Captivate Me (11 page)

Something soft caresses my skin, causing shivers to flow through my body. I close my eyes as the worry about upsetting Buzz floats from my mind. Everything dissipates, leaving only the feeling of Buzz remaining.

This is the place I love to be. I crave it. A place where only Buzz can take me. A place I only want
Buzz
to take me.

A sharp sting comes to my ass, and my eyes spring open as a yelp escapes.

When I turn to see him, he has the look on his face he gets when we play. I love that I can give that to him.

He lifts the long rod in his hand before bringing it down hard. I jolt but lay my head down, the burn from the thwack lighting up my globes.

“We need to get a few things straight, Bella,” he says as the leather comes back down, leaving more fire in its wake, and my pussy quivers in anticipation.

He rubs the leather over my skin, my arms, my legs, bringing my nerves to attention. My mind begins to float again as I feel.

“First, you’re mine, Bella.”
Thwack
. “No one touches you. No men flirt with you and try to fuck what’s mine.”
Thwack
.

The burn intensifies, and not just from the leather, but from his words, which make my heart swell. Does this mean what I think it does?

“You don’t talk or flirt with other men, because you’re mine, Bella.”
Thwack
. “Do you understand?”

“Yes, Buzz,” I say as I float.

“That means the only cock you ride is mine. The only one you see is mine.”

Thwack
.

Thwack
.

The burn mingles with the pleasure, and I close my eyes again, letting it take me away as it prickles over my skin.

“Nice,” I hear him mutter. “Fuckin’ love seeing you like this.”

I lick my dry lips and whisper a broken, “Yeah.”

“Do you love me, Bella?” he asks, and it sounds like he’s drifting away, or I am. I can’t tell. This, right here, is euphoria.

When I don’t answer, he brings his hands to my back, rubbing up and down.

“Bella, answer me.”

“Yes,” I respond.

“Good. That means you’re not going anywhere, Bella. By my side, that’s where you’ll be.”

My legs are pulled apart. I thought I had rope on them, but I can no longer feel them. Buzz plays with my clit, rolling his fingers around the nub, and my instinct is to grind my hips.

He squeezes my ass, the fire from his blows coming back to life, and I moan.

“Don’t move, Bella. You get what I give you.”

I don’t like that idea.

His hand comes back, and he plays, moving his finger around inside of me. The ball of wires inside tangles up, sitting on the cusp of blowing. Then he pulls back, only stringing me tighter and tighter. I need to come, need to release this, but he continues his torture, and I take every bit of it.

I float higher above the clouds as my hips are raised, and then Buzz is inside me. His thrusts set me off as white lights flash before my eyes like fireworks in the sky. The pleasure touches every inch of my skin, practically radiating off me. I scream, but I can barely hear it as he continues his thrusts.

He grips my hips hard as the buildup begins again, even though I haven’t fully come down from the first.

With a hard pinch to my clit, I explode, this one more powerful than the first.

Buzz pushes in deep. “Fuck, Bella,” he grunts as he releases my hips, and I fall to the bed.

I soar the high, the one that only Buzz can give me, and allow it to take me away.

Moments later, I lie there, my mind racing, the fuzziness receding.

“Buzz?” I ask quietly as he kisses the top of my head.

“Yeah.”

“I get that you say I’m yours …” I start, not exactly knowing how to word the next part.

“You are, Bella, and I’m yours.”

My heart warms at this, and my train of thought takes a minute to get back on track.

“What about the future? I mean, I have to finish school and—”

He pulls away from me and looks down. “Bella, we’ll work all that shit out. Promise. One day at a time, one second at a time, we’ll work it out.” From the fierceness in his tone, I believe him. Down to my bones, I believe that whatever future Buzz and I have, we will work it out.

For the first time since my father’s death, I feel truly happy.

I pull Bella against me and mold my body to hers. Her breaths are heavy, and her eyes glassy. I hold her secure to me, loving the feel of this woman.

I was pissed at the sight of the other men trying to get Bella. I hope now she understands I’m not letting her go. This is real. It’s been real for a long damn time. Now I need to convince her of that. Her telling me she loves me sealed the deal.

I awake to loud thumps on the door. Bella doesn’t rouse as I slide my arm out from under her, grab my jeans, and pull them on. Opening the door, I find Cruz standing there with an unreadable look on his face.

“Pops wants an update.”

I look at the clock. It’s only two in the morning.

I rub my hand over my face. I haven’t had a chance to go down to the computers after we got back, which will only piss Pops off more.

“Give me fifteen. I’ll run and check the feeds then be up.”

Cruz looks into the room then at me. “Better make it quick,” he growls before stomping off.

Fan-fucking-tastic.

I toss my shirt on then start to head to the computers. I hate leaving Bella, but it’s a must at the moment. I grab the key to her room and lock her door. Knowing she’s safe is my only comfort.

Walking into the room, I find Breaker in my chair, looking at all of the feeds. He always has my back. Now isn’t any different.

“Anything?” I ask, pulling up a chair next to him.

“New? No. But we sure did blow the fuckin’ place.” He hands me a disk. “I saved it on here.”

“Thanks. I need to figure out where this asshole is. There has to be a clue somewhere,” I say, racking my brain but getting nowhere.

I told myself I would stop coming here, yet here I am again. My boots crunch on the grass as I walk along the path, the sun just coming up, brightening the sky. The air is damp with dew, and I inhale the scent of it deep.

I find where I need to be and look down at the granite staring back at me.

Jerry Albert Redgrove

Beloved, father, uncle, brother, and friend

I kick the dirt, and it scatters across the stone before settling back on the earth. The urge to crumble up the flowers on each side of the tombstone compels me, but I refrain. Whoever put them there has their reasons, just like I have mine for being here.

“Hey, asshole,” I say to the ground, and like always, no one answers back. Just once, I wish he would so I could put him back in the ground.

“Don’t,” I tell him as I cower in the corner of the room.

Jerry comes closer with a smile on his face that is anything but happy. It’s evil. I know firsthand.

“Do we have to play this game every time, little Tim?”

I hate when he calls me “little Tim.” Tim is a strong name, a standup name, and being fourteen, I’m getting closer to being bigger.

“Go away,” I order, but he doesn’t listen. Instead, he grabs my arm as I fight back.

I know he likes it when I fight, and I shouldn’t do it, but I can’t help it. Instinct kicks in.

He crashes my puny body against his and moves his lips to my ear. “Either you put out, or your brother does. You pick.”

The fight leaves. I won’t let anything touch Trey. He’s my best friend, and if I can protect him from this, I will.

I close my eyes and wait for it to start.

“This is the last time I’m coming, you worthless piece of shit.” This time, I mean it. I’m done.

I unzip my pants and pull out my cock. Then I piss on the fucker’s grave. Always said I was going to do it yet never have. Now I can check that off the list.

Coming here is totally pointless. It gives me no closure. Even putting him in the ground with his eyes wide as he saw me take his life didn’t give it to me. I’m not sure anything will.

For years, I put up with him touching me, never saying a word to anyone. There were two reasons I couldn’t: One, my mother loved him, and two, he said he would kill both my mother and Buzz. I believed he would. Now I don’t. But as a stupid kid, I did until my mother got fed up with him and got rid of him. Then it all stopped.

I spoke not one word until I got out of the Army, and when I did, it was to Buzz and only Buzz … ever. The only reason I told him was because I had to finish Jerry. I knew he would latch on to some other kid, and I couldn’t live with that fact, especially when I was able to take care of it.

The Army did a lot of things. Training me to kill was high on that list.

Buzz helped me, and the death was so clean nothing was found at the scene. His case was ruled an unsolved crime. It will stay that way for the rest of my days. No way will I spend a second behind bars. He already took way too much of my life as it is.

Somehow, I need to figure out how to let this go and move on. I just don’t know how. He’s dead and can’t come back. He will never hurt another soul again, but he branded mine. I wish I could get it off me—get his filth off—but I fear I never will.

Sighing, I put my cock in my jeans and zip them up. “At least you can’t hurt anyone else,” I say, turn around, and walk away.

This time is the last. I won’t ever come back.