Breathe Again (12 page)

I was done with work by noon the next
Saturday, so I went up to change quickly before heading out to meet Jackson in
Ojai. He’d left me his BMW to drive up there since he had to be on set by six
that morning. He didn’t mind at all; it meant he had an excuse to drive his
other, far more
exciting
(and ostentatious) car.

It was the middle of fall and ridiculously hot outside, so I
chose to wear a light dress and sandals to stay comfortable. It was simple, but
still pretty, with soft ivory fabric and a flared skirt. It was too hot to wear
my hair down, so I just pulled it into a low, messy bun on the back of my head.
I wanted to look pretty for Jackson, of course, but also because I didn’t know
who I would meet or see while I visited him.

The drive only took about an hour, since there was no traffic
on the way north. I couldn’t help but drive a little fast; I was excited to see
Jackson, and his car was too much fun not to drive it a little recklessly.

I couldn’t help but notice how absolutely gorgeous the
surroundings were when I got off the main highway and followed the directions
to the set. It was beautiful and green, with sprawling hills and trees
everywhere. It was no surprise that the director had chosen this particular
location for his movie.

Jackson had told me he was putting my name on the set’s list,
so there shouldn’t have been any problem getting in. Since it was an off-site
location, the set just had a few security guards and a temporary fence up to
keep people out. The film was an independent, so filming hadn’t garnered too
much attention. I noticed a few younger girls with signs for Jackson near the
makeshift entrance, and a couple photographers, but the set wasn’t too terribly
exciting at the moment. I’m sure things got much more interesting when the
stars were actually arriving and leaving.

I parked outside the fence and grabbed the box of treats I
brought with me from the café. I knew that Meredith would be on set today as
well, since her husband was the director. I hadn’t seen her since the cake
incident and I wanted to personally deliver some of her favorite éclairs to
her.

None of those waiting outside for Jackson really paid much
attention to me as I walked up to the gate, for which I was thankful. I had no
idea if that would change once we made our relationship public, but I didn’t
want to think about it just then. This weekend was for relaxing, before all the
craziness began.

I got to the gate and flashed a smile at the guard on duty.
He was playing a game on his phone and wasn’t really paying attention to me.
According to Jackson, they hadn’t had too much trouble with people trying to
get on set, so it didn’t surprise me.

“Hi,” I said to the guard, who barely looked in my direction.
“I’m here to see Jackson Traver; he told me my name was going to be on your
list.”

The guard, who was probably in his late twenties, just
smirked at me. “Sure,” he said, rolling his tongue in his mouth and checking me
out. I was getting annoyed, but the gate was closed and locked; I couldn’t get
in unless I either climbed the fence or dealt with him. “Name?”

“Melanie Devlin. It may be under Mellie Devlin,” I said.

He barely glanced at the clipboard in his hand before shaking
his head. “Sorry honey, you’re not on here.”

I frowned. “Can you check again? Jackson is expecting me.”

The guard didn’t even try to hide his laughter, and I felt my
cheeks redden. “Yeah, you and those other crazy ladies out there,” he said,
motioning to where the small group of women gathered with their signs. I looked
in their direction and felt my heart plummet. There were only a few of them,
but I knew I didn’t belong over there. I never would have fawned over a
celebrity I knew I’d never have, wasting my time hoping to get a glimpse of
him.

The women were watching us now, as we argued about whether or
not I was supposed to be there. Finally, I just stalked back toward the car and
placed the box of pastries on the trunk. I fished my cell phone out of my purse
and dialed Jackson’s number.

He had a break from two to four that afternoon, which is why
he’d suggested that I visit him on set. I wasn’t so sure, but he was adamant;
he wanted me to meet Blake, the director, and his costar Lucy.

Jackson picked up on the first ring. “Why aren’t you here
yet? I told Heather to have security call her when you got here, so I could
come get you.”

I frowned, unsure what to say. “Um, they say my name isn’t on
their list.”

“What?”

“I’m here in the parking lot, and the guard won’t let me in.
He says my name isn’t on the list. Maybe you can send Heather out here to let
me in?”

In the background, I could hear a door open and the sounds of
other people. “I’m coming to get you.”

“What? No!” I said quickly, eyeing the women in the lot, who
were once again oblivious to my presence. “Just send Heather out here or have
someone else call to let me in. You don’t need to come out here.”

“Stop, Mellie. I’m almost there.” He hung up on me.

I dropped my phone in my bag and rubbed my temples. I really
didn’t want all these women, or girls, really, fawning all over my boyfriend.
This was supposed to be my relaxing weekend. I should have just told Jackson
I’d meet him at the villa later on instead.

I made my way back to where the guard was still playing with
his phone. He looked up and smirked at me again.

“You gonna try and sweet-talk me into letting you in here
now? Because I can take my break and get you behind that tree over there,” he
said, jerking his head to the left, toward a clearing surrounded by some tall
oak trees. “I think I may be able to find your name after that.”

I nearly gagged. He was seriously suggesting that if we fool
around, he’d let me in. That was disgusting.

I was never one to think on my feet quickly enough to form
sharp or witty comebacks in situations like this, but I didn’t need to.

“I’m going to pretend for the next thirty seconds that I
didn’t actually hear you propositioning my girlfriend, just so that I don’t
kill you right here, but I can’t guarantee I won’t snap your neck if you don’t
open this gate right now.” Jackson’s voice was so cold that it gave me the
chills. I was too busy trying not to vomit at the guy’s proposal to notice
Jackson as he walked up behind him.

The guard stood quickly, dropping his phone in the dirt.

“Uh, Mr. Traver,” he stuttered. “I didn’t mean to say it that
way, I’m sorry.” Jackson wouldn’t let him continue, just held up his hand to
stop him.

“Open the fucking gate. Now.” Jackson’s glare wasn’t
murderous or violent; it was cold, detached.

The guard just nodded and fumbled with his keys before
opening the gate. By this time, Jackson’s fan club had finally realized what
was going on, and they rushed over. Jackson pulled me through the gate before
they could get through too, leaving them on the other side of the fence.

“Oh my god, I love you, Jackson!”

“Please, please let me give you my number. Nobody loves you
like I do, I swear.”

“You are so sexy, Jackson, I want to have your babies. Please
marry me!”

God, these women were psychotic.

Jackson put his arm around me and turned us to walk onto the
lot, back to where the trailers were parked. I looked back and saw them
literally holding on to the fence, screaming at us. There were no more than six
or seven, but their screeching hurt my ears. I closed my eyes, all too willing
to let Jackson lead the way. I needed to get out of there.

We didn’t stop until we were actually at Jackson’s trailer
and he pulled me up the stairs. He closed the door behind me and had me in his
arms immediately.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispered into my hair, rocking me
back and forth. I squeezed my eyes shut, my emotions all over the place. I
didn’t want to overreact, especially since I knew that this was only the
beginning. I focused on my breathing instead, and let myself count to ten in my
head before pulling away.

I plastered a smile on my face. “You don’t need to apologize,
Jackson. It’s nothing.”

Jackson’s smile was reluctant, but once he realized that I
wasn’t falling apart or upset, he pulled me back to him and kissed me.

“I missed you,” he said, pulling away from my mouth for only
a second before diving back in. It made me giggle.

I let myself get lost in him for a few minutes, wrapping my
arms around his neck and pulling myself close. For some strange reason, I knew
that this was it. This was the end of the way it had been, just the two of us.

It was the girls outside. They didn’t know Jackson, at least
not the way that I knew him. I knew I was being silly, letting them bother me
like that. He was one fine specimen of a human being, as Josephine had said
once. I couldn’t blame them for their attraction, but they didn’t love him.

Jackson pulled away this time, reluctantly. “Hey, I wanted to
show you the set and introduce you to a few people. If I don’t stop now, I’ll
just spend the next half hour of my break mauling you in my trailer. As appealing
as that sounds, you didn’t drive an hour just for me to do that.”

I pouted and Jackson laughed, kissing my hair while pulling
me out of the trailer. It was pretty quiet out, since they were working on a
scene farther out in the trees with Lucy and Sophia, who were playing sisters
in the movie. I was excited to meet Lucy Morgan, who was a good friend of
Jackson’s, though not so much Sophia. I was still a little bitter about what
I’d seen on the TV the day Jackson got back from Europe.

We did find Meredith, however, who was sitting in the shade
and reading a book. Her husband was out filming with the rest of the crew.
Other than that, there were people on site just milling about, ignoring Jackson
and me as we made our way to where Meredith sat next to one of the trailers.
She was bigger than the last time I’d seen her, much bigger. It looked like she
might pop any day now.

“Jackson, sweetheart,” she exclaimed, pulling herself and her
big belly out of the chair she’d been relaxing in. She gave him a kiss on either
cheek, then flashed me a smile. “And if it isn’t my favorite baker! How are you
doing, love?” She pulled me in for a kiss on either cheek as well, though her
stomach got in the way. I was surprised by the affection; it was obvious that
Jackson had told her about us.

“We’re good, Meredith,” Jackson said, pulling me to his side.
“I just wanted to bring Mellie by to say hello.”

“Of course!” she said. “I do hope the two of you are coming
to dinner with us tonight. Blake has reserved the back room at Ottavia, and you
two are invited, of course.”

Jackson glanced at me. I had no idea they were planning on
dinner. “Actually, I think we were going to do dinner on our own, but thanks
for thinking of us.” Meredith frowned.

“You know that Blake will want to meet Mellie, officially of
course. And Sophia and Lucy will be there, along with Gavin and Levi. It would
be fun, you should come!”

Jackson smiled. “Thanks, Mer, but I think we’ll pass. We
don’t get much time together these days, and she drove all the way up. I was
just hoping I’d get to introduce her to everyone this afternoon, but it seems
like they’re running a little late over there,” he said, nodding in the
direction of the trees.

“Well, if you change your mind, just let us know. There’s
plenty of space, and they’d all love to meet you, my dear,” she said, smiling
at me.

We chatted for a little longer before Jackson pulled me away
again, and showed me around the set. The movie they were filming was about a
couple on the run from the law, who end up taking shelter in a small cabin in
the middle of nowhere. It sounded intense, and I wasn’t so sure how I was going
to feel about the love scenes between Jackson and Sophia. I obviously hadn’t
said anything about it, but I knew that Jackson was aware. He’d tried to reassure
me a few times that there was nothing going on, that they were just friends and
filming love scenes was actually a lot more awkward and unpleasant than it
sounded. I wasn’t so sure I believed him, but I tried not to let it get to me.

Eventually Jackson’s name was called by one of the production
assistants, letting him know he was needed to start filming. We had just been
wandering along the edge of the trees, taking in the green that we didn’t see
so much of in Los Angeles. It really was beautiful.

“Head back to the hotel, and let them know that you’re there
for the villa. I’ve let them know personally that you’re coming in today,” he
said, kissing my forehead. “I’ll be back around six or so.”

I just nodded and smiled as he pulled me into his arms. I
don’t know that I’d ever get tired of being close to him.

He let me go and I reluctantly made my way back to the car.
The set had gotten a bit busier, and I tried to be invisible, hoping not to
bother any of the people working and chatting as I passed them. I was almost to
the trailers, when I noticed someone with a dark head of hair, watching me. I
wasn’t about to introduce myself to Sophia on my own, but I didn’t want to
ignore her either. I smiled in her direction, not pausing as I walked, but she
didn’t smile back. Instead, I saw her scowl before turning around and heading
into her trailer. So, there was that. Awesome.

The women flooded toward me when I got out of the gate. I
held my bag close as I made my way to the car.

“How do you know Jackson?” one asked, as I fished my keys
from my purse.

I wasn’t about to answer them, and it didn’t really seem like
they wanted an answer. They just kept yelling at me. One of them didn’t seem to
like me, and was swearing in my direction. I had a feeling the security guard
wasn’t about to break them up, so I just focused on my breathing while trying
desperately to keep my hands from shaking. Finally, I got the car unlocked and
pulled myself in quickly. I wanted to take a second to calm myself down, but
they were still outside the car. Thankfully, they didn’t try getting into my
car and they weren’t in front of it either. I turned the ignition on and pulled
out of the lot quickly. When I turned onto the dirt road, far enough away from
the women so they wouldn’t see me, I pulled over. I put my head on the steering
wheel and closed my eyes.