Charade (14 page)

             
My instinct is to stop him. To use the hand I have on his hip and push him away. I mean, give a girl a minute. I haven’t let anyone take advantage of me in a long time, but then I remember this is what I want. He’s not taking advantage of anything
. We both want the same thing,
so instead of pushing, my hand on his hip pulls him closer.

             
Then he pulls away, but he’s still standing so close to me I can feel every part of him.
Feel his desire for me.
Colt’s breathing’s heaving and I feel the heat of it float across my neck. I’m stuck between asking him why he stopped and feeling slightly glad he did. This is new territory. How do you move forward when your plan is just to hook-up? Do we talk? Just go for it?

             
Stop it!

             
I hate that feeling—not knowing what to do.  Without knowing it, Colt saves me. “You’re a dancer.”

             
I’m wondering how he knew, but then I remember the pictures on the dresser. Me and the girls on my dance team in high school. We’d just won state.

             
“I am.”

             
“Holy shit, I’m fucking around with a cheerleader.” Colt laughs.

             
“I’m not a cheerleader, I’m a dancer. And who cares if I was?”

             
Colt looks at me, steps back far enough that his eyes trace every single spot on my body. I shiver.

             
“You’re right. Why am I complaining?”

             
He steps closer again. So close.
Holy shit, he’s gorgeous.
I’m smarter than to
tell him that
though. His jean are slightly baggy like they always are, his
legs
on either side of me. His hands are on my hips, the finger of his right hand teasing the skin under my shirt.

“How’s your mom?” I ask. It feels right—talking to someone in a situation like this. I think. I don’t want to get too close to him, but I’m actually nervous and I’m not sure how to stop it. Talk or kiss? I know which one sounds like more fun.

             
He tenses just a little. “I don’t want to talk about my mom. Do you?”

             
I shake my head because he’s right. Talking is overrated.

             
Colt pulls off his shirt, hooks one of his fingers through mine and backs up. “Which bed?”

             
Oh, he’s good. He’s definitely done this before. I laugh because had this been a different situation. If I wanted more and he wasn’t so completely different from me, I could see how a girl could lose her head around him.

             
“Something funny?”

             
“The one on the right,” I say rather than answer.

             
Colt lies on my bed and pulls me down behind him. I expect him to go for my clothes, but instead he kisses me again.

             
“Blanket
,
” I mutter, between kisses.

             
“If you’re cold I’m doing something wrong.”

             
“What if my roommate comes home?”

             
“Wuss,” he teases, but grabs the blanket and pulls it over us. I don’t know why I needed it yet. It’s not like we’re undressed, but I somehow feel safer—like we’re not as laid bare as we were before.
             

             
I’m not sure if I mean clothes either.

             
Colt pushes a hand through my hair and takes my mouth again. It’s a slow exploration. Each sweep of his tongue sends little jolts of pleasure through me. They’re like an eraser, wiping away all the thoughts I don’t want to think about.

             
I’m surprised he’s not just going for it. This isn’t supposed to be about foreplay or anything else, but he’s taking his time and I’m grateful for it. Not that I would ever admit that.
And the longer he’s here, the longer I don’t have to think about anything else.

             
His hand slides up my shirt and again, I shiver. All I can think about or focus on is Colt and what I feel and it’s so very much what I need. It’s on my terms and it’s what I want, when I want and it won’t matter if I walk in on him with another girl or if he walks away or anything else.

             
“Sit up.” His mouth is going down my body as his hands are moving my shirt up. I lean forward and Colt keeps pushing until my shirt slips over my head and lands on the floor.

             
His mouth
nips at my breast
through my bra as he uses one hand to unhook it.
Pleasure bubbles inside me. I ache everywhere, but it’s the kind of ache I want.

             
“Oh, God, I can’t believe you just did that one handed. That should make me run right now.”

             
It distracts me from the fact that he’s seeing me without a shirt on for the first time. I want to cover up, but I don’t have to because I’m in control and I don’t freak out anymore.

             
“Do you want to run, Cheyenne?” I expect to hear a joke or feel his mouth, but neither happens. He’s on top of me now and I look at him.

             
His eyes are so blue the sky has nothing on them. “No.”

             
Then comes the smirk and he looks down at my chest. His finger brushes one of my nipples and if it didn’t sound
cheesy I would admit that I feel
that one touch everywhere.

             
“What do you want?” He leans forward and his mouth takes the place of his finger on my breast.
He flicks his tongue across the tip and
I arch toward him.

             
“I don’t know.” I sort of hate the answer. I should know. I should be able to say, but I can’t. I just want to feel and be taken away from everything else. The picture under my mattress and the nightmares keeping me awake and how I thought Gregory mattered when something that small shouldn’t have had any significance on my life at all.

             
And suddenly, I want to cry.
Why do I want to cry?
I shake my head and close my eyes and will the tears away. It’s not because of Colt. God, what he’s doing feels so good. Maybe it’s because it does feel good and I don’t know if I should feel that way right now.

             
When his mouth stops moving, I let my eyes flutter, hoping no wetness springs free.

             
“This is going to give you a huge head and I’ll probably regret it later, but you are so hot,” he says.

             
He’s not even looking me in the eyes
. His gaze is firmly on my breasts
and it’s all so ridiculous and crazy and just what I needed that I can’t stop myself from laughing.

             
Finally, he peers back up at me and the look in his eyes tells me he knows I was struggling a few minutes ago. “Should I keep going?”

             
When did I become so weak? I’ve never had to be coddled in my whole life yet this guy I hardly know has had to do it over and over.
Was there ever anyone to do it before? Or would I have accepted it?

             
“If you don’t, I’m going to have to get angry.”

             
Colt tsks. “We wouldn’t want that.”

             
And then his mouth is on me again
. My nipples tingle at his touch. His hand moves
down. Under my sweats and my panties too. I tense when his finger pushes in—the good kind of tense because it feels so good I can’t handle it.

             
I already feel myself starting to come apart as I move with his hand. Heat scorches up my body. He was right. I’m definitely not cold. Colt’s hand and mouth continue dueling out their pleasure as I bite down hard.
A burst of pleasure shoots through me as he pushes another finger in.
I don’t want to scream, but the slow fizzle inside me is building to a bomb ready to explode at any second.

             
And just as it does, just as I come undone, flying higher and hit with more pleasure than I’ve ever felt, I start to drift my way back to Earth. As Colt’s slides up my body again and I know he’s moving so he can take his pants off. The door jerks open.

             
“Cheyenne! You’ll never guess—oh. Wow. Holy shit!” Andy doesn’t even turn her head.

             
“Andy!” I scream. Colt is on top of me and I’m covered, but I still feel my cheeks heat.

             
“Fuck,” Colt mutters and I’m starting to read him well enough to know what that means. This is over for now.

             
“You mind?” I ask, trying to play it off. “We’re a little busy right now.”

             
A smile stretches across her face and she winks. “I’m out of here.” The door is almost closed before her head pops in again. “Hot. Seriously. You’re way better looking than that other guy.” And then she’s gone.

             
Colt doesn’t move and neither do I. Finally he says, “We’re going to my house next time.”

             
I go for trying to sound as light as he does. “Your fault. You could have called me over.”

             
He’s already moving and sitting up. He leans over the bed, grabs my shirt and hands it to me. I suddenly feel bad because I’m pretty okay and got some relief, but he didn’t.

             
“What about…
?
”

             
This makes him smirk.

             
“Glad I’m amusing to you.”

             
“That’s nice of you to worry about my well-being, but I’m good for now. You’ll owe me one.” He winks and stands up, grabs his shirt and pulls it on.

             
Whatever. “I was getting a little bored anyway. I should do some homework.”

             
“Bullshit.” But he’s smiling and I think he’s having as much fun as me. If this was Gregory, we’d do our homework together. Or he’d keep going, but what I have with Colt is different. It’s not about anything more than this.

             
“I’ll call you, okay?” He looks unsure. Licks his lips and starts to bend toward me, but stops himself.

             
I almost tell him it’s okay to kiss me, but I don’t want it to look like I want him to kiss me if that’s not what he wants.

             
“Sounds good.”

             
With one more glance, Colt heads for the door. His hand touches the knob, but he doesn’t move. I hear as he lets out a deep breath, before he turns around.

             
“Tell me I’m not a bastard for doing this.”

             
He’s not, but it’s cool that he wonders. “You’re a bastard, but not for this. No worries.”

             
It’s the right thing to say because he gives me a small nod and a smile. “Keep that. The honesty.” Colt pulls the door open and steps out. “I’ll see you later, Tiny Dancer.”

             
Just like Andy, he’s gone.

             
I can’t help but think I like that name much better than princess.

             
Still, the thoughts rush back in quickly.
Rolling over, I pull the picture out from under my mattress and cover my head with the blanket. My mind immediately goes where it does every night. Wondering if she knew what would happen when she left me. Wondering if she wanted to leave me and what her last minutes were like.

~CHAPTER NINETEEN~

Colt

             
I tune out in class even more than I usually do. I come because it’s important to
M
om and I do the shit I need to do to get by, but that’s about it. Luckily, stuff like this isn’t hard for me. Are my grades the best? Nope, but they’re what I need to get the scholarships and financial aid I need to keep myself locked up in this place.

             
And it works. The professors feel like they’re doing their job. Mom believes I’m suddenly going to have this incredible life she never did because I’m on my way to a piece of paper that doesn’t do anything to guarantee me a job when I’m finished. It makes her happy which makes me feel like I’m not the shittiest son in the world so it all works out.

             
But today, I feel like being here even less than I usually do. Christ
,
Cheyenne felt good the other day. The little whimpers from the back of her throat. Her body all lined against mine. I’m still trying to figure out why I pulled the breaks. Yeah her roommate came home, but she left and there wasn’t anything stopping me from staying and finishing what we started.