Cat's Lair (45 page)

Eli allowed his body to slip from hers. She shuddered as his cock dragged over her sensitive little bud, the knot of nerves that were already screaming in bliss. He stood carefully and reached down for her, lifting his face for a moment to the rain. The storm had lessened in strength, the lightning moving off to the south. Still, their hair was plastered to their faces, hers down her back in a long sweep.

He drew her into the shelter of his body gently, holding her face to his chest. “You never have to be ashamed of anything you feel, Catarina,” he assured. “Just talk to me. Let me help you.”

She pressed her burning face into muscles cut so deeply in his abdomen. Her arms circled his waist and she held on tightly.

“I don’t want to hurt him any more than I already have. He’s so alone, and it breaks my heart that I couldn’t make him different. That I couldn’t make him better. I wasn’t strong enough, or smart enough. Nothing I did helped him, and I tried. I know I’m not responsible for the terrible things he’s done, but still, I feel if I could have been just a little better at caring for him, I could have helped him. That’s the reason. That’s why I don’t want to help anyone hurt him.”

She made the confession in a small, muffled voice. Eli could hear the tears.

“I wanted him to love me. He was all I had. I tried so hard but I could never do anything right and I could never take away his rage that always burned just below the surface. Only hurting others ever did that. When I knew he was going out and something terrible was going to happen, I tried to hold him there. It never worked. He’d grow worse, pacing, snarling, scaring me and everyone else. Eventually he’d go and when he came back, it was the only time he looked at peace. Relaxed. It never lasted.”

Eli kept his mouth closed tightly, wanting her to tell him everything. The level of trust she had for him was growing or she never would have told him such a deeply private emotion she was clearly mortified of having.

“I feel guilty and ashamed that I couldn’t help him. He needed me, Eli. He really did. I don’t care what anyone says. He needed me and I let him down. All those people died because I couldn’t help him.”

Okay. That was enough. He caught her chin firmly in his hand and tipped her face up to his even as he bent his head. He captured her mouth, effectively silencing her. He kissed her over and over. Long, hot kisses, demanding her response. He didn’t let her breathe. Instead he breathed for both of them, exchanging air, exchanging breath. Making love to her with his mouth. Telling her what she meant to him in one of the few ways he was good at expressing his love to her.

When he lifted his head, both of their faces were wet and he put it down to the rain, although he suspected it was something altogether different.

“I love you, Catarina, because of the kind, generous soul and heart you have. Cordeau loves you in his own way, but you and I both know he’s beyond saving. A child couldn’t possibly have saved him anymore than an adult could now. He allowed his leopard to get the upper hand, probably when he was very young and things were happening around him he couldn’t control. Abuse isn’t an excuse for any of us. We can feel sad for the person, but there are many abused people who choose not to go down that path. You can’t sacrifice yourself, Kitten, it would be useless. He won’t change and he wouldn’t, maybe couldn’t, when you were a child.”

“How do you know?”

“Because he knew you are leopard. A shifter. A female. He had a treasure, a rare, precious treasure and if he was going to stop himself from that kind of behavior, he would have done it then. He knew, deep down, he couldn’t have both. You aren’t corrupt. You don’t have a hint of madness in you. You’re sweet and loving and generous. You’re too compassionate for your own good and that meant your leopard was the same way. He knew that. He saw that and he still didn’t stop. He never will, and his behavior, his choices, have nothing to do with you.”

Eli brushed her upturned mouth gently. “You don’t have to help us bring him down, Cat. That’s my job, not yours.”

She moved even closer to the heat of his body. “He feels invincible. Terrifying. I don’t want you anywhere near him.” She shuddered against him.

Eli caught the long sweep of hair in his hand, wrapped the thick mass around his wrist and pulled her head back, forcing her to look up at him. “You persist in thinking of him the way you did when you were a child. You bested him. Do you realize that? You outsmarted him. Do you have any idea how intelligent you have to be to do that? You lived in his house, right under his nose, and you educated yourself using his personal computer and he never suspected.”

She opened her mouth to refute his statement and he tugged on her scalp until she quieted.

“Do you have any idea what courage you have? Grown men didn’t leave his organization because they feared him. Witnesses refused to testify against him because they feared him. You escaped, more than once. You tried repeatedly. You risked everything when others refused to. What does that say about you, Catarina?”

She moistened her lips and then tugged her lower lip between her teeth. He had no choice but to sweep his tongue across that temptation.

“Kitten, when he comes for you, and tries to intimidate you, tries to make you feel less than him, look him in the eye and believe in yourself the way I believe in you. See yourself the way I see you. You’ll have nothing to fear. You’re prepared. And I promise you, I’ll be coming to help you. I’ll come.”

She knew he would come. He saw the knowledge in her eyes.

She nodded slowly. “I told you all this, Eli, because I know I have to help you and Jake. Thank you for saying I didn’t have to, but I know I do. I can’t allow him to keep killing people. The businesses he has are bad enough, and the men he associates with are equally horrible. The bottom line is, I have to help or I’m just as bad as he is. Tell Jake I’ll give him names, dates and as many deals as I can remember. I have bank account numbers as well.”

Eli felt a rush of pride for her. He knew how difficult the decision had to have been on her. His fingers gentled in her hair, moving through the silken strands to ease the ache in her scalp.

“Baby, what I asked of you, helping us, that doesn’t come from having been an agent. I don’t want you to think, even for a moment, that I would trade what we have for anything. Or use it against you. I love you. If you can’t do this, I understand.”

He watched her eyes change. They went from a beautiful soft blue to a deep cobalt, almost violet. He saw her so clearly. The cat in her. The love in her – for him. His heart jerked hard and his stomach twisted. He brought his mouth down on hers, all the while falling into her eyes. At the last moment, her lashes swept down, thick crescents that veiled her soul, but it was too late. He’d already seen. He already knew.

She’d given him a gift. She kept giving to him. Eli kissed her gently, and then fiercely. Ferociously. Like the prime male leopard he was. Dominant and aggressive, he took her mouth, pouring himself into her. He was possessive and he knew it. He could be jealous and he had a hell of a temper. But he had this for her. Love so intense, so passionate, every time he looked into her eyes the emotion overwhelmed him. And it continued to grow in him.

Her arms stole around his neck, her mouth moving under his. There in the rain, he took her again, lifting her, urging her legs around his waist, settling her over his cock, her sheath a scorching, tight glove of silk wrapping him up the way her legs did.

He was a little wild. A little out of control. He loved feeling her breasts pressed so tight into him. Her head tipped back and her long hair, now soaked with water, hung down her back like a dark pelt. The rain sizzled on their hot sensitive skin, lending the sensation of a thousand tongues lapping gently at them.

She matched his wild, out of control mood, riding him hard. Fast. Her soft little cries, music in his ears while he surged into paradise over and over, the pace almost frantic. He thought he’d hold out a long while, he’d taken her just a few minutes earlier and he usually had great control, but the little downward spirals, the way her delicate muscles gripped and milked had him losing himself in her far too fast.

He felt the explosion building from his toes and moving through his legs. His teeth settled into her skin, the soft perfect junction between her shoulder and neck. He bit down and her entire body shuddered, clamped down like a vise on his and squeezed. He roared her name as she took him with her, as jet after jet of hot seed splashed deep into her.

He knew instantly. Even as his body shuddered and rocked. Even as hers gripped his and milked. He knew. This time, right there in the rain, they had created something beautiful and precious between them. He lifted his head to look down at her. He knew his eyes had gone leopard. Possessive. Satisfied. How could he help it? She was his and always would be his.

“What?” she murmured sleepily. She kissed his shoulder and then his throat.

Still locked inside her, surrounded by her, held by her, he gave a little growl. “Give me your mouth.”

She obeyed instantly, tilting her head so he could kiss her. So he could lose himself there. She was sacred. The mother of his child. His lover.

“Marry me, Catarina.” It wasn’t a question. He wanted it to be, but it didn’t come out that way. It was a demand. An order. He made the command against her soft lips.

He felt her mouth curve against his. He pulled his head back to look into her eyes, even as he eased her feet back to the ground. He hated slipping out of her body, losing the ultimate, intimate connection between them.

“Are you asking me or telling me?” she answered, her hands smoothing down his arms.

He studied her face. “That depends. You saying yes, then I’m asking. You hesitating, then I’m telling you.” He was honest. How could he not be? It was the truth. He wanted his ring on her finger and her name to be his. She belonged to him. With him. More, he was hers, body and soul.

She laughed softly. “That’s so you, Eli. So romantic.”

He looked around him at the steadily falling rain, the thirsty trees lifting leaves toward the drops. “This is romantic.”

“I’ll marry you, baby. Someone has to take care of you properly.”

Her voice was filled with love. She didn’t declare her love, but at that moment he didn’t need her to. He heard it in her soft response. Elation swept through him. He would have taken her again, right there, but he couldn’t very well lay her down in the wet grass, and she looked exhausted.

“Right away. Immediately.” Definitely a command. Accompanied by a growl.

She laughed and shifted, her little female leopard leaping away from him, sprinting toward the dense grove of trees. He ran after her, shifting on the run, feeling his answering laughter. His answering happiness. He didn’t know how he managed it, he knew he didn’t deserve her, but she was his all the same and he knew he’d do anything to keep her.

I
love
you,
Kitten,
he whispered from deep inside his male.

The female teased and flirted with the male leopard over and over and he allowed it, staying close, rubbing along her fur, approaching cautiously when she crouched invitingly and leaping back when she halfheartedly swiped a paw at him. They tumbled together, rolling around in the grass, playing, but always, the male moved his female toward him. Toward the ranch house.

The much heavier male took her there on the porch, pinning her in the way of the male leopard, locking them together, staking his claim.

Eli let his male have his time with his mate, but once he was finished and just rubbing lovingly along her fur, as she lay exhausted and panting, he forced him back and shifted.

The little female didn’t move. He dropped his hand into her thick fur. “Shift now, Cat.” He poured command into his voice.

She obeyed automatically, but she didn’t move from the floor. He reached down and lifted her exhausted body, cradling her against his chest.

“You sleep in this morning and then we’re going to take care of it.”

She rubbed her face sleepily against his chest. “Take care of what?”

He strode into the house. “Go to sleep. Let me take care of you. We’ll get the paperwork done and get married at Jake’s.”

She burrowed closer. “I think I’m being railroaded.”

He laughed softly. “Bet your life on that, baby. I’m not wasting time and giving you the chance to change your mind.”

19

C
ATARINA
pushed away from her desk, stood up and stretched. She loved this room. Their shared office. There was so much space. It was nice sitting opposite Eli, looking up every now and then from her laptop to see his golden eyes on her. The way he looked at her always made her shiver in anticipation. He always looked at her as if he might devour her at any moment. In fact, it was true. More than once he’d ordered her to strip and climb on his desk. More than once she’d dared to crawl under his desk and open his jeans to get what she wanted.

She loved the books that slowly were filling the empty shelves. She knew she spent too much on books, but it was the only thing she spent money on. She threw out her arms and spun in a circle, unable to contain her happiness. The dread was still there, deep in the pit of her stomach and the nightmares had increased so she knew Rafe was closer than ever to her, but still she couldn’t help but be happy.