Chasing My Shadow (8 page)

“I can’t wait for that time, and I sure hope I start remembering soon. It’s like being in the wrong body or something. I don’t know what this person has been doing and here I am trying to live his life. I don’t even recognize the guy in the mirror.” Then he laughed and added, “I’m sure glad I am older than I thought or I wouldn’t have stood a chance with you, would I?”

“I’m not so sure about that,” and she laughed, “but I’m glad, too, that we’re nearer of an age than it had appeared at first.”

The next morning when they went down for breakfast Stone picked up a paper. “Do you mind if I just skim the news?” he asked.

“Mind? I’d love it—just like an old married couple, and you can read it to me.” They were both laughing and holding hands when the waiter came for their orders.

After giving their orders they each took part of the paper. Stone was surprised each day at the things that were happening in the world that he seemed to know nothing about. “Can you imagine,” he asked Tara Lee,“what it is like to lose those years and then pick up a newspaper and see this date and all of the things that have been happening?”

“I do, Stone. I think I really do—but I also know that you were aware of all of this once and it’s only a matter of time before it will all make sense again.”

“Yeah, I guess I’ll have to keep that in mind and….Wait.” He read in silence for a minute, then, “Oh, no. Listen to this. ‘Jonathon Newberry, an actor with a part in a new movie by the Del-Roy Studios was arrested last night for drug dealing. It is believed that his accomplice, who is now out of the country, is the once-famous actress, Selina Avery.’” He stopped reading and felt the blood drain out of his face. “I couldn’t have…but apparently I did know her and…where did that money come from? Oh, Tara Lee, I don’t know…and I wrote her a check for….”

She put her hand on his arm and felt him trembling. “Stone, I haven’t known you very long, but you are right. You couldn’t have been involved in anything unlawful. I just know that.”

“Tara Lee,” he said, shakily, “You’ve got to go back home. I don’t want you mixed up with me if this should….That name wasn’t the one I wrote a check to was it?” Remember—for $1200 or…or something?”

“I remember, but that wasn’t the name. The name on the check was Chelsea. I don’t remember the first name but the last name was Chelsea.” Then she added, “If you think I would leave you now, you don’t know me as well as I know you.”

“I just don’t want anyone to even imagine that you are involved in any way with the mess I may be in. I’d feel better if you were safely back in Ulmerton, then there would be no chance of anyone questioning you. Another thing I have had this awful feeling right along that something was wrong here and that I should be gone—far away from here, and whatever the problem is, I don’t want you questioned. I’d rather you would go,” he said firmly, without looking at her. “We weren’t either of us thinking very clearly when we decided you should come out here.”

She sat perfectly still for a few minutes as the waiter brought their eggs Benedict and poured them each another cup of coffee. Stone suddenly thought again of the dollar sign on the notes. It seemed as though that dollar sign must have something to do with the check he had written her for that large amount? What else could it mean? After the waiter left Tara Lee said, “I’m staying as your nurse,” then quickly added, “and driver. Remember you have no license, and if something is really wrong here I want to help you in any way I can. After breakfast we can go in to the Pertula post office and see if you have any mail.”

“I guess that would be all right—if we keep an account so it will be on record that I owe you if anyone questions…and we’ll get another room for you,” he continued.

Tara Lee made no response as they pushed their breakfasts around a while, tried to eat a little, and finished their coffee. Tara Lee went up to their room and packed her things while Stone stopped at the desk and arranged for another room for his nurse. He told the clerk he was well enough now for his nurse to stay in another room.

Things had definitely changed for them now. Tara Lee wasn’t sure how to take the change in her status. She knew Stone still cared about her and was concerned about her, but things just seemed to be different now. Anyway, she knew she couldn’t go home and leave him here to face things alone with no memory of those lost years. If he got his memory back, then wanted her to go home, of course she would go at once.

They arrived at the Pertula post office shortly after 8:30 and Tara Lee stood to one side to wait while Stone joined the line already forming. When his turn came he nonchalantly laid the two bank statements with the address showing face up on the counter and said, “I just picked up my mail and this is all I received. I thought there must be more and wondered if you had any here for me.”

Just as Tara Lee had hoped, the man glanced at the name and address on the statement, then left to check. In a few minutes he returned with two pieces of mail and said, “These are the only ones here and they have already been stamped with your change-of-address. Anything else has been forwarded.” Stone stared at yet another unfamiliar address on the envelopes then, thanking the man, walked out of the post office in a daze. Tara Lee followed him. “Is that all there was?” she asked.

He handed them to her and said, “Look at that change-of-address label.” It was an address in Patterson, New York.

“You gave them an address in New York but not Colburgh?”

“One more thing I don’t know,” he said, wearily, and he opened the car door for her, and went around to the passenger side. He was think-ing—How did I get the address? Where is it? What is it? An apartment? A house? Was I renting or buying it? And always back to the same nagging question of where the money he had deposited came from. He said, “I’m always a step behind where I should be. Now another address. It’s like chasing my own shadow and never quite catching up.”

Neither spoke again for a few blocks as the traffic got heavier. Finally Tara Lee asked, “Does that mean back to New York state to find that address?”

“That would be the logical step and I wish I could, but first I’ve got to straighten things out here—find out if that woman, Selina, really is involved in drug trafficking and…,” he hesitated and sighed helplessly, “and if I’m involved in some way.” Then he thought to himself, How do I know I should leave here, but not know why or if I….”

“What were the two pieces of mail you received?” she asked, interrupting his thoughts, “Maybe they’ll tell you something.”

“Of course,” he pulled one out of his pocket and tore off a corner of it and, with his thumb, ripped it open, and scanned the contents. “This one is from First Nation’s Bank of Pertula thanking me for my business and enclosing the Certificate of Deposit.” He puzzled over that for a minute, then said, “Why would I give them that Pertula address if I had one in New York?”

“Maybe they already had it from another transaction.”

“No, they are welcoming me as a new customer, and they enclosed my certificate that I apparently took out just before I left on that flight—so why didn’t I give them the New York address if I had one? Nothing is adding up very well, is it?”

“I suppose it’s possible you acquired that New York address just before you left on the plane—and things will make sense eventually, I’m sure, when you get your memory back,” she replied confidently.

“When I get my…” he started in disgust, “and what if I never do?”

“It’s barely possible,” she said quietly, as she drove up to the hotel, “but I honestly think you will. Since you don’t know how long it will take, maybe you should go to the police and tell them you have found out that you apparently knew this woman at one time but that you have….” She suddenly stopped as the parking attendant arrived.

Stone took the keys and handed them to him, then as they got to the hotel porch, Tara Lee said, “Let’s sit out here for a little while, it’s so pretty.”

After they were settled in two of the chairs away from the young couple already out there, he said, “I don’t want to tell anyone about the amnesia yet. Even if they believed me, I would still be responsible for whatever I did before then.”

“And if you wait,” she said, “that still won’t change what has already happened either.”

“But at least I’ll know what happened before I have to talk with any-one—if I do get my memory back.”He thought a minute,then said,“Do you realize I can’t even prove I have amnesia. If they called that hospital their records won’t show that I do. They think my memory is fine. Why didn’t I tell Dr. Trainer?”

“Because you didn’t know it then, and if you had known it you still wouldn’t have told him because he wouldn’t have signed your release if you had. Right?”

“I did know something was wrong, but I didn’t know that I had lost those years and….Yeah, you’re right. I probably wouldn’t have told him if I had known. I just wanted to get out of there.” Then he suddenly remembered, “the other letter,” and he pulled the second envelope out of his pocket. He noticed at once that there was no return address. “Oh, no. Another one.” He quickly ripped it open and pulled out the paper and stared at another written note from “$”. He skimmed it and handed it silently to Tara Lee. This one read, “
If you want out of everything, please let me know. I sincerely hope that’s not the case, but I have to know before we can make any more plans
”.
$

He heard Tara Lee gasp as she read the note. “Oh dear, I don’t know,” and she sighed as though in defeat. “You just can’t tell what she’s referring to.” He noticed that Tara Lee said “she” and was sure she knew it was this Selina person. He was almost too numb to wonder what this last note meant. What seemed to be bothering him more than anything else right then was that he had been noticing Tara Lee was more and more often saying “you” instead of “We” when suggesting anything. He knew the change was his fault. That was what he had wanted, wasn’t it, when he got her a separate room? He didn’t want their relationship to change, neither did he want anyone to think that she was involved in any way except as his nurse. Sure, they could prove that she wasn’t, but he didn’t want her having to
prove
anything.

The grounds around the hotel were beautiful, but neither of them noticed, and they finally decided to go back to their rooms and rest a while. Stone bought a paper in the lobby on the way. Later he sat down in a chair in his room and picked up the
Herald
to see a large picture captioned
Selina Avery
on the bottom of the front page. He stared at the picture and would not have known he had ever seen her—then he proceeded to read the article. She had been arrested in France and brought back to the states under guard, accused of smuggling drugs to her friend and co-worker, Jonathon Newberry. He suddenly stopped reading and sat stunned. She had been arrested in France? And that guy had asked him when he had got back from France. He was scared. There seemed to be too many things connecting him with this Selina Avery person—especially that darned check he had written to her. And that signature of a dollar sign could mean that she was going to make him a lot of money. Could he possibly have done that? He couldn’t believe it, but everything pointed to his knowing what was going on.

It was a long article with several pictures of her as well as Newberry, then on the next page a picture of her with Stone. He had a sinking feeling as he looked at it. It seemed to have been taken in a crowded place. Another unnamed man was beside them and shoulders and side views of a man and woman near them on the other side. The paper shook in his hands as he read that the police would like to question Stone Langston, shown here with Miss Avery. They were not accusing him of conspiracy in the smuggling of drugs, but would just like to question him.

Stone, clutching the paper, ran out and down the hall to Tara Lee’s room and knocked on the door. “It’s Stone. Let me in,” he called. She quickly opened the door and he hurried in and closed it as he handed her the paper, pointing out his and Selina’s picture. “I’ve got to go in, haven’t I?”

After scanning the article, she replied, “Yes, I think so. Some people know now that you are here and you may as well get it over with.” One bit of news she relished was that Stone was not referred to as her husband, and if he had been they certainly would have mentioned it. She sighed in relief.

“I wish I knew if I would be getting it over with or just starting something I can’t finish,” said Stone.

“You didn’t…? She’s not familiar at all?” she asked.

“Never saw her before,” he said.

“You know you have, Stone. You were in the picture with her. She is really beautiful.” Then she added, “I was hoping when you saw her that you’d remember. Maybe she looks different from her picture and when you see….”

“No, if I was going to I would have when I saw that picture. I don’t know how I’m going to explain what has happened to me.”

“Easy,” she said, just tell them the truth—that you can’t remember anything since 1983, and of course I’ll back you up. We’d better try and find our way to the police station.” Stone was grateful that this time she said “we”.

They agreed to meet in the lobby in a half hour to get directions to the police station and leave, and he went back to his room to get ready. Suddenly he, too, realized that the item had not referred to him as her husband. Thank God. But he was frightened wondering what connection he had with her. He didn’t want to be the friend of a drug smuggler either. Why was he in that picture with her?

CHAPTER 8
 

Stone was showered and dressed and waiting nervously within fifteen minutes, and he knew it would take Tara Lee the full half hour. He decided to go down to the desk and get the directions now to save time as well as give him something to do. As he left the elevator he noticed two men starting toward the desk. They turned suddenly when they saw him and came toward him instead.

“Hi, Stone. Heard you were back. Come outside a minute, will you? We want to talk to you.” One man got on either side of him and walked him toward the exit as Stone kept looking at the guy who had spoken to him trying to make him look familiar. He hadn’t said a word, it happened so fast. Suddenly he stopped, and said, “No, if you want to talk with me, it can be right here in the lobby. He started toward a row of comfortable chairs on one side. The man who had spoken to him said, “Look, Stone, you’ve got to get out of here before the police come.”