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Authors: Ilsa Evans

BOOK: Broken
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Tracey brought in two large crystal gravy boats and placed them carefully on the table, using a finger to dab up a thick droplet dribbling down the outside of one gravy boat and then licking it. Mattie folded the cutlery tea-towel and took it through to the kitchen.

‘Back, back!' Lorna met her in the doorway, carrying a large platter on which the beef sat, deep brown and shiny with juices, alongside an electric carving knife and fork. ‘Nothing to do in there now, so grab a seat, love!'

Mattie waited till she passed and then put her tea-towel down on the bench and washed her hands before going back through to the games room. She was followed by the men, who were still discussing the football match.

‘They're lost without Buckley, though.'

‘Ought to clone the man.'

‘I dunno. Reckon some of those young guns are gonna make a fair difference.'

‘True. True.'

The children's table was already full by the time Mattie got back to the games room. Having obviously washed rather cursorily under the garden tap, they sat and flicked water off their hands at each other, shrieking merrily. Max and Courtney were flanked by Dana's youngest son, Sam, who was just a little older than Max, and Sandy's four-year-old twins, an almost identical pair of brown-haired girls clad in matching pinafore dresses and red-chequered ribbons. A place was also set for the small boy who had cannoned into Mattie earlier, but he was currently leaning against his mother's chair at the larger table and whining fretfully.

Mattie hung back until Jake came in and then pulled out a chair next to him. On her left was Dana, then Frank and Mitchell, with Lorna and Sandy sitting at the end. On the other side of the table, from Sandy up, were Mark, Garth, Tracey, and then her son, who had now taken an adult's seat, with Joshua at the far corner. And, at the head of the table and already expertly carving the beef, was Bill, in his element. Jessica came in last, looking around for a spare seat and realising that the only empty one was next to her grandfather.

‘Come sit next to me, love,' Bill said jovially as he concentrated on the beef. ‘We'll be beauty and the beast.'

‘Sure, Grandad.' Jessica pulled out the chair and sat down, rolling her eyes expressively as she and her cousin Joshua exchanged glances.

‘Not too bad so far?' asked Jake in a low voice, smiling at Mattie.

‘No.' Mattie looked around quickly to make sure nobody was listening. ‘I'll live.'

‘Glad to hear it.'

‘Hey Jake, Mattie. Have you heard our news?' asked Sandy, passing a water jug across to Mark.

‘You've won Tattslotto?'

‘Not that good,' Sandy grinned. ‘No, Mark and I are getting married!'

‘Well, it's about time!'Jake beamed at them both. ‘Good on you!'

‘Yes, congratulations,' added Mattie. ‘That's wonderful.'

‘Thought I'd better make an honest woman of her,' said Mark, with mock resignation.

‘Better late than never,' said Bill, without humour. The carving knife whirred as he sliced thick segments of beef and angled them neatly atop each other on the platter as well as on two separate dinner plates.

Sandy ignored her father. ‘And I'm expecting again!'

‘Not another set of twins?'

‘Christ, don't jinx us!' Mark rolled his eyes.

‘When are you due?' asked Mattie curiously ‘And when's the wedding?'

‘The baby – note the
singular
– ‘Sandy grinned at her brother before continuing –'is due in March and we've set the wedding for May. The girls are going to be bridesmaids. Mum's making them matching outfits.'

‘They'll look gorgeous,' said Dana, with a fond glance at her twin nieces, who were giggling at Sam and Max. Both boys had laid their serviettes on top of their heads and were blowing energetically at each other, trying to dislodge the paper hats.

‘Help yourselves!' announced Bill grandly, flicking the carving knife off and laying it down by his plate after it had stuttered to a stop. He
passed one dinner plate of sliced beef to Jake and the other to Joshua. Then he proceeded to help himself off the platter, which held several slices as well as the leftover knob of roast beef, a deep brownish-red in the centre.

The vegetables were also being passed around and Mattie was just taking some roast potatoes when Lisa, Joshua's mother, came into the room. Although younger than Dana, she looked by far the oldest of the sisters. She was the only one, apart from Jake, to have inherited her father's deep grooves on either side of her mouth and, on her, they were emphasised by a matching furrow between the eyes and a somewhat sallow complexion instead of the standard Hampton glow. Today her dark brown hair was pulled back into a low ponytail and she had obviously come straight from work as she was still wearing a pea-green tunic top with
Hampton Hardware
embroidered in red cotton on one breast pocket.

‘Hey all.' Lisa leant against the back of her son's chair and ruffled his hair. ‘And hello, Jake, Mattie. Long time, no see.'

‘It hasn't been
that
long,' protested Jake.

‘Almost three months,' said his mother placidly, turning so that she could hold one of the dinner plates of beef by the children's table while they helped themselves.

‘So where's your better half?' asked Jake.

‘John's not feeling well,' replied Lisa, staring down at her son's head.

‘Busy?' asked Bill, fixing Lisa with a firm eye.

‘Off and on. Had a bit of a rush around ten-ish. A bloke came in to see you about his chainsaw. I told him to come back Monday.' Lisa glanced around. ‘What, no seat for me?'

‘Certainly there is,' said her mother with a frown. ‘I counted them out. . . oh, that's why. Tracey's youngster is at the table. Tracey, would you mind moving him, dear? There's a space down at the children's table. I'm sure he'll enjoy himself more there.'

‘Don't want to!' The boy, who was about three or four years of age and a sturdy child, slid to the end of his chair so that he could grab the side of the table.

‘Can't we get another chair in for Lisa?' pleaded Tracey.

‘No,' replied Bill shortly, looking expressionlessly at her son. ‘There's no room.'

‘But he's shy, aren't you, sweetheart?' Tracey looked down at the boy who answered by clutching on to the table even more firmly.

‘Garth?' Bill glanced over at his nephew and raised his eyebrows questioningly.

Garth, who had been happily eating his meal, looked at his fiancée with irritation. ‘Come on, Trace. Move the kid.'

Tracey, her mouth set in a thin line, attempted to pry her son loose from the table, but as soon as she freed one hand and went to work on the other, the freed hand simply latched on once more. By this time everybody else, except Garth, was watching with fascination. Even Courtney had come over from the children's table and was standing behind her mother's chair, enthralled by the proceedings.

‘Is he spoilt?' Courtney whispered to Mattie, rather loudly.

‘Certainly is,' Dana answered instead. ‘Absolutely rotten.'

Finally Tracey gave up and slapped the boy's hands hard with embarrassed frustration. He immediately let out a howl of indignation and, releasing the table at last, slapped his mother right back, straight across the face. There was an almost communal drawing in of breath from the watchers. Then Garth, laying down his cutlery with visible annoyance, rose from his chair and strode over to the boy, grasping him under each arm and hauling him upwards. The boy, shocked into silence, hung with his mouth open as Garth carried him out in front, as if he were contagious, over to the children's table. There he held the child over the spare seat and then let him go. The boy fell onto the chair, hard, and then toppled off onto the floor where he sprawled, crying loudly.

‘Garth!
' exclaimed Tracey, who had stood up on the other side of the table to watch, horrified.

‘Enough!' Garth turned from her to the boy and pointed his finger at him. ‘As for
you
, you can get up onto that chair and eat your lunch. And I don't want to hear another peep out of you, understand?'

The boy, still sitting on the floor, drew a ragged breath but didn't answer.

'Understand?'

Mattie turned away so she couldn't see the boy's final capitulation, although it was inevitable. She stared down at her meal rather miserably. Although she agreed that the child's behaviour was disgraceful, she didn't condone Garth's actions at all. How could the boy ever learn not to use aggression when that was the very tool used to discipline him?

‘Needs a good clip around the ears,' commented Bill, without bothering to lower his voice.

Garth returned to the table and sat down heavily in his chair, picking up his cutlery and turning to Tracey, who had tears in her own eyes.
'Now
can I eat my meal?'

‘Please yourself,' she replied sulkily.

‘Next time I think I'll bring my own chair,' said Lisa brightly as she pulled out the now spare seat and sat down. She turned to Tracey, who was staring at her plate. ‘Sorry Trace, I didn't mean to cause such a fuss.'

‘S'okay' replied Tracey, without looking up.

Courtney, still standing behind her mother, leant forward and gave Mattie a hug, as if she sensed her mother needed one. Mattie smiled at her daughter appreciatively and watched as she went back over to the children's table, sitting down in her seat between the twins.

Lorna passed Tracey's son his plate of food and he sat on his chair before it, poking at the meat miserably. A bubble of yellowy mucus formed in one nostril as he breathed, popping and then reforming again with the next breath. Mattie grimaced and turned away, wiping her hands down her jeans automatically. The conversation at the larger table was now revolving around the benefits of advertising at an upcoming tractor pull, so Mattie concentrated on eating her meal. The sooner they were all finished here, the sooner this whole day could end.

When she'd first met the extended Hampton clan and was enveloped in their sense of family, Mattie had been overjoyed. They were vastly different to anything she'd known and, it seemed to her at the time, vastly superior. Demonstrative, tactile and generous to a fault, they immediately and wholeheartedly embraced her as one of their own, despite their disappointment in Jake's choices. Blood ties were all important. And although Mattie found their gregarious gatherings rather overwhelming, she rejoiced to be included amongst them, feeling a deep
sense of appreciation that when she and Jake had children, they would enjoy such a sense of belonging also.

But over time she came to realise that the family, for all its inclu-siveness and overt affection, had stringent rules in place that were non-negotiable – and that she found difficult to adhere to, or even witness. The fundamental rule that underpinned all others was that the structure of their lives revolved around their gender. It was not only the strict division of labour, but a sense of expectations that fortified their relationships with each other. Men were allowed certain liberties and were awarded a position within the household not on merit, but purely on the basis of their maleness. Men ‘worked', while women ‘kept house'. And even those who did work outside the home, like Lisa, would still be expected to clear the table and wash the dishes after this lunch, while the men retired to the lounge-room to drink beer and watch a rerun of the footy.

Mattie's own mother had also done the lion's share of the housework, but there had been a major difference. It was perceived, without ever being formally verbalised, that such work was a
job
, rather than a role in life. It was simply part of her contract with her husband – he worked outside the home and she worked within it, thus creating a functional environment within which to raise their family And when they took their annual holiday to Rosebud, to set up home in a seaside caravan for a fortnight, her father would immediately pitch in and do dishes, or cook meals, or take the two girls down to the beach to let their mother have a rest. It was seen as shared labour, rather than innate characteristics.

Whereas the Hampton women did all the cooking and cleaning and childminding no matter whether their husbands were working or not.

Lisa's deadbeat husband John hadn't worked for the past five years, yet Lisa was always complaining, with increasing bitterness, that she would rush home from work to cook the entire evening meal, tidy the house and even prepare a lunch for him to heat up at midday the following day. It was, quite simply, women's work, and no self-respecting male would ever voluntarily participate. Mattie knew, from long experience, that after lunch today, the women would congregate in the kitchen
to wash dishes and chatter and put away the leftovers. Children's faces would be washed, babies fed, and advice offered on everything from infant colic to sex appeal. And any male over the age of twelve who entered, for whatever reason, would be teased mercilessly before retreating quickly to the sanctity of the lounge-room where, similarly, any female who made herself comfortable amongst the men whilst the others toiled was viewed with uniform disapproval by both sexes.

And Mattie found it all extremely unfair, and restrictive, and hypocritical – and she didn't want her own children raised that way. She wanted Courtney to see the sky as her limit, and Max to have an equal partnership with his own wife one day She didn't want them to act like Jake did. At home he was known to change nappies and wash dishes and perform a range of household chores, but he reverted the minute he walked through the Hampton front door. And made jokes about the ‘little woman', and being ‘henpecked' and about who ‘wore the trousers in
this
family'.

Mattie glanced over at the children's table and was pleased to see Max cutting up the little boy's beef for him. The child sat staring at him dully, both nostrils now clogged, as Max laid down the cutlery and looked at him expectantly. When nothing happened, Courtney reached across with an adult sigh and pushed the fork into the boy's hand, pressing his fingers closed around the handle. But he still didn't seem to get the message, picking up a piece of meat with his other hand and pushing it into his mouth instead. Courtney sighed again, crossly.

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