Authors: Jillian Hart
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"I don't think the doc was right." Jeremiah Kane pushed his chair away from his desk. The scrape of wooden chair legs against the oak floor echoed in the Helena office that headquartered the territorial Range Riders. Jeremiah rose to his impressive six foot plus height. "You aren't ready to come back, Hannigan. You can't use your arm."
"If I can stand, I can work." Burke leaned back in the corner chair, stretched out his legs and crossed them at the ankles. He wasn't intimidated one bit. "Sure, my arm is in a sling. It's not my shooting arm."
"That's not the point." Jeremiah cornered his desk, came to the front of it and leaned against it. He folded his arms over his chest, a casual stance, but there was nothing casual about his glare. "You push yourself too hard, Burke."
"I have a lot to make up for. What I did was wrong. I was coerced, I was forced, but I still did it." He was a man, unbowed, not that kid who had been frightened into submission. That didn't erase the past. The thing is, the past felt more distant, as if it truly were in the past. "You know it, Jeremiah. You were the first man I shot."
"You shot many, but you did your best to wound, not kill. Not many outlaws take up that philosophy. That says something, too." He paused a moment. The front door swung open, voices rose and fell near the entrance, and the door closed again. They were alone. "I understand why you are driven, but maybe it's time to ask yourself one question. When is it enough? How do you know when you have paid your debt?"
"Never." The answer nearly choked him. He wanted it to be different, but wanting didn't make it so. Reality was reality and no amount of wishing could change it. How could he let go of what he'd done? "What I took can't be replaced. I caused harm. I took a life."
"That's true. But you've spent almost a decade stopping harm, stopping criminals." Jeremiah, tough as nails, boomed out the words as if with anger, but there was no true anger in them. "Think of all the harm you stopped from happening. The justice you helped to find for honest folks who were victimized. You saved countless lives by getting violent outlaws behind bars before they could hurt anyone else."
"It doesn't feel like enough." But he wanted it to be. He ached with the wish down to the marrow of his bones.
"It is. I've spoken with the governor and you are officially pardoned. Your debt to this territory is paid in full." Jeremiah softened, a rare show of emotion. "Maybe it's time to forgive yourself. I have, the government has and I'm reckoning even God has."
He thought of Lila kneeling in the wagon at his side, coming back from Slim and Cheever's hideout. She'd hardly blinked an eye when he'd told her his story. He'd been so sure she would hate him, that she would never understand, that she would see what he saw in himself.
"You are no longer that scared kid. You were never like Cheever. You were a good kid in a bad situation, but you grew up and you rectified what you could of your mistakes. You've made a difference. No one could have done more." Jeremiah shoved off the desk. "It's time to let you go. It's been an honor serving with you."
"Go?" They were letting him off the hook, just like that?
"You are free to be whatever you want. A farmer, a shopkeeper, a railroad worker." Jeremiah held out his hand, palm up. "Son, I'm going to need your badge."
His badge. He pulled it off his shirt and ran his thumb over the raised shield. He traced the rifle and horse imbedded in the silver. Those symbols had come to mean protection and commitment and duty. The raised words above proudly proclaimed, Montana Territorial Range Rider.
It was his identity, all he had wanted to be as a boy. He could still remember the feel of the splintered fence against his palms as he stared between the boards in the orphanage yard, watching strong, impressive men ride by on their fine horses. The Range Riders had been briefly in that town, but the impression they'd made remained.
"I want to keep it." He couldn't give up this life he'd earned, the job God had led him to. Besides, he had nowhere to go, nothing else he wanted to be.
"I'm glad you feel that way." Jeremiah almost smiled, a rare show of mirth. "I hear from the boys you found yourself a pretty little calico in Angel Falls."
"I did." Lila's beautiful image washed into his mind like a cool splash of water on a hot July day. Her soft oval face, her cinnamon-brown hair, her green-and-blue eyes shimmering with love for him.
Have You forgiven me, Lord?
The prayer rose up straight from his soul.
Are You really giving me a chance?
"As it turns out, we are making a few changes around here." Jeremiah opened his top desk drawer and pulled out a shining new key. "The governor has decided he wants a branch in Angel Falls. The railroad has brought more population into that area and a lot of crime has followed. We need someone to run that office. Are you interested?"
Chapter Nineteen
A
new day's sunshine cheerfully sparkled on the windows of Cora's dress shop. Lila considered the display she'd just arranged, adjusted the angle of the darling straw bonnet and plumped the silk ribbon bow. There. The pretty, summery dress Cora had designed as a sample draped perfectly, surrounded by lovely coordinating accessories. That ought to have passersby stopping in their tracks to take a look.
Monday mornings were slow and Cora had said to take advantage of it. So Lila threaded her way around a table of reticules to the front counter, where a fresh sheet of parchment was waiting. She uncapped the bottle, inked her pen and bent to start her latest letter to Meredith.
I hope you are settled back in your schoolroom teaching your adorable students, all seven of them. We loved hearing about them when you were here. I know we miss you already. Things are good here. It's not exactly an adventure novel these days, but I'm enthusiastic about my life. God may be the One to set my path, but it is up to me to make it all it can be.
The musical chime above the door sang out a melody and let in the sounds of the street and the whistling arrival of the morning train several blocks over. Lila put down her pen and greeted her first customers of the day with a smile. "Good morning, Noelle. Matilda."
"Good morning," the cousins called in unison. Matilda with her dark curls and quiet manner led blind Noelle through the doorway.
"Are you looking for anything in particular?" Lila asked, capping her ink bottle.
"Matilda saw the bonnet in the window display and we were suddenly overcome with the need for new hats," Noelle explained happily. "How is your father, Lila? I meant to catch up with your family at church yesterday and ask about him, but my aunt got a hold of me."
"Pa is fine." Noelle's husband, Thad, had been the rancher who had found Pa after he'd been beaten and rushed him to town and rode for the doctor. "His black eye is gone, his nose is nearly healed. The blow to his head turned out not to be as serious as Dr. Frost first feared."
"Now that the outlaws are rounded up and arrested, he can make his deliveries without fear," Matilda added. "It was frightening for a while. Thank goodness the new deputy turned out to be a great help and we are all safe again."
"Yes," Lila agreed, ignoring the hammering blow of grief that struck hard at the mention of Burke. She didn't know if he'd survived his injuries, or if he was well or if he thought of her at all. He had made a great difference to this town and a lasting difference to her. Pride filled her, chasing away some of the sadness. "We have a new shipment of bonnets from back East. Come with me and I'll show you. I just set them out this morning."
"Perfect," Noelle said happily and with her hand on her cousin's arm wove through the store almost as if she could see.
The front door chimed again and Cora breezed in, looking joyful, as she always did these days. Her wedding was less than two weeks away. She was marrying a very handsome bounty hunter. "Noelle! Matilda! How wonderful to see you. Aren't those bonnets adorable?"
"I have to have one," Noelle answered her dear friend. Cora gave Lila a nod, as if to say she would handle the sale, and hurried over to chat with her friends about hats, the upcoming nuptials and Noelle's baby boy, Graham, who was home with his proud papa.
The door swooshed open with a jingle and a gust of dusty air. Tingles skidded down her nape and trickled along her spine. She turned toward the doorway and stared at the man with shoulders braced, boots planted, one arm in a sling. Dark brown unruly hair framed a face so rugged it could have been carved out of stone. The silver shield pinned to his white muslin shirt glinted in the morning sun.
No, it couldn't be. It was her imagination playing tricks on her. Wishful thinking conjuring up the image she cherished most. Her knees buckled and she grabbed the counter for support. She blinked, but he didn't disappear. The ring of his gait, the power of his stride, the love in his gaze made her see. He was no dream or image but a real, live, flesh-and-blood man striding through the shop toward her.
"Burke." She choked out his name. Tears bunched in her throat. Joy dawned within her. The deep grief and the pain of missing him vanished. She gathered her skirts, dashing toward him, drinking in the sight of what she'd missed most. His handsome face, his physical strength and his mighty honor. Integrity radiated from him like the goodness of his heart. "You came back."
"To you." His chiseled mouth tugged up in the corners, softening the hard planes of his face. His midnight-blue eyes radiated a depth of caring that betrayed him. He held out his good arm in an invitation. "I came for you. Only for you."
"I lost hope." She stepped into his embrace and laid her cheek against his chest. "I thought I would never see you again."
"For a while there, I did, too. It took a while for me to heal." His jaw settled against the side of her head, a pleasant pressure that made her feel sheltered and safe. He was steely muscle and solid bone against her cheek, and she could feel his heart beating oddly fast and heavily, belying the calm he projected. "I couldn't stay away."
"I thought you were a lone wolf. A man who had no ties and liked it that way." She smiled into his shirt, holding him tight, so very tight.
"I don't want to go through life with nothing to show for it. Loving someone and being loved in return is the only real living there is." His voice smiled, layered with warmth and affection and conviction. His heartbeat slowed, one reliable thump at a time. "I was merely existing until I met you, Lila. Loving you changed me. A lot of things have changed."
"Like what?"
"I'm a free man. I've been granted clemency from the government. So I looked at God and where he seemed to be leading me and then I looked in my heart. Do you know what I found?"
"I'm breathless to know."
"My love for you. There is nothing but my love for you without condition and without end in my heart and in my soul." He breathed in her lilac scent and savored the silk of her hair against his jaw. She felt
right
in his arms, as if this moment was meant to be. Gratitude filled him and he held her tight. So very tight. "There is going to be a new office here in Angel Falls and I'm in charge of it. Since I'll be staying in town, I was wondering if you could do me a favor."
"Oh, I don't know about that. I've done quite a few favors for you. I've read to you, made soup for you and saved your life, twice. You are out of favors with me." Her rosebud mouth curved upward. Her green-blue eyes shone luminous with her love for him.
Her beautiful, precious love. His throat tightened with emotions too great to measure. For so long, he'd believed love happened to other men. That he wasn't good enough to deserve it, that it was something he could lose and vulnerability he couldn't allow. But he'd been wrong. God was giving this one chance, the one he'd prayed for. He would not waste this chance for Lila. He could make his life new and have the happiness he'd once known and lost as a little boy.
"Maybe you can see your way to granting me one more favor anyway. It's a wish, really. The one thing I want or ever will want." He gazed down at her, not used to being vulnerable, but he was tough. He was strong. He could open his heart without condition or end. "You as my wife. Will you marry me?"
"Marry you?" Humor flashed in her smile. Happy tears filled her eyes. Unspoken love glowed there, the greatest gift he could ever receive. A single tear slid down her cheek and she swiped at it. "It would be my honor to take you as my husband. Yes, I will marry you. Absolutely, with all of my heart."
"I love you, Lila." He brushed away another warm, salty tear with the pad of his thumb. "I love you with all I am and all I will be. I will do my best to protect you and cherish you, my best never to let you down."
"I know, because that's you. The best man. My best man." Infinite bliss seemed to lift her from the ground. His lips met hers with the softest kiss that was sweet, pure and true, just like their love. Theirs was a romance story, after all.
Epilogue
I
t was a perfect day for a wedding. Green leaves rustled musically in the warm breeze that blew through the Lawson family's buggy. Cheerful sunshine made the clear blue sky bluer and highlighted the white church where her beloved waited inside. Lila could barely wait for her pa to draw the horses to a halt. Excitement flitted through her like hummingbird's wings. She was getting married! Today she would become Burke's bride.
"Everything is perfect," Eunice declared from the front seat. "I made three trips to the church this morning to make sure everything has been done to my specifications."
Leave it to Eunice to take charge. Lila knew her stepmother meant well. "Thank you for everything you've done, Ma. You, too, Pa."
"Are you nervous?" Lark leaned close to whisper. She looked adorable in her lavender lawn dress, the one they had sewn together just for the wedding.
"No, I'm not nervous at all." It was a big step to marry anyone, but she was certain of her choice. Burke had told her the entire story of his orphanage years, how he had fallen in with the Cheever gang and the near decade of hard service he'd given as a Range Rider. The test of time had proven his character. He was honorable, righteous and brave. "I keep pinching myself, sure that I am dreaming."
"I can't believe it, either," Pa spoke up. While she and Lark had been talking, he had helped Eunice down and now offered his hand to her. "My little Lila is all grown up. It's hard for a father to face."
"I'm grown up but I'm not growing away, Papa." She swooped down from the wagon, landing lightly on the grass. "Burke and I will be just down the street above Cora's shop. It's not far at all."
"I know, but this is a hard day for me. I have to give you away." He cleared his throat, hiding emotion, and helped Lark down next. "At least it's to a good man. I see that now. I wouldn't have gotten back my horses and wagon if it weren't for him."
"Oh, Pa." Lark rolled her eyes. "You might as well say it. You take him fishing. You said last night at supper Burke was like a son to you. Go ahead and admit it."
"I'll keep my feelings to myself, missy." Pa gently tweaked her nose. "Lila, the door is open. They are waiting for us. Are you ready?"
"Almost." She looked up expectantly. Shadows moved inside the doorway, rushing toward her and took shape. Scarlet with her red curls in a summery dress dashed down the steps. Everyone followed her'Kate, Fiona, Earlee, Meredith and Ruby. Laughter filled the air like a lark song, voices rose and fell with merriment, arms wrapped around her and before she knew it, they were in a circle, arms locked together, her dear friends.
"You look as excited as I felt on my wedding day." Fiona with her dark curls and ready smile looked especially happy this morning. She practically danced in place. "I know you and Burke will be exceptionally happy together."
"If only I had known who he really was, I never would have warned you against him," Scarlet said.
"Or me," Kate agreed. "He's good to you, Lila. He'll make you very happy."
"Yes, he will." She was already transported. Just through that door, her bridegroom was waiting for her. Her engagement ring, a sapphire set between two sparkling diamonds, caught the light at that moment, like a sign from above.
"Is it me, or do you look a little pale, Fiona?" Ruby asked in her gentle, concerned way. "Do you feel all right?"
"Oh, I am probably pale," Fiona said casually. "But I'm not sick."
"Oh!" Meredith was the first to start leaping. "You're expecting!"
"The baby is due around May." Fiona blossomed with happiness. "I have a lot of sewing to do."
"We'll help," Earlee volunteered. Congratulations rose on the wind. So much was changing for them all, such good things. Life, love, families.
"Come, Lila," Pa said. "It's time."
There was a flurry of excitement, her friends gave her more hugs, funny advice and good wishes before they dashed back inside the church. Later there would be a supper party at home for her friends and family with Burke at her side.
Every step she took along the path and up the stairs felt monumental. Sunlight sparkled through stained-glass windows, adding jeweled beauty to the sanctuary. She hardly registered the full pews of well-wishers, or Reverend Hadly at the pulpit or how shy she usually felt in front of so many people.
Her gaze arrowed to Burke waiting for her. How dashing he was in a black suit and white shirt, his thick dark hair tamed for there was no wind inside the church to blow it. He looked vibrant and masculine and invincible, and he was hers. Hers to marry, hers to love, hers to cherish for all eternity. Bliss filled her and her shoes didn't touch the floor as Pa accompanied her down the aisle.
The minister began to speak, but did she notice? Not a chance. All she could see was Burke and the unshakable affection warming his midnight eyes to a gentle blue as he turned toward her.
"Her mother and I do," Pa answered the minister.
In a daze, Lila realized her father released her. Burke gathered her hand in his.
"I'm not nervous one bit," he leaned in to whisper. "Are you?"
"No, only ecstatic. I get to marry you."
"That's my line," he chuckled. "God has blessed me richly today."
"And tomorrow and the rest of our lives." Her confidence touched him down deep. Once Arthur was settled, the minister continued the ceremony. He could only half listen, he had a hard time focusing on anything other than Lila. She looked beyond beautiful in a white print dress sprigged with tiny yellow flowers'sunflowers, he realized.
Thank You, Lord.
He sent a prayer Heavenward. It wasn't easy to forgive himself for that dark time in his life, but he felt that God had. The Lord had looked inside his heart and brought him to Lila. Gratitude left him speechless as he realized the minister was waiting on him.
"I do," he vowed. Never had a man meant those words more. He intended to love, honor and cherish his wife through any hardship and every happiness until he no longer drew breath. She gazed up at him with unfailing love and he had everything he'd ever wanted.
"I do take this man as my husband," Lila breathed, tears glittering in her eyes. "I so do."
Love lit her softly, the same way happy endings came in a fairy tale. With happily-ever-afters and promises that were always kept, never broken.
It was easy to see the future when he looked into her eyes, their loving future. A pretty house for her to make into a home, a close marriage laughing and reading and watching thunderstorms. A baby in a bassinet, maybe another on the way. He saw the years pass, a little boy looking up at the sky to see the pictures in the clouds, a little girl hurrying to join in as Lila tended her flower beds and he hoed up the weeds for her.
A happy family.
Although it was not that time in the ceremony, Burke cupped her chin in his free hand and kissed her sweetly, his wife, his love and the best part of his soul. Understanding laughter rippled through the crowd, the minister cleared his throat and Lila beamed up at him, her infinite love gentle and honest and true.
The sun chose that moment to brighten. Rich light tumbled through the windows and fell like grace on the noble lawman and his calico bride, Heaven's assurance of great happiness to come.