Cassidy Lane (30 page)

“You still haven’t
heard from him? Text? E-mail? Nothing?” Patti finished tying a small silver bell onto her shoelace.

Cassidy shook her
head “Not a peep.”

“Wow. I’m really
surprised.”

Cassidy leaned her
hands against the wall and pressed down her heel to stretch her calf and Achilles. “Join the club.”

“How long has
it been now?”

“About a month.
Radio silence.”

“And this was
after he made a big deal of wanting to be your friend?”

“Yes. I told
him I had enough friends, and he got upset with me, so I swallowed my pride and agreed to be his friend, whatever that means.” She held up her palms. “Apparently
friends
is the new term for
not speaking
.”

Patti stood up
and put her hands on her hips. “I hate to say it, but Brandon Forrester sort of sucks. He’s hot, but he sucks.”

Cassidy laughed. “I
adore you. Can I just tell you that?”

“Of course you
can. I’m quite adorable, despite what my kids think.”

“I guess I
was right when I wondered if he seemed too good to be true. He certainly seemed perfect for a while there.”

Patti handed her
a pair of reindeer antlers. “You should have gone for pothead Trent at the reunion. Did you let him know when you were coming home?”

“You mean Brandon
or Trent?”

Patti pretended to
stick a finger down her throat. “Yeah, right. Barf.”

Cassidy put on
the headband and adjusted the antlers in front of the hall mirror. “He knows.”

“Maybe you should
just tell him you made it here safely?”

“That sounds a
bit desperate to me.”

Patti shrugged. “Maybe
he forgot the date. Guys are terrible with dates. Roy can barely remember our anniversary.”

“Hey now, it’s
sometime in July,” Roy said, emerging from the kitchen. “Give a guy some credit.”

Cassidy pulled on
a thin pair of gloves. “Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, Patti. Even if he forgot the exact date of my arrival, if he’s thinking about me at all, he’s got to assume I’m home by now. Don’t you agree, Roy?”

Roy offered a
reluctant nod. “I know men can be clueless when it comes to women, but it’s pretty rare that we’re
that
oblivious.”

Cassidy looked at
Patti. “See? From the horse’s mouth.”

Patti walked over
and gave Roy a quick kiss. “I like your horse mouth. Where are the devil children?”

Roy pointed down
the hall. “They’re supposed to be quietly watching a video in the den, but I give it five minutes before I hear a crash and/or a scream.”

“Good luck with
that, babe.” Patti pointed toward the front door. “We’re off to do some jingle jogging.”

Roy saluted. “Heigh-ho.”

After their run
Patti, Cassidy, and Patti’s friend Amy followed tradition and drove to a local bar called the Office for their annual post–Jingle Jog drink. Huddled around one of the outdoor fire pits in the chilly patio area, they clinked their glasses together in a toast.

“To my leg
finally being healed!” Cassidy smiled. “I’m so happy to be healthy again.”

“And to the
most successful Jingle Jog yet!” Patti added. “I can’t believe we had ten other people come out tonight. I didn’t think I had that many friends.”

Amy glanced around
the bar, which was decorated with red and silver tinsel and looking quite festive. “Personally I think joining us for the post-jog festivities—which is my favorite part of the evening—should be a requirement for participation. What’s up with bailing at seven thirty? Everyone just took off.”

“We’re old now,”
Patti said with a shrug. “People need to get home to their families.”

“We’re in our
thirties,” Amy said. “We’re not dead.”

Cassidy laughed. “I
like your attitude.”

“How’s the job
search going?” Patti asked Amy.

Cassidy looked at
Amy. “Are you out of work?”

“No, I just
hate my job.”

“You’re a lawyer,
right?”

“Yep. And I
hate it. I literally want to hang myself every single day. Except for the weekend, of course.”

Cassidy sighed. “Brandon’s
a lawyer.”

“Who’s Brandon?” Amy
asked.

Patti took a
sip of her beer. “He’s that guy from high school I told you about, the one who asked Cassidy out after our reunion.”

Amy’s eyes lit
up. “Oh, yes! I loved that story. So romantic. How are things going with him?”

Cassidy frowned. “Not
so great.”

“What happened?”

Patti stood up.
“Life got in the way,
that’s
what happened.” She looked at Cassidy. “Tell her. I’m going to get us another round.”

As Patti disappeared
inside, Cassidy filled Amy in on the highlights. By the time Patti returned a few minutes later with their beers, Amy was caught up on the situation, and Cassidy’s good mood had gone a little sour.

“I’m sorry, Cassidy.
He sounds like a good guy.”

Patti sat down.
“He
is
a good guy. But in my opinion he’s kind of acting like an ass right now.”

Amy nodded. “Being
a good guy and acting like an ass on occasion aren’t mutually exclusive. If I’ve learned anything after seven years of marriage, it’s that.”

Cassidy picked up
her glass. “I don’t know what to do with his Christmas present.”

Patti made a
pained face. “Oh no, the cuff links.”

Cassidy nodded. “The
dreaded cuff links. I was just telling Amy about how stupid I feel for having jumped the gun like that.”

Amy shook her
head. “Why would you feel stupid? They’re a superthoughtful gift.”

“Yes, for someone
you’re
dating
. He and I weren’t even dating,” Cassidy said. “I think I may have projected all of it.”

“Stop it,” Patti
said. “You did not project it.”

“Stop what? It’s
true. Embarrassing to admit, but true. Besides two dinners and a couple of coffee dates, our entire relationship was via text, with a few phone calls thrown in to spice things up. I can’t pretend it was more than that.”

“Come on, you
know it was more than that.”

Cassidy shook her
head. “It was more than that to
me
, but it clearly wasn’t to Brandon.” She looked at Amy. “Isn’t that how it sounds to you, from an outsider’s perspective? Like the whole thing was silly and fake? And sort of pathetic?”

“I wouldn’t call
it silly or fake, especially given how it began, and I certainly wouldn’t call it
pathetic
, but it does sound like a lot of the relationship was…you know…virtual,” Amy said.

Cassidy pressed her
palms against her eyes. “I’m so humiliated. I feel like the victim of a cruel hoax.”

“I’m sorry,” Amy
said, a rueful look on her face. “That came out wrong.”

Cassidy took a
sip of her beer. “Don’t be sorry. My sister-in-law had the same reaction the other night, and you’ve both brought some much-needed clarity to the situation.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “We barely even kissed.”

“Really?” Amy said.

“Really. So how
can I feel so heartbroken? What the hell is wrong with me?”

“I think the
fact that you
didn’t
hook up with him shows that your feelings are real,” Patti said.

“You do?”

“I do too,”
Amy said. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

Patti sipped her
beer. “You know how they say most women can’t differentiate between romantic feelings and sexual attraction, right?”

“My friend Danielle
can,” Cassidy said.
Or can she?
She wondered how Danielle was faring with the whole Jonathan ordeal.

Patti set down
her glass. “Well, most women can’t. But sex wasn’t a factor in this equation and you still opened up to him, Cassidy. This wasn’t just some physical thing. Sure, a lot of it was via text message and phone, but that doesn’t mean you two weren’t connecting, and to most men an emotional connection is more intimate than sex. Don’t you agree, Amy?”

Amy nodded. “Affirmative,
your honor.”

Patti looked back
at Cassidy. “So who knows what really happened? Maybe he just got scared.”

Cassidy stuck out
her tongue. “Blech. I feel like we’re back in seventh-grade science class right now, only we’re dissecting a relationship instead of a frog. And I still feel sick.”

Amy laughed. “Do
you ever think that maybe the fact that you live in New York is what made you so attractive to him?

Cassidy looked at
her. “What do you mean?”

Amy lifted her
glass. “I’m just wondering if the fact that you don’t live here was part of the appeal, given that he’s clearly in no position to be in a relationship right now, much less a serious one. And then when it started to become more than he was ready for, he decided to throw some ice on it.”

“You mean like
when I asked him to my family’s holiday dinner?”

Amy nodded. “Maybe.”

Cassidy frowned and
chewed on her thumbnail. “I hadn’t thought of it that way. Now I feel even more stupid.”

“I don’t entirely
agree,” Patti said. “No one over the age of sixteen engages in that level of texting if it doesn’t mean something, and no one over the age of thirty breaks off a promising relationship without a legitimate reason.” She put her hand on Cassidy’s arm. “I think he had real feelings for you, and I think he probably still does. He’s just in a bad place right now, and that has absolutely nothing to do with you. And for what it’s worth, I think you should give him the cuff links.”

Cassidy gave her
an are-you-crazy look. “Why should I give them to him? To make myself look even more like an idiot?”

“Stop talking like
that. Because that’s the kind of person you are, that’s why.”

“You mean an
idiot?”

“Stop it right
now or I’m going to throw this beer in your face.”

Cassidy looked at
Amy. “What do
you
think?”

Amy shook her
head. “I wouldn’t do it. If he doesn’t react the way you want him to, you may regret it.”

Cassidy turned back
to Patti. “I think Amy’s right. And she’s smarter than you; she’s a lawyer.”

Patti reached for
a napkin. “I will choose to ignore that assumption, even though you’re probably correct. But regardless, who cares how he reacts? I’m concerned about you, not him. You can be the bigger person here, Cassidy. He said he wanted to be friends, right? So even if he’s not acting like one right now, that doesn’t mean
you
can’t. You can never go wrong in life by being the bigger person.”

Cassidy frowned. “Easier
said than done. I’m the one who’s hurting, remember?”

“I think you’re
underestimating what he feels for you. Even though we all agree he’s kind of being a jerk right now, I’m sure he’s hurting too,” Patti said. “And you can’t discount what he’s dealing with. Watching your mother crumble like that? It has to be tough.”

“I know, but
I still think that if he felt anything for me, I would have heard from him by now. Even Roy said as much.”

Patti shook her
head. “I disagree, and Roy doesn’t know the extent of how much you and Brandon were in contact. Men are different from us. While we tend to look at how our actions impact others, I think Brandon can’t see beyond his own awful situation right now, and unfortunately you’re just collateral damage.”

Amy smiled. “Collateral
damage. That’s pretty good.”

Patti sat up
straight, a proud smile on her face. “Isn’t it? I just made it up right now, and I didn’t even go to law school.”

Cassidy smiled weakly.
“I wish he could hear you guys saying all this. I wish…he knew how hurt I am. I hate feeling this
…
defeated,” she practically whispered the last part of the sentence.

Patti pulled her
car keys out of her pocket. “Want me to tell him? If so, just give me his address, because I have no problem driving right over to his house and telling him. No problem at all.”

Cassidy rolled her
eyes. “Yeah, that wouldn’t make either of us look crazy at all.”