Boss (12 page)

“You make it sound…”

“Dirty? It is. Be proud of it. It can be liberating to claim the word for your own. Fuck what anyone else thinks. This is about you. Me.” Fuck him to kingdom come, his cock was hard. “Us.”

She looked at him, and passion had turned her eyes the color of scorched whiskey. “That’s hot,” she said.

“Take what I’m offering.”

“You scare me a little,” she admitted.

If that was true, she’d never shown it to him. “A little fear keeps a sub properly in compliance.”

“Was that meant to make me really scared?”

“Did it?”

“I’m probably foolish for admitting this, but no.”

“So what did it do to you?” he asked.

She was quiet for so long that he wasn’t sure she was going to answer.

“Be my slut,” he encouraged. “Tell me what my words did to you.”

“They excited me, made me want to know what would happen if I wasn’t in compliance, if I tested you.”

“I hope you can get what you want from me without having to do that. I hope you feel safe and secure enough with me to ask and trust instead of test.” And if she wasn’t, he’d be there to guide her, encourage her. “Has anyone used the paddle on you?”

“Seriously? No. Well, I mean, except for Andi.”

He frowned.

“She’s a girlfriend. It was her party that I attended. The salesperson passed it around and Andi smacked me. I was wearing jeans, so I didn’t feel anything.” Obviously trying for levity, she added, “She hits like a girl.”

“Use it on your hand.”

“What?”

Without repeating himself, he waited for her to do as he’d said.

“I feel ridiculous.”

In her eyes, Nathan saw the reflection of her struggle. Her gaze was fixed on him and she searched his features. Maybe for reassurance?

She picked up the paddle and struck the palm of her left hand. “It didn’t really hurt.”

“It wasn’t just that Andi hits like a girl. But I’d like to see that.”

She rolled her eyes. “Do all men say things like that?”

“Of course not. We all think it, though. But you’re right, this one makes a nice thud. It’s got two pieces that aren’t attached. It sounds sexy, but it doesn’t do a lot of damage. Unlike a real paddle made of leather or wood, which is what I wanted you to know.” He took another step into the room. “It sounds intimidating, though, doesn’t it? And that adds to the experience, the sensuality of the whole thing.”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“In a scene, all of your senses should be involved. The scent of leather, or perhaps PVC. A paddle like that will make a very satisfying sound when it lands on the fleshy part of your ass.”

She continued to look at him, as if riveted by what he had to say.

“Sometimes I use a blindfold on my subs, but I do it deliberately to enhance the other senses, make the anticipation even keener. But one thing I want you to be clear about, the word on your paddle? It only has the meaning you choose. To me, it means a woman who is sexy and confident, who knows what she wants. Including her man, her Dom. I never disrespect women, and I don’t ever use that term in a derogatory way. But I want my sub to be my slut, to desire me the way I crave her. There’s no room for pretense, only honesty. Calling someone my fuck slut is among the highest honors there is. It means she’s mine, that she appreciates and values me the way I do her.”

She exhaled. “That might take some rearranging of my brain cells.”

“Happy to help.”

“I’m sure you are.”

“What else is in there?” He folded his arms across his chest and waited.

She pulled out a pair of wooden clothespins.

“Where do you put those when you masturbate? And don’t tell me you don’t use them.”

“Do you not allow anyone to have secrets?”

“Where do you use them, Kelsey?”

“My nipples.”

“Plastic ones are better, since they don’t twist. Metal clamps are better yet. But these can be used elsewhere. Like your toes.”

“What?” She gasped. “Are you kidding me?”

“Certain things I don’t joke about. And sex? The things I’d enjoy doing to your body? I take that very, very seriously.”

“I could use a safe word, right? I mean, hypothetically, if we were going to try that?”

“Absolutely. But if you are merely uncertain or nervous about something, I’d encourage you to try it.”

She flicked a glance back to the pins. “Putting them on my toes sounds painful.”

“More pressure than anything.” He was glad she hadn’t said no. “A distraction from other sensations, and an addition to them at the same time. When I play with a sub, I like for her entire body to come alive. I find that her orgasms last longer and happen more frequently that way.”

She picked up her wine and took a big gulp, as if looking for fortification. “Well, maybe for some women.”

He waited.

“I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. Then again, I can’t believe I’m showing my boss my sex toys.” She shook her head.

“What is it you don’t want to tell me?”

“I almost never have orgasms when I’m with a man.”

“Oh? Maybe it’s the fault of the person you’ve been with. Have you ever been with someone who made your satisfaction his sole mission? Who watched you intently, every action, reaction. Every moan, groan? A partner who drove you to the edge of your endurance? Not just once but over and over?”

She scoffed then laughed a little. “I’m sorry,” she said. “That wasn’t meant to be rude.”

He noticed that she absently rubbed her rear. Interesting. Hot.

“Honestly, it sounds like the stuff I fantasize about. You know…” She seemed to cast about for clarification. “You know…something that you want to have happen but never does. It seems it’s over before it ever starts.”

“Challenge accepted, Ms. Lane.”

Her mouth parted before she pressed her lips together. “It wasn’t meant that way.” She shifted her weight from foot to foot. “It’s probably just me.”

Then, as if anxious for the conversation not to continue, she lifted a small butt plug from the drawer.

It was a thin, silicone thing. Not much fatter than one of his fingers. “Do you play with that?”

She put it down on the bed, but he realized she’d used the action to avoid eye contact.

“Do you?” he repeated.

“I have. A couple of times,” she admitted.

“Do you like it?”

She turned her head so that she glanced at him for a second before going back to what she was doing, which was mostly hiding from him. “It helps me get off,” she admitted.

“And do you enjoy anal sex?”

“I’ve never had it.”

“Would you like to?”

“I’ve heard it hurts like hell.”

“That wasn’t an answer. Look at me.”

Slowly, she did.

“What’s the biggest thing you’ve had in your ass?”

“I’m hoping the floor is going to just open up and swallow me at some point.”

“There’s no escape from me, Ms. Lane. I will pursue you relentlessly. I will have my answers. I’ll force you to think about things you never have before.”

“You already have.”

He nodded tightly. “So answer the question. So far, what’s the biggest thing you’ve had up your ass?”

“Just this.”

“You’ve never experimented with your boyfriends?” he persisted. Even if he were vanilla, if he knew his woman was interested in being fucked in that tightest hole, he’d have been all over it.

“I tried with one.” She did look at the hardwood plans, as if still hoping for escape. “He couldn’t…ah…”

“Maintain an erection?”

She breathed out in a huff. “Exactly.”

He nodded, appreciating her honesty, then asked, “Anything else in there?”

“My wand.”

Of course. Many women he knew, and a good number of Doms, owned one.

She pulled it out and put it on the bed next to her other toys.

“How often do you use it?” he asked.

“Every time I masturbate.”

“Which is how often?”

“I don’t know.”

“Approximately?”

“You are annoyingly persistent,” she said around an irritated sigh. “Twice, maybe three times a week.”

“And you orgasm then?”

“Most of the time. Sometimes, I just use it to help me relax so I can go to sleep.”

“If we play together, you won’t be using it unless I give you express permission.”

“What?”

“My submissive’s orgasms belong to me.”

Color drained from her face. “I’m not your sub.” But her voice lacked conviction, and her words were barely above a whisper.

“You want to be.”

“Oh my God.” She closed the drawer.

“Isn’t that why you’re going to Deviation? Because you know there’s more to life, a relationship, sex than what you’ve experienced up until now?”

“Mr. Donovan…”

“It’s your call,” he told her. “Nothing will happen that you don’t agree to. You can go to the club with me this weekend, if you want. I’ll make sure you experience everything you’ve ever imagined. But you’ll go as my submissive. And that means we’ll play together before we attend. We’ve got several days.”

“What about work?”

“There will likely be some influence on our work relationship. Hopefully you’ll be a little more respectful so that you don’t get your bottom spanked so hard that you can’t sit comfortably.”

Her scowl was fast and furious.

“What if you deserve it?” she countered.

“If I’m disrespectful to you, you’re more than welcome to whip down my pants and spank me.”

She put down her glass with enough force that the wine sloshed to the top of the rim. “Can you take this seriously?”

He’d given her enough space, kept his hands off her longer than he’d thought possible. Nathan devoured the distance between them and captured her shoulders, bringing her up onto her toes and only inches from him.

Fuck.
She smelled amazing. Feminine… His senses blazed. “You have no idea how serious I am about all of this, Ms. Lane. The question is, what do you want to do about it? Do you want me to escort you to Deviation on Saturday night? If your answer is yes, I will expect you to let me train you, starting now.”

Chapter Five

With Nathan’s hot breath on her face and his strong fingers on her shoulders, Kelsey couldn’t think rationally. The heat of him overwhelmed her. His touch ignited something inside her that she’d never felt before. There was no way she could deny how much she wanted him, ached for him.

On all levels, this was wrong. She shouldn’t be fantasizing about submitting to her boss. Even if a relationship was permitted under corporate policy, it didn’t make it a smart thing to do. In fact, it was insane. How was she supposed to show up at work and pretend everything was normal if he’d spanked her the night before? Tormented her naked body? Oh God, or worse…fucked her.

Everything he’d said had fascinated her. He’d spoken of things so matter-of-factly that he’d taken away her embarrassment, given her an avenue to be honest with herself as well as him. She was finding courage to admit things aloud. In such a short time, she’d been more frank with him than any of her lovers.

Despite the risk, she wanted him to force her over his knee, make her bend over while he hiked her skirts, tied her to a spanking bench. These were the types of fantasies that helped her to orgasm when she played with herself.

He was offering her the experiences she so desperately desired. At the same time, the idea of being trained by him, spending all her time with him, scared her witless.

And there was the fact that some of it would freaking hurt. “This whole thing is exciting, but it also makes me nervous. I don’t know what to do. Where to start.” But she did know that the longer she stayed in his arms, the more she wanted to be there. His touch seduced her.

“Tell me you want to do this,” he said, asked, demanded. “The rest we can figure out from there.” His fingers bit into her skin, communicating his seriousness.

This man’s power, his strength, his overwhelming personality… How could she deny him anything? For him, she was lost. “Yes. I do.” Knowing that Andi would understand her decision to go with him, she repeated herself with more conviction. “I do. I’ll be yours for the week.” She didn’t know what the hell it entailed, but she vowed to get everything out of the experience that she could, no matter the cost later, maybe in regret or recrimination. It was better than a lifetime of wondering.

“Kelsey?”

How long had he been talking? “Sorry.”

“Let’s pretend this is a dance. I’ll lead. You follow. Nothing will happen that you don’t want.”

“I know. I know.” Was she only imagining that his voice was less harsh than earlier? That his eyes were greener? “Stop. Please. And… And do something.” She wasn’t sure what. Now that she’d told him she would be his for the next few days, she was horny in a way she’d never been before. Showing him her sex toys, lining them up on the bed, had cut past her first level of embarrassment. Now she wanted him to use them on her.

He moved slowly as he released her and brought his hands up to capture her face. His grip was firm and relentless as he looked at her, refusing her quarter.

“I’m going to kiss you. Hard. Deep. And you’re going to open your mouth for me and give yourself over to me as if I own you.”

Her knees wobbled. Because he seemed to be demanding an answer, she whispered, “Okay.”

“Yes,” he corrected. “I won’t accept half answers or prevarications. It’s yes or no, followed by Nathan, Sir or Mr. Donovan.”

“Yes, Mr. Don—” Before she could finish his name, he’d sealed her lips with his. She opened her mouth for him and he plundered her immediately, hard and fast, making it impossible to breathe.

She wrapped her hands around his wrists, holding on to him for her sanity, her life.

His mouth was hot and demanding.

His kiss consumed and destroyed.

He commanded her surrender, and she gave it.

Kelsey allowed her body to relax, and he pressed forward, asking for more.

Nathan moved one of his hands and curved his fingers into her hair near her scalp then eased her head back as he deepened the kiss.