Chinese Ghost Fables 1 (8 page)

A student visited Peking which was the capital city, in order to attend the third National
Official's exam. All of the motels were occupied by candidates and their servants. He could
not acquire a room in the city and was forced to rent one in an obscure suburban area
nearby an ill-maintained temple. He had lived there quietly for over two weeks.

One night, he was disturbed and awakened by a mysterious voice coming from outside of
his room, "Sir, please wake up. I have to talk to you. I have lived here for over three
hundred years. When you first moved in, I thought you were a well-learned gentleman, like
most other candidates. Therefore, I allowed you to occupy this house alone without making
any issues. Latter on, as I was observing you going out to visit presumably your friends and
relatives, I considered them as normal social activities. However, a few days ago, by
chance, I surprisingly noticed that you were in deep intoxication, which raised my suspicion.
How could one be a gentleman if he don’t have enough willpower to keep himself away
from alcohol and be drunken by it? This afternoon, I overheard your conversation with a
monk, who resides across the street. Without any shame and embarrassment, you boasted
that you have been hanging around bars and teashops all those days. You are not worth of
my respect. I had treated you as a well-learned person, for your convenience, I had to
relocate my family elsewhere. Currently, we stay in that temple and under the Buddha's
altar, which is too small to accommodate us all. Our living condition is unbearable. Since
you are only a hyprocate, I must demand that you move out of this room no later than
tomorrow morning. We already collected some shingles and stones for you if you dare to
remain here for another moment."

Mr. Don once visited the capital city of Peking. In order to save money, he shared a
room with an acquaintance. Infrequently studying books, his roommate often attended
parties and hardly stayed in the room for the night. Mr. Don slept alone. He overheard and
observed a stranger, or rather a dark creature that was scrutinizing his knickknacks, books,
stationeries, and paintings. Before coming to Peking, he learned that many of the old
houses were possessed. Reckoning it must be a fox spirit, he knew it couldn’t harm him,
after all he was an upright gentleman, and he decided to ignore its preying behavior.

On another day, he intentionally put his half-finished poetry on the desk. At midnight,
he vaguely heard someone whom was reading his poems in a murmur. He initiated a
conversation and received silence in response. The next morning, he discovered that some
of his poems were marked with comments. Strangely enough, when his roommate stayed
in the room, the fox spirit never showed up. In traditional Chinese society, people respected
high-ranking government officials and well-educated gentlemen. They had been stars
descending to the mundane world in order to assist the emperor in managing the country.
Blessed by the Almighty, they would be avoided by all otherworldly creatures.

Mystified and perplexed by this, Mr. Don revealed this oddity to his roommate. He was
so pleased that he thought himself blessed, like other high-ranking government officials.
Due to his lofty status, the low-life otherworldly creatures, which of course included that
humble fox spirit, dare not to appear themselves in front of him. With arrogance and
exaggerations, he always boasted this to his friends and acquaintances during all social
occasions.

One day, Mr. Don and his roommate invited their mutual friend, Mr. Lee, to a dinner.
Hours later, they were intoxicated and fell into deep sleep. At midnight, Mr. Lee woke up
and took a walk in the backyard garden. He vaguely noticed two people, an old man and a
teenager, standing under an aged pagoda tree. In such a cold weather, nobody would
linger outdoor. Believing that they were fox spirits, he cautiously concealed himself behind
a nearby tree and cautiously listened.
"Oh! It's freezing out here," The youngster moaned and complained, rubbing his palms in
zeal, "Could we go back to the room, now?"

"I am afraid not. Be patient for a litter longer," The old man consoled, "Mr. Don’s energy is
all right. But his roommate’s energy is so noxious that I can't allow you to stay anywhere
near him. His mediocrity will have a negative impact to you. It's intolerable. What walking
human garbage he is! I would rather sit here with chilly wind and frosty snowflakes than
share a space with that good-for-nothing."

Mr. Lee divulged this amusing dialogue to his friends. They rapidly spread it to their social
groups. Eventually learning this, Mr. Don's roommate was utterly embarrassed and
humiliated. He promptly relocated himself elsewhere.

Nothing is free. Fortune will not drop into one's lap without a reason. Merits and
reputation are earned, not given, in the same way, shame and disgrace can occur. Without
laborious study for years, how could this roommate naively expected to receive such a
blessing from the Almighty?
34
A HAUNTED HOUSE

In
traditional Chinese society, education was highly valued and people believed that
a well-educated person would be respected even by otherworldly creatures. In Zon County,
there was a haunted house. An educated old man and his friends voluntarily lived there.
Due to their presentation, they hoped that those dark creatures would humbly and timidly
relocate themselves elsewhere. One night, the old man overheard some unusual noises.

How could those lowlives dare to appear in front of the highly educated? What a rude
breach of protocol. He thought.
With indignation and aggravation, he promptly reprimanded and proclaimed, in a loud bass
tone, "It’s the rudimentary truth that the wicked could never overpower the upright. I have
taught theology for over thirty years. How dare of you to disturb me, such an ethical and
well-polished gentleman?"

From outside of the paper windows, a female voice retorted, in mockery and derision, "Big
deal! I know your academic background. Being a non-human, I have read extensively in
various subjects and do understand some philosophy, too. In my opinion, one of the most
fundamental qualities for a genuine scholar is to be faithful to himself. A person in faith is a
person in peace. Your behavior is totally opposite. Not really comprehending the true
meaning of those books, you have dogmatically mimicked the classical volumes. Is this for
your gentility or merely for a vague fame? You did write a few books but they did not show
any trace of originality. Worse than that, in most cases, you don’t even have your opinion at
all. Confronted with unconventional views or controversial issues, you often provide
conclusions without reasoning. Nobody knows your step-by-step logical mental process.
You are both short-sighted and narrow-minded. Your over-enthusiasm on persuading fame
and popularity indirectly hinder your ability of discovering the eternal truth of wisdom. How
knowledgeable could you really be if you can't even control your mundane human desire
for vanity? I am not questioning your personal inclinations. You should honestly scrutinize
yourself first before you make another haste response to my assessment. You can judge a
person by his deed not by his fame. Having a loud voice and bad mouth are ineffective.
They merely disclose your diffidence."
Sweating all over his body, the old man was dumbfounded, shamefaced, and couldn't utter
a word.
The female fox spirit beamed a smile and remarked, "Your speechlessness proves that you
still have a shred of self-consciousness left. I will leave you in peace tonight. Please move
out of this house first thing tomorrow morning. Farewell!"

A person, who attempts to hoodwink those otherworldly creatures or even, the
Almighty, is eventually making a fool out of himself. A hypocrite can dupe his peers but his
duplicity will be noticed and reckoned with by otherworldly creatures. Be truthful to yourself.
35
INFLECT SOME FLESH WOUNDS

In the western side of the city of Peking, a warehouse's attic was possessed and
occupied by a group of fox spirits. At midnight, the night watchmen would often hear
strange noises from there. However, since those otherworldly creatures didn’t attack
bystanders with shingles and stones, nobody bothered to evict them. They had peacefully
co-existed with human beings for many years. One day, a boisterous sound of scold mixed
with quarrel and screaming came from that attic. Out of curiosity, neighbors approached
the warehouse and cautiously listened.

Suddenly, they heard a voice complaining. "Gentlemen downstairs, have you ever seen a
wife hitting her husband so mercilessly? She physically abuses me and my body is in
bruises."

One bystander, whose face still showed fresh wounds and fingernail traces, abruptly
shouted back, "Of course. That's no big deal. Last night, I was disciplined by my dearest
other half, too." Hearing this humorous response, the female fox burst into roars of laughter,
stopped the thrashing. She led her husband away. All the turbulence was quiet down.

Regarding to this amusing episode, a wise man commented that the female fox spirit
could laugh this off and leave. That meant that she still loves her husband. She inflicted
some flesh wounds to reassure her authority but she wouldn't seriously hurt him.
36
A FORTUNE-TELLER

Mr. Lu is a well-known fortune-teller. Once, while traveling to the middle part of China,
he made an acquaintance with a gentleman on a boat. Strangely enough, Mr. Lu never saw
his friend sleep or eat. He suspected that he was an otherworldly creature who transferred
itself into human form. One night, out of curiosity, he point-blankly asked him whether he
was a ghost, a demon, or a fox spirit.

"None of those," His friend honestly responded, without hesitation, "To tell you the truth, I
am the patron God of Fortune. And I am on my way to visit the Southern Holy Mountain.
Fate made us meet. We are destined to spend a few days together in this small
compartment."

"If I may ask," With amazement and delight, Mr. Lu boldly requested, "I want to be a gifted
fortune-teller, who can accurately observe and foretell a person’s future. However, from
detecting various blessed signs in his countenance, I once told someone who would
become an important government official. Years later, he had still lingered on middle-level
positions, which is contradictory to my prediction. Am I losing my edges? I never made
such a huge mistake before. How could that be? Can you elucidate me?"

"Certainly," The gentleman pleasantly agreed and said. "Due to one’s effort, fortune may
change. Although he is fated to be a high-ranking government official, he inadvertently
hinder his own career by climbing too fast or too eagerly on his political ladders."

"What is wrong with the desire to win? Competition is the salient part of human nature. To
get
ahead
of
one's
peers
is
born
in
our
blood.
His
eagerness
for
promotion
is
understandable," More perplexed, Mr. Lu shook his head in disbelief and questioned,
"What's wrong with that? I really don’t get it."

"It all depends on his intention," The patron God of Fortune calmly elaborated. "A person
who is too smart might misuse his intelligence and do some foolish things. He thought he is
very clever and he thought that could explain away any misbehavior, which up to a point
might be true, in the mundane world. On the other hand, it is certainly unacceptable in our
domain. For a fast promotion, your friend is perfectly capable and willing to trade his
influences. By doing so, he deliberately and unscrupulously impedes his colleagues’ duly
progress for his own rapid political advancement. By using any methods to acquire, secure,
and defend his current position, he became cunning and ruthless. Power easily corrupts.
And crooks act in groups, like a pack of hungry and ferocious wolves. For their own
personal gain, they will stick together and swap favors among themselves, suspicious and
hostile toward others. Cronyism develops and the thin line divided between right and wrong
blurs. As a result of that vicious cycle, they will be downright hostile to outsiders. Where will
their unashamed ambition lead them to? The Almighty wouldn't allow it. That's why your
friend only got a middle-level position instead of much higher one. His own calculation and
selfishness undermined his promising career." The fortune-teller sighed profoundly and
thanked him for his piercing analysis.
37
MY FRAGILE COLLAR-BONES

An old tutor moved into a deserted house and used it as a lecture room. One day, at
midnight, he was disturbed and awakened by arguing noises that were coming from a
distance and outside of his windows. The argument was intensifying and aggravating into
quarrels, curses, and eventually, fighting. Since the backyard was rather remote and
isolated, he believed that they were some otherworldly creatures and he was horrified. The
commotion was moving toward his room and the content of their disagreement became
clearer.

"God damn it!" With indignation and resentment, a ghost, standing beside the paper
windows and seeking advice from this human being, loudly inquired. "He looks down on
and nitpicks at my poems. Are my literary works worthless? Sir, you are also educated.
Please be the judge for us and listen to my citation."

Without waiting for a reply from this flabbergasted human being, the impatient ghost,
with rhyme and rime, solemnly recited several poems. With contempt and derision, the
other ghost couldn’t withhold his emotion any longer and start giggling. The old tutor was
astounded and dared not to utter a word.

With great hesitation and uneasiness, the old tutor mumbled something inaudible for a
while. Sincerely and repeatedly bowing his bold head against the pillow, he timidly
answered, "I decline to comment because I'm afraid that my fragile collar-bones couldn't
resist your iron fists." The giggles were replaced by roars of laugher. He calmly vanished
into darkness. Cussing and coursing the humiliated ghost was annoyed and lingered on the
garden until dawn.