Cake (61 page)

“
Fuck me,” I pleaded.

“
Later.”

“
Now!”

“
I am not done here yet,” he teased, and then he took me in his mouth, and I growled, throwing back my head and actually growling louder as his tongue swirled and his jaws worked.

“
Will you fuck me…please?”

He came up for air. “No…”

“
Marcus…Please, please, please.”

He surrendered my cock and eased up beside me on the bed, letting his fingers travel over my sensitized flesh. He licked at my mouth, biting my lower lip and sucking at the small amount of blood that came to the surface.

“
You are ready now,” he said, reaching up to the headboard and grabbing hold of a tube of lubricant. Catching my hand he squeezed a generous amount onto my fingers, and I moved to prepare myself, but he caught at my wrist, stopping me.

“
The lube is for me, my dearest Little One,” he said, his voice soft and low. “It has been decades since I let anyone take me, so I know it will hurt, no matter what we do to prepare my body.”

His eyes that stared at me were a warm chocolate fondue that I just wanted to dip and wallow in. Then his words sank into my brain.

“
What?”

“
You are going to fuck me, Xavier…unless of course, you do not want to?” He actually looked unsure, because of my dumbstruck face. “That is alright, if you…”

“
I…don’t know. I’ve…Marcus, help me. I don’t want to hurt you,” I told him, my eyes huge with wonder and wanting.

“
I do not think I have ever seen you at a loss for words before,” he mused. “Your taking of me is only part of what I wish to experience with you, Xavier. I want to share with you.”

Share? I had no idea what he was talking about, and my puzzled expression must have shown that, for he leaned forward and pressed his forehead to mine.

“
When you are inside me, I will drop my shield, and I will share my emotions with you. Will you share yours with me, my Little One?”

My mouth opened and closed, but no words came out.

“
Let us try one thing at a time,” Marcus said as he climbed over the top of me and sat on my thighs. Kissing the tip of my nose, he took hold of my lubricated fingers and pressed them against his backside, urging me to stroke and circle around his portal. Then he took his hand away from mine, allowing me to prepare him for entry at my own leisure. Oh…he looks so beautiful, and he’s scared, but he’s hiding it.

I would never have thought this strong, muscular vampire could ever be scared of anything, yet as I pressed a finger into him, he winced. But he still nodded for more when a second digit brushed against his hole.

I’d been fucked so many times in the past year that I knew damn well one finger was not enough to invite easy access or to prevent mind numbing pain. Maybe I didn’t know exactly what I was doing, but I sure as hell knew what
I
didn’t like or want to experience again. I wanted Marcus to be ready for me when I penetrated him, and so I began slowly thrusting my single finger in and out of him, waiting for his face to tell me when to add more. There it was…His composure dropped, and the smallest of groans came out of his mouth. If I hadn’t been watching for the sign, I would have missed it. He grimaced as I worked a second finger in, bending forward as if he was trying to get away.

“
You don’t have to be gentle, Xavier,” he whispered.

“
Yes, I do,” I told him, pulling my fingers free of his body. “Now, get on your back. I want to see your pretty face,” I said, adding more lubricant to my hand. Marcus obediently climbed off me and stretched out on the bed, and I perched between his legs, grinning at him. “Spread’em, and keep your feet flat on the bed,” I instructed.

There was a brief flash of fear. Again, if I hadn’t been watching his face closely, I would never have seen it. Why would he be afraid of something he wanted me to do?

Marcus had been the family whore, and as Claudius’s words came back to me, I stopped what I was doing. “Marcus, don’t do this if it causes you pain. Claudius told me some of what happened to you as a child.”

There was a long pause and then, as I made to get off the bed, Marcus’s hand came out and caught my wrist, stilling me.

“
Then you know, my preference is pain,” he said quietly. “But you are the first in fifty years that I would trust to do this for me. Do you understand what I am offering you…what I am asking of you? Share with me, Little One. This way, you will know that you are being told the truth.”

“
You don’t tell lies,” I answered, shaking my head. One thing I could be sure of, after living with this big, brown mountain of a vampire the past year, was that Marcus didn’t lie. He didn’t have to. “I just don’t understand how you can want this, when it will be sheer agony for you.”

“
Share with me, and understand.”

I stared into his eyes and felt myself melting. I hesitated at hurting him, but he had worked my body into frenzy and I needed release, and a friendly hand shake wasn’t going to be enough to satisfy me.

“
We’ll do it my way,” I insisted. “Because, there is no way in hell I am sticking my tongue up your ass afterwards to heal tears.”

“
I would never ask that of you,” he said, his mouth quirking.

“
Good, cause it ain’t ever going to happen.”

“
Xavier…” How could he say my name with such…devotion?

I suddenly became aware of emotions hitting at my shield, bumping and knocking gently, without any force behind them at all. They were just there, waiting for me to make a decision about acceptance.

Parting my own shield a smidge, I was hit with such longing, intense desire, trembling anticipation, hard reined impatience and…a little fear. There is was again. He was afraid of me?

“
Even if you cannot share, recognize what I am feeling” he urged, thrusting his body upwards at me. “Fuck me hard, Xavier. I give myself to you. Do what you will.” He relaxed back onto the bed. “I love and trust you, Little One.”

Thanks for the performance anxiety, I thought, as I leaned forward and pressed my fingers gently back into his portal. He might enjoy pain, but I needed my own comfort zone, so I took my time and watched him carefully. He had learned his way around my body over the past year, but I learned about his too, and for the most part, the big guy was a sensual beast…a sexy monkey, well, a sexy, silverback gorilla, though I never thought for a moment that I would ever have my fingers shoved in his backside.

As I worked the third digit into him, pleasure swam over me, tinged with a little bit of disappointment. In the goods department, I was average. There was nothing overly special about my member, and if the honest truth were told, even before Marcus had me, I’d always wanted to be the receiver, not the giver. Deep inside, I think I sucked at fucking.

His hands clawed at the bedding as I pushed deeper inside of him, and he let loose a little groan when I pulled my fingers free.

“
Look at me,” I said, staring down at him. He was like a naughty god spread out before me, his skin flushed with anticipation, and his hair draped like a dark halo all around his head.

He opened his eyes and watched as I positioned myself between his thighs. I should have been excited. I should have had the blood pumping in my ears from carnal longing because I was getting to fuck the man who had fucked me over and over. And yet, I felt nothing. I was being swept along by Marcus’s emotions, but my own were void. I was just a fucking psychopath.

“
I do this because I love you,” I whispered, and as fear and a bizarre keenness ripped through me at this verbal trigger, I shoved in to the hilt.

The absolute joy that hit me was staggering. There was pain there, yes, but it was nothing compared to what he had received before. He had survived much, much worse.

Marcus.

He threw back his head, and his neck was tensed from the strain of holding in his cry of agony as I breached him. Gritting my teeth together, I started rocking into him, hard. There was no artifice about his feelings. He was getting pleasure from the pain I was causing. The harder I fucked him, the happier he got.

Then I got hit with an emotion I sure as hell wasn’t expecting from him. Admiration? He admired me? Why the fuck would anybody admire me? I faltered in my thrusting, and Marcus opened his eyes in puzzlement.

“
Share with me…please,” he gasped out.

I had nothing to share myself, but I dropped my shield for him as I reached up and caught at his hand. He clasped his fingers between mine, drawing my body down lower to rest on his chest. This changed the angle of entry, and now I was getting a white blinding flash of ecstasy as I took up my thrusting in earnest and began hitting his prostate. His ass tightened up hard around my cock, and he cried out loud as he climaxed, that beautiful sound of his release causing all my willpower to fly out of the window.

I came…

I’m sorry Xavier. But this is going to hurt.

A female’s voice in your head, when you are seriously getting busy with a burly he-man type, is never a good thing to hear, and I didn’t have a chance to react as Nightshade tore into my mind, ripping open whatever I had locked away in my psyche. I could feel Marcus’s touch as he wrenched my mental shield wide open to allow her access, and emotions began pouring out of that dark little cauldron of my own making, where I had locked everything in so I could do what had to be done.

Even in the throes of a pleasurable orgasm, this was a pretty nasty tag-team mind fuck. I was unshielded, Marcus was unshielded, and Shade was in the middle of the blast zone. There was emotional shrapnel flying everywhere. I had crushed everything down into a tight, dark place, and now the lid was off I assaulted them with everything; every feeling, every action, every evil thing I had done in the name of my family and my love.

“
You are
not
a psychopath, my Little One. One psychopath in the family is more than enough,” Marcus said, draping his arm across my shoulders and pulling me down onto his warm naked chest.

By rights I should have been thrashing and screaming, but instead I was immobile and weeping. Tears the size of pearls dropped off my cheeks, and snot ran down from my nose. I lay wide-eyed on him, crying and sniffling, and basically being an emotional wreck. His mind was still connected deep inside me, and I couldn’t move, I couldn’t think.

“
Pick an emotion and run with it, Xavier, whether it is sadness, remorse, rage, or guilt. Feel…something.” His breath warmed my skin as it skimmed along my ear and neck.

“
I killed a lot of people today, without blinking an eye,” I said in a monotone voice. And then Marcus had to hold onto me as the results of my actions hit hard, and my body shook from head to toe as I trembled and broke down, crying like I would never stop.

When I finally started calming down, I felt the whisper soft touch of his lips in my hair line.

“
When you were sharing, Xavier, I saw your dreams and nightmares,” he told me. “That is all your fears are…a dream. I would never walk away from you. I cannot, for you are the center of my universe. Stupid boy, you have too much control over me for me to even attempt to leave you.”

I was dripping drool onto his chest, and I quickly wiped the back of my hand against my nose as I raised my head to look at him. Marcus handed me a part of the bed sheet to clean myself up with, after he’d wiped his chest. “Did you just call me stupid?” I asked, stupefied.

Can I eat now? I’m starving.

A large, red head plopped down on the mattress beside us, and Nightshade’s yellow eyes blinked innocently at me.

“
That hurt,” I told her, my tone accusing.

You shouldn’t have been able to lock that much away, Xavier. You are far too young a fledgling for that kind of control. Are you okay now?