Broken Ever After (6 page)

From Jamie: WOW! just
… WOW!

I quickly threw on some jeans and a t
-shirt and ran down stairs. Just as I got to the bottom, Lily knocked on the door.

“
Hey!” I plastered a grin on my face and hoped she didn’t notice how on edge I was. She gave me one of her big smiles back, while rattling a bag in my face.

“
I brought a film and popcorn!” She beamed at me.

“
Cool, you set the film up and I’ll go make the popcorn” I smiled at her as I took the bag. I was thankful that she’d brought a film over as I wasn’t sure I could concentrate enough on conversation or revision. I made the popcorn, quickly ordered a pizza for us to share and grabbed a few more snacks and drinks before heading back to the living room.

“
So what film did you pick?” I opened my can and took a sip of the cool coke, wondering if it would cool me down enough to relax if I drank it all down.

“
Fatal Attraction
” She announced with a wry smile as I choked on my drink.

“
Why?” I spluttered between coughs. She gave me her ‘are you serious?’ look. “What?”

“
Come on! Don’t hold out on me Olivia!”

“
With what?” My stomach flipped, there was no way she could possibly know about anything that had happened earlier on.
Was there?

“
I heard a little rumour that a certain hottie teacher gave a certain someone a ride home yesterday.” She raised an eyebrow at me and I blushed.

“
And?” She sat up and folded her arms over her chest, pushing her tongue into her cheek just begging for me to come up with a viable excuse. “I was sick and I was asleep ‘til like half three so he was just being nice.” I smiled at her hoping she’d leave it at that. “Now are you going to press play or are we going to watch ‘DVD’ bobbing around the screen all night?” Lily sighed and pressed play.

“
So what happened? What did he say to you?”

“
Are you not going to drop this at all? There is nothing to say! I was asleep remember?” She was like a dog with a bone when she got her teeth into something.

“
If there was nothing to say you would have called me last night to tell me about him dropping you home or told me in school this morning at least!” I sighed heavily, she was right.

“
I was sick last night; I came home and went straight to bed. I still never felt too good this morning so it slipped my mind.” I tried my best to sound as convincing as I could.

“
Something like Mr Matthews dropping you home does
NOT. SLIP. YOUR. MIND
Olivia Grace Stevens”

“
It was nothing, I was ill and he let me sit in his class as registration was locked, I put my head down for a minute and fell asleep. He sorted out Mr Wilson so I didn’t have to go to art and then offered to take me home when I woke up because I live on his way home. See. Nothing.” I defiantly refused to look her in the eye and folded my arms across my chest defensively.

“
Hmm… You’re hiding something missy and I WILL find out what it is. I may just ask him tomorrow.” She gave me her smug face, she crossed her ankles up on the coffee table and folded her arms back over her chest; determination washed over her face as I watched a plan unfolded behind her eyes.

“
NO!” I leaped up and turned around to face her.
Shit.
I should have just let her be.

“
Ah ha! I knew there was something! Spill it Stevens!” Lily bounced up from her position and seated herself on the very edge of the sofa, excitement brimming from her every pore. I groaned. Why didn’t I have a poker face?

“
OK
…
ok
” I heaved a big sigh, nervously chewing on the corner of my bottom lip, wondering if I should say it. “He said I was cute” I mumbled as I paced the floor.

“
He said
WHAT
?” Lily nearly jumped off the sofa while I grabbed a pillow to hide behind as I flopped back down beside her. “What did you say to him?”

“
I couldn’t say anything! It was when he dropped me off and I’d gotten out of his car. He just handed me my detention slip and said ‘you’re very cute when you sleep’ and drove off! I was left stood there like an idiot wondering what the hell just happened! I literally stood watching his car drive down the street with my mouth hanging open. It was completely embarrassing.”

“
Oh my God! What happened in detention then?” I cringed back into the sofa a little at her question. There was no way I could tell her I just had the best
almost
encounter of my life! Best friend or not, no matter if she swore not to tell, I just couldn’t take the chance for the next three weeks. Those weeks were going to be hell.

“
Nothing. He acted like nothing happened at all. He let me finish my art plan as I was too ill to do it yesterday and then threw a maths book at me as I forgot mine so I could revise and that was that. Look, I’m not going to go all Alex Forrest 2.0. For one Ja- Mr Matthews isn’t married and two, I’m not clever enough to know how to blackmail or stalk anyone… can we turn this off now?”

“
So you never mentioned it to him?” She looked at me disbelievingly as she reached for the remote.

“
No, I just assumed he was messing with me and didn’t want to embarrass myself with it all. Who did you hear from anyway?” I shrunk down in my seat, trying to look disappointed.

“
Well Luke was hanging about outside school and he said he saw you getting in his car, he said you both looked really close.
Too close
.”

“
How close? He opened my door for me and we were never any closer than him sitting in the driver’s seat.”

“
I don’t know. I heard from Megan.”

“
Of course you did.” Stupid bitch couldn’t keep her mouth closed about anything. “And what? What does it matter? I was sick and he dropped me home. That’s it.” Lucas Fletcher was my ex-boyfriend, called so because he expected a little more from our relationship than I was willing to give. Why did he care what I did? He certainly didn’t care for me when we’d just broken up so he could have his fill of the selection of high-school sluts that clung to his every word. How could Luke be so stupid? So what if a teacher gave a student a lift home? I was ill and he was being nice.

“
Well Megan said that you won’t sleep with Luke because something is happening with Mr Matthews because they know you like him, which is just crazy, right?” I tried my best to look horrified at such a thought, although that was the one thing I wanted most in the world right now.

“
If there was do you think I’d be able to keep that a secret from you? That boy is such an idiot! Does he not know how much trouble that would cause?” I grabbed my phone and sent a message to Jamie.

To Jamie: Hey
, Lily just told me that Lucas Fletcher saw you giving me a ride home yesterday and is slowly spreading a rumour that there is more between us than there has been! I think I know why but I’m not sure how to stop him before another teacher or the head hears about it. -O x

“
Who are you messaging? Luke?” She asked trying to peer over at my phone.

“
Yeah” I lied furrowing my eyebrows as I glared at my phone, pulling up Luke’s number to message him.

“You know he wants you back don’t you? He’s hoping you’ve changed your mind since you helped him out with his art plan.”

To Lucas: Why are you spreading rumours about me? Do you even realise what you are doing? I thought we agreed to be friends? You aren’t exactly being ‘friendly’. Do you really think I would want you back when you act like a douchebag all the time and can’t stop screwing with the year 11’s? And now THIS?! -Liv.

“
I gave him tips on his composition and colours; it’s not like that means we are married now. God that boy is such an idiot!”

From Jamie: Lucas? Why? I just gave you a ride home because you were sick. He knows nothing more than that. I
’ll go to the head first thing and explain before he can do any damage. Don’t worry baby, it’ll be ok, I promise. -J X

To Jamie: Will explain later.
Lily is here. X

Lily and I sat bitching about Luke through another DVD
, but he never got back to me. I don’t know what I expected of him; I was starting to get a headache with worrying about what he was saying to all of my friends. Would they believe him? I wasn’t sure how many people knew about my crush on Mr Matthews, but I bet it was more than just my immediate friends.

Realisation hit me in the face like a slap.
“Lily? You can’t tell anyone what Mr Matthews said to me. If Luke hears about it, it’ll just make everything worse when there is really nothing there!”

“
Don’t worry, Liv. I’m not stupid, I’d never say anything to anyone; I swear it.” She crossed her fingers over her heart with her promise and I hugged her tightly until she couldn’t breathe.

She had to go after the film as she had to do some studying for a mock test we had in the morning. She left so fast she forgot her DVD so I needed to remember that in the morning
, I left it by the door so I wouldn’t forget it. I felt so alone and confused about everything, I didn’t even know what Jamie and I had and it was about to be ruined by a stupid boy before I even had a chance to find out! My head hurt; I headed up to bed early and sent Jamie a good night message as I tucked myself in.

A few minutes after I’d closed my eyes I heard my door bell ring. I should have known better than go to bed; even though I’d never lost anything of Lily’s yet she still never trusted anyone with anything.

“
Lily, you know I would have brought your DVD to you in the morning” I called through the door while I unlocked it. I pulled the door open and was grabbed into a tight embrace by Jamie before he pressed a finger under my chin lifting my lips up for a kiss. He let me go so I could breathe again. “Jamie, what are you
doing
here?” I looked around frantically for anyone watching a strange man knocking on my door.

“
I couldn’t let you go to sleep without a good night kiss could I? And don’t worry; I checked for your parents cars before I knocked.” I blushed as his thumb stroked over my cheek. “I promise I’ll make everything right in the morning, try not to worry. I’ll tell Mr Wright that I gave you a lift home as you were ill and that’s it; that really is all that happened. That day.” He grinned and placed a small kiss to my lips. “He might ask you into his office to clarify but I’ll tell him that’s all I know and heard of until you came to me and told me about Luke after school today. Do you know why he’s doing it?” I looked down at the floor; he put his finger under my chin again for me to look up at him.

“
Erm… Come in a minute.” I grabbed his hand and pulled him in the hall; I quickly locked the door again and pulled him up the stairs to my room. I locked my door just in case my parents came back and leaned up against it looking at him as he sat down on the end of my bed, not knowing what to say.

He gazed around my room
, his eyes taking in all of the photographs and paintings that lined my walls and shelves; some landscapes from walks with my Uncle Austin and the rest, portraits of my family and friends. “Did you do all of these?”

“
Yup.” I said with the ‘p’ popping on my lips; my back still pinned to my bedroom door. He stood up to get a closer look at one of my paintings that was hanging opposite my bed. It was a picture of a hallway; the focus, although slightly blurred was a figure of a man dressed in dark blue with his back to the viewer, his left hand tucked into his pocket, his right hand free by his side as he walked. The walls of the hallway were cream coloured, the floor black, blurred figures surrounded the man, pressed to the walls like a parting tide as he walked between them. It was a view I had seen daily for the last six years; a view of Jamie. My heart was in my throat as he continued to stare at it, his gaze moving to the date in the corner. I’d painted it two years ago.

He turned to face me w
ith a glazed look in his eyes; his mouth opened as if to say something. He closed it again as his eyes came back into focus, landing on me. “That’s what you sleep in?” I looked down at my little black, silk camisole and tiny matching shorts, biting the inside of my cheek as a blush swiftly swept over the outside.

“
Erm… Yes, why? Is there something wrong with my pyjamas?” I frowned at him, flushing more as his gaze raked over my body.

“
No” he breathed a ragged sigh and sat back down. “I just wish there was more to them right now as I’m having a hard time staying over here and keeping my hands to myself.” he knitted his fingers together in a tight grip, making the tips of his fingers turn white and chuckled.
Don’t. Don’t stay over there. Don’t keep your hands to yourself.

“
You’ve seen less” I reminded him, smiling shyly with my cheeks now burning furiously.

“
That was different, this is in person.” he looked me up and down again, the look in his eyes was like that of a man dying of thirst in the desert and I was a cool, pool of water. An ache developed between my legs, heat pooling for him, I wanted him so badly… but we couldn’t; at least not until I finished school.
Why was I insisting on this again?
“So why is that little shit saying things about us?” He said pulling me from my tortured thoughts. I went and sat down at the pillow end of my bed, away from him so I could resist touching him.

“
He’s my ex-boyfriend.” I admitted quietly.

“
Ok? That doesn’t mean he can go around spreading rumours.”

“
Because he knows that… I like you.” Was it possible to spontaneously combust from the heat radiating from your cheeks? I fiddled nervously with the duvet cover beneath my folded legs. “I wouldn’t have sex with him and he thought that was why… because we are…” I gestured between the two of us not being able to say it out loud. He nodded his understanding. “He hasn’t contacted me, but I think he will try to blackmail me into it with this.” I looked down as tears began to form in my eyes. Jamie and I would get in so much trouble if all of this came out and I couldn’t stand for it to happen.

“
You think he’ll blackmail you? Into… sleeping with him?” He moved closer to me as a strangled sob escaped from my throat. I crashed my hands against my face to hide the tears that were about to start pouring down my face and Jamie wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. “Shhh… Don’t worry, Angel it will all be ok. Shhh” he started running his hands up and down my back trying to soothe me, but I was so exhausted from my severe lack of sleep that I couldn’t stop.

His hands went to my hair and held my head to pull me back.
“I will
not
let him break us apart before we even have a chance to start anything, do you hear me?” I nodded weakly, looking up at him through blurry eyes as his thumbs brushed away the tears on my cheeks. “I really like you Olivia and I can’t wait for the next few weeks to be out of the way because I want to be with you.”

I never said anything; I didn
’t have any words that would convey exactly how much I wanted him. I lifted my hands up to his hair pulling him towards me to kiss him. I didn’t hold back with my kiss; I felt hungry for more of him, I knelt up beside him so I could kiss him deeper. Jamie let go of my head slowly running his hands down my back, massaging as he went.

Fi
nally his hands got to my rear, lifting me over to his lap so I could straddle him. I could feel how exited he was already through his jeans and pressed against him making him moan into my mouth, I kept moving against him wishing that his jeans were off. He started trailing kisses down to my neck, staying at the spot I loved just under my ear making me moan with him. I started to feel nervous about the signals I was giving him with my body and shifted back away from him a little, resisting the urge to press against him again. I felt my stomach flip with nerves.

“
Jamie” I whispered.

“
Mmm… I love it when you say my name like that.” He mumbled into my neck, his hands pulling me roughly against his crotch.

“
No, Jamie…”

“
What?”

“
We can’t” I said as I pulled him closer, loving the feeling of his lips on my skin again.

“
I think you want to” he said so low and sounding so sexy.

“
I do… But my parents will be home soon… And we have to wait… ‘til I finish school”

“
But they aren’t here yet. No one will know, I want you so badly, Olivia” he whispered in my ear as he pulled my hips closer to his again, making his erection rub against me in the most delicious way causing me to shiver. “Your body is screaming yes… why is your mouth saying no?”

“
Jamie I want you too, I really do, but I can’t have sex with you. Not here, Not now. Please.”

“
Ok, but please let me stay and just kiss you.”

“
Ok. Just kissing, I can do that. You promise me?”

“
Mm hmm” he mumbled against my neck.

“
Jamie?”

“
Huh?

“
Promise?”

“
Ok, ok” He said distractedly and resumed planting kisses along my neck and down the curve of my shoulder.

I pulled him back up to face me so I could look into his eyes. He crashed his lips in to mine
, before picking me up off the bed, turning around and laying me down with him on top of me. I couldn’t help but wrap my legs around his waist pulling him closer to me, loving the way his trousers rubbed against me again.

His right hand made its way around to my waist
, then to my stomach, rubbing circles with his thumb, moving slowly upwards. He stopped moving up just as his thumb started to brush against my breast and pulled away from our kiss, looking at me to ask for permission to carry on. I pushed the sick feeling rising in my throat… This is not the same!
This is not the same!

I nodded and he slowly began to kiss me again as his hand moved up higher. His thumb still tracing small circles over my skin finally found my nipple
, he began kissing down my neck, making his way to the soft swell of my breasts. He kissed down over my camisole to the hem, gripping it in his teeth to pull it up, freeing my breasts from inside.

He lifted his left hand to my right nipple and began tracing circles with his thumb again; then with his right hand he started moving downwards
, replacing his thumb with his lips over my nipple. He kissed around the hardened bud before taking it in his mouth, sucking and licking making me moan and my back arch up from the bed pushing up in to him. I felt all of my insides tighten like everything was linked together.
What the hell is happening?
My whole body was filled with an alien feeling. If not having sex can feel so good… What would having sex actually feel like?

“
Jamie…” I wanted him to stop. I wanted him to carry on. I wanted the strange feeling to go away and last forever all at the same time.

“
Shhh” I moaned again feeling his breath blow over my wet nipple. He began trailing kisses again this time to my other nipple where he continued sucking and licking. His hand which was still moving south was now at the top of my shorts, his finger playing with my waistband.

“
Jamie, you said we could wait!” I panted, my breath coming out short and fast in my anticipation of what was building inside me.

“
We
can
, we
are
”

“
This doesn’t feel like waiting”

“
You want me to stop?” He asked seductively and started kissing up to my neck again.

“
No… Yes… Ahh no…” He chuckled at me.

“
Do you want me to stop, Olivia?” I shook my head no. “But you don’t want me to make love to you?”
Making love!
Those two words, the way he said them… I bit my lip as I thought. I felt so torn.

“
I don’t want you to stop what you are doing, but I want to wait. We need to wait. Is that ok?” I had to stick to that, I didn’t want my first time here, in fear that my parents would be home any second.

“
Of course it is.” He pecked a kiss on my lips. “I don’t want to do anything you aren’t ready to do. If I do something you don’t want me to, just tell me, ok? I just want to be here with you; I promise we can wait to make love.” Those words again. I nodded nervously and he began kissing me again. He hooked a finger in the top of my shorts at my hip and began to slowly pull them down to sit diagonally on me; he moved his finger along the waistband to my other hip and pulled down taking my shorts down my legs. He gripped behind my knee and pulled it upwards, then laid it sideways so my legs were wide completely exposing me to him. The cool air tickling my heated, wet core.

He started tracing circles again up my leg. I felt sick
, my breath hitched in my throat and I had to swallow hard.
It’s not the same… I’m ok. This is Jamie… Mr Matthews! You want this!
I had to keep reminding myself.

I ran my hands down from his hair to his shoulders and down his back
; I found the hem of his t-shirt and began to pull it up over his head. I ran my hands down his chest and stomach, around his waist to his back again, I felt him shiver as I ran my nails gently up and down the length of his back. His hand had finally reached the top of my thigh. I felt like I was on fire with need to feel him inside me. I’d never
allowed
anyone touch me there and I’d never wanted it to happen so much before. I was always shying away from any physical contact that went further than kissing; now I was craving it, aching for it.

“
Jamie… Please…” I pleaded; I needed to feel his hand on me. His thumb brushed up and down the entrance of my sex, before finding my clit rubbing circles over it. My back arched off the bed and I cried out his name again; he slowly slipped a finger inside me making me moan as he withdrew it to push in again and again, it was too slow.

“
You are so wet” Jamie whispered in my ear.

“
Jamie… Faster.” He did as I asked and I started to moan louder as I could feel my insides begin to tighten around his finger. He suddenly stopped as he looked to the door. “Jamie?”

“
Shh…” He kept his finger inside me, looking down at me a little worried.