Broken Ever After (38 page)

“
You could have stopped him but you didn’t.” I screamed. “He was going to rape me and you did nothing!” My voice fell to a whisper, as I began crying again. “You did nothing. You did nothing.”

“
Shut up! SHUT UP!
SHUT UP!
” The bed shook as Julie dived on top of it, scrambling over to me.

The last thing I remember was
her on top of me, her hands making their way to my throat.

I woke up to a familiar beeping in my ears. Hospital? How the hell did I get here? Something was annoying my face and I tried to push it away.

“Oh no you don’t, lady.”

“
Dad?” Fuck, it hurt to breathe.

“
Hey” Dad kissed my cheek. “You scared me, Princess. I’m so glad you are back again.”

“
Frank” Was all I could say. I wanted to tell him what happened.

“
I know, sweetheart, I know” He leaned over me to gently hold me. “I know. You’re ok now.”

“Julie!”

“Shh…”

“
Riley. The girl?”

“
They’ll all be dealt with, honey. I’ll make sure of it.” Dad said sternly. “Look, you’ll be taken upstairs in a minute so I’m just going to go tell your mum and Jamie that you are ok.”

“
Jamie here?” I didn’t want to see him. How could I tell him to go? I was so confused with everything and I couldn’t live with feeling conflicted. I had no idea what was the truth. Where were the lies? Was
anything
ever real? The more I thought of everything, the more it hurt my already throbbing head.

“
Jamie was the one that found you, sweetheart.” I looked up at my dad shocked.

I woke up again
in my room surrounded by my Mum, Dad, Austin and Jamie. I kept my eyes firmly on my Uncle Austin. The corner of his lip pulled up in a small smile of relief. A single tear rolled away from my eye as I wanted so badly to go to him, to have him wrap me up and tell me everything was ok, just like he always had when I was upset.

Uncle Austin looked between my Mum
, Dad and Jamie, then nodded to me, understanding my silent plea.

“
Guys can you give us a minute?” Everyone looked nervously between each other but never said anything as they stood to leave the room. Mum came over to me placing a small kiss on my cheek and wiped a small tear away from under her eye. I knew I was hurting her by wanting to talk to Austin instead; it always hurt her that I was more connected to him. She thought I hated her because it was her brother that abused me but it wasn’t true. I was just genuinely closer to Austin.

Uncle Austin was in his early twenties when I’d tried to kill myself. He was looking after me, not that I
’d needed much taking care of as I hardly ever left my bedroom. I’d sneaked out of my room in the middle of the night to make a sandwich. I’d heard the phrase about people taking the easy way out by slitting their wrists and dying as a way of getting out of something horrible.

Eyeing the knife I got the idea of making everything go away. I wouldn’t have to live with all of the hate I had for myself any more. I sneaked ba
ck up the stairs with the knife hiding in the bathroom with it, running my fingers over the sharp edge.

As soon as I
’d cut the skin on my wrist I felt the blood pour down over my hand; I closed my eyes as relief washed over me, feeling like I was finally at the end of all the pain in my life, that no one would be able to hurt me ever again. I opened my eyes back up and looked at the wound and then I felt the pain with it too. It was a lie. It wasn’t easy. Dying hurt just as much as living.

I knew in that
moment that I shouldn’t have done it but I couldn’t change the fact that I had. I screamed for Uncle Austin to come and help me.

I remember his frantic cries as he dialled for an ambulance. He told me over and over how stupid I was and that I should have just talked to him. When I was recovering in hospi
tal that was exactly what I did; I poured my heart out to him with everything that Uncle Robert had done to me, how I felt about it all, how I felt about him dying and everything that would be mine when I grew up.

He sat beside my hospital bed and pulled a small box wrapped in silver paper and handed it to me. He told me that it was my birthday present but having it a couple of weeks early would be ok if I promised to be good and keep talking to him. I opened the box to find a beautiful silver bracelet; the links in the chain were engraved with O
’s and A’s for Olivia and Austin.

“
I want you to promise me that whenever you feel sad, upset or alone that you’ll touch this bracelet and remember that you always have me. You’ll always have me to talk to Olivia, I promise. Please promise you’ll always talk to me.”

“
I promise.”

“
Good girl” He climbed up onto my bed and laid beside me pulling me into his arms. “Even if you aren’t sad you can still talk to me. Even if you are really happy about something I want to know that too, ok? Not just bad things, I want to know everything ok? Promise you’ll always tell me what you are feeling.”

“
I promise Tintin.” He let out a big hearty laugh. I hadn’t called him that in a while.

“
That’s my Lollie-pop.”

***

Austin closed the door behind the three of them and came over to sit beside me on my bed. “You want to talk?” I started to cry. Why did everything have to be so tough? I wrapped my arm around my chest trying to hold in the pain that shot through me with every single breath. I don’t know how long I cried for but I was wrapped up in Uncle Austin’s arms when I finally stopped. I had questions that needed answers and I needed them immediately to organise my thoughts.

“
Did you- send Riley- to take me?” I gasped out.

“
No honey, no. You needed to be in hospital.” First lie. What else had he lied about?

“
The notes - from Jamie?”

“
No. We now know that they were from Frank and Julie. The police have them both now and are looking for Riley.” Second.

“
The girl. Is she ok?”

“
What girl?” Austin looked at me with confusion over his face.

“
Riley’s girlfriend”

“
I don’t know. I didn’t know he had one. Was she there?”

“
Frank had her. That’s why- he took me. Jamie. Was he- with four- other women?”

“
What? I don’t think so. He seems pretty taken with just you so if he was I’d string him up by his balls.”

“
I don’t- know what- to do.” I gasped out between quiet sobs. Uncle Austin let out a long sigh and kissed the top of my head as he thought for a moment.

“
I’m not going to tell you what to do, Liv, but I think you are too young for all of this. You don’t need this shit surrounding a new relationship. It’s supposed to be fun and carefree when you’re eighteen.”

“
I should be on my own?”

“
I think maybe for a while that would be better. At least until you and Jamie are in a better place, maybe get back to where you were before all of this drama unfolded. Everything seems to have just snowballed for you both, even I’m feeling dizzy from it all and you have a cracked skull so I can only imagine the headache you have to deal with as well as all of this.” I nodded. He was right, my whole life tipped upside down in a matter of days.

“
Thank you.”

“
You’re welcome, honey.” He leaned down to place a kiss on the top of my head again.

“
Can I talk- to Jamie?”

“
Are you sure you want to do that now?”

“
Need to.” He pulled me in for a light squeeze before getting up off the bed and leaving the room to fetch Jamie. I watched him as he slowly entered the room sensing something bad was about to happen as he took in Austin’s expression and mine. It hurt to look at him knowing what I had to say. He made all of my dreams come true a month before and there I was, ruining everything.

“
You scared the hell out of me.” Jamie bent down to kiss me but I pulled away from him. “Angel, what’s up?” I pulled the stupid mask away from my face and regretted it immediately as the alarms for my oxygen level sounded beside my bed.

“
Jamie… please listen to me. I don’t want to argue- I need you to leave- and not come back.”

“
What? Why?”

I told him that I couldn
’t be with him and it hurt. In such a short time there has always been an obstacle to overcome; I didn’t want a relationship like that. He tried to blame it on Riley. Why the hell would I want Riley after he’d tricked me?

“
I don’t want to fight. Just… go… forget about me,
please
.” Don’t cry you idiot!
Don’t cry!

“
Forget about you? I could never do that! Why are you doing this, Liv? Please! Don’t do this, Olivia.”

“
Jamie, it’s no use. I’m no good- for you. I was stupid- thinking this could work.” Why would he want me? Look at him! He could have any number of women… Women… Not stupid little girls.

“
It does work when you’re not being crazy.”

“
Exactly, I’m crazy, jealous, and too immature. I’m… too young for you.” I wasn’t mature enough for the kind of relationship he wanted.

“
But I love you because you’re crazy and jealous; you’re also beautiful and talented, kind and honest… I love you!”

He wasn
’t listening to me. “I’m not old enough for you Jamie. I can’t give you what you want.”

“
You are! You do!” I sighed in frustration which felt like a thousand razor blades in my lungs.
Just listen to what I’m trying to say, God damn it!

“
I need time. Please?” I put the stupid mask back on my face, letting him know silently that I’d finished talking. I turned over as tears came to my eyes. I couldn’t look at Jamie anymore; he looked just as broken as I felt. Pain shot through my side again as I turned, I couldn’t watch Jamie leave.

He
leaned over me brushing a tear away from my cheek and kissed my forehead. Don’t give in!

“
I can give you time. I will make you trust me again. Being with you has been the best and worst four weeks of my life. I’m not giving up on my promise.” Don’t give in!
Don’t give in!

“
Goodbye, Mr Matthews.” I told him with a shaky voice.

“
Goodbye, Miss Stevens.”

He yanked the door open so hard I jumped. Mum and Dad rushed in and I heard another door down the corridor fly open with a bang.

“What’s up with Jamie?” Mum asked, concerned for him.

“
I need to sleep.”

I
’d rather be trapped in the nightmares that reminded me of my past, rather than face the reality of sending away the man of my dreams. I pulled the blanket up over my head to hide the tears rolling down my cheeks as I lay there, completely confused, without my Prince Charming and my heart, broken ever after.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Natalie Graham was born in England, where she resides in a noisy sea-side town with her husband and two children.

She can often be found curled up with a cup of tea and her phone wearing out her Kindle
/iBooks Apps, hugging her laptop furiously close to her while she writes, or cringing in a corner as she thinks about how to write about herself in third person.

She has always had a passion for writing, especially short stories which took a back seat while she had her children. She rediscovered her love for writing in 2011 after falling in love with reading.

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