Brecht Collected Plays: 1: Baal; Drums in the Night; In the Jungle of Cities; Life of Edward II of England; & 5 One Act Plays: "Baal", "Drums in the Night", "In the Jungle of Ci (World Classics) (39 page)

Silence
.

SISTER
: I don’t feel thirsty any more.

FRIEND
: You shouldn’t take it that way. Cheers. It’s just a good story, that’s all.

BRIDE
quietly to the groom
: Well, I do think he might have spared us that vulgar rubbish.

GROOM
: Oh, if it makes him happy.

YOUNG MAN
: I think that’s a marvellous lighting arrangement.

MOTHER
: Don’t use a knife on your cake, Jacob.

FATHER
: How about our having a peep at your furniture?

BRIDE
: All right.

FRIEND
: It’s great, having those extra wide chairs. Room enough for two.

WIFE
: The legs are a bit thin.

YOUNG MAN
: Thin legs: that’s very classy.

WIFE
: Who told you that?

MOTHER
: Jacob, can’t you eat your cake with your fingers?

WIFE
gets up and walks round the room
: So that’s the sofa. It’s wide enough, but this kind of upholstery on top isn’t very practical. Still, seeing that you made it yourself …

BRIDE
stands up
: Don’t you think the cupboard’s pretty? Specially the inlay work. I don’t know; most people seem to have no feeling for that sort of thing. They just pay a bit of money for a bit of furniture, no soul or anything, merely in order to have a bit of furniture. But
we’ve
got our own things. Our own sweat’s gone into them, we love them, because we made them ourselves.

HUSBAND
: Come and sit down, woman.

WIFE
: What’s that supposed to mean? I want to see inside.

HUSBAND
: You don’t go looking into other people’s cupboards.

WIFE
: All I meant was – but then you always know better, don’t you? All right, then. The cupboard’s nothing special from the outside – people don’t have that kind of inlay work now; they have glass doors with coloured curtains – but it might be quite good inside, and that’s what I wanted to see.

HUSBAND
: All right, all right; now just sit down.

WIFE
: Oh, we’ve started talking like that, have we? You’ve had too much to drink again. I’m going to water it down, as your head’s so weak.

GROOM
: Go ahead if you want to look inside; I’m only too glad it interests you. Here’s the key. Open it up, Maria.

BRIDE
: I don’t know … Sure this is the right key? It won’t turn.

GROOM
: Give it here; it’s just a knack. I put the lock in myself too.
Tries it
. Shit! The bastard.
Angrily
. Bugger it!

BRIDE
: There you are, you can’t open it either.

GROOM
: Perhaps somebody tried to force it. It beats me.

WIFE
: Perhaps it’s not all that special inside. So why bother? It’s certainly a business getting the lock on this cupboard open. That’s something to be said against it.

HUSBAND
threateningly
: You come and sit down. That’s enough of that.

SISTER
: Oh no, now we’re on our feet, why don’t we dance?

YOUNG MAN
: Yes, let’s. We can push the table back.

GROOM
: Dance, that’s a good idea. But where’s the music to come from?

FRIEND
: I can play the guitar. It’s in the hall.
Goes and fetches it
.

All stand. The father and the husband go left and sit. They smoke. The groom and the young man lift the table and carry it to the right
.

YOUNG MAN
: Careful how you put it down.

GROOM
: Don’t bother. It’s got to take some knocks.
Puts it down heavily. One leg goes askew
. Now let’s dance.

YOUNG MAN
: Look, one of the legs has gone. You shouldn’t have put it down so hard.

BRIDE
: What has gone?

GROOM
: Nothing that matters. Let’s start dancing.

BRIDE
: Why can’t you look out what you’re doing?

WIFE
: Think of all that sweat that went into it. Proper glue might have been better.

GROOM
: Sharp tongue you’ve got. May I?

WIFE
: Don’t you want the first dance with your wife?

GROOM
: Of course. Come on, Maria.

BRIDE
: No, I want to dance with Hans.

SISTER
: Who am
I
to dance with, then?

BRIDE TO
husband
: Aren’t you dancing?

HUSBAND
: No. My wife’ll never let me hear the last of it if I do.

SISTER
: You ought to dance. Otherwise I’ve got to sit and watch.

HUSBAND
: It’s not fair if I don’t want to.
Gets up and gives her his arm
.

FRIEND
sits on the sofa with his guitar
: I can play a waltz.
Begins to play
.

They dance: the groom with the wife, the bride with the young man, the sister with the husband
.

WIFE
: Faster! Faster! It’s like a roundabout.
They dance quite fast, then stop
.

WIFE
: That’s what I call classy. Not bad dancing.
She sits heavily on the sofa. It cracks. The wife and the friend jump up
.

FRIEND
: It went crack.

WIFE
: Something’s broken. It’s my fault.

GROOM
: Doesn’t matter. I’ll mend it.

WIFE
: Yes, you know all about furniture. That’s the main thing.

BRIDE
: It must have been
too
fast for you to make you come down like that.

WIFE
: Yes, that husband of yours does swing one round.

SISTER
: Didn’t you enjoy it?

HUSBAND
: Today I did. Oh yes.

WIFE
: You should watch that heart of yours.

HUSBAND
: You worried?

WIFE
: I have to carry the can always.

GROOM
: Shall we sit down again?

BRIDE
to the friend
: You play wonderfully.

FRIEND
: It’s easy when I see you dancing.

GROOM
: Cut the chatter. Let’s sit down. How did
you
like that dance?

YOUNG MAN
: Very much. Aren’t we going to go on?

GROOM
: No.

FATHER
: Can’t we have some wine? Helps the conversation.

GROOM
: Let’s just put the table back in the middle.
Does so, helped by the young man
. But carefully this time.
The mother brings wine. The chairs are pushed back, and all sit
.

WIFE
: Sing something. I love it when people sing.

FRIEND
: I’m not much of a singer.

GROOM
: Doesn’t matter. Just sing so there’s some sort of entertainment.

WIFE
: My husband sings now and again. He can play the guitar too.

YOUNG MAN
: Oh yes, do play.

WIFE
: Here’s the guitar.

HUSBAND
: I’m too out of practice.

SISTER
: Go on, do.

HUSBAND
: Suppose I get stuck …

WIFE
: You always do.

SISTER
: Just once.

HUSBAND
: I might be able to, just once.

WIFE
: He used to play a lot, but since we’ve been together he’s stopped. He just concentrates on being a bore. He used to know a whole heap of songs, then he forgot most of them; there were less and less of them he could get through, he got stuck more and more often, you’d think he was going senile, till in the end he could only manage one single song. You’d better sing it now.

HUSBAND
: All right, I’ll sing it.
Tunes guitar, and begins, lively
:

The ghost of Liebenau, o hear!

Who many a …

Stops
.

Who many a … I don’t know … Now I’ve forgotten that one too … It was the only one I had left …

WIFE
: Senile.

GROOM
: Doesn’t matter. I can’t sing at all.

YOUNG MAN
: How about dancing a bit more?

FRIEND
: Yes, a good idea. Me too this time. You can play a waltz, can’t you? A major with the seventh. Please, Frau Maria, it’s my turn now.

WIFE
: I’ve had enough.

GROOM
: We’ll watch, then.

FATHER
: Maria dances nicely.

The bride and the friend dance
.

HUSBAND
strums guitar
: A major: there we are.

FRIEND
: You’re a wonderful dancer. Faster.

GROOM
: Don’t fall over, that’s all.

WIFE
to the groom
: Catch me dancing like that.

SISTER
: Could you?

WIFE
: Depends on the man.

FRIEND
breaking off
: It gets into your veins. Here’s your wife. She’s a classy dancer. May I have a drink, though?

FATHER
: Why don’t we sit at the table again? Nobody can talk like this.

GROOM
: Yes, do sit down.
To the bride, quietly
: Unless you’d rather go on dancing?

BRIDE
: Let’s sit a different way this time.
To the friend
: You sit here. And do you mind sitting –
to the wife
– there?

The wife sits next to the groom
. Dad, you sit at the head.

GROOM
opening bottles
: Now, let’s drink. To comfort and cosiness.

YOUNG MAN
: In your own home.

FRIEND
: That you made yourself.

FATHER
: Cheers. When you were in short skirts, Maria, you had a drop of wine once. Your grandfather was delighted. He wanted you to dance, but you went to sleep instead.

WIFE
: So you’d better not drink today, eh?

HUSBAND
: I’ve never seen anyone dance better.

FRIEND
: I’m in smashing form now. It was a bit sticky here earlier. Apart from that, wonderful.
Gets up
: What the …?

Looks at the chair
. There’s something caught here.

BRIDE
: Have you hurt yourself?

FRIEND
: A splinter.

GROOM
: Doesn’t matter.

FRIEND
: The chair doesn’t. But those are my best trousers.

GROOM
: Do you mean to say you put them on in my honour?

FRIEND
: Yes; but now I’m going to sing.

GROOM
: Don’t if you don’t really want to.

FRIEND
taking the guitar
: But I do want to.

GROOM
: I mean, if you feel put out …

FRIEND
: I’m not put out.

GROOM
: On account of your trousers.

FRIEND
: Set that off against the dance.

FATHER
: There’s a providence rough-hews our ends. That was another of Forst’s sayings.

FRIEND
sings the ‘Ballad of Chastity in a Major Key’
:

See them melting with desire!

Mine! he thought. If she is free.

And the darkness fanned their fire.

And she thought: just him and me.

And he said: ‘I’ll never hurt you.’

Not a girl of easy virtue

And she didn’t want to be.

Oh, their fingers’ sweet sensations

As with beating heart she lay!

What about his hesitations?

Each of them could only pray.

And he said: ‘I mustn’t hurt you.’

Not a girl of easy virtue

(Not yet having learnt the way …)

Sooner than profane that moment

Off he went to find a tart

Who could teach him what to come meant

Helping nature out with art.

But he found the pace was killing:

Once he had been very willing

Now he swore to stay apart.

Still red-hot, but still unsullied

Quick release was now
her
prayer

So she found herself a solid

Chap who simply didn’t care.

(And who beat her something horrid

Laying her across the stair.)

Being manhandled rejoiced her -

Not for her the holy cloister -

And at last the urge was there.

So he sees his hesitation

To have been entirely right:

Thinks it was by inspiration

That he spared her that May night.

She’s all vice now, he’s all virtue:

Each is anxious to alert you

Not to play with dynamite.

The wife laughs
.

GROOM
: I know that one. One of your best songs.
To the wife
: Did you like it? I’ll go and get some wine.

FRIEND
: Yes, it is good. Specially the moral.
To the bride
: Did you like it?

BRIDE
: I’m not sure I understood it.

WIFE
: Anyway, it wasn’t meant for you.

FATHER
anxiously
: Where’s Ina?

BRIDE
: Don’t ask me.

GROOM
: Herr Mildner’s missing too. Why was he asked, anyway?