Breaking the Governess’s Rules (10 page)

‘Miss Blandish is to have a Season?’ Lord Furniss asked.

‘New money, Rupert,’ Miss Daphne said. ‘Your mother would never approve, even if Miss Blandish does have a well-trimmed ankle.’

‘Am I a slave to my mother? And upon my soul, I never said anything about Miss Blandish’s ankle! I remain loyal to Miss Sibson.’ Lord Furniss clasped his hand to his heart. ‘Miss Sibson, you must—’

Louisa concentrated on the Psyche cameos. ‘Lord Furniss, this is not the time or place, but know you have my lasting friendship.’

‘Thank you.’ Lord Furniss bowed his head. ‘I always treasure your friendship.’

Louisa simply looked at Jonathon and dared him to say something untoward. He arched his brow as if the exchange amused him.

‘Your wish is my command, Miss Daphne. The Blandishes will be invited,’ Jonathon said. ‘I, too, found Miss Nella a charming conversationalist. The Grange has not seen a house party for a long time.’

Louisa crossed her arms and longed to wipe the self-satisfied expression from his face. A house party indeed! He would be on his knees, begging her forgiveness before the party was finished.

She looked forward to being the one to administer the lesson in humility. She was never going to go back to the girl she once was, yet she found it impossible to silence the little voice inside that whispered perhaps she was wrong. Perhaps, Jonathon Fanshaw was a different man to the one she had known all those years ago. Ruthlessly Louisa silenced it.

Y
ou are a different person. You are. You have changed. You will not have feelings for Jonathon. You will survive this ordeal. You survived before.

Her boots pounded out the message as Louisa strode towards the Chemist. When she’d been in Sorrento amongst the lemon groves and watching the sparkling water with Mount Vesuvius towering over the Bay of Naples, it had been easy to think about what might happen if they ever met again and how she’d show him that she had changed. But now she was not sure. Jonathon seemed insistent that she was the same.

After her encounter with Jonathon, the walls pressed in and Louisa knew she had to leave the house in Charlotte Square and clear her head. She always thought better whilst walking rather than whilst sitting still.

With Jonathon Fanshaw, she needed her head even clearer than she had when he was Jonathon Ponsby-Smythe. That Jonathon she had understood with his boyish enthusiasms and impulses. This Jonathon was
new, thoughtful and considering. Somehow she suspected he had known about Miss Daphne and Chesterholm and had intended to invite them both all along.

It bothered
her
that she even cared what he thought and that thinking about him was taking up more and more of her time.

A great mass of humanity seethed around her—shawl-clad factory girls, flat-capped boys pushing barrows and harassed mothers with children hanging off their skirts. All about her the lilting accent of the northeast, so very different from the sounds of her native Warwickshire, but they were speaking English instead of Italian and somehow it was comforting. Her throat closed. It was a small thing, but she had missed the background chatter in her native language.

A man barged into her, causing her to stumble. ‘You should watch what you are on about. Dreaming your life away.’

Louisa clutched her reticule tighter and hurried on. Dreaming. Once she had spent her life with her head in the clouds. She had sworn never again.

Beside the chemist stood a booking office with various notices in the window advertising excursions and destinations home and abroad. It would be so easy to book a steamer back to Sorrento. Louisa’s throat closed. Jonathon would not follow.

Louisa shook her head. In many ways, she remained the naïve girl of four years ago. Jonathon would follow and would make her life a misery.

She turned her back on the booking office. It was time to slay her demons. She was through with paying
for her mistake. This time she was going to fight for the life she had worked so hard to regain.

Louisa turned and spied a woman carrying a valise. Her clothes were neat, but there was a wild look about her face and hair. Louisa’s heart squeezed as she recognised the look. Not so very long ago she had stood on the quayside in Naples with the exact same expression of utter hopelessness and then people had turned their backs. She had always vowed if ever given the chance, she would assist rather than condemn.

‘Is something wrong?’ Louisa asked in a quiet voice.

The woman fumbled for a handkerchief. Silently Louisa handed her one from her reticule. ‘I made a mistake. I …’

She dissolved into great noisy tears.

‘It is a man and now he has left you,’ Louisa said with sudden certainty.

‘How did you guess?’ The woman stopped midsob. ‘Is it that obvious? Does my wickedness show? My grandma always said that it would.’

‘It is generally a man who causes those sorts of tears. They promise you the moon and stars, but leave you before the sun rises.’

‘He said that he’d take me to Gretna Green, but we went to Newcastle instead and I discovered he already has a wife, plus three bairns.’ The woman looked at her with tear-stained eyes and reddened nose.

A wife and children.
Louisa swallowed hard. How simply dreadful for this woman. Jonathon had only been promised to another.

‘Do you have somewhere to go?’

Louisa’s mind raced. She could hardly ask Miss Daphne to help. They had more than enough staff. Leaving the woman stranded on the street corner where she’d be prey for all the various ne’er-do-wells was unthinkable.

The woman shook her head and her blonde ringlets bobbed about her plump face. ‘I can’t stay in Newcastle. I keep thinking that somehow they will know about what I have done and they will whisper about me. They say that it clings to your skirts. I am willing to work, but who will hire a wicked woman for honest work? I have no references.’

Louisa closed her eyes, remembering the feeling of hopelessness.

‘They won’t. They are more interested in selling tickets. Think about how many hundreds of people go through that booking office.’ She paused, trying to get her thoughts in order. ‘Is it the expense you are worried about it?’

‘I have money. Me mam guessed what I was on about and she slipped me some money when me da wasn’t looking. One of my aunts—well, she was in difficulties when she was young. Left high and dry, like.’ The woman twisted her handkerchief. ‘Me da warned me that I would come to a bad end, just like she did, and on no account to come back if I left. He will turn his back on me and cast me out, if I go back.’

‘Have you ever thought about going back? Perhaps they will have a change of heart. Blood counts for something.’

The woman wiped the tears from her eyes and appeared to consider the request. ‘No, I can’t do it. Not
with me da. He uses his fists and asks questions later. I met a woman a while back and she said if I was to get in trouble that I could go to her. She might find me a job. She used to work at the castle and looks after pretty doves. She appeared to be a kind sort.’

Louisa pressed her lips together. The young woman was naïve. She knew exactly the sort of job that kind elderly woman had in mind—selling the young woman’s body.

‘Shall I go in with you?’ Louisa offered. She could not do much, but a little advice could go a long way. ‘You know, I discovered that it is best to actually see where you are to work before you do. Sometimes people try to trick you and you end up having to do things that you did not bargain for.’

‘They do?’ The woman’s nose wrinkled, but her eyes grew wide with astonishment. ‘I never thought of such a thing. She seemed such a nice person, but now that I think on it, she kept touching my cheek.’

‘Do you have enough to purchase a return ticket?’ Louisa continued. ‘Just in case the job is not what you think it is. They might take your money, but a ticket is easier to conceal.’

‘That’s a bonny idea. I wish I were clever enough to have thought of that.’

Helping the woman to purchase her ticket took no more than a few moments, but it brought back so many memories. Louisa gritted her teeth. How she wished someone had taken the time to help her. But she had survived on her own and she would do so again. This time, though, she refused to run. She would fight for her life and her future.

‘Ah, here I find you. You were true to your word about the chemist.’

Louisa controlled the sudden race of her pulse. Jonathon. And it was not a coincidence. She pasted a smile on her face. He might have bested her in the first round, but she would refuse to give in.

‘Miss Daphne needs her tincture. After this morning’s excitement, Miss Daphne requires rest. I lost Miss Mattie earlier this year and I do not intend to lose Miss Daphne.’

‘You care about her.’

‘Of course I do. It is the only reason I returned to England. Miss Daphne is family.’ Louisa brushed Jonathon’s hand from her elbow. ‘Now, if you will excuse me, you must find someone else to spy on. I have a tincture to purchase.’

‘I was not spying on you. I was visiting a pawnbroker.’ He nodded towards the shop where a trio of gold balls hung. A variety of items were displayed in the window.

‘Are you let in the pockets?’ Louisa gaped at Jonathon. There was nothing about him to indicate that he was short of money—quite the opposite. His expensively cut frockcoat, silver-topped cane and the intricately tied neckcloth screamed discreet wealth.

‘Hardly.’ The faintest hint of a smile touched his lips. ‘Chesterholm has suffered a series of thefts in recent months. Several of the items turned up in Newcastle. I have been visiting other pawnbrokers in the area to put the word out.’

‘Have you caught the thief?’

‘He and his accomplice have escaped so far.’ He
frowned. ‘I will catch the thief in time. Whoever it was will regret tangling with me.’

A small shiver went down Louisa’s spine at the determination in his face. ‘I have no time for those who steal. Even when I was starving and could find no work, I never stole.’

‘How did you survive?’

‘I sold my hair.’

‘You did what!’ The colour drained from his face. ‘Your hair… You considered it to be your crowning glory. You were determined to have it as long as possible. Cutting your hair would weaken you.’

‘Foolish notions vanish when faced with reality,’ Louisa said quickly before she lost her nerve. Jonathon had to understand what she had gone through and how she would never have voluntarily cut her hair. ‘Selling my hair was preferable to selling my body. Without references people were not willing to take a chance on a governess.’

‘But you went back to my stepmother. She paid for your passage to Italy. Did you sell your hair there?’

‘In England. It was only after the money was gone that I went back seeking your whereabouts and your stepmother paid my passage to get rid of me. She did not want me disrupting your impending nuptials.’ Louisa hugged her arms about her waist. It was as much of an explanation as he deserved.

Jonathon stared at her in astonishment. ‘You are joking. Your hair is long now. You have it done up in a crown of plaits.’

‘I would never joke about the matter.’ She gave a mental sigh. Jonathon probably did not even remember
how proud she had been of her hair. ‘You should have seen me with short curls. It was quite fetching, very Roman in a way. The summer is so hot in Italy that short hair helped a great deal.’

There was no answering smile from Jonathon. If anything, his face became more creased and concerned. ‘Did it hurt you very much?’

Louisa blinked rapidly. He did remember. He was not supposed to remember the little details. She clutched her reticule tighter to her bosom. ‘Having your hair cut does not hurt, Lord Chesterholm.’

‘Once you thought otherwise.’ A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. ‘When I cut a lock of your hair for a keepsake, you yelped.’

‘And then you kissed me to ease the pain,’ Louisa whispered. The corners of her mouth tingled with anticipation.

‘Yes, that’s right.’ He looked down at her. His eyes softened and deepened, glowing with a warm light. The crowds faded to background noise until it was the two of them standing there, just looking at each other.

Louisa blinked and dragged her mind back from that moment, forced herself to remember the afterwards part rather than the spun-glass bubble dream.

‘It was that kiss that gave us away. Or so your stepmother claimed. Her maid, Lily, spotted us.’ A bitter laugh escaped her throat. ‘Even if I had not gone with you that day, she had planned to dismiss me. We were living on borrowed time. But your stepmother was correct—I had betrayed her trust.’

‘That was never its intention,’ he said quietly.

‘I weathered the storm.’ Louisa kept her head up and
ignored the great hole opening up inside of her. She was not going to cry. It was somehow worse having Jonathon being kind. ‘My hair grew far quicker than I could have imagined. They would have cut it anyway when I had the fever in Naples.’

‘You were ill?’

‘For a while. It was how Miss Mattie discovered me and took me under her wing.’