Calling Maggie May (9 page)

Tues, Dec 23

Now that I have some new clothes, Miss Irma has suggested (via Anne) that I expand my page on the website to include
more than just my old head shot from the day I started. It's funny. I didn't even realize Miss Irma had a website. I never thought before about what she did with that photo that Anne took. Now it seems obvious. Who doesn't have a website these days?

Immediately after I found out, I went to look for it online, but I couldn't get into the site. You need a password. The front page is surprisingly discreet, though. It's not like those porn sites that throw up a million pop-ups and start automatically playing a video of a girl and a horse (okay, maybe that was just one site I stumbled on to). You wouldn't have any idea what it was promoting if you didn't already know. There isn't even anyplace for entering your credit-card number. Just a form requesting your username and password but no way to sign up. I wonder how the whole thing works.

I'm honestly not sure about this, though. Do I really want seminaked pictures of myself on the Internet? That seems like the kind of thing people warn you about. Like, what if I want to become a Supreme Court justice or something at some point? Although maybe that ship has already sailed. Maybe once you start having sex for money, all regular ambitions are closed to you.

Still, it does seem like crossing a line of some sort to let someone take pictures. Right now I could stop tomorrow and
no one would really know. Miss Irma has my real name, but she seems pretty good at keeping secrets, or else her whole business would fall apart. The clients know me only as Justine, except for Damon. And then there's Ada. As a group, that seems pretty safe. And even if Damon tried to tell someone at some point, he wouldn't have any proof. Just his story. Maybe it's better to keep it that way. . . .

I don't know. I'll ask Ada.

Wed, Dec 24

Last day of the semester today! Tomorrow we'll all go get dim sum in the city, and I'm looking forward to it. We don't really celebrate Christmas, but going into Chinatown is our tradition, since everyplace else is closed that day. We always have a huge meal and see loads of family and friends.

I'm so glad for a break from school! Except, spending 24-7 with my parents isn't much better. Especially since they saw my grades from this semester:

Chemistry: D

American History: C+

Calculus: D

French: B-

English: C

Art: B

Not good. Mom hasn't even really yelled at me—she just cries a lot and won't speak to me. Boy, you'd think I'd murdered someone! I think she's trying to make me feel guilty. Annoyingly, it's working.

I just have to keep reminding myself that I don't care. I don't care about school, and I don't care about my mom's stupid messed-up priorities. If she'd ever taken the time to really get to know me, she wouldn't be so surprised at how I've been acting lately.

At least Mark is home for school break. Now that I don't care about being the perfect daughter, it doesn't bother me so much that he is better than me at everything. It makes me feel a little better, actually. At least my parents have one kid they can't complain about. He's been really good at cheering Mom up, telling her all about his classes and how well he is doing and how all his professors love him.

I hope tomorrow everyone will be able to forget how awful I've been and just have a good time.

Mon, Jan 5

Back to school today. Mark went back to college right after New Year's, which left me climbing the walls with Mom and Dad all weekend. I'm almost glad to have a reason to get away from them.

I wish I had a better reason than school, though. Ada says it's normal that things get quiet with Irma's business over the holidays and that it will pick up again soon. I hope she's right. I need something to think about other than school.

I found out at lunch today that Jenny and Eiko and everyone went to the movies together on New Year's Day and didn't invite me. Not like I care. But still. In a way, we were never very close, but for a long time, they were the only friends I had. I guess they noticed that I've drifted away from them. And maybe also that I'm not exactly keeping up my “nerd” image, what with my last report card.

I wonder if Ada would go to a movie with me.

Wed, Jan 7

I still haven't been scheduled for any new dates. It's annoying, because I spent all that money on the new clothes, thinking I would make it back pretty quickly. But it's hard to make it back when the phone doesn't ring. Maybe I should get those photos done.

I asked Ada about it and she said it's probably a good
idea. She told me more about how the website works, too. Apparently, it's all done by word of mouth. Everyone who signs up with Miss Irma has to come with a reference, and they never even hear of Miss Irma unless someone is willing to vouch for them. Ada says a lot of Miss Irma's clients are famous, and they could have their whole careers ruined if some nosy journalist found out what they were doing. So everything has to be really locked down.

Anyway, she said I would get a lot more dates if I put up a full photo shoot instead of just a head shot. So I said okay, but then Ada was like, just so you know, it will be expensive.

Of course. It hadn't even occurred to me that I would be expected to pay for all this, and of course Anne never mentioned it. But it shouldn't surprise me, after being charged for Irma's phone and the car service. I'm guessing the money for this will come out of my next date. I wonder when I'll ever actually start earning money from this work.

On the other hand, if I don't do it, it looks like I'll never have another date again. And that's no way to make money.

Sat, Jan 10

I had my photo shoot today. It was . . . awkward. And expensive, just like Ada warned me. I really, really hope it was worth it and this brings some more business to me!

I was really nervous about the whole thing, so Ada agreed to come with me for moral support. She helped me pick out some outfits to bring, since I wasn't sure what to expect or what the photographer would have in mind. Plus, I know the site is totally private and Miss Irma is superconcerned with confidentiality, but I still wasn't sure it was entirely a good idea to put seminaked pictures of myself on the Internet. So I went in there looking cute but basically fully dressed, and as I posed for the guy, he kept encouraging me to take this or that off, or hike up a hem or whatever. And every time he did, I would hesitate and resist a bit, then give in.

The guy was good. He made me feel really comfortable and relaxed, so I didn't mind doing it so much, but I was still kind of hesitant. Then Ada came over during a break and was like, “You should really try to speed this up.”

“Why?” I said. “Jeb says I don't have to do anything I'm not comfortable with. I'd rather ease into it.”

Ada smiled sympathetically and rubbed my arm. “I know,” she said. “Jeb is a sweetheart, and he will let you take as long as you need, until you feel completely relaxed. The only thing is, Jeb gets paid by the hour. And he's getting paid by you.”

That did put things in a different light. I thought about how I'd act with my clients . . . maybe dragging things out a bit
on purpose if I thought I could get another hour's pay out of them. So after that I just bit the bullet and took off almost all my clothes and let Jeb pose me however he wanted. I tried to forget about the camera and my image being plastered all over the Internet.

Now that I look back on it, I'm kind of horrified at some of the pictures I let him take. If my mom ever saw those! I don't even want to think about it. As long as it works, I guess it doesn't really matter.

Thurs, Jan 15

Finally had another date today. I guess those pictures I took are at least doing their job. When I got to the client's room, I did my best to play up the whole Japanese schoolgirl angle, though it was hard to tell if the guy cared at all. He seemed pretty indifferent to everything I did or said. I think he mostly just wanted to pose me like a doll.

It was fine, nothing that crazy or weird, but let's just say that by the end, I was really looking forward to washing my hair. I almost asked if I could use the shower in the hotel room, but I wasn't sure if Miss Irma has a rule about that.

In any case, the guy seemed like he wasn't particularly eager for me to stick around longer than absolutely necessary, so I got out of there.

Made for a gross ride home on the bus though. Luckily, public transit passengers in Seattle are good at minding their own business.

Mon, Jan 19

This date was much better than the last one. The guy was older and kind of smelled weird, but I ended up enjoying my time with him. I think he was mostly lonely and wanted someone to talk to. He told me about his dead wife and about how he has to travel so much for work that hotels feel like home to him. Since he wanted to talk, I asked him to tell me stuff about all the places he'd traveled, and he seemed to enjoy that. I did, too. He had some really funny stories.

The only weird part was afterward, when he got very sentimental and wanted to kiss and cuddle for a while, and then he told me I reminded him of his daughter. Awkward. I'm just glad he didn't mention that at the beginning of the date.

Anyway, I can't really complain because he was a very nice man, and he also gave me a
huge
tip. I'll be honest—that goes a long way to putting me in a good mood. The money itself is nice, and it's also just nice to feel appreciated.

Wed, Jan 21

Another day, another date. This guy was a real creeper, but at least I felt like I was giving him his money's worth with the whole
Asian fantasy. As soon as I introduced myself, he said, “Do you know why I picked you?” I said no and started to undress, while he told me about how he'd been in the military for years, stationed in Okinawa and the Philippines, and how much he missed the whores there. I don't know why, but for some reason that grossed me out. It's weird that people consider me interchangeable with these random people on the other side of the world. But it's not like he knows any of us, so what does it matter?

Still, I hoped that he would shut up once we got down to business, but this one was another talker. He told me all about how he had traveled the world in search of whores who could re-create those experiences, and then he described in great detail what all his previous whores had looked like, including graphic descriptions of certain parts of their anatomy (for which he had a truly amazing memory) and how they compared to my own.

Then, at the end, when I was getting dressed, he said it was a shame he hadn't met me earlier, because he really “prefers them younger,” and he grinned and asked me if I had a little sister. Yuck.

Also, no tip.

Mon, Jan 26

I got called into the office today because of all the school I've been missing when I'm off with clients. The assistant principal
kept me there for almost an hour, making threats and trying to extort promises to reform. I just kept saying it wouldn't happen again. Easier than trying to fight back. They said they would get in touch with my parents, but what good will that do? It's not like my parents can control what I do or where I go in school.

Funny thing was, the whole time she was browbeating me about missing class, she never once asked me what I was doing in that time.

Fri, Feb 6

Originally I planned to write about every date I go on, but I've skipped a couple because, honestly, there's not that much to say. I guess it's like any job. . . . After a while, you're just going through the motions, and they all seem to blend together.

But the guy yesterday was kind of exciting. My first celebrity! Ada told me we get them from time to time, because everyone knows they can trust Irma to keep their names out of the papers.

I know this is my private journal, but before I went on this date, I got a special phone call from Miss Irma herself reminding me of the importance of confidentiality and how I really couldn't tell anyone. And it's not like writing it in here would be telling anyone, but who knows who might find this journal one day? So I'll just say it was a musician. A pop star,
actually. From a boy band! I'll just leave it at that, because if I said anything more, it would become pretty obvious. Luckily, it's not a band I'm actually a fan of, so I didn't have to worry about being too starstruck.

The weird thing is that with a guy like this, you'd think he'd have no trouble getting a date. I mean, anytime it's announced that he's going to be somewhere, girls my age line up for hours and hours just for the possibility of seeing him. Surely a pretty high percentage of those girls would go to bed with him. But I guess I should know by now that it's a myth that guys go to whores only because they can't get it for free. Maybe for some guys, but there are a lot of reasons why people go to prostitutes—confidentiality probably being a big one, in this case.

The plus side of a date like this was that the guy was young (not much older than me, in fact) and really cute. Like, I'd always sort of figured with movie stars and pop stars that they look great in the magazines, thanks to all the airbrushing and stuff, but that in real life they probably look pretty ordinary and you wouldn't even notice them walking down the street. But that was definitely not the case here! I think part of it was him having a very expensive haircut and very carefully chosen clothes and stuff. But there's no question—he was really good-looking. And he had a certain aura about him. Or maybe “magnetism”
is a better word. I kind of just couldn't stop looking at him. But I'm not sure if he's famous because he has this quality, or if he has it because I know he's famous.

The minus side was that he was kind of a spoiled little jerk. Like, he could be charming and powerfully compelling when he wanted to be, but the minute he got sick of that act, it was like flipping a switch. Then it was more like babysitting a two-year-old who hasn't had his nap. Draining!

Still, it was kind of exciting, and I didn't mind putting up with it for a few hours. I did feel kind of bad for his regular handlers, who have to deal with him all day, every day. Glad that's not my job.