Catching Lucas Riley (29 page)

“That was
your
goal,” Sealey said, giving her a pointed look. “It was never mine. It’s difficult to explain.” Sealey looked away, out into the park, taking a deep breath. He backed away, contenting himself with holding her hand in his.

“Alex, I’ve been interested in you . . . forever,” he finished lamely. “Almost from the first time I ever saw you. But you never looked twice at me. Your eyes were only for Lucas. I know you thought your crush was a secret, but, really, it was obvious. Everyone could see it.” He squeezed her hand sympathetically. “I didn’t think I could manage to make you see
me
until that particular dream of yours had died. And I didn’t think I would be able to convince you to just give up on Lucas. I wasn’t sure exactly what to do.” He gave her a wry half-smile. “But then you solved
that problem for me. You approached
me
on the subject. So I took my opportunity—likely the only one I’d get.”

“But it still doesn’t make sense!” Alex exclaimed in frustration. “How would you helping me get Lucas’s attention benefit
you
in any way? If anything, it was pushing me away from you!”

“Not necessarily,” Sealey answered. And now he started to look nervous. “With you taking orders from me, I had, or I
thought
I had, complete control over the situation. I could guide you where I wanted you to go. You could get to know Lucas, but you could also get to know me. And I thought that maybe you might decide that I was a better match for you.”

“But I didn’t,” Alex stated plainly. “You must have not seen that one coming.”

“No,” Sealey said, smiling ruefully. “Nor did I foresee how absolutely you would captivate my best friend.” He rubbed the back of his neck, his expression self-deprecating. “All this time, I was operating under the assumption that once you and Lucas got to know each other, you’d realize what a terrible match you were. He is very much a homebody, has no ambitions to leave Utah at all. You want to travel, see the world and conquer it. He is quiet and contemplative, humble and modest, and you are . . . well, not.” He smiled apologetically at her. “His family is very resistant to the idea of him ending up with anyone but Olivia, his sister is a manipulative little snot, and his parents are haughty and disapproving. And I mean that in the best possible sense,” Sealey tacked on to the end, looking slightly guilty. “None of those characteristics seemed calculated to attract you. So I thought I was safe.”

Alex watched him as he explained, wondering how she would react once all of it sunk in. She seemed to be operating on a significant time delay, and she honestly didn’t know what she would feel when she actually had a chance to process what she was hearing.

“You underestimated Lucas’s charms,” Alex replied simply. “And mine, apparently.”

“Very much so. Especially yours,” Sealey agreed. “I have to admit, I never expected you to pique Lucas’s interest like you did. I was relying on his devotion to Olivia to keep your relationship platonic. But I was wrong.” He shrugged helplessly. “Luke fell for you. Hard. Everything
spun out of my control, and I saw how stupid I’d been to think that he would fail to see how incredible you are. A guy would have to be crazy to turn down a chance to be with you.”

Alex looked at him steadily. While she had never, for one instant, considered the idea that Sealey might be interested in her like that, she found that the thought wasn’t necessarily an abhorrent one. At all. In fact, she thought she might be able to get used to it with relative ease. But that didn’t mean she was just going to fall into his arms. There were so many things about the situation that still didn’t make sense to her.

“So when did you stop trying to control everything?” Alex asked, clearing her throat to hide her discomposure.

“About the time Luke started asking you out on his own,” Sealey replied. “Once he started showing interest in you without any help from me, I knew I had miscalculated. My goal had been to simply make you realize that your chances with Luke were slim, and to show you that you two weren’t a good match anyway. But I failed to take your appeal into consideration, and really, I completely disregarded Luke’s side of the equation. Once he began to sit up and take notice, I realized I was in trouble.”

“But you stepped back,” Alex pointed out, remembering how Sealey had started refusing to take part in the project after Lucas had asked her out at the gym. “Once Lucas started asking me out by himself, you just let him! Didn’t it occur to you to try to sabotage the whole thing?”

Sealey looked at her incredulously. “Well, sure, but I’d like to think I’m not a completely horrible person.”

Alex raised her eyebrow at him. A vision was forming in her head, a vision of Sealey, holding various puppet strings attached to her arms, legs, and mouth, pulling one or the other to make her dance. To make her dance just like he wanted her to.

“I don’t know,” she answered, her voice taking on a scathing note. “Something about this whole situation smacks of a horrible person.”

“Now, wait,” Sealey defended, holding up a hand. “I admit, I entered into this thing with a manipulative, diabolical plan. It was wrong. I know that.” He reached forward and picked up her hand again. “But, Alex, I panicked. I was desperate to get my chance with you, but I knew
it would never come unless I could get you to give up on your fantasy life with Lucas. I should have just been honest. I know that now.” He sighed, wincing slightly. “Isn’t that pretty much always the answer?” He looked tired as he said it.

Alex bit the inside of her cheek and looked down. How was she qualified to judge him? She hadn’t exactly been honest in her dealings with Lucas either.

“And once I knew that Lucas was sincerely interested in you, I did try to approach the situation honorably. You know, at first.” Sealey cringed, seemingly as a memory hit him.

“Explain that, please,” Alex commanded. “Because I totally missed it, if you did. You were openly competing for my affections at some point?”

“Well, kind of,” he replied, rubbing his neck again. “I’m not very good at the open approach, you know?” He glanced at her, his gaze uncertain. “It’s probably one of my biggest weaknesses. I sit here, crouching behind this tower of superiority and sarcasm. But, really, I’m just this pathetic excuse for a man who’s terrified to be vulnerable.”

His admission was proof to Alex that he was finally willing to face that particular fear. She thought back to the rough, sarcastic King of the Ice People Sealey had been before, compared to the picture of sincerity he was now. The Sealey she used to fear and the Sealey she now actually worried about (what a thought!). It was astonishing how far they’d come in a few months.

“Once I knew that Lucas sincerely wanted to date you, all I could do was try to distract you like any other guy would. I tried to make you jealous,” he continued, wincing slightly as he anticipated her reaction.

The anger was immediately back, hot and fierce.

“Ashley,” Alex seethed, narrowing her eyes at him. “I
knew
there was more going on there than you let on.”

“Hey, before you get all over me for my cruelty in leading Ashley on, let me just head you off. She knew about it. She was in on it,” Sealey replied, holding up his hands as though to protect himself.

“Really?” Alex said, surprised enough that she forgot to sound angry. “But she honestly likes you. Why would she help you make another girl jealous?”

“Well, first of all, Ashley doesn’t really
like me as much as you think she does, and second, she wants Lucas to end up with Olivia even more than
he
probably does,” Sealey answered matter-of-factly. “Besides, Ashley knows how beautiful and smart she is. She’s not worried about finding a husband. And I don’t honestly think she believes she and I are right for each other. She just likes to flirt.”

“So she agreed to hang all over you and you acted like you had decided to reciprocate, all to make me jealous?” Alex asked, disbelieving. She couldn’t believe Sealey had gone to all this trouble, just for a chance with her. If anything, this entire debacle was proof that honesty was considerably less effort.

“It was the only thing I could think of.” Sealey sighed. “Again, apparently I’m of the male variety that will do anything to avoid the horror of having to actually say how he really feels. Of course, all my brilliant plan did was make you mad, because you thought I was leading Ashley on.” Sealey rolled his eyes at the memory but smiled. “Actually, that part amazed me. She was
horrible
to you, and yet all you cared about was how much she was going to be hurting once she realized I wasn’t sincere.” He shook his head. “It just proved to me again what an extraordinary person you are.”

Alex watched him, eyebrows furrowed, still chewing on her lip determinedly. How did she feel about all this? She felt around inside for some kind of idea. She could locate the anger, the frustration, the shock, and the confusion, but what was that niggling at the edges? It felt a bit like . . . relief? Amusement? Hope, maybe?

“Look, Alex. I had pretty much come to terms with the fact I was going to lose you,” Sealey said when her silence became too much for him. “When Lucas told me that he was going to break things off with Olivia when she got home, I knew I had just made everything worse. I hated myself for what I’d done, but at the same time, I loved seeing you so happy. It was probably the most conflicted, confusing state of mind I’ve ever been in.” He grinned weakly at her. “I couldn’t believe how horribly wrong my plan had gone for me. But not just for me. I mean, I wasn’t the only one who was going to suffer. Not only was I losing you, but I would be the means of seriously injuring one of my oldest friends. Because as good and kind as Olivia is, and as much as she would want Lucas to be happy, losing him would have been very painful for
her.” Sealey shook his head. “I couldn’t believe I’d been so willing to risk so many people’s happiness, just to get what I wanted.”

“Hmmm, that’s interesting,” Alex said with a significant look. “Because I seem to remember you accusing me of exactly the same thing.”

“Well, I was in the prime situation to recognize it, wasn’t I?” Sealey replied with a smile. “Really, this entire thing was a lose-lose situation for you and me.”

“How so?” Alex asked.

“Because if you and Lucas had ended up together, I would have lost you,” Sealey explained with a shrug. “And you, in turn, would have been unhappy with him. I truly believe that. But you losing Lucas as you did wasn’t any better because you’ve been miserable, and I’ve been miserable watching you be miserable.” He shook his head, but a soft smile suddenly broke on his face. “Although, I have to say, I can’t quite find the words to explain to you how grateful I am that you are no longer in a relationship with my best friend.” He slid a little bit closer to her on the bench. The sun was going down, and the air was getting considerably colder. Sealey’s nose was beginning to turn red.

Alex watched him, mulling over what he had just said. She agreed with him. She knew she would have been unhappy with Lucas . . . eventually. Everything would have played out exactly as he said, in either scenario. But Alex wasn’t ready to stop asking questions yet, so she didn’t acknowledge this. “So why did you
really
show up on my doorstep that day? The day I was supposed to be telling Olivia about me and Lucas?”

“I actually did come to see how you were doing,” he answered. “I hoped I might be able to
help
you get over Lucas. You know.” Sealey gave her another self-deprecating smile. “But when Kacey told me what you were about to do, I got to realize all over again what an idiot I am. I really thought you were going to do it. I thought you were going to tear them apart, and I had so many conflicting emotions about it. I was furious at you for even considering doing such a thing, but at the same time, I completely understood why you would do it. I was terrified for Luke, knowing that Olivia would do exactly what you wanted her to. She would just step aside. I was heartbroken for Olivia, because that’s what she would be. And I was livid at myself
for causing the whole mess.” Sealey shook his head, his expression far away as he remembered.

“The truth is, I wasn’t actually waiting for you, when you got back,” he said, turning back to her. “I just hadn’t been able to find the energy to leave yet. I was dreading going home and seeing Luke, knowing how devastated he was going to be.”

“But I arrived before you had a chance to escape,” Alex guessed.

“Right,” Sealey agreed. “And then you said the most wonderful sentence I think I’ve ever heard. You said, ‘I couldn’t do it.’ That one sentence fixed absolutely
everything
. I could have told you how much I loved you right then, but suddenly I realized I didn’t know how. Nor did I think, as heartbroken as you still were, that you’d be receptive. So I left. Very awkwardly and ungracefully.” Sealey shrugged. “And here we are.”

Alex was staring at him. Yet again. “You love me?” she asked quietly. She just sat and watched him as he appeared to gather his courage.

“Yes,” he said firmly, reaching out and pulling her against him, his warmth creeping into her chest, his arms encircling her. His face leaned close to hers as he whispered softly. “I love you, Alex Foamer.”