my waist, his hand rested possessively below the curve of my breast. His fingertips brushed against the soft cotton t-shirt, my body tingling in response to the heat coming from him.

The white sheets cocooned us in a haven of warmth and softness. The urge to linger in that sanctuary, to take advantage of Lucas’s early morning erection, spiraled through me. I’d read about the phenomenon but never actually encountered one. After all, I never slept with anyone, ever.

He was awake. I could tell by the cadence of his breathing he was waiting to see what I would do, letting me have the control. I appreciated the gesture. But it scared me too. I didn’t want him to understand me. Especially after only a few days.

I let myself savor the sensations for one more moment, then curled away from him. “We need to get up.”

He squeezed me in a one armed hug then let go, rubbing a hand over my spiky hair.

“We need to lay out
everything
.” Go over all the events of the last week. And make a list of what we needed to accomplish. First, and most important, was Bella.

I had to assure myself she was okay, needed the cyber-check like an alcoholic craving a pull of liquor.

“Anything I need to disable before I go online?”

He punched a few buttons and deactivated the jury-rigged alarm system. If anyone had managed to track us, they hadn’t attempted to access this room. Unless they were waiting for us to leave.

Lucas hopped in the shower while I got online. I found Bella in her favorite chat room. She was chatting with a girlfriend, GirlyQ. I’d checked out GirlyQ a few months ago. Nice girl, conservative family from Pennsylvania. She spearheaded a campus group for organic living.

Bella hadn’t gone to bed last night. She’d gone out with Donald Christian, the liar.

GirlyQ: So when do I get to meet him.

Bella: I want to keep him to myself for a little longer, but I took a picture on my cell when he wasn’t looking.

A photo would be a goldmine. Come on, baby. Show me this guy so I can nail his balls to the wall.

GirlyQ: Come on. Dish.

Bella: Got to run. I’ve got to go to class. I’ll send it from there. Later.

No! I screamed silently. I needed to see that picture. Now.

I tracked over to the webcam screen and watched Bella rush out the front doors and down the wide cement steps.

She was okay...at least right this minute.

I slowed my breathing, taking a long inhale and a deliberate, measured exhale. My normal patience was gone, replaced by the urgent imperative to protect my sister.

I’d spent the tail end of my childhood and my entire adult life in service to this country to see her safe yet suddenly that safety was threatened.

“She okay?” Lucas spoke from behind me, startling me.

Instinctively, I reduced the screen so he couldn’t see Bella. “For now.”

He knew I couldn’t talk about her so he distracted me. “Did you send the rest of the data to Barb?”

With everything else that had happened, I’d forgotten. Quickly, with no hesitation beyond the simple momentary pause before hitting the send key, I emailed all of the scientists’ files to Barb with a short note. Hopefully she could use the data to make sense of their research.

“Let’s get to it.” He rubbed my shoulders. “We’ve got until eleven to check out but we need to be gone before then. Just in case.”

I nodded. We couldn’t afford to stay in one place for too long. Sitting ducks got shot, no question.

I clicked on the television to cover the sounds of our conversation and thought back to the day we met, the day I was kidnapped. “How long were you following me that first day?”

He shrugged. “Most of the day.”

“Only one day?” I went back over the two days I’d shadowed Staci Grant’s life.

“Yeah.”

“So someone was watching me for longer than a day.”

“What?”

“I made an assumption.” I blew out a breath. Once I’d hooked up with Lucas, I assumed he’d been the one watching me the whole time. Never assume anything until verified. I’d broken my own damn rules. “Give me your timeline.”

“I saw the credit card activity, caught a red eye, got in that morning, rented a car and started tracking Staci, you, about an hour later.”

But I hadn’t noticed him until about four that afternoon, which told me I’d been distracted that day. I’d sensed I was being watched. I should have caught him tailing me, I thought with disgust.

“Don’t sweat it. I’m good,” he said, without an ounce of humility.

I couldn’t let that go by. “I was distracted.”