Chosen by Fate (23 page)

“I think it’s because you want what I’m offering. Because you know you deserve pleasure far more than you deserve pain.” He leaned in and kissed her neck. “I’m not leaving, Wraith. Not until I give you a taste of what you’ve been needing.”

She waited for him to do something like grab her jaw again. To show he was no longer afraid of touching her. To maybe even bite her. At the thought, Wraith barely failed to stifle the moan that rose in her throat. To do something like that, Caleb would have to be out of control, so taken over by lust that he didn’t even know what he was doing to fulfill it.

He wasn’t. And that was okay, too.

“I want to kiss you,” he said. “I want to taste you. Put my tongue in your mouth. In your cunt. But I can’t. Because I know that would hurt you. Even just a little bit. Right?”

Wraith swallowed hard.

“Right?”

She nodded and closed her eyes. “Right.”

“Have you ever been licked to orgasm?”

Her eyes flew open when it became apparent he actually wanted her to answer his question. His face was close to hers, so close that she could see the pores of his face. Heat suffused her.

“Answer me.”

“Yes.”

“Did it feel good?”

Had it? Somewhat. “It hurt more.” She said it as a challenge, lifting her chin defiantly, annoyed by all this talk and no action.

Instead of rising to the bait, he said, “I want to do it so bad, but tonight isn’t about pain. Any pain at all, remember? It’s only going to be about pleasure.”

She laughed. “You’ve got something up your sleeve, maybe? A dildo? ’Cause I gotta tell you, Caleb, I’m really not in the mood for—”

“Not a dildo. Fingers. Yours.”

Understanding washed over her. So she was right. He wasn’t offering her a miracle, but he was offering her relief. Relief while he watched? “No . . .”

“Yes,” he insisted. “I can feel your heat just standing here. You’re slick and hot, aren’t you? How much wetter—how much hotter would you get if I touched you?”

At his question, she imagined his fingers nestling into her folds. Imagined him inserting a long finger into her, then two, her inner muscles contracting around the stiff intruders, warm flesh and blood rather than plastic or glass. She groaned.

He lowered his head and blew against the tender curve of her shoulder. It made her reach to pull him down, closer, but he gently nudged her back with his body until the back of her knees hit the bed and she automatically sat down. Then he stepped back completely.

Without his heat to warm her, she crossed her arms around herself, hating the way her body instantly went cold. He moved away until the backs of his knees touched the small reading chair in the corner of her room. As Wraith watched, Caleb unbuttoned his pants and lowered his zipper, freeing his stiff member but immediately wrapping his fingers around it so she didn’t get a true sense of its appearance. But she’d felt it pressed against her more than once. It was hard and it was big and her mind plugged in the details while her mouth began to water.

He slowly lowered himself into the chair and began stroking himself in a strong, steady rhythm. His gaze never left hers. Slouching down, he rested his free hand behind his head and pinned her with smoldering eyes. “So we’ve established you use dildos to get off. It doesn’t hurt you?”

“N-no.”

“Do you masturbate?”

Wraith sat motionless, speechless, her gaze unable to move from the sight of him pleasuring himself. What had he asked her?

“Answer me. Do you touch yourself?”

Her face burned. She thought of all the times she’d touched herself since meeting him. Always in the dark. Always under the covers. Embarrassment made her want to turn and run. Instead, she merely shook her head.

He tsked. “Now, now, Wraith. I thought you were going to be honest with me. You’ve never taken your fingers and dipped them into your heat, working yourself toward pleasure in the privacy of your room?”

Wraith refused to answer. What did he want from her? To admit that no matter how many times she’d sought release, she could never fill the ache of loneliness inside her? She wouldn’t do that. Those moments were hers and hers alone. Even if they had always ended with ripples of pleasure that barely seemed worth the effort, there was no way she was going to reveal that to him.

“Well, I know one thing. You’ve never done it with me watching. That’s about to change. Touch yourself.”

Wraith knew he’d been leading up to this, but still, she inhaled sharply at his stark command. She shook her head, suddenly wondering if she could do this. Letting him touch her was one thing, regardless of the pain it came with. Letting him watch her while she . . . well, that was something altogether different.

“This is what I want, Wraith. It’s what you need. We’ll do it together and maybe this’ll help us get the edge off.” His voice was hypnotic. His offer both tempting and disconcerting. “Give us the push we need to find pleasure with someone else.”

Someone else? Realization covered her like a bucket of ice water, breaking the spell he’d cast over her. That’s what this was about. About him wanting to get over her and move on. Maybe he had the right idea. Maybe she should give him what he wanted. And get him the hell away from her. Because she couldn’t afford to care if he stayed or not. Not if she wanted to remain emotionally intact. Not if she wanted to find out what his death mark meant and retain the ability to walk away once she knew he was safe.

Biting her lip, she slowly moved her hand down her body. When she tentatively touched herself between her legs—just with the tips of her fingers—heat exploded inside her with the force of a firecracker. She whimpered.

“Good. Spread your legs apart.”

She moved as if she was in a trance, still refusing to look away from his stroking hand. He kept up his verbal assault, his deep voice vibrating into every nook and cranny of her body. He lifted his hand, sucked on his fingers, then wrapped them around his shaft once more. “I’m imagining your juices got my fingers wet. See how easily my hand is moving over myself? Feel how wet you are? Because I can see it for myself. On your pussy. Dripping onto your thighs.”

Wraith resisted closing her eyes as she moved several fingers over herself. He was right. She was so wet she was dripping. The sight of his hand moving over his cock combined with the husky darkness of his voice increased her pleasure tenfold. A low, jagged moan escaped, the sound so prolonged that it sounded like she was singing.

“Put your finger inside yourself.” Her eyes flew to his and her hand dropped away. She’d never done that before. Certainly not with anyone watching her. “No.”

“Now, Wraith.” His command brooked no resistance. “It won’t be as satisfying, not for either of us, but a finger fuck will have to do. Do it.”

Their gazes clashed for several long moments. He made no threat. No ultimatum. She knew he had chosen the raunchy words deliberately, to amp up her pleasure but also to remind her and himself that this was about sex, not more. She also knew if she continued to resist, he wouldn’t force her. He’d leave instead.

She didn’t want that. There was something about this human male. He got to her. More than any man ever had. He was light where she was dark, yet he still had darkness that called to her own and somehow seemed to bring out every traitorous softer emotion inside herself. She couldn’t afford to be soft.

She moved her hand back toward her groin. His voice stopped her.

“Wait.” Her hand froze at his words. “Lay on your side, prop yourself on your elbow and spread your legs apart.”

There was no resistance left in her. Slowly, she did as he commanded. She felt entranced by him, and maybe she was. His heated gaze and his continual masturbation made her feel sexy. Desirable. His fist was moving faster now. Twisting. Pausing at the top of his shaft to smooth his palm over the head of his penis.

“Wider. Good. Now do it. Put your finger inside yourself.”

Without taking her gaze from Caleb, Wraith obeyed him. “Oh . . . oh God,” she moaned, barely aware she was speaking. She closed her eyes and imagined it was his cock that impaled her. Without him directing her to, she began to move her finger in and out. She vaguely heard the sound of Caleb shouting out as he stroked himself to completion. She wanted that, too. Wanted to feel the waves of pleasure engulf her. She pushed another finger into herself and moved them faster. Her hips shot up, the sensation pushing her higher, higher still, until she felt like a rocket, hurtling toward space at dizzying speed.

“Wait . . .” She said it breathlessly. Desperately.

She paused. Was about to pull her fingers out of her body when he said, “No. Don’t you dare. Come on, Wraith. Let yourself go.”

She tossed her head. Could barely get her eyes open. “I can’t . . . Oh God it feels good, but . . . I . . . I . . . Oh God.” She was scared. Terrified. Her control was gone. Shattered.

He cursed softly, moved toward her, then fell to his knees. Hovering over her, he pressed his lips close to her ear and began talking. About what he wanted to do to her. How long. How often. How deep. In between the raunchy descriptions, he crooned, “That’s it. You can do it. Come on. Come on.”

Her thighs began to tremble as small spasms of pleasure overtook her. Still, she wasn’t quite there. Pressure climbed higher and higher. His mouth lingered next to her ear, his soft breaths caressing her lobe. His intent was silent, and though he was holding back, she knew what he was thinking.

“Do it,” she begged. “Bite me . . .”

He pulled back, just a little. “The pain. I promised—”

“I don’t care. Do it now, damn you!”

Instantly, he clamped his teeth around her earlobe, then sucked it into his mouth. That small pain coupled with the pleasure of her fingers sinking deep into her body pushed Wraith over the edge.

Wraith screamed as spasms of electricity worked their way mercilessly through her body. Her screams turned to moans. Then to gasps. Then for pleas of succor as Caleb continued to whisper in her ear. Finally, she fell back on the sheets, her limbs splaying out loosely.

Caleb rested his face on the bed beside her. They both breathed noisily in the silence of the room. Long moments passed, and Wraith blinked rapidly until the faint moisture in her eyes disappeared.

At that moment, he raised his head and looked at her. His piercing stare immediately had her on the defensive. “Well, that was a great effort, O’Flare. You . . . you almost proved your point. But in the end, it took pain to get me off. So what does that say about me now?”

The fire in his eyes immediately flashed out. He was quiet for a long time, then he straight-armed himself off the bed. He stood up, adjusted his pants, and slowly backed away. He moved for the door connecting their rooms, stopping before getting there. Over his shoulder, he said, “I guess it says I’m an idiot. Good night, Wraith.”

Wraith watched him go with a leaden feeling of loss. She curled into herself on top of the mattress, turning around so her back was to the door. And even though she didn’t allow herself to cry, she wanted to.

C
aleb made sure he kept the door to their adjoining rooms open. Folding the pillow under his head, he stared up at the ceiling, listening to the sounds of Wraith tinkering around in her own room. At one point, he thought he heard the whisper of fabric against her skin as she undressed. Tension filled his chest. Ignoring it, he turned on his side, flipping the blanket over his head. He couldn’t block out the sight of her playing with herself and giving herself pleasure. It had blown his mind, filled him with a sense of satisfaction, even as he’d been tormented by the knowledge that while she could have pleasure, he could never be the one to truly give it to her.

And then she’d dismissed it all. The pleasure she’d given herself. The pleasure he’d helped give her in the end. Hell, she’d dismissed him.

So he’d spoken the truth to her. He really had been an idiot, but all that was going to change. Tomorrow, things would be different.
He’d
be different. He just prayed sleep would come quickly.

A few hours later, he was dreaming of going down on Wraith while she moaned. But they weren’t moans of pleasure. Far from it. She sounded scared. Jesus, didn’t she know he would never hurt her?

The moaning got louder, jerking Caleb out of his dream so that for a moment he was disoriented. He wondered why he was sleeping in a strange hotel room with a straining erection. Just as he remembered where he was, Wraith screamed like someone had plunged a knife into her heart.

He jumped out of bed only to find the adjoining room closed and locked. He heard her scream again. Shit.

“Wraith!”

He pushed his shoulder against the door. Once. Twice. The third time he felt the door cave in against his weight. He expected the lights to be on and to see her struggling with someone or something. Instead, in the darkness of her bedroom, he could see her thrashing around on her bed, shaking her head and holding out her arms as if to ward off an oncoming threat.

Her eyes were closed and she actually looked asleep.

What the hell?

He raced to her bed, sat down, and grabbed her by the arms, wincing when she automatically tried to draw back. “Wake up. Wraith. Wake up! Now.”

She fought him in her sleep. Reached out and slammed him in the head repeatedly with her clenched fists. God, she was strong. His ears rang and he felt a warm trickle on his face. She’d bloodied his nose.

Caleb grabbed her pummeling fists and pinned them to the bed, trying to get control of her struggling body. She kicked out, almost kneeing him in the nuts. He finally had to resort to lying fully on top of her, pinning her hands to her side, and squashing her into the mattress. He put his face close to her ear.

“Shhh. Wraith.” He spoke firmly but softly. Trying to comfort her and pull her from sleep at the same time. “Wake up. You need to wake up.”