Broken: Hidden Book Two (11 page)

“From what you tell me, you’ve been saying many stupid things to him lately,” she said, watching me.

I shrugged.

“Does he deserve it?” She asked after a while.

“He lied to me.”

“Yes. And he admitted it. Does he deserve for you to continue acting like this?”

“No,” I said. “Every time I start feeling something for him, I panic. And then I throw Nain’s memory in his face. I know it’s cruel, and I do it anyway.”

We sat in silence for a few minutes. “You know. You’ve told me all about all of this. I sat with you afterward, remember?” I nodded. “Consider something, from someone who knows something about eternity and vows and all of that. You loved your demon husband. I know you did. And you bound yourself to him and you meant it.
He
broke that bond, by choice, by not telling you what would happen when you destroyed his enemy. Not you. You do not have to spend the rest of your life in some kind of self-assigned purgatory.”

“I’m afraid,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

“Of what?”

“Doing this again. Letting someone in. Losing them.” I sighed. “He’s my best friend. He’s my right hand. I’m able to do everything I do because he has my back in every possible way.”

She raised her eyebrows. “And, so, you treat him like garbage, because….?” Eunomia said.

I didn’t answer. Shook my head. “Stupid Guardians and their stupid logic,” I muttered.

“All I’m saying is, maybe stop being so wrapped up in your own fears that you overlook the good things in your life. Look at what the man has been through for you.” She ticked the points off on her fingers as she talked. “He helped train you to fight. He’s had to cope with hating himself since the Puppeteer took control of him. He watched you love someone else. Stayed by your side for months when you mourned the man he lost you to. Became your partner, your confidante, even though it must have hurt him a lot of the time.”

She stopped for a second, then went on. “And, just to top it off, he pulled your burnt, broken body out of a fire, and he sat by your bedside day and night, watching, praying that you’d come back, and he’s been calm and strong through every insane situation you’ve put him through.” She paused. “You know what? Forget you. The shifter is enough to make me reconsider my maiden status.”

I smacked her lightly on the arm. “Not funny, E.”

“You see what I’m saying, don’t you? Please tell me you are not that clueless.”

I sighed. “I do. He’s too good for me.”

She rolled her eyes. “And, that’s where we end the discussion because we’ve veered into Stupidville. Clearly, you need a distraction. How about guarding the gate?”

I stared at her. “Are they through?”

“Not yet. It’s weak, though, and we haven’t been able to stop it. We’ve tried everything. We’re at that point. We need you to protect your end.”

“Why didn’t you just say that? We don’t have time to chit-chat.”

She tilted her head, studied me. “Because you needed to talk. You’re not a robot, demon girl. Admitting you have emotions is not a weakness.”

“I don’t have time for emotions. I don’t have time to think, let alone try to figure out any of this shit with Brennan,” I said.

“You need to make time. What are you fighting for, really, unless it’s to protect those you love?” She let me think that over for a bit. “All right. Should we go now?”

I nodded. “Where?”

“Let’s fly.”

I stared at her again. “Hell, no.”

“You’ve flown with me before.”

“I was mostly dead at the time,” I pointed out.

“Want me to knock you out?” she asked sweetly. She straightened her robes, flexed her wings, and grinned at me with her sharp little teeth.

“Try it, Big Bird,” I muttered, and she laughed.

She grabbed me under my arms, and we soared through the air, the city below us a blur. I closed my eyes and tried not to puke. When she finally set me down, I felt like kissing the ground.

She laughed. “Who would have guessed that the big bad Angel was such a baby?”

I gave her the finger. And then I looked around, froze. A thousand bad memories hit me. Screams, the smell of burning flesh. Anguish, emptiness. I could still hear my own screams reverberating off of concrete.

She watched me. “I’m sorry, my friend. This was another reason I put off showing you where the gateway was,” Eunomia said softly.

“What are the odds?” I whispered as I looked around the abandoned Packard plant. Crumbling walls, garbage.

Where Nain had died.

I felt myself nearing the edge. A few months ago, I would have gone over.

I was different now. I would not be destroyed by this. Not again. I let myself feel my grief. Let myself mourn again, for just a moment, remembering. Remembering everything. The good, the bad. The passion and the pain. Honoring him for what he’d given to me.

I also, insanely enough, felt myself letting go. Letting go of the anger, the hatred. The guilt. Letting go of him, even as I wept for him again.

I settled myself down, wiped my eyes, and I took a deep breath. Shook my head. “It’s fine. We have things to do.”

She watched me.

“Really.”

Then she smiled. “Good.” She fluttered to an end of the factory, almost exactly where we’d fought that night. “Come here. See if you can sense it.”

“Should I be able to?”

She shrugged. “I’m curious. Humor me.”

I walked that way, making a point of not looking at the spot where Nain had died. I could pinpoint it, seared into my mind. I reached Eunomia, looked around. Nothing but concrete and trash. Then I closed my eyes, felt an unpleasant sensation, like a pull, almost physical. I opened my eyes, pointed to my left. “It’s there.”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“I can feel it because of the demon thing, right?”

She shook her head. “I do not think so. Anyway, this is the gateway. If something comes through, kill it.”

I laughed. “Right. Because it will be that easy.”

She raised her eyebrow. “I think you can handle it.”

“If they get through, it’s because they fought their way past a bunch of demons and a Fury to get here. If they get through, I’m pretty sure we’re fucked.”

“Deal with it. It’s what you do.”

I felt it then. Something was bashing the barrier between the gateway and us. “Feel that?” I asked Eunomia.

She nodded. “Something is coming.”

Chapter Nine

The words were barely out of her mouth when the first of the demons barreled through the gateway, seeming to appear out of nowhere. Six of them, huge, hulking, eyes glowing. Skin the color of old bruises. I readied myself, dove into them, punching, cutting.

“You have to use your powers, devil girl,” Eunomia yelled, before winking out of sight, back to the Nether to find out what was happening.

I tried to ignore the sick feeling in my stomach as I unleashed fire on the two nearest me. One was grabbing my hair, and I sent mental knives behind me, at him, and I glanced back to see his eyes bleeding. He still held onto me, though, and another came at me, black, cruel-looking sword gleaming. He slashed, and I felt it rip across my stomach.

I gritted my teeth against the pain. I hated feeling my blood streaming out of my body. “Big mistake, asshole,” I growled. I launched forward at him, leapt onto him and coursed fire into his body as he screamed. Soon, he was still, and I turned to take on the one that was already bleeding as the first two lay in smoking lumps.

Two more. The first charged toward me, knocked me down, put his gigantic hands around my throat and started squeezing. I fought him, but it was like fighting steel, and I was already weakening a little from healing myself. He looked down at me, grinned a slimy, sharp-toothed grin, and reached for my pants.

“Sorry, buddy. There’s only one demon I’ve ever let into my pants, and it’s definitely not you,” I said. Then I smiled up at him, shot mental knives at his stomach, and he fell off of me, screaming. I rubbed my bruised throat, looking around for the other one while his teammate laid blubbering at my feet.

I saw him running for the exit. I ran after him, determined that he not leave the factory. If he got out, it would be easier for me to lose track of him. He looked over his shoulder, and I could feel his fear.

Damn, demonic fear was good. It strengthened me, and I put on a burst of speed, leapt onto his back as he tried to get away.

“Who sent you?” I asked him, standing up and throwing him back into the factory. He roared in pain as he struck the concrete wall. He sprung up and tried running at me, but I tossed a small fireball at him. It struck, and he panicked and started rolling around on the floor, extinguishing the flames. I waited patiently as he got himself together again.

“I’ll ask again. Who sent you?”

My imps were surrounding the two of us now, watching, waiting. The demon rose to his knees.

“Nobody.”

I conjured a fireball, bobbled it in my hand, and felt his fear spike. “Are you sure?”

“I swear. Nobody sent me.” His voice was a little high-pitched for a demon. He seemed young, compared to the ones I had come across.

“Then how did you and your buddies get here?” I still held the fire, and he stayed on his knees.

“There was a fight. A bunch of us were bashing at the gateway, trying to get through. The Fury and her guard demons got distracted when the mob attacked them, and a few of us were able to come through before they realized what was happening.”

“Is the gateway really that weak?”

He nodded. “If they are not working to keep it intact, it opens.”

“Why did you come here?”

He looked at me as if I was stupid, which really annoyed me. “Freedom.”

“What was your crime?” I asked, genuinely curious.

“I murdered my parents.”

“The Furies tend to look down on that,” I said. I remembered the things Nain had told me about his own parents, though, and had a feeling this demon's parents probably weren't worth mourning.

“Yeah.” He watched me. “You’re like them. You’re going to send me back.”

I studied him. “I don’t know how to send you back,” I finally admitted.

We sat in silence. “So I have a choice to make here. Do I kill you, the way I did your buddies, there?”

“They’re not my buddies. I didn’t even know them.”

I sensed for him. Nervousness, fear.

“Or do I let you go? The problem with that is that unleashing a murderous demon on my city is not something I feel comfortable doing.”

“I’m not murderous. I have killed.”

I almost smiled. Ridiculous that I could totally relate.

“No murdering. No raping. No causing pain to innocents. If I hear of you doing any of these things, and I will,” I added, gesturing at my imps, thirty or so of which had gathered around us now, “then I will hunt you down, and I will kill you slowly and painfully, and there will be nothing left for the Guardians to escort to the Nether.”

He gulped, and he watched me, and he looked at my imps. “Then I’ll be weak, and something else will just kill me anyway.”

“Use your strength for something good. There are more than enough evil bastards out there to keep you satisfied without ever preying on an innocent.”

He was watching me. “So you want me to play the hero?”

I smiled. “I do it, every day of my life. Why not?” I waited as he sorted through it all in his mind. “What is your name?”

“Levitt.” Not his demon name, that, he was keeping to himself. I understood. Names have power and all that.

“So, what do you say, Levitt?”

“You’re giving me a chance to redeem myself,” he said quietly. “Why?”

I extinguished my flame, looked around. I shook my head, remembering. “Because someone showed me, once upon a time, how much good a demon could do. I’m doing this in memory of him. If you make me regret it, there will be no place dark or far enough for you to hide from me.”

He looked around at my imps again, who took that moment to bend knee to me, as one, and thump their fists to their chests.

The demon, Levitt, watched them do it. And then he went to one knee, bowed his head to me, and thumped his chest, in the same way. “I swear I will honor you,” he said and when I sensed for him, there was almost the same sense of adoration and obedience I got from my imps.

“Go on. Do good,” I said. Levitt stood up, thumped his chest one more time, and made to leave.

“Oh, Levitt,” I said, smiling.

He turned. “Yes?”

“You might want to put on a human skin.”

He looked down at himself, looked at me. “Oh. Right.” He focused for a moment, and the air shimmered around him. The skin he wore perfectly matched the demon he’d been. Average height, solidly built. Brown hair, brown eyes, a light beard. A black t-shirt and cargo pants. “Good?” he asked.

I nodded. “Good.”

“Thank you,” he said, thumping his chest again.

I nodded, and he turned and walked out of the factory. I watched him go, and took a deep breath. Bash and Dahael came to my side, and Dahael took my hand.

“Mistress is so good,” she said, smiling up at me.

“Right thing to do. Good in him,” Bash agreed.

“Demon skin would have been proud,” Dahael said, giving my hand a squeeze. We stood there for a bit.