Almost choking on my drink, I gawked at her. “What did you just say?” Rolling her eyes and taking a deep breath, she leaned into the table and took my hand. “I should have told you, I know, but things were going so well with Ollie. I came out of my house to come over to you guys and his Jag was parked out front. He was just sitting there staring at your door. I marched over and told him to get lost and that you’d moved on, that you were with Ollie now. He slammed the car door in my face and drove away.” I stared at her in disbelief. “He was at my house and you didn’t tell me? Was that all that happened? What did he say?” Letting go of my hand she sat back in her seat and sighed. “No, he gave me something to give to you. A Christmas gift. But I didn’t think it was a good idea so I tossed it in the trash. He said he just wanted to give it to you and then leave so I said I would do it and that he could leave right now.” I shook my head and ran my hands over my face. How could she not tell me this? I’d called him that very morning. No wonder he was so pissed. “Mel I cannot believe you didn’t tell me this! You have no idea what you’ve done!” She looked confused and a little hurt but I was pissed at her and she needed to know why. “I called him that morning. Amy told me Felix’s restaurant went bust and I knew it had something to do with Jared. I called to see if I had anything to worry about and he was totally impersonal. Now I know why! He probably wondered why I didn’t thank him for my gift and he definitely wouldn’t have liked finding out I was seeing Ollie! Just when I think this whole thing couldn’t get any messier, you go and put everything into the mixing pot and stir it all up. I need to go home.” Grabbing my cell and my purse I slid out of my seat. “Layla you’re overreacting. I was protecting you. If you had seen him that morning you would have ruined every chance you and Ollie had. I was doing what was best for you.” “ No Mel, you did what you thought was best for me. You made a decision that wasn’t yours to make and now I’m left picking up the pieces, again. How am I going to face him at dinner now? And before you even suggest it, no, I will not cancel. I’m going home. Do me a favor and don’t follow me. God Mel, why didn’t you just butt out?” She got to her feet and tried to apologize but I was already on my way to the door. My words may have been harsh but I’d spent days brooding over the fact that Jared was so distant with me, that he simply didn’t care and had clearly moved on. It meant I could move on and try to get over him. The comfortable little security blanket I’d woven around myself with Ollie was being picked apart thread by thread. I’d just made it back to my room when my cell buzzed again. I expected it to be Mel trying to make amends but seeing Ollie’s name flash across the screen, I smiled with relief. “Hey rock star. You made it then.” He chuckled and I could hear his lip ring clunk against the phone. “Yeah, I’m here. So what are you guys all doing without me?” I thought for a moment whether I should tell Ollie what happened but with him so far away and still having to drive back, I didn’t want him to do so in a mad panic because of the company I would be keeping tomorrow night. “The girls went to the bar. I’m not feeling it so I’m just reading in my room. You know how it is.” “ Missing me too huh?” “ Of course.” “ I won’t be gone long. I’m meeting her tomorrow and then heading straight back. Leave the door unlocked for me?” I smiled knowing that he’d want to see me the moment he got in. “Sure thing stud. I gotta go, battery’s a little low. Call me tomorrow?” “ Naturally. I love you Layla.” I paused and bit my lip. God how I wished I could say it back to him. “ I know. I miss you too.” Damn it. I was sure I heard him sigh and it filled me with guilt. His endless patience with me was endearing but I couldn’t help but feel I was wrong in all this. I’d been stringing him along for four months now and it was bordering on cruelty. I needed to get a grip on things and figure everything out soon because what I was doing to Ollie wasn’t fair. It was damaging for everyone and the longer it went on, the more hurt and pain it would cause.
Chapter 41
Playing Games
I hardly spoke to Mel all day on Saturday and as I sat at the doctor’s office waiting for my shot, I still simmered with anger. I was still mad at her and although I understood her reasons, I couldn’t get past the fact that she’d kept it from me. If there was one person in my life I always counted on for honesty, it was Mel and she’d just let me down. Deciding not to get too dressed up for the dinner, Amy had lent me the little black dress I’d worn on the first date Jared and I had been on. Part of me was doing it to spite him but other than the fancy designer dresses he had bought me I really didn’t have anything nice to wear. I searched through my jewelry box for a suitable accessory and finding the bracelets, earrings and ring Jared had given me I decided to up the ante. I could prove I was over him, us, and that I too was moving on. Slipping the white gold and diamond bracelet over my wrist I smiled. See, just a piece of jewelry, nothing more. The light hit the stones and it glistened and shimmered on my wrist. Jared’s words echoed in my mind ‘ a bracelet fit for a princess’. It was painful. I stared at it as it hung heavily around my wrist. How could things have gone so horribly wrong when it started out so right? Of course I knew the answers but I needed to stay strong tonight. If I could get through this dinner with him, then I could finally leave our history where it should be; behind me. At seven sharp, Daniel pulled up to the sidewalk and hurried to open the passenger door for me. Sliding into my seat I stiffened. Sitting over at the far side of the bench was Jared. Dressed in a stunning gray suit and black tie, he stared out of the window. His hand was covering his mouth and his elbow rested on the door handle. Turning my attention to Daniel, I thanked him and got comfortable; well, as comfortable as you can be sitting mere feet away from your ex-lover. We drove in silence for a while and the tension between us was so thick it could have been sliced with a blade. “ Where are we dining?” Without looking at me he answered in his very business-like tone again, “The Arlington. It’s not far and it’s Arthur’s favorite restaurant.” I slumped in my seat. Why did everything have to feel so strained between us? Could we not even be civil? “If we’re to spend an entire evening at the same table I would think we can at least be civil to one another. There’s no reason for you to hate me and treat me like a stranger Jared, I’ve done nothing wrong. You broke my heart remember?” His head snapped around and his eyes bore into me. “Hate you? You think I hate you? You really have no fucking idea do you Layla. I couldn’t hate you if I tried and believe me, I’ve tried. Especially after what happened Christmas morning. And for the record, if you care to remember Layla, you broke mine first when you kissed that prick.” Now I was infuriated. “How dare you put this on me you jackass! You lied, sneaked around and kept things from me from the first moment we met. Yes, I kissed Ollie and you know what? I liked it. I never asked or wanted him to kiss me but I wanted to know how it felt. I wanted to feel his lips on mine and I love feeling them on mine every time he does it now! And as for Christmas, I didn’t even know you were there. I only found out last night and I certainly never received your gift. If you’d had the guts to face me maybe I would have. But I still would have handed it right back.” My words were harsh and in retrospect, I didn’t mean half of them but I wanted to hurt him; make him feel an ounce of how I felt every time he was near me. Leaning forward, he knocked on the dark glass separating us from Daniel. “Pull over and call Mr. Kent please Daniel. Inform him we’re going to be a little late.” What the hell was he doing? There was no way we were spending any more time together than was absolutely necessary. Grabbing the door handle I tugged hard but hitting the central locking on the panel next to him Jared thwarted my attempt at escape. Fuck. “ Sit down Layla. You and I need to have a conversation before dinner.” I glared at him as he shifted closer to me. My heart raced with every inch he drew closer. “I sat in that car for an hour trying to find the courage, the words and the strength to walk up to your door. But your friend made damn sure I stayed away. Finding out you had already moved on with someone else nearly tore me apart. It took every bit of my willpower not to break your door down and beat the shit out of him. Then just when I think I could maybe try and move on, you come out tonight wearing that. Don’t think I haven’t noticed that’s the dress you wore on our first date and this…” He grabbed my hand and lifted the bracelet into the light. “…Is by far the lowest blow you’ve ever dealt me. You tell me you’ve moved on with him and yet your body, dress and choice of jewelry tells me something totally different. Stop playing games and maybe for the first time since we’ve known each other, we could try a little honesty for once!” Snatching my hand from his grasp I got in his face, practically spitting feathers. “Honesty! You wouldn’t know what honesty was if it kicked you in your uptight, tattooed ass! Don’t lecture me on playing games when we both know you’re an expert at them. And you always seem to win.” He snorted and it fueled my fury. “Win? You think I win? I don’t think so Layla because the most important game I ever played I lost! I lost everything!” His eyes were dark and the vein in his neck was protruding as I watched him get angrier and angrier. It both thrilled and frightened me that I could still provoke such emotion in him. And the realization that he could do the same was a reminder that I clearly wasn’t over him. I was still entwined in the web our relationship had spun and there was no clear way to get out. “You only have yourself to blame for this Jared. Your secrets were so important, so big that I wasn’t trustworthy enough to keep them and that’s the bottom line. You didn’t trust me.” He backed away and stared at me. I’d just driven home the very core of our problems. He sat back in his seat and regarded me coolly. My heart ached seeing him that way, so broken and hard faced. “You don’t think I wanted to tell you Layla? Of course I did but I thought I was protecting Lucy and protecting you. But you kept things from me too, you questioned everything I did, said and gave you. You always second guessed my reactions and motives. I’m not a monster Layla. I would have understood. I may not have liked some of those things but I would have respected you for telling me the truth.” He let out a long sigh as I sat there speechless. It was a conversation that was long overdue but I never thought I’d be left feeling so confused. “Let’s just get through this dinner and then you can go back to your life with him and I can go back to my personal hell without you.” Staring at the floor I nodded. Tapping on the glass he instructed Daniel to drive us to the restaurant. There was nothing left to say. The restaurant was beautiful. Large crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling and paintings of food and wine were scattered across the vast walls. The tables and chairs were draped in ivory covers and the silverware was gleaming beneath the bright lights and crystal. Rising to his feet Arthur took my hand and placed a kiss on my knuckles. “Miss Jennings, delightful to see you again. How are you my dear?” I smiled politely. “I’m well, thank you.” Jared pulled out my chair as the true gentleman in him always did and giving him a grateful look, I sat as the two men began to discuss the building plans for the new forum. Studying the menu, I furrowed my brow, unable to understand what any of it was. Written entirely in French, the most I recognized was the word ‘vin’ which I immediately knew to be wine. That seemed to be the most appealing thing on the menu considering the gut wrenching anguish I was feeling after our car ride. Leaning over, Jared whispered into my ear. “I already ordered you the chicken roulade. You’ll like it. By the way, I can’t stand seafood.” What? “ Makes me violently sick. But if I’m at a seafood restaurant and entertaining clients, I eat it, make my excuses to go to the bathroom and throw it all up. True story.” I stared at him completely perplexed. “You wanted to know my secrets. I have a fair few more too.” He returned to his conversation with Arthur as I sat there in bewilderment. So he hates seafood, big deal. “So Miss Jennings, how do you feel my new assortment of stores could appeal to you and your friends?” Straightening up I gave him a smile, “Well, we’re terribly poor, awful I know, but true. The main issue for students such as myself is not only the ability to afford luxuries, it’s now also become a daily struggle to be able to simply buy our basic day to day items such as food and books. Your stores need to offer something that others do not. Discounts, good value, multiple purchase rewards and also somewhere to simply hang out with friends that doesn’t cost the earth. I love the idea of your development Mr. Kent and I am very much in favor of the jobs it will create for students like me.” I glanced at Jared as an expression of regret swept over his face. I’d left the job I loved after we’d broken up and he was only too aware that I would now be struggling for cash. “If you can give them good quality products and low cost, they will come in the hundreds Mr. Kent. Long Beach is an expensive place to be a student and many of us come from humble beginnings.” Jared’s hand immediately covered mine on the table as he leaned into my ear. “I’m sorry you felt you had to leave Layla. I know what it feels like to be struggling and if there’s anything I can do, please tell me. But there is always a job for you at Lorraine’s. Always.”