Broken Lives (11 page)

Alec and I still sleep in separate bedrooms;
he doesn’t want to do anything to hinder his divorce. After
everything Molly has done, this is nothing. I don’t think it will
matter whether we share a bed or not. Once the kids are in bed and
asleep, Alec and I lie in bed together and talk about his court
date tomorrow and what it will mean for us and for our
relationship. I see a spark in his eyes that is usually
missing.

“
The chance of her showing
up tomorrow for court is very slim. I don’t think you have anything
to worry about,” I say, trying to relax him.

“
There is always that small
chance she will.” 

“
And if she does, the judge
will award you the divorce that you deserve.” 

Alec looks at me and gives me a half smile.
“Have I told you how lucky I am to have you?” he says, cupping my
cheek. 

I smile and lean into his hand. “You always
tell me, and it never gets old.” 

He leans over, kisses me, and breaks away
only long enough to say, “Good, and I love you so much.”

I want to say,
I love you, too
, but, he
is already kissing me again. 

The next morning I wake up before Alec does.
Since we sleep in separate bedrooms, it’s easy to not wake him. I
was going to take the day off work to offer moral support, but he
thought it would be best if I went to work. I shower and dress in a
red above-the-knee-length dress. After I make the bed, I start the
coffee and begin making a big breakfast for everyone.

I hear the shower and I know Alec is up. He
often showers first thing in the morning. Before he sees me and
even before his first cup of coffee, he showers for the day. I hear
singing and I smile. Alec always sings in the shower. When the
bacon and pancakes are done, I wake the kids up before making the
eggs.

Alec comes up behind me and hugs me. “Good
morning, you’re up pretty early this morning.” 

I lean into him and say, “Good morning, I
wanted to make everyone a nice breakfast before I left for
work.” 

“
Is there a special
occasion?” he asks, while pouring himself a cup of coffee. He is
dressed in a grey suit, white shirt, and black tie. He looks more
like an attorney than a doctor.
Dressed to
impress
the judge,
I think to myself.

“
I don’t need a special
occasion to do something nice for my family.” I flip the eggs and
Alec hands me a plate.

“
Momma, can I wear this
shirt?” I turn around and James is standing there holding a red
Spiderman shirt. 

“
You didn’t like the shirt I
laid out for you?’ I ask, walking closer to him.

“
I like this
one.”

I take the shirt from him and slip it over
his head. He slides his arms through the armholes and smiles at me.
I tell him, “There you go, handsome as ever.” 

“
Thank you, momma.” He hugs
me and turns to walk back into his bedroom. 

After breakfast, Alec walks us to the door
and kisses and hugs both kids before kissing me. “I’ll call you
around noon to let you know what happened.” 

“
All right and good luck.” I
give him my best smile before walking off the porch with the
kids. 

“
Emma?” 

I turn back around and look at him. “Yes,
Alec.” 

“
I love you, and I’ll talk
to you soon.” 

“
I love you, too. Don’t
worry, it’ll be fine.” 

“
I know,” he says, but he
doesn’t sound convinced.

Alec

As soon as court is over, I am surprised to
see the time. It definitely took longer than I expected. I call
Emma to tell her the news, but the phone goes to voicemail. I call
mom and dad before trying Emma again. I look at my watch and it’s
12:45. I decide to drive the short distance to her work to tell her
the news in person. I can’t wait any longer.

I pull up outside of R.K. Insurance Company,
but Emma’s car is gone. I try her number again and it goes to
voicemail again. I tap my fingers on the steering wheel. Emma
always has her phone charged and on her. Brea walks out of the
office and waves when she sees me. I roll down the window and she
walks over to me. “Hello, Brea, is Emma at lunch?” 

“
She ran down to the deli;
she should be back at any moment. Sara’s inside, if you want to go
in and wait for her.” 

“
Thank you, but I think I’ll
wait out here.” 

“
Well, the offer stands if
you change your mind.” She smiles and waves as she walks to her
car. She says, “Would you tell her I had to leave and that I am
sorry to miss lunch?” 

“
I will and be careful.” I
wait a few more minutes before panic hits me. Molly’s threats come
back to me full force. I pick up my phone to call Emma again, but
then she pulls up beside me. I am already getting out of the car
when she looks up at me and smiles. I try to give her a smile, but
I know that fear is prevalent on my face. I close my eyes and take
some deep breaths to try to calm myself.

I open my eyes and the real reason I am here
comes back to me. Smiling, I walk to her car and hold the door open
for her. She gathers the last bag of food and stands away from the
car. I lean down to kiss her and to remind myself that she is
safe. 

“
Hi, I’m glad to see you,
but I thought you were going to call me?” 

I close the door behind her before saying, “I
did call, but the call went to voicemail. Is your phone
dead?” 

“
No, it was fully charged
when I left the house this morning. Did everything go all right
this morning?”
She looks me from one eye to
the other.

“
It did and it’s a long
story, but you are looking at a free man.” I beam. 

“
You’re divorced?” she says,
smiling. 

“
That, I
am.” 

“
You’re a single man with
full custody of Raelynn?” she asks, with wide
eyes. 

“
I am a single man, and I do
have full custody.” 

She stands on her tiptoes and kisses me
publicly. I pull her closer to me and she giggles. “Do you know
what this means?” I ask. 

“
Yes, it means you are no
longer married.” She smiles, brightly. 

“
It also means that we no
longer have to sleep in separate beds,” I say, laughing.

She laughs, too. “Come on. I have to get this
food in here. Traffic was terrible at lunch today.” 

“
Brea said she had to leave,
and she is sorry to have to miss lunch.” 

“
Oh, Arturo was running a
fever this morning. I hope he’s ok. I got her a deli sandwich; you
should come in and have lunch with us.” 

“
I don’t know, I should
probably go.” 

“
If you don’t eat it, it’ll
just go to waste. And you know how I hate to waste
food.” 

“
That is a very good point.”
I take the three bags from Emma and I hold the office door open for
her. I haven’t spent much time with Sara, but she seems very nice.
She talks openly in front of me and I can see what Donovan sees in
her. She has short blond spikey hair and stands about 5’2”; she is
small and petite with a wonderful personality. I like her and it’s
reassuring to know that Emma works with some wonderful
people. 

Later that night, we have dinner at home. I
feel happy and relaxed for the first time in a long time. The kids
tell us about their day.

“
Daddy and Emma, some little
boy pulled my ponytail today at school and it hurt. Heather said he
did it because he likes me. Boys are gross and they have
cooties.” 

“
I’m a boy, and I don’t have
cooties,” James says.

“
Not you, you’re my
brother,” Raelynn says, taking a bite of her corn. 

Emma and I just look at each other and smile.
I like it when Rae calls James her brother.

“
You know what happened to
me today?” James asks. 

“
What, did you poop your
pants?” Rae giggles.

We all laugh, including James. I clear my
throat and use my daddy voice. “Raelynn, that isn’t
nice.” 

“
Raelynn, if I did that,
that would make me have poopy pants.” James laughs as loud as I
have ever heard him. We all laugh and I look over at Emma. She is
trying to cover her laughter and smile with her hands.

“
Hey, hey, they’ll be no
talking about poop at the dinner table.” Emma tries to use her
mommy voice. 

Young kids are fascinated by
poop. They even read books about it:
Where’s the Poop?
by Julie
Markes,
The Truth About Poop
by Susan E. Goodman, and
Everyone Poops
by Taro Gomi. Later,
they become less fascinated. The father of a friend of mine worked
at IBM. This embarrassed his daughter, who thought of IBM as
forming a sentence: I BM — that is, I have a Bowel
Movement
.
 

“
James, what happened with
you today at school?” I finally ask. 

“
When I put my book bag in
my cubby at school, there was a frog in there. Dillon said he saw
it jump in from the open window.” 

“
Eww, did you touch it?”
Raelynn asks.

“
No, they have cooties.
Charlie picked it up and took it outside,” James
says. 

“
That’s nice, James, but can
we talk about something other than cooties?” Emma says,
smiling. 

“
Emma, how was your day,
today?” I ask, to try to change the subject from poop and
cooties.

“
I had a great day, until I
realized my phone quit working.” 

“
Well, that explains why it
went to voicemail when I called you today.” 

“
It was working just fine
yesterday.”

“
We’ll need to get you
another phone in the next few days. I don’t like you not having a
phone.” 

“
My contract is almost up,
so this is a good time to get a new phone. How was your day today,
Alec?” 

I think back on my day and smile. I can’t
share with the kids about the day I had in court. “I had a great
day.”

“
What happened to you today,
daddy?” 

“
Daddy found out that
someone made an appointment to look at our house.” I look at
Raelynn and then at Emma. With all the excitement about the
divorce, I forgot to tell her. 

“
Are they going to buy it?”
Rae asks.

“
It means someone likes our
house and would like to see it.” I look at Rae, James, and then
Emma. Emma is smiling. She knows this will be closure for me. I
smile back at her and reach for her hand. She readily takes it,
like she always does.

“
Can we buy a new house on
the beach?” Raelynn asks. 

“
With a big yard and a
jungle gym?” James adds.

“
We’ll see; I can’t make any
promises.” 

After dinner and our nightly bedtime routine,
Emma opens a bottle of champagne and we celebrate.

She holds up her glass of champagne and asks,
“Would you like to make a toast?” 

“
To freedom,” I say, holding
my glass to hers. 

“
To freedom,” she says,
clinking her glass against mine.

We sit on the lanai and drink the entire
bottle of champagne.

“
Molly showed up at court
today,” I finally admit. 

“
Oh, how was that for
you?” 

“
She stumbled into the
courtroom with another man. They both looked like they were wearing
week-old dirty clothing.” 

“
Alec, I’m sorry,” she says,
sympathetically. 

“
When they called her up to
the stand to contest the divorce, she fell down and the bailiff had
to come over and help her up.” 

“
Oh, Alec.” Emma reaches
over and touches my arm softly. 

“
It’s all right, Emma. When
the judge asked her if she was under the influence of alcohol or
drugs, she denied it. Then the judge asked her if she was willing
to take a drug test, and that’s when it got
interesting.”

I look at Emma and she looks sad. I know it’s
painful for her to hear. Nobody wants to see or hear about someone
in that kind of drug-induced state.

“
She mumbled some obscene
words and the judge told her if she didn’t leave on her own, he
would find her and her friend in contempt.”

Emma looks very sympathetic as I tell her the
story. I decide that I have shared enough with her.

“
I’m just glad it’s over
with, and you have a showing scheduled for the house,” she
says. 

“
That was definitely an
added bonus today. With all the excitement about the divorce, I
forgot to tell you that Madison has scheduled her first showing of
the house for this week.” 

“
I told you everything would
work out,” she says, standing up from the chair. 

“
Yes, Emma, you did. Remind
me to listen to you more often.” I also stand and grab the empty
champagne bottle and the two glasses. 

“
Now, that is something you
can count on.”

Molly

I look through blurred
vision and I think I am at my old house. I have no idea how I got
here. I remember going to court and being asked to leave, but
everything after that is a blur. I stumble closer to the house and
read the large sign in the yard:
FOR
SALE
.
My already
broken heart breaks a little more. I take a drink out of the bottle
of Jim Beam that I am carrying around with me.
If I stay high, I’ll feel less pain,
I
remind myself
.
I
take another long gulp and wait for it to work. It’s not working
fast enough, so I reach in my pocket and take out some pills that
Bobby gave me earlier and chase them with another swig of Jim Beam.
Pain pills never let me down. I just have to wait for
it.