Brave Beginnings (14 page)

She shifted from one foot to the other to
keep warm, and when the wind blew directly in her face, she turned
around. As soon as she did, she realized that Ernest was walking
across the street. He hadn’t seen her yet, but when she got ready
to turn around again, his gaze met hers and she knew it was
pointless to pretend she didn’t see him. For a moment, she thought
he might ignore her and go right into the bank. When he strode in
her direction, her hopes plummeted. So much for that idea!

What could he possibly want? Surely, he
didn’t think fondly of her after she turned him down twice.

Ernest tipped his hat and stopped in front of
her. “Good morning, Julia.”

“Uh, hi Ernest,” she replied, wishing she’d
gone in the bank. At least then, she’d be with Millicent and
Millicent would help break the tension. “Are you having a good
Christmas?”

“It’s fine. Not as good as yours, I hear. I
ought to congratulate you on your marriage.”

Her face flushed despite the chill. “Yes.”
What exactly was she supposed to say? She cleared her throat and
took a deep breath. “Um...I didn’t have an actual wedding. It was a
very small affair with the preacher.” She glanced at the door and
wondered just how long Millicent’s business would take in
there.

“Can I ask why?”

Surprised, she looked at him. “Why what?”

“Why did you pick someone like him?”

Frowning, she asked, “Someone like who?”

“You know. A redskin. I don’t get it. I’ve
tried to figure it out, but I can’t think of what he has that I
don’t. He has no viable skills, and your life won’t be as
comfortable as it could have been had you married me.”

She gasped at the insult. “How dare you call
him a redskin! Why, I’ll have you know that he printed today’s
edition of the Tribune!”

“Did he?” He appeared mildly amused. “Good
for him. He knows how to line up paper and run it through a
machine.”

Without thinking, she slapped him, and the
papers she’d been carefully holding to her chest slipped to the
ground.

Ernest didn’t rub the red mark on his cheek.
In fact, for a good five seconds, he exhibited no discernable
reaction at all, and that unnerved her. Finally, he shrugged, took
a step back, and pointed to the ground. “You should pick up those
papers before they get too wet. I wouldn’t want you to miss out on
the only accomplishment your husband will ever have.”

Just as she stepped forward to slap him
again, she slipped and fell to her knees.

“I’d help you up, but I don’t dare risk
getting slapped again.”

“I’m glad I didn’t marry you, Ernest. You’re
small and petty and rude. You can take your money and fancy job and
shove it.”

“Why Julia, that kind of language is
unbecoming for a lady. Being with a savage has certainly brought
out your baser instincts.”

Outraged, she struggled to her feet, but
before she could march toward him, he’d already slipped into the
bank.

Julia’s entire body shook with rage as she
watched Ernest scurry into the bank like the rat he was. She
couldn’t believe she ever let him court her. All along she’d had
that underlying sense of unease about him, and now she knew exactly
why. The man was spiteful and thought much more of himself than he
ought. She gritted her teeth and collected the damp folded
newspapers off the ground. These were useless. She’d have to buy
more copies.

She bit back the hot sting of tears that
filled her eyes. Who cared what Ernest thought? Chogan worked long
and hard to get to this position. He started out delivering papers
and running errands. In a matter of months, he was already learning
the ropes of working a printing press. Who knew how far he could go
in a year or more? So it didn’t matter what Ernest thought.

He’s upset because I married Chogan instead
of him. It’s jealousy talking and nothing more.

She looked down at the papers and noted how
nicely the columns were laid out. Chogan was meticulous with his
work, and he took pride in everything he did.
As well he should.
He knows the value of patience and hard work.
She brushed the
tears from her eyes so Millicent wouldn’t know how much Ernest’s
words bothered her. But what did Ernest know? Nothing. Absolutely
nothing. And she was right to reject his proposal. She was smart.
She showed good judgment. Why, she bet if Chogan and Ernest were in
the same room, Ernest would run off like a scared rabbit.

She chuckled. Oh what a sight that’d be! And
she could show Ernest just how savage she could be because she’d
aim an arrow at his pompous behind. They could very well run the
rat right out of town if they wanted.

Her daydream only lasted for a minute when
Millicent stepped out of the bank. Millicent took one look at the
newspapers and sighed. “Oh dear. What happened?”

The reminder of Ernest’s harsh words brought
back some of the anger she wanted to suppress now that her cousin
was right beside her. “I dropped them by accident.” No need to give
the whole sordid story to Millicent. The poor girl wasn’t involved
in any of this.

“I’m sorry.” She sorted through some coins in
her purse. “I took out enough for more copies. Let me buy them this
time.”

Julia took a good look at her cousin. “You
don’t think it’s wrong for me to be excited about something as
small as the way the newspaper was printed, do you?”

“Of course not.” Millicent laughed and shook
her head. “What gave you that silly notion?”

“I just wondered, that’s all.”

“Your husband has accomplished a lot more
than I ever could. He grew up in a tribe, knowing nothing of our
ways and knowing so little of our language. I remember how he
talked when I first saw him and I heard the improvement at
Thanksgiving. Why, he’s come a long way. Considering that he didn’t
know anyone at the Tribune when he started and is ahead of Noah who
started a month before him, it proves how far he’s come. In some
ways, I envy you.”

“Envy me?”

“You have a man who was willing to leave
everything he’d ever known to be with you. Oh, if only a man might
love me like that!” She clapped her hands and sighed. “You have
done remarkably well in the affairs of the heart.”

Julia thought over her cousin’s words and
realized she was right. “He did give up everything for me, didn’t
he?”

“You are a most blessed woman.”

“I am. And I’m very proud of him and what
he’s accomplished!”

“Which is your right.”

“You’re right, Millicent. It is my right.
It’s good for a wife to applaud all of her husband’s
accomplishments, even if others think they’re small.”

Millicent smiled and directed Julia down the
sidewalk. “There’s no use in trying to convince me. I’m in full
agreement with you.”

Feeling much better, she said, “Millicent, I
must admit that you are turning out to be a most wonderful
friend.”

“Weren’t we friends to begin with?”

“I suppose. We are cousins, after all. But…”
She tried to find the right words to adequately convey what she
meant.

Millicent patted Julia on the arm and said,
“You don’t have to say it. I know.”

This time when Julia’s eyes filled with
tears, it was from gratitude.

~~********~~

As soon as Julia came home, she found her
aunt sitting in the parlor, knitting a scarf. She wasted no time in
hanging up her coat and setting her boots by the doorway.

Erin glanced up from her red and blue yarn.
“Did you get the papers?”

“I did.” Julia set a new stack of newspapers
on the table by her aunt.

“You got that determined look in your eye.
Might as well come out and say it.”

Julia sat next to her on the couch and said,
“I want to switch banks.”

Erin chuckled. “Have you forgotten that
you’re a married woman now? You don’t need me to make that
happen.”

“But what about your funds? Will you keep
your money at the bank where Ernest works? He called Chogan a
redskin!”

“Ernest did what?”

“He was awful. I can’t believe I ever had
anything to do with him. I know he’s upset because I married Chogan
instead of him, but he had no right to suggest that Chogan was
stupid.”

“Ernest did that?” Her aunt appeared shocked.
“I’ve never known Ernest to be impolite.”

“That’s because he never showed his true
colors before today. I really don’t want to have anything to do
with him, especially not with the money Chogan’s bringing into the
household. If Chogan isn’t good enough for him, then Chogan’s money
isn’t good enough for his bank.”

“Alright, alright.” Erin rubbed her back.
“You’ve obviously had a trying day. I will withdraw my money.”

“Good.”

“Julia, you are aware that things are going
to be more difficult for Chogan because he’s Indian, aren’t
you?”

“What do you mean?”

She gave her a sympathetic smile. “You are
unaware of things as they unfold around you, but I suppose love has
that affect on a woman. My dear, most people have certain
perceptions about Indians—what they are and what they aren’t. They
look at Chogan and assume he’s not as smart as white people.”

“That’s ridiculous!”

“Ridiculous or not, it’s how things are.” She
reached out and squeezed Julia’s hand. “What Ernest said today is
probably what most people think. I hear talk. I’m sure Chogan’s
aware of how things are.”

“If he’s aware of it, then why does he put up
with it?”

Erin gave her a kind smile. “Suffice it to
say, he loves you.”

“But they don’t think he’s stupid at the
Tribune. Why would they let him run the printing press if they
didn’t think he was smart?”

“I didn’t say all people assumed the worst
about Indians. I said most people. It looks like Anthony knew what
he was doing when he took Chogan to the Tribune.”

Julia put her face in her hands and thought
over anything anyone might have said within her hearing that gave
credence to what her aunt was saying. The only thing she recalled
was her conversation with Millicent, but Millicent turned out to be
very supportive. Other than that one time and Ernest’s words today,
she couldn’t think of a time when she heard someone make a cutting
remark about her husband. Was it possible that they did say it and
she didn’t notice? Or maybe they made sure she was out of sight
before they spoke?

The sound of the front door opening caught
Julia’s attention, and she looked up in time to see Chogan entering
the house. He stomped his boots on the rug before taking them off.
She watched him carefully, trying to determine if what the others
said about him affected him or not. From all outward appearances,
he seemed like he usually did, but that didn’t mean anything.
People could hide their feelings.

Erin patted her hand and placed her knitting
supplies into her basket. “I’ll take this upstairs.”

Julia stood so she could walk over to him.
She waited for him to hang his coat and hat before she hugged him.
He felt wonderfully solid, strong and secure. How she loved him. He
wrapped his arms around her, and she settled her head on his chest
and closed her eyes. Sometimes, when it was just the two of them,
the rest of the world melted away. She wished it could always be
this way.

It wasn’t until Erin closed her bedroom door
that Chogan spoke. “Is something wrong?”

She let out a heavy sigh. “I’m not sure. Are
people being mean to you because you’re Indian?”

“Mean?”

“Is there anyone who isn’t treating you
fairly?”

He didn’t answer, and that worried her.

She stepped back so she could look at him.
“Chogan?”

“We should talk,” he finally said and took
her by the arm so they could sit in the parlor.

This didn’t sound good, and she already felt
the thread of resistance pulling her back. Had it been anyone else,
she would have bolted for the steps, but she couldn’t run from
someone she cared about so much. She sat beside him.

Taking her hands in his, he asked, “What
happened today?”

She frowned. “I’d rather not talk about it. I
asked you a question. Why don’t you answer it?”

“I need to know what made you ask the
question. Then I can explain things as they are.”

“Oh, alright. I ran into Ernest, and he
wanted to know why I married you instead of him. He was horrible,
calling you a redskin and suggesting that you won’t do anything
better than print newspapers.” Even the reminder of the encounter
brought heat to her cheeks. “Then I came home, and Aunt Erin said
that Ernest’s views aren’t much different from what most people
think. I don’t recall hearing anyone saying crude things about you.
Have you noticed anything?”

“Your aunt is right,” he softly admitted. “I
didn’t tell you because I wanted to be with you. I didn’t want you
to feel guilty. It was my choice to be here. I know what white
people think of me. But I have you, and that is what matters.”

“How do they treat you at the paper?”

“They are good to me.”

“Really?” She shot him a worried look. “You
aren’t just saying that to make me feel better?”

He smiled. “No. I tell you the truth.”

She relaxed. “That’s good. But when does it
happen?”

“On the street when I pass someone by who
does not like having an Indian in town. I got used to the looks and
comments.”

“What comments?”

“Things like I need to be watched—”

“Watched? Why do you need to be watched?”

“People fear I will steal something.”

Her hands tightened around his. “That’s
ridiculous. You wouldn’t steal something!”

“Julia, calm down.”

She struggled to relax her hold on him. “They
think you’d steal something because you’re Indian?”

“People have ideas about Indians. We cannot
make them think something else. They must get there on their own.
We live as peaceably as we can and hope for the best.”