Can't Always Get What You Want (42 page)

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Authors: Chelsey Krause

BOOK: Can't Always Get What You Want

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“Rough day?”

I sighed. “You could say that.”

Brody played with the wavy strands of my hair, his deep voice lowering. “Why didn’t you call me last night, or text me back today?”

“Didn’t really feel like talking.”

“Even to me? We used to talk about everything, remember?” He let out a breath when I wouldn’t answer. “Letz, I thought we were starting to get somewhere.”

His other nickname for me shouldn’t have tugged on my heart the way it did, but everything “Brody” had that effect on me. “I thought so, too.”

“What changed?”

I motioned to where his teammates disappeared. “Isn’t it obvious? My batshit crazy father showed up, reminding me why you’re better off without me.”

Brody dragged his fingers through his chin-length blond hair. “I can’t believe you’re doing this to us again.”

My hands fell to my side. “Brody, I’m not trying to hurt you. Why can’t you just accept that I’m not the best person for you?”

“Why can’t you accept what you mean to me?”

My head lowered. I wasn’t the type of girl who cried much. But when it came to him, it was impossible to fight back the tears. Someone like Brody was never supposed to fall for someone like me. I was a minority from the wrong side of town. He was the popular athlete who came from wealth and who all the pretty, drama-free girls swarmed, waiting for their chance to pounce.

“Because we don’t belong together,” I answered truthfully.

“That doesn’t make sense. We spent our first year attached at the hip, having fun, raising hell.” His tone deepened. “And when you finally wised up and realized how bad I wanted you, no one could pry us apart.”

I covered my eyes. “Brody,
don’t
. I can’t think about us that way.”

“And I can’t stop.” His large hands enclosed my wrists and slowly lowered them. “I meant what I said at camp. You fucking broke my heart.”

Sadness and anger crossed his features, but he wasn’t the only one affected by what I’d done. My voice trembled. “Do you think it was easy for me to let you go? You weren’t the only one crushed. I cried every day for a month when we broke up.”

“Then why did you do it? And why are you doing this now?”

My vision blurred as I thought about that horrible day when I severed our relationship. Carlos had busted my nose and given me a concussion after arriving coked up at a family party. Brody had watched the blood pouring out of me, unable to break free from the men holding him back. I would have given anything to spare him from that part of my life. Instead he’d seen it all. “I’ll never be good enough for you, and you know it.”

“You’re wrong.” He drew me to him. His lips pushed against me until mine parted and allowed him in. I shouldn’t have. I knew I shouldn’t have, but my resolve crumbled and I gave in, linking my arms around his neck.

His strong arms wrapped around my waist and he deepened our kiss. His tongue flicked over mine, circling and taunting me to play. My spine arched as he pulled me tighter against his body. He hadn’t kissed me since the day I walked away, and now I didn’t want him to stop.

I moaned softly, returning his show of affection with equal force and enthusiasm. God, I’d missed that mouth. Our kiss intensified, turning into more. We took our time, as if nothing else mattered. When we finally parted, we were both panting.

“We shouldn’t have done that,” I told him.

He smirked. “Yeah, we should’ve. Truth is, I don’t know why we stopped.”

I edged away when he tried to kiss me again, wishing life were that easy.

Brody cupped my chin, tilting it gently so I’d meet his face. “Letz, come on. We’re better off together than apart.”

I lowered my lashes. “You can’t mean that.”

“Yeah, I do. I spent all last year trying like hell to get over you.”

My hands splayed across the bulky muscles of his broad chest. This time it was my turn to smirk. “Oh, yeah. I saw all the girls offering to help you out with your dilemma.”

He cocked his head to the side. “Just like I saw you and Justin Kalabrowski making out at the No-Pants dance.”

“I wasn’t making out with him.”

“Yeah, you were. You were in the hall near the bathroom and it took everything I had not to pound the shit out of him.”

I raised my eyebrows. “I would think Karen Enderson, your date for the evening, would have had a problem with that. Or was it Linda Marrington? Or Jessica Gustfenson? Or Cindy Vincent? Hmmm, maybe I’m confusing them with Lissette Miller.” I tapped my fingers against him. “Did I miss anyone?”

He grinned. “Wendy Jenner.”

My teeth clenched. “Oh, yes, good ol’ Wendy. The girl who yodels during sex. How could I forget?”

“I hear it’s not really a yodel, more like an excited vibrato.” He laughed when I did, but then his expression grew somber. “For the record, none of them meant anything. Just girls I went out with a few times.”

I smiled softly. “And for the record, I didn’t kiss Justin. He kissed me.”

He rolled his eyes. “Lety, I saw you. The guy was on you like a piece of duct tape.”

“If you saw that, did you see me knee him in the nuts when I told him to stop and he wouldn’t?”

Anger tightened the muscle beneath his palms and deepened his tone. “No. I didn’t.”

“Well, that’s what happened.”

“I always hated that kid. Remind me to beat his ass next time I see him.” My head fell against his chest when he pulled me closer. I listened to the steady beat of his strong heart, feeling a sense of peace I hadn’t felt in forever.

“It didn’t work, you know,” he said after a long moment.

“What didn’t work?”

“Dating all those girls. I never got over you.”

I clutched the fabric of his gray T-shirt. I knew what he meant. The few dates my girlfriends had talked me into going on were boring at best. None of those guys drew an easy smile or made me happy like Brody did. None of them made me feel sexy and wanted. Brody had been my everything, except I knew that I couldn’t offer him everything in return.

His hands trailed further down my back. “If you didn’t want me, Lety, I swear to God I’d walk away. But you do. I see the way you look at me. And I can tell by the way you kissed me.”

“It was never that I didn’t want you, Brody. I was only trying to spare you from me.”

Brody strengthened his hold. “Letz, I’m not going to pretend like your family isn’t messed up. But if you think you’re the only one with a fucked-up past, you’re wrong.”

His tone had gathered a strange and dangerous edge, and it scared me. “What are you talking about?”

He loosened his hold and dropped his arms away, angling his head to the side. “Never mind.”

“Brody—”

He stood and placed his hands on his hips, staring hard at the ground. For a minute, I thought he was going to bolt.

I rose. “What is it?”

He worked his jaw. “Not now, okay?”

The way he said it made me think there would never be a good time. I reached for his hands and held them tight.

He met my gaze then and gave our hands one hell of a squeeze. “I want another chance with you. Will you let it happen?”

Despite our kiss, I wasn’t convinced we would make it even if we tried. We were just so
different
. “I don’t know if I can, baby. Maybe we’re better off being friends.”

He laughed softly and gathered me to him again. “You can’t call me ‘baby’ like you used to and expect me to just be your friend.”

“Even if it’s the best thing for you?”

He stopped smiling then. “
You’re
the best thing for me. You just don’t know it yet.”

His tone, and his stare drilling into mine, held me in place. My new iPhone, a gift from my brother, buzzed in my duffel bag, giving me an excuse to slip from his hold. I rummaged through the extra pair of sweats and pulled it out to check the screen. It was a text from Dean Riley.

Lety, are you available to meet me in my office first thing in the morning?

I groaned, knowing it wasn’t good news. I spoke into my phone to iMessage her a text.

I can be there at eight-thirty. Does that work?

It didn’t take her long to respond.
Yes. I’ll see you then.

Brody frowned. “What’s up?”

I tapped my finger on the back of the phone, debating whether or not to tell him. “The dean called me this morning. The O’Sullivans are revoking my scholarship.”

“Because of what Carlos did?” Brody swore when I nodded. “They can’t do that.”

“It’s a private college and a private donation.”

“And it’s bullshit discrimina
tion.”

I shook my head. “Not if they’re claiming it’s because of lack of funds.”

“Fucking asshats.”

Yeah, pretty much. “The dean is trying to see about getting me a loan.”

He huffed. “A loan? Come on, with your background and grades, you should be eligible for aid.”

“I maxed out everything I’m eligible for. With tuition rising as it has, I needed that scholarship to stay in school.” I kicked at the gravel at my feet. “I may have to get another job.”

Brody threw out a hand. “You’re already going to be working your ass off as it is.”

“I don’t have a choice.”

His stare locked on to mine. “Yeah, you do. I could just give you the money.”

I straightened. Brody drove a Porsche, came from money, and everyone knew it. Many a gold-digging skank had tried to make him her sugar daddy. I wouldn’t be one of them. And I wouldn’t be my mother. She showed me that I should never rely on a man—for anything.

I snagged my duffel bag. “I’ll take care of it, don’t worry about me.”

“Lety—”

“I’ll be fine.” I hurried down the path toward the residential town homes where I lived, wishing like hell I could just let him go. I meant what I said, Brody deserved better than me.