Captive Heart (9 page)

             
Through it all, there was Fabio De Lucca. He had not been wrong, for he was changing as much as she. The taciturn, frightening man he had once been had opened up, and he was coming to terms with the darkness of his past, looking forward to a bright future -- a future with her.

             
That was the problem.

             
One thing Fabio could never change about himself was that all his success in life had come as a result of always wanting more. And he always would want more. Saskia was finding that she was wanting more too. What kind of commitments could she make when something like a film shoot could remake her life in a matter of days? What kind of commitments could he make when work with his firm demanded so much, and ghosts from his old life still lingered?
             
Just the previous month she had gone with Fabio to a charity banquet. Dominique Presnal had been there. She had approached them and chatted, she and Fabio acting like nothing had ever happened between them. It led to one of the few real fights she and Fabio had had. They had made up quickly enough, but it still ate at her. She hearkened back to the sounds that had once come from upstairs and how she had wondered at what they were and how she might become a part of them. It had all been simpler then.

             
On a Wednesday in January, Saskia braved the Manhattan cold and met with the filmmaker. The guy had really good ideas. She had educated herself on his work over the previous few days and was pleased to find that he didn't take makeup for granted in his films. He knew what he wanted and had very specific ideas. Saskia appreciated that. The budget was tight, and the money would not be great, but he stressed that it could open doors. Saskia already knew that, but she admired his realism. This was not just some pretentious nerd with a camera who thought he was the next Martin Scorsese. She took the job and made her way home, trying to get her mind around this bewildering addition to her already unorthodox career. Her friends in the building knew what was up, of course. Ruby, Leo, Suzy, and Kayla were waiting for her at Ruby's place, ready to celebrate with her, just as they had on the day she'd gotten the advertising from Azul. Just like old times.

             
The thought made her chuckle as she watched New York's streets float by the window of her taxicab. How quickly new times become old!

             
When she sat down with her neighbors in Ruby's kitchen, however, it really did feel like nothing had changed. Fabio had to work late at the law firm that night. When he arrived shortly after eight o'clock, the party was in full swing. He had apparently stopped to change along the way. That was odd. Fabio looked no less like a Greek god in jeans and a sweatshirt than he did in a power suit, but he never changed clothes before getting back to his apartment. It was odd enough to be worth commenting on.

             
“Hey gang, can I interrupt and steal my girl away for just a moment? Saskia, can I talk to you in here?”

             
“Fabio, what are you up to?” she asked as they went down the hall into the living room and out of the others' earshot. “I thought you were at the office.”

             
“Saskia, this day's been kind of complicated. I know a lot of things have been complicated lately.”

             
She crossed her arms, looking over her shoulder to make sure the others really could not hear. “Fabio, can we not do this now? This was supposed to be my big day. I'm trying to have a good time.”

             
“I've been trying to have a good time my whole life, until I met you,” he said. “Or at least that's what I thought. It turns out I was fighting against it. Now everything's different, and it's made things different for both of us. That charity ball last month got me thinking a lot about it...”

             
She cut him off. “Oh God, don't you dare mention that woman's name. No, don't say it. You want to go back to the dom life. I understand.”

             
The look in his dark gold eyes was fierce. “You're all the dom life I need, Saskia. I think we established that.”

             
“Then why mention--”

             
“Because I was never happy with it. What was missing was you. What I was trying to say about seeing Dominique at that stupid party was that it made me realize I could never go back. Not to the way things were and not without you. I'm in love with you, Saskia.”

             
A catch formed in her throat. She really could not believe the others could not hear them, but they carried on in the kitchen, seemingly unaware. “Why are you telling me this now? Why tonight? I just wanted to have a good time with my friends.”

             
“Because I need to hear you say it, too, before tonight can go any further.”

             
Why force this out of her now? Why show up from the office looking different than he ever had on any other night? Why make her doubt, when she had almost accepted the idea that she might break up with him, or him with her?

             
Maybe she had always been more like him than either had realized? Maybe he saw that she, too, needed to learn how to let go of control. “I'm in love with you too, Fabio. Dammit, I'm so in love with you, and the reason I haven't been able to be totally happy, with all this great stuff in my life, is because I'm afraid you won't be there with me on the other side of it.”

             
He smiled. “Then why throw a party?”

             
She nodded back to the kitchen. “Ruby and the gang's idea. You know how they are.”

             
Fabio's bronze complexion looked odd when he blushed. It wasn't something he did often. “Actually, Ruby didn't organize it. I did and got her to act like it was her idea.”

             
“What? Fabio, why would you do that?”

             
“Because this isn't just to celebrate you getting the web series.” Without warning, he raised his voice. “Guys! Can you come in here?”

             
Saskia thought he meant Ruby, Mr. Podolski, Suzy, and Kayla, who all filed into the living room. But then to her surprise the front door opened. Into Ruby's apartment stepped, not only her father and mother, but her best friend Stacey as well. Before she could express her shock and ask for explanations, Fabio got down on one knee, producing a small velvet box with the flourish of a skilled magician. “It's your engagement party. Saskia, will you marry me?”

             
Saskia felt like a bigger fool than she had in the apartment lobby the day of their first meeting, not due to clumsiness, but due to her tears of joy. She accepted her beloved's proposal with cheers and applause from all. Fabio, as it turned out, had not been working late at all. He had been at LaGuardia airport picking up Stacey and Mr. and Mrs. Bergen, whose trips he had arranged and paid for - all without Saskia's knowing. Here she had thought she had gotten him out of thinking he had to be the master of everything at all times, yet he had masterminded an incredible proposal scenario right in front of her; and she had never suspected a thing.

             
That night both Saskia's father and her best friend Stacey told her how much they had missed her blue-eyed gawk. It was a look she had tried so hard to get rid of during her adventures in New York. It had earned her the nickname Saski-Blue. She had once thought the big-eyed gawk had to go. Yet somehow, she had achieved her career dreams and won the heart of an amazing man simply by being the girl she already was, and in doing so, she had become the woman she always wanted to be. Ruby's living room became an impromptu dance floor. As Fabio and Saskia gazed into each other's eyes, hers blue-green, his brown-gold, they rejoiced in the equilibrium they alone understood. Each had control of the other in their own way, and together, they would face a life where each could help the other let go.

The End

Further Books By Scarlet Brady Can Be Found At;

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