Broken (37 page)

"Wow, is that hard? I mean living with people
who can do all those things?"

Rachel's shrug was surprisingly sincere. "It
was a bit at first, especially right after Alec first started
manifesting. Ok, maybe I was crazy jealous then, and again a couple
of years later when it became apparent I wasn't going to manifest
anything, but I got over it."

My raised eyebrow was completely involuntary,
and apparently more eloquent than I'd realized. At least it earned
me another laugh. "It wasn't like it was easy or anything, but
Donovan gave me some good advice when things were the worst. I
don't remember his exact words, but essentially it came down to the
fact that there'll always be people who're better than me at
something. Even gaining super powers wouldn't change that. What's
important is that I do the best I can with what I've been given. As
crazy as it sounds, Alec's pack needs me."

I mentally reached around for something
similar and then finally nodded. "I guess I can understand that. My
mom would have a hard time functioning without me, so I try to do
the best I can at taking care of her."

Rachel's smile seemed to light the room up.
"That's it exactly. Anyways, I mostly just wanted to stop by and
see if us girls can take you shopping tomorrow."

The non sequitur really threw me for a loop.
"I left my money at home. I'm not much of a shopper anyways."

That last part sounded pretty weak even to
me.

"Don't be silly. Alec hustled you out of your
house so quickly you didn't get to bring anything but the clothes
on your back. Jasmin's clothes will fit you pretty well, but that's
only a short term-solution. We need to get you stuff to wear, and
since it was Alec who created this mess, it's only fair he be the
one to pay."

I was absolutely sure there was no way I was
ever going to fit into anything Jasmin owned, but girls being
girls, there was no point in protesting. Regardless of the truth,
Rachel would be obliged to say I was just as skinny as Jasmin.

"I don't think Alec exactly got me into all
of this. It was more like my own stupidity that landed me in this
particular batch of trouble."

"Please, as if any girl who didn't know what
a jerk Brandon was, would've done anything different. He's
gorgeous. It isn't until you realize just how hollow he is, that
anyone has a chance of resisting him."

There wasn't really any response to that.
"So, what's going to happen now? I mean with Brandon's pack?
Everyone seemed really worried last night."

"I'm not sure. Not really. It won't be
straightforward; nothing involving Brandon ever is. His pack is
bigger, but we've always had the laws on our side before
this..."

Rachel broke off as she saw my eyes get
bigger. "Sorry, that's touching on some of the things I'm not
supposed to tell you."

I shrugged, pretending indifference. "How
soon will we know if it's really bad or just a little bad?"

"I don't know. Things were already pretty
tense. That's probably where Alec is right now actually. Brandon's
people are always skirting around the edge of our territory, but
tonight they'll be out in greater numbers than normal. If things
don't boil over now, it's pretty much guaranteed that there will be
some kind of confrontation Monday at school."

The word confrontation seemed to reach out
and grab me. It took a second before I realized it was dragging up
memories of the near fight between Alec and half his pack. "What
happened last night...it was for real wasn't it?"

Rachel didn't ask what I meant; she didn't
even bat an eye. "I'm afraid so. Don't hate the others too much.
Sometimes when you're that scared it's hard to keep things in
perspective. Now that they've calmed down a little nobody would
really trade you to Brandon on the tiny chance it might smooth
things over. Not when we'll eventually end up in exactly the same
spot."

"It felt kind of like a game of capture the
flag, with me as the flag." It wasn't the most flattering
comparison ever invented, but at least it allowed me to try and
convince myself I'd imagined the near violence.

Rachel's laugh was short and bitter. "That
would be quite the understatement. I've known all five of them for
quite a while. Most of them my whole life. Even so, I don't really
know what it's like to be a shape shifter. Most of the time it just
means they're faster and stronger than me. That they can heal from
things that would kill me almost instantly. Sometimes though, the
other side of their nature shows through."

I felt my heart speed up as Rachel met my
eyes with more gravity even than normal. "They aren't always
completely in control, Adri. They try, and some of them are really
good. Alec is probably the most controlled person I've ever met,
and Isaac is so disciplined he's almost immune to the power plays.
Even so, sometimes it's like they operate on a shorter fuse than
the rest of us."

My throat was so dry it took me two attempts
to clear it. "Could Alec have won?" The question stuck in my
throat, reluctant to come out. It felt disloyal to Alec but I had
to know.

"I don't know. Individually Alec could take
any of them. There's a reason he's dominate to all of the rest of
them. James is a hybrid too. He isn't even second in the pack
because Isaac is a better fighter than him, but he makes for a
strong third. Jasmin is essentially fourth, although sometimes she
gets away with bossing James and even Isaac around. Apparently
she's a lot tougher than a normal wolf should be, and she's just
crazy enough to fight to the death over something that the other
two don't think is really all that important. Jessica is pretty
much the most submissive, not by temperament, but because she's the
weakest fighter we've got."

I felt my eyes go wide at all the new terms,
but kept my mouth shut because I was worried Rachel would clam up
if I started asking questions.

"I'm pretty sure Alec could take two of them,
but not all three. They knew that, which was part of the reason
they were pushing so hard."

I felt shivers crawl up my spine, but what
could someone say after something like that? Rachel reached over
and gave me a hug. "Try not to think about it too much. Just
remember that Alec's dominate to everyone here, and he'd die for
either of us without even a heartbeat's worth of hesitation."

After Rachel left I spent the next hour
trying to get comfortable in Alec's desk chair. It was likely the
discomfort was more due to the subject matter than the chair, but I
just couldn't get comfortable. I finally moved my books over to the
bed and sprawled out on it. Spanish, Math, History, Biology,
English. The subjects all blurred together as the hours passed by
in a blur of academic exhaustion.

I wanted to go to sleep long before dark, but
couldn't justify it, so I just kept grinding along. I'd long ago
learned that changing subjects and studying something new was
almost as good as a break, so I swapped out books on a regular
basis, and persevered despite increasingly-frequent head bobs.

The attack came as a complete surprise. One
moment I was quietly studying, an instant later hordes of shape
shifters were pouring into the mansion. Most of them looked just
like Simon and Nathanial, pony sized wolves moving with blinding
speed as they tore through doors and raced down halls.

Brandon came in immediately behind the first
batch of wolves. There was no way I could've known that the gray
monster who casually sliced through walls and two by fours with his
wickedly curved claws was Brandon, but I was somehow certain. He
was built just like Alec had been Friday night, only so much bigger
that he had to crouch forward to avoid hitting his head on the
unusually high ceilings.

Donovan faced off against one of the first
wolves, but it was obvious he was no match for the grace and power
of his opponent. The gentle, aging butler was knocked to the ground
between one heartbeat and the next. I was mercifully spared from
seeing the wreckage left when Brandon's wolves moved on, but there
was no doubt in my mind that Donovan was dead.

Screams, distant enough that they had to be
coming from the other wing of the house, reached out and pierced my
heart. There wasn't any way to be sure whether or not it was Rachel
or her mother, but ultimately it didn't really matter. Brandon was
going to kill all of us.

Another door caved in under a blow from
Brandon's fist, and I suddenly realized that he was now standing in
the Lilac Room. "Spread out and find her."

The words were nearly unintelligible, coming
as they did from a throat that shared little in common with Homo
sapiens, but the venom behind them was unmistakable.

I fled the bed where I'd been studying, and
hid in Alec's studio, but I could hear them getting closer, the
dissident melody of growls, howls, and destruction growing stronger
as they rampaged through the house.

Terror seemed to stretch time out, but even
so it felt as though only seconds had passed before I felt Brandon
enter Alec's suite. I crouched frozen on the floor as my death
crept ever closer. As Brandon crashed through the studio's far wall
in an explosion of plaster and lumber, I tried to shield my eyes,
only to find that I couldn't move.

The incongruity of being restrained when I
couldn't see anything constraining my movements was enough to
finally snap me back to wakefulness, but it was still several
seconds before I stopped thrashing and realized it'd just been an
extraordinary terrifying nightmare.

As soon as I stopped moving, the iron band
around my arms relaxed and slipped away. "Are you ok? I'm sorry
about that, I was afraid you were going to hurt yourself."

Alec's even tones caressed me like a calming
breeze. I finally oriented myself enough to realize that the warm,
solid surface my back was resting against wasn't a wall.

"I'm sorry. It was a nightmare." My voice
came out raw and scratchy, like I'd been talking for hours, or
possibly just screaming for the last minute or so. I wanted to tell
him about what had happened, but now that I was awake my fears felt
foolish. I tried to distract myself by looking around, and then
felt my face heat up as I realized I'd fallen asleep in Alec's
room.

"I'm so sorry Alec. Donovan and Rachel told
me you had copies of our textbooks in here. I was studying and must
have fallen asleep. Please don't think..." I felt tears start to
gather at the corner of my eyes, but there wasn't any way to tell
whether they were attributable to simple terror, acute
embarrassment, or a combination of the two.

Alec's arm was back, and he gently hugged me
against his chest. "It was all just a dream, and you don't have
anything to be sorry about. I don't mind you being here. I'm sorry
I had to leave you alone for so long, it was inexcusable."

I wanted to say something, wanted to tell
Alec he didn't need to worry about me, that I'd spent enough time
by myself lately to be happy with my own company, but the words
wouldn't come out. The sheer pleasure at having him hold me so
close was like a drug. I could feel the pleasant, tingly sensation
I'd started associating with his touch, and it was like the best
full body massage, tied up with chocolate and reading a
classic.

Unaware of my mild state of euphoria, Alec
continued on. "Actually, I owe you another apology. When I returned
and found you here I meant to carry you to your room. I was only
going to sit down for a second, but apparently I was more exhausted
than I realized. I hope you don't think my actions are
inappropriate."

I managed to slowly shake my head no, despite
my lassitude. Alec waited several seconds, and then sighed. "Well I
suppose I'd better get you off to bed."

The words initially didn't mean anything to
me. I heard them, but my mind refused to assign meanings to the
sounds. It wasn't until he'd moved his arm and rolled out of bed
with his characteristic speed and grace that I finally realized he
meant to take me to the Lilac Room and then return here to
sleep.

I suddenly had a hard time breathing. The
idea of lying alone in the dark, in the very room I'd just seen
Brandon demolish, sent my heart into an erratic rhythm. If there'd
been an EMT present they'd already be charging up the
defibrillator.

Alec turned around while I was still trying
to get my throat to work again. "You stopped breathing. What's
wrong?"

The tears his touch had dried up a few
seconds before were back, and just seconds away from escaping the
corners of my eyes by the time I finally pulled myself up onto my
knees and managed to speak.

"Please don't send me there. Not after my
dream."

There was just enough moonlight trickling
into the room for me to see his expression change. My stomach
seemed to reach up and wrap itself around my heart as I realized it
was the expression he used when it was important to him that people
not know what he was thinking.

"I'm not sure that's the best idea."

The tears finally made their escape as I
crumpled back onto the bed. "You're right. I'm so sorry to be such
a bother." The words were broken by gasping sobs, but they were
understandable, if only just barely.

Alec's hand on my shoulder just made me try
to roll away. I didn't want his pity. Not after everything else
he'd already done for me. Guilting him into helping me more just
felt wrong.

He captured me in his iron
grip, stopping me from getting up and running away. "Adriana Page,
it isn't that I don't want to be with you. Point of fact that's
what I want more than anything else right
now. 
That's 
why I'm not sure it's such a good idea."

His face had somehow gotten so close to mine
that I could see his eyes, and they were dead serious. I'd never
noticed how clear his eyes were. They were the purest blue I'd ever
seen, and looking into them was like trying to plumb the depths of
a bottomless spring. I could see further into him than I ever could
with Brandon, and there wasn't any deception there.