Chasing Ava: A Bachelor of Shell Cove Novel (The Bachelors of Shell Cove) (22 page)

“The truth is my inattention put us both in harm’s way, Logan.”

He looked at her in disbelief. She spared his feelings. “Do not try to spare me a guilty conscience. Let’s not talk about this anymore. I think I should put you to bed.”

“I’m not sleepy.”
 

“I can fix that.” He picked her up, pulled in a deep breath, pushing her honeyed scent to the four corners of his soul. Quieting the fear and the helplessness he felt at almost losing her. He knew in that moment he could never be without her. He loved Ava.
 

It had been a week since the near death experience. Logan was struggling to contain his yearning and frustration. Though he had not made love to Ava, he’d become accustomed to her sleeping beside him. Something she had avoided since the running incident. The events of that day had changed them. Not them, her. She still cooked, but always made an excuse to get back to her house.
 

Logan felt uncertain and exposed. He didn’t care for the feeling. Ava’s workday generally ended three hours before his. But today he had left the hospital an hour early. She’d be in his arms in a matter of minutes. They would have dinner together and he would talk her into staying with him. He smiled to himself at the thought of Ava gracing his sheets tonight.

Chapter 11

Logan maneuvered the Lexus sedan into the garage of his Avondale address and his mood immediately darkened. Ava’s Jeep was not in the second parking space. Not bothering to exit the car, he dialed her cell phone number, before engaging the hands free communication link on the steering wheel controls. “Hello” was all she said before the line went silent.
 

 
“Is everything okay?” Don’t crush the butterfly. Graham’s words replayed in his head. Don’t jump to conclusions. Don’t jump period. Keep a chain around the testosterone.

“Yes Logan, everything is fine.” If everything was fine she should have been at home waiting for him. Hands gripping the braided leather wheel, blanched knuckles, he struggled to keep his voice level.
 

“Where are you?” he said through clenched teeth. Errands, shopping any number of innocuous activities could have delayed her commute home. She could be en route at this very minute, back to him.
 

“I’m at home.” He heard her take a breath. Silence again.

“I am at home Ava and you are not here.” A lie. The first link in the chain snapped, he felt his control slip.
 

“Logan I have my own house.” Second chain link snapped, ignited the matchstick that lit the flame. Remember she’s the butterfly.
I am in control
. He continued with caution, unsure what to expect.
 

“How long before you’re back here?” A reasonable relationship question he thought.
 

She didn’t respond. “Ava?” It hit him with the force of a steel beam to the gut. She was widening the distance. The plan was not to come back. She’d left his bed, now she’d left his house. If he didn’t put a stop to this, she would leave his life.
Control gone
.
 

 
In a low, steely voice Logan said, “I am coming for you. Be there Ava.” Or crap was going to hit the proverbial fan. But he did not say that aloud. “Do not make me chase you.”
 

Logan peeled out of the garage. Hearing the screech of the tires as he left his driveway, he pressed the gas pedal delivering more power than necessary. An unfamiliar tightness filled his chest as he navigated the back streets to where Ava lived.
 

 
Even though Logan’s home was farther away from the hospital they usually stayed at his house. His remodeled 19th century colonial had a larger kitchen, which Ava loved and an indoor gym complete with mirrored walls and mounted flat screen televisions on each wall. Ten minutes later Logan turned off the ignition in front of Ava’s bungalow style home. He was prepared to use his key to the front door when the side door by the carport opened.
 

Ava stood in the doorway looking adorable in orange boy shorts and a green t-shirt with the Florida A&M University Rattler in the center. Her dainty feet with red polished toes, set off with a delicate yellow gold anklet sparkled in the sunlight.
 

He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding until he reached her and locked in on her intoxicating scent, vanilla, honey and something uniquely her.
 

She reached for him and he bent his six foot two inch frame to meet her five foot four inches, he angled her face upward capturing her mouth and pushing deep between her lips.
 

He plundered her mouth holding until he had to take a breath. He pulled back, guiding her into the small kitchen and stepped fully through the door closing it behind him.
 

She turned to walk away and he snaked his arm around her waist hauling her back to his body.
 

“Ava, what are you doing here?”

She looked down at the floor and did not answer his question.
 

“Please look at me,” he said lifting her chin. “Answer me.”
 

It was a demand. When it came to them staying together he wouldn’t give her an option to leave.
 

Finally she said, “I wanted to come home, that’s all.”

“We have a home, together. What has changed between us that you need to distance yourself from me?” This was not how he saw their night together unfolding.
 

“We shouldn’t be together.”
 

He rocked back on his heels. Her words, a physical blow that threatened to topple him.

“Why are you saying this, now? We are together. That is not changing. What’s the reason that has you trying to end our relationship?” There had to be more than the incident last week fueling her actions. She wasn’t telling him something important.
 

“This,” he felt her slender fingers curl against his dress shirt, “should never have happened.” He didn’t think she was aware of how tight she was holding on to him. She’d narrowed the distance between them, stroking his skin as she spoke. The comfort offered by the action was contrary to her words. The action spoke louder.
 

Encouraged by her fierce grip, he proceeded cautiously with his next question.
 

“You are trying to keep us apart. Why?” When her lips moved to answer he stroked his thumb across her lips. Her eyes slid to half-mast. “If it’s because of the job, or the board position or what happened with Randall I won’t accept it.” He took her chin and tilted her face up. Their eyes met. “Now, tell me why you don’t want me.”

Ava was unable to utter the words that would send them in separate directions. Logan had pressed his advantage and she had surrendered. Considering she hadn’t mounted a fight, surrender was probably a poor word choice. The addiction to him was stronger than her self-preservation skills. But her foolish heart was too busy falling for him to care. And he recognized her dilemma. When she couldn’t voice the words, he took that to mean their relationship was full steam ahead. Powerless when it came to him, she’d unabashedly stumbled on two achy feet back into his open arms.
 

 
Weeks had passed since the,
we shouldn’t be together
fiasco, but Logan was more vigilant now that ever. His mini mansion served as relationship headquarters. His territory. His terms. He stood as sentry determined to keep her from escape. The state of their relationship chafed, because truth was, she didn’t want to leave Logan. Trust seemed to be an elusive target for both of them. In some ways, Logan was just as wounded as she was. Not that she knew why.
 

Ava soon discovered Logan was on a mission. He’d orchestrated events to meet every person of remote significance in her contact list. Run dates today, buying lunch for all the nurses tomorrow. Charm, attentiveness and free food had every nurse giggling the moment he walked on the pediatric unit. He’d even talked her mother into planting a garden in his backyard. Logan had given her mother a key to his house, so she could map the garden at her leisure. He was intrusive, overprotective, and loyal and she was crazy for him.

When Janna came home for one week of leave for her birthday, Logan took the day off work to help her shop for the party. The two of them were instant best buds. The woman actually enjoyed watching ESPN, while most women Ava knew feigned interest. Playing pool and hitting the gym five days a week were a part of Janna’s routine. She was the perfect man’s man, except she was a woman. Thanks to Janna. Two weeks after her departure, Ava was sprawled across Logan’s chest watching Sports Center on a Friday night. The light from the eighty-five inch LCD screen illuminated the darkened room casting a sensual shadow over Logan’s features.
 

Ava tried not to think about Logan naked. But the physical contact with all those flexing muscles and the present fullness in his jeans had her licking her lips. Logan, his usual attentive self, lifted her face up to meet his and took her mouth. As his tongue glided over her bottom lip, she opened to his invasion giving him full access to take as he pleased. Her skin was hot and stretched tight. She instinctively ground her hips into him, wanting more. When he pulled back she mourned the loss.
 

If kissing were a measure of things to come, sex with Logan would be recorded as an orgasm of atomic proportion. She barely had control of herself without them having sex. Images of her riding him untamed with the skill of a seasoned bareback cowgirl had her drenched in sweat and shaking with need on the nights she spent without him. She buried her face in the angle of his neck at the memory.
 

“Are my kisses shameful?” She flicked her eyes in his direction to find him watching her intently. Heat infused her face. His voice was a hot water spring seeping into all the dry, neglected places in her life.
 

“No,” she offered in a husky voice she barely recognized. He sat up then, positioning her higher on his chest. They were face to face now, her hands pressed against his shoulders.

 
“Ava, are you really with me?” Logan and his world tilting questions were forever a stumbling block for her. How to answer his question had her head swimming. She gave what she could, without losing herself. Something that was harder to maintain with each passing day. Could she truthfully reply yes knowing she kept apart of herself hidden?

“I’m with you as much as I know how to be.” That much was true. Cautiously she searched his face, not sure what she would find there. What she saw reflected on his handsome features unleashed a sudden heated rush under her skin. Acceptance, desire, and something deeper than both combined. And that something more had her turning inside out.
 

Logan cupped her face with both hands and gave Ava a long, lingering kiss. This kiss felt different. Unlocking the door to an experience they hadn’t shared before tonight. Wanting him closer, Ava dug her nails in his shoulders, and returned the kiss with a fervor that matched his own. The threads of doubt and insecurity loosened their hold. And she took every ounce of what he promised with that kiss because she wanted him more than anything. Logan released the kiss and she waited. Eyes shrouded in passion, she watched as he placed large hands over her breasts. Eager for more contact, Ava pressed her now aching mounds into his warm palms. She didn’t move when he released the first three buttons on her blouse and unfastened her bra. Pure male appreciation shone in his eyes at the sight of her bare breasts. Ava moaned when the heat of hands soaked into her skin. His caress was liquid heat, raising her temperature to a fever pitch that left her craving for more.