Chinese Ghost Fables 1 (9 page)

38
A TALKING DONKEY

During a business trip, Mr. Yu rode a donkey to Peking. After hours of laborious travel,
he rested himself on a hill and took a nap under a pagoda tree. After a moment and while
he was falling asleep, he vaguely observed the donkey standing up on its hind legs.

Leaning itself again an old tree, this animal admirably observed the landscape, sighed
profoundly, and murmured to himself, "Oh! What a lovely scene! I have not visited this
place for many years. Although the mountains are still as green as before, the roads and
villages are all changed beyond recognition."

From that minute on, treating that beast as his opportunity toward fame and prosperity,
he cordially and humbly communicated with the donkey and never felt a bit tired on his
journey. Strangely enough, the animal acted like all other animals. Mr. Yu patiently
persuaded and vigorously implored this donkey, who never uttered another single word
after that episode. He went so far that he even suggested to the animal that they could be
sworn brothers. Regardless his servile requests, this donkey reacted indifferently, walking
and grinding the grass casually, like all other donkeys do. Finally, Mr. Yu ran out of patience
and sincerity. Aggravated, he repeatedly struck this animal with a rod. Flinching, howling,
and dodging this assault, the donkey was frightened but uttered no words. Due to this
unusually cruel punishment, one of the animal's legs was broken. Mr. Yu had to sell this
crippled animal to a butcher in a great discount price and walked back towards Peking.

This story is both sad and amusing. Nobody really knows for sure that whether this is
Mr. Yu's wild dream or if the donkey could speak a human’s language. Maybe in their
ex-lives, they owed each other either morally or financially, Perhaps, the Almighty destined
them to behave accordingly in order to settle the score.
39
A BLIND MUSICIAN

A blind musician, Mr. Lin, made a living by playing four-stringed lute, p'i-p'a. Once, at
dusk, a servant called to him and said that his master would like to hire him to play his
instrument in a party. They lived on a boat which was parked in a port a few miles away. Mr.
Lin agreed. Carefully holding the lute under his arm, he followed the servant. Strolling for
about four or five miles, the blind musician arrived and a man came to greet him.

After brief amenities, he apologized and explained, in a courteous tone of voice, "Due to
the hot weather and limited space, my master instructed me to tell you that you could play
your lute here, on the shore. We still can enjoy your performance from the boat. Because of
this inconvenience, my master promised to give you handsome tips besides the agreed
fee."

Without hesitation, Mr. Lin abruptly accepted it. Full-heartedly playing it until midnight,
he was thirsty and politely asked for a cup of water, which was deliberately ignored. He
listened cautiously and reckoned the guests’ status. They were laughing and teasing one
another. From the tone of their language and the content of their communication, he
sensed that they were neither wealthy nor on a boat. Could they be those otherworldly
creatures playing a prank on him? Perplexed and frightened, he picked up his lute, stood
up and intended to flee.

A voice severely reprimanded, "Where do you think you are going? What a disgraceful
blind fool! What makes you think that you can stop playing?" Several persons jumped at
and smacked him. He was pushed to the ground, assaulted and injured.

While he was moaning and murmuring, he begged for mercy and promised to continue
his performance. After another few hours of intense labor, he comprehended that those
ferocious guests were gone. However, he dared not to risk his life again.

Suddenly, he heard a person greeting him, "Good morning. How are you, Mr. Lin? What a
lovely day it is? Why do you get up so early, sitting among those deserted graves and
practicing your lute?" The blind musician recognized the voice, which was from one of his
neighbors. Peddling breakfast in the market, he needed to leave home before dawn. The
blind musician knew that he had been teased by ghosts for the entire night. Exhausted, he
embarrassingly took the lute and went home.

In the village, this blind musician has a notorious reputation. Regardless of his visual
impairment, he was cunning, belligerent, and narrow-minded. Many people were victims of
his trivial, but annoying intrigues. Behind his back, they gave him the nickname “Ghost Lin.”
The word ghost here represents sneaky, amoral, and unscrupulous.

Once they learned of this event, the villagers were amused. They often sneered at him
and remarked, in contempt, that a phony ghost met genuine ones. He deserved this
humiliating mockery.

As an old says, "You can outfox persons but you can't outmaneuver the Almighty. After all,
the universe is in equanimity. The person who takes advantage of others will eventually
have a taste of his own medicine, too. "
40
MASTER THE GHOSTS

My grandfather’s neighbor Mr. Pai spent lot of money in order to acquire a rare book of
incantations. The seller claimed that he could use the magic book to control and
manipulate otherworldly creatures. With enthusiasm and excitement, Mr. Pai meticulously
followed its instructions and laboriously practiced them day and night. After a few months of
study, he believed that he had memorized the volume thoroughly and mastered the skill of
casting spells. He confidently went into the city to buy Tao's outfit, which would add dignity
to his new status. On the next day, at midnight, he dressed up and visited a remote,
deserted graveyard, and practiced playing for the dark creatures.

On his right hand, he grasped and waived a wooden sword toward the sky and, he
used his left hand to hold and gently shook a small, bronze bell that was used for
awakening
and
commanding
wandering
souls.
Without
hesitation,
he
proficiently
murmured an incantation and repeatedly cast water, which was mixed with ash of
spellbound paper, toward those anonymous tombs. The ritual had lasted for hours. It
eventually worked.

From nowhere, a breeze mysteriously appeared that tranquil night. A small wind
developed and gradually intensified, it became a gale. They were the indications of the
approaching of evil spirits. With exhilaration, Mr. Pai could barely withhold his emotion and
vaguely, he heard some vicious howling noises from afar. Due to all this commotion, his
mind was a little blurred.

Periodically referring to the valuable book, he recited the spells louder and louder,
zealously trying to speed up the process. Suddenly, an eerie gust of wind swept the book to
the ground amongst the weeds. A ghost appeared, abruptly snatched it, and vanished
himself into darkness. Without that book, Mr. Pai was too nervous to remember the details
of that incantation. He became vulnerable and powerless.

A group of otherworldly creatures showed up and contemptuously browbeat him. They
shouted, "How dare you attempt to enslave us! Imagine that! A below-mediocre human
being intends to subjugate us for your selfish gains. Without that book, you are nobody. We
will teach you a lesson. Be prepared to receive your punishment."

Frightened and flabbergasted, Mr. Pai turned around and ran toward his village.
Chasing after him; the dark creatures cursed, yelled, jeered, threw shingles, stones, and
mud at his back. He was severely injured and bedridden for months.

With
great
embarrassment
and
uneasiness,
he
disclosed
this
episode
to
my
grandfather, who was an old and respectable individual in the village. After some
contemplation, he remarked that Mr. Pai should consider himself fortunate. His failure was
only a personal fiasco. If he had succeeded, it would be a misery for those otherworldly
creatures, and it would have resulted in an ultimate catastrophe for himself.
Working out
its own ways, the universe is in equanimity. By possessing those of “dark power”, he would
have unfairly tipped the scale to his favor and that would bring unforeseen calamity to
himself.
41
REPAIR A COFFIN

My friends Mr. Lee and Mr. Hua once vigorously debated about the existence of ghosts.
Mr. Lee firmly believed that there were ghosts in the world. On the other hand, Mr. Hua
thought the complete opposite.

When they were heatedly arguing, Mr. Lee's servant humbly interrupted, "I didn't believe
ghost before. However, my experience made me change my opinion. A few years ago one,
I walked by a deserted graveyard and I accidentally stumbled upon and damaged an
exposed coffin. Not thinking about it twice, I went home and weird things began to occur. A
few days later, at midnight, I dreamed that a robust ghost had come to subpoena me. The
charge was that I had damaged someone’s roof. With amazement and disbelief, I reckoned
it was about the coffin. I was conveyed to the underworld court. After a brief announcement,
a ghost judge read my allegation and allowed me to respond. In my defense, I pointed out
that his 'house' should not block the route. After all, it occurred at night with poor visibility.
The plaintiff ghost argued that his 'house' was built long before the road even existed.
Carefully listening to both sides, the ghost judge, while smiling, declared his verdict; since it
became a road, everybody had a right to walk on it. He said that the servant's behavior was
not legally at fault. However, nobody broke this 'house' except me. As a misdemeanor, I
was ordered to burn some underworld paper money as to the plaintiff. Furthermore, since
the plaintiff couldn't repair his own 'house', the defendant was obligated to buy some planks
to patch up the damage.

On the next day, following the decree, I went there to burn some ghost money and
mended the coffin. An odd wind swirled the ashes away. On another day, by chance, I
passed that location again and heard the ghost howling behind me. It sounded like an owl. I
dared not to look back and rapidly, I ran away. Even now recalling it, I still feel a chill on my
back."

Not convinced at all, Mr. Hua retorted, with calmness, "I don’t believe this nonsense. Of
course, it’s natural that your servant supports your perspective by hook or crook. How can
one mouth compete with and out-speak four lips. Until I personally observe a ghost with my
own eyes, I will stand firm on my conviction."
"Don’t be so adamant and, if I may add, narrow-minded?" Mr. Lee courteously countered,
in a lighthearted way, with logic and rationale. "In the vast universe, there are many things
which are beyond our grasp and comprehension. If you were a judge, would you
eyewitness a homicide before you can accept the evidence and render a sentence? After
we die, we will all become ghosts. Would that be a little too late for you to change your
opinion?"

In traditional Chinese society, temples would supply rooms for travelers and visitors. They
only supplied vegetarian dishes and accepted “donation” instead of fees. With high integrity,
Mr. Shi was virtuous and courageous. Once, he and his friend visited and stayed in a
temple for a few days. At midnight; disturbed and awakened by an eerie chilly air, they
annoyingly observed that on the surface of the wall there were two lighted lanterns. With
close scrutiny, they recognized those were monster's eyes. Its face was as large as a desk.
His friend was trembling and flabbergasted. On the other hand, Mr. Shi was utterly
amused.

Unhurriedly getting off the bed, he properly dressed himself, remarking, with delight and
with curiosity, "What a bright idea! You solved my problem. I intended to read a few pages
of a book and was wondering where could I find a candle in such pitch-dark room? How
fortunate am I? You appeared at the nick of the time and provided the light."

He selected a book, turned his back toward that monster, and started reading it. Since
its appearance created no commotion, this otherworldly creature was a little bored. The two
lantern-like eyes gradually merged into the wall. The room became dark again. Without
hesitation, Mr. Shi politely tapped on and yelled at the wall asking the monster to come
back. There was no response.

A few days later, while he was still staying in the temple, he went to a rest room. A
young servant followed and held a lighted candle for him. The huge monster's face slowly
re-appeared from the ground, glancing and grinning at them. Amazed and horrified, the
servant unconsciously dropped the candle and fainted.

With perfect tranquility, Mr. Shi pretended to look around and carefully picked the candle up,
making a suggestion in murmur, "Well, I need your help to handle this candle. How
convenient of you to show up. You came at the right moment."

Then, without waiting for a response, he mindfully put it between the monster's eyes.
The
scene
was
absurd
and
hilarious.
With
dejection
mixed
with
humiliation,
this
cross-starred otherworldly creature was mystified and motionlessly looked up, attempting
to balance this lighted candle with some difficulties.