Building Harlequin’s Moon (12 page)

“That’s not what I meant. It’s hard to be
here
. After all these years, I miss Earth and even though I’ve never seen Ymir, I miss that too. I miss the Ymir we would have made. I know they made it.” He looked up into the First Trees. “And we failed—we got stuck here. You can’t know what a shadow this is of both worlds.” He shrugged. “Yoga helps. Making progress here helps too, I guess.” He smiled at her. “But these are my problems.”

“Gabriel,” she hazarded, “what do you want from us?”

“Help. There’s much to do here. There’s more than Council can oversee, and I want you to lead the younger children in making Selene good enough for a lot of people to live here while we build the antimatter collector. I’ve told you that much already.”

“I want to help.”

“You’re doing what you should do. You’re learning.” Gabriel climbed down off the dais. “You see the interrelationships we’re building more than most people do. It might be time to get more of the background you need to really understand the job here. Want to walk for a bit and talk about the next steps?”

Was he finally going to tell her more about his plans? She followed him across the field. Already she was as tall as he was. Instead of going into the First Trees they walked
along the edge, where they could see large expanses of new plantings. Rachel was quiet, waiting for Gabriel to speak. When he didn’t, she said, “You’re always testing us.”

“We have to. It’s a big job we’re trying to prepare you for.”

“And are we passing?”

“You are. And Harry. Nick and Alexandra and Gloria too.”

“Ursula?” She almost had to jog to keep up with Gabriel, though he looked as if he were making no effort at all.

“Maybe. She seems less willing to do things on her own than you are.”

“Ursula and I had a fight today,” she offered, struggling to match his level of revelation. “That’s what made it such a hard day.”

“Over Harry?”

How did he know that? “Because I’m friends with Harry.”

“I know.”

Did Council know everything? She looked away, afraid to meet Gabriel’s eyes. “How do you know about me and Harry?”

He laughed. “Well, it’s not a secret to anybody who has seen you two together. And in a few years you’ll be old enough to contract. It’s a logical pairing.”

“But—Harry and I don’t usually even hold hands around people.”

“We have observation satellites and cameras and pods and other ways to collect data and information. We have to monitor what happens down here. Surely you understand how much information we need to monitor all this?” He spread his arms wide, and then pointed at her. “You yourself gather information from your trees.”

Rachel blushed. Of course she knew about the cams. What had they seen? Was it really private even under the canopy of trees in the grove? Could they hear conversation as well as see people? Did he know about her helping Ursula
so much while they were gone the last time? What must the ship be like if they could see so much? Did they spy on each other this way?

“Gabriel? Will I ever see
John Glenn
?”

Gabriel was quiet for a long time, not answering. He walked a distance away, gesturing at Rachel to stay put. While he was gone, Selene shivered in a series of sharp little quakes. She put her hand down and felt them, imagining Selene was shaking its shoulders.

When Gabriel returned, he knelt down and looked into her eyes. “How about tomorrow? It seems some people aboard
John Glenn
would like to meet you.”

“What?” She couldn’t have heard right.

“Did I stutter?” Gabriel laughed.

“By myself?”

“I’ll go with you. We decided to leave Gloria home with her family for a bit, so if you and I go, it will be one full planting crew less here. Ali can run one crew. There’s less to do in the winter anyway.”

“Really? Me on the
John Glenn?
” She and Harry talked about the ship endlessly, wondering what it looked like, how the Council lived there, how many of them there were.

“I have to go anyway. We’ll stay there at least until spring.”

“Can Harry go?”

“No. One of you will be enough of a shock for Council.”

“But my dad—”

“Will be okay with it.” Gabriel turned and looked directly at her. “It’s time for you to meet the High Council, and more important, for High Council to meet you. You’re going to show them how smart the Children of Selene are. Can you do that?”

Rachel nodded, overwhelmed.

“Be ready just after dawn.”

“I’m supposed to talk to Ursula in the morning.”

“Talk to her before you go, or she’ll have to wait.”

Rachel frowned. She’d promised. “What do I need to bring?”

“A change of clothes.” Gabriel said, “I’ll tell your dad.”

He loped away from her across the field, running easily.

Harry was standing almost exactly where she had gone to sit earlier, by the dais in the center of the field, a huge smile of welcome brightening his face when he saw her. “I was hoping I’d find you up here.”

Rachel slipped her hand into Harry’s, feeling it tremble. “He’s taking me to
John Glenn
.”

“Wow. Just you? Is anybody else going?”

“I asked if he’d take you. He said just me.” How could she make him feel better? “He also said you and I are both doing well. It was weird—he’s never talked so much before. I’ll be there for months, maybe, and I don’t have to take anything. I mean, what must it be like? What will the other Council be like? What will they think of me?”

“Shhhhh,” Harry whispered. “Slow down. You’ll be fine. You just found out?”

“Well, of course, I just found out. I’d have told you. I guess they’re taking Ursula out for the planting.”

“It won’t be nearly as much fun without you.” Harry leaned over and kissed her forehead. “Shall we?”

“Finish what we started yesterday?” Rachel’s cheeks got hot and her belly fluttered.

“Yes.” He leaned over and kissed her, holding her very tight to him, his hand roaming over her back and up her shoulders. He let go and took her hand, turning toward the same place in the First Trees where they’d been interrupted the day before.

E
VENING LIGHT THREW
shadows on the path as they flew home. They landed just above Aldrin, watching lights come on one by one in the tents. As soon as their wings were folded and packed, Rachel threw herself against his
chest, cheek against his shoulder bone, arms tight around his torso. “I’ll miss you so much,” she said.

“I’ll miss you more than I can say. Especially now.” He held her tightly to him, wrapping his arms around her waist. “But think of what we’ll learn. There’s so much they never tell us. No Moon Born has been to
John Glenn
and come back. You’ll have to send me messages.”

“I’ll try. I think Gabriel and Ali get messages from the ship.”

“Whatever happens, record everything you see, everything they say. There have to be more Council up there than we’ve seen. How many have we met? Ten, maybe, in our whole lives? What does being ‘cold’ really mean? Why are Colonists different from Council? Aren’t they all Earth Born? Are Gabriel and Ali really as old as they say they are? How long will we live?”

Her hand went over his mouth. “I promise to write it all down,” she said, laughing. “I know, I’m just as curious.” She bit her lip. “I wish we could both go together. Hey, will you try and be nice to Ursula?”

“I can be polite. Will you try and find out what will happen to Andrew?”

“Why do you still care about him? He hates everyone—he hates me particularly.”

“Do you remember what I told you last winter? He loves you.”

Rachel snorted.

“He doesn’t see the consequences of his choices very clearly. That’s why he’s willing to make Council mad. But he’s smart, and believe it or not, he’s not all bad. He just wants to be the best, and he gets angry when he thinks he isn’t.” Harry picked up a stone and tossed it away, and another one. “I try to help him, but sometimes he doesn’t make room for anyone. But that’s not why it’s important, Rachel. What’s important is that Council can control us so completely.” He looked hard at her.

Of course. “I’ll see what I can find out.”

“Good. How will your dad take it?”

“I feel bad about leaving him. He’ll be alone. I need to go talk to him.”

“I know.” Harry held her tighter, pinning her legs and arms. “But I want a few more minutes.”

She should go home, but the glow she felt, the smell and feel of Harry’s body close to her, were so seductive she put it off for almost an hour. Just sitting with Harry and touching, hardly talking at all. It could never, ever be enough.

Harry walked her all the way home, kissing her at the door. She started to protest. “My dad will see.”

“He likes me all right. I’ll visit him while you’re gone.”

She stopped before they got to her door, leaning into Harry, clutching him close to her, smelling him. “I still wish you could go. I’ll be lonely up there.”
John Glenn
was so far away. “I don’t want to be separated from you. I love you.”

He kissed her again. “I love you too. But you can’t stay, not when you can learn so much.”

Rachel was so absorbed in watching Harry walk away that she jumped when her father put a hand on her shoulder. “I was wondering what you were fighting with Ursula about,” he said.

“Are you angry? Did Gabriel come see you?”

“Angry about Harry? No. Cautious though. And yes, I saw Gabriel. I guess I won’t have to worry about Harry for a while.” He rumpled her short hair so it stood on end, and held her to him.

“I’m coming back, Daddy. I won’t let them keep me up there like they kept Mom.” Rachel didn’t want him to see how scared she felt, so she bent her head down into his shoulder. His arms circled her back, a strong protective hug, except that she felt his hands shaking.

T
HE FORCE OF
the lander’s flight through the atmosphere made Rachel dizzy. Straps dug into her shoulders and thighs. Her head felt heavy against the pillow of the copilot’s acceleration couch. The hull was transparent. Harlequin filled a good part of the view, so brilliant in Apollo’s light it hurt to look. Outside the diffusion of Selene’s thick atmosphere, the gas giant transformed. Colors were brighter, separated, and distinct. Scrollwork storms swirled across the surface. Rachel felt tiny, awed.

“Close your eyes,” Gabriel said.

She did. Why? She felt the thrust of the last few moments of flight lessen, falling away so her body rose against the straps that held her in place. She clutched the edges of the seat, pulling herself down so she stayed fully connected to the chair. Her stomach turned lazily, not ill, but floating. It felt a little like catching an updraft and riding it, but without the pull of wings against her shoulders and biceps.

“Why do I feel so light?”

“There’s no gravity out here. When we took off, engine thrust made you feel heavy, like when we take off in a plane. We’ll still be moving fast, but you won’t feel it the same way.”

“Will there be gravity on the
John Glenn?
”

“In most places. Do you feel sick?”

“N-no. A little dizzy.”

“Good. Now, open your eyes.” Gabriel sounded excited.

A slightly ovoid shape hung in center view. Browns and deep reds and tans floated across it, and just above center, a huge crater filled with crystal blue.
The Hammered Sea!
Selene.

The texture was all interlocking circles and arcs. Veins of blue flowed along the surface, following the arcs or jumping between, reaching out like strands of hair to lace half the ball with thin blue lines. Two tiny spots of green sprouted between two smaller craters.

“Oh,” she said. “Oh—it’s perfect.” She smiled, entranced, the pull of it against her very center harder even than the day she stood at the edge of the Hammered Sea and saw more water than she had known existed.

“No,” Gabriel said, “it’s not perfect. See where the water’s trapped in those two craters? We didn’t mean that—we wanted one sea. The places that are too red? That’s too much iron, miscalculations—”

He was looking at it all wrong! “Look at how pretty the seas are—so what if they aren’t exactly like you thought they’d be? You were excited about showing it to me from here. Weren’t you? Selene is like my garden plot—it’s even better for the mistakes I had to work around. It’s home, Gabriel—it’s beautiful from here. I never knew how pretty the seas . . .” Her words ran off, they weren’t changing the look on Gabriel’s face. “You’re not seeing—”

Gabriel’s voice was stern as he cut her off. “We made it, Rachel. It was nothing before we got here. It was a rock half that size. It’s not like a real planet.”

“But—”

“There’s more to see out here.” His voice changed tone. “Astronaut—get me a ring view.” His fingertips brushed a tray of lights. The little ship began to rotate, so that Selene fell away from her view, replaced with so many stars she couldn’t count them . . . and all around, so she could see new stars she’d never noticed from Selene. Three close-packed bright stars glimmered under her feet. Her stomach
lurched again, and she swallowed. “How are we moving?” she asked.

“Batteries. We charge them with antimatter.”

“Antimatter? I thought you ran the ship dry!”

Gabriel laughed. “We need very little for this sort of thing, Rachel. But to go any distance at all—to go to even the closest star you see—that’s when we need a big store of it.”

“Then why don’t we use antimatter for power on Selene?” She thought of all the time her dad spent maintaining the huge solar arrays.

“We never use antimatter casually. It’s hard to handle. Dangerous if it gets loose. We prefer to move it as little as possible.”

She fell silent, confused at Gabriel’s mood changes. Why didn’t he like Selene? He was always talking about work he did—bragging even. Sometimes he volunteered information, teaching her. Other times he seemed to be keeping it from her.