Class

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Authors: Jilly Cooper

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BOOK: Class
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About the Book

The English have been and always will be obsessed by class, even though they may not realise it. And Jilly Cooper has put an accurate, acerbic, and wickedly funny finger on the idiosyncracies of the English at home, whether it be in their castles, their nice villas in Weybridge, or in their high rise council flats. In Class we study the peculiar habits and mores of all classes - at play, at school, at work, during courtship and marriage rituals, even the way they dress, eat, and conduct their sex lives.

Here we have Harry and Caroline Stow-Crat who love their dogs more than each other, Gideon and Samanatha Upward who drink too much and are always in respectable middle-class debt, and here, too, are the wonderful Nouveau Richards, whose luxury homes are in execrable taste but blissfully comfortable with chandeliers in the loo.

Jilly Cooper

 

Class

 

A view from middle England
with drawings by
TIMOTHY JAQUES

 

This eBook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.

Epub ISBN: 9781409032007

Version 1.0

www.randomhouse.co.uk

  

CLASS

A CORGI BOOK : 978 0 552 14662 3

Originally published in Great Britain by Eyre Methuen Ltd

printing history

Eyre Methuen edition published 1979

Corgi revised edition published 1980

Mandarin edition published 1993

Corgi edition published 1999

7 9 10 8 6

Copyright © Jilly Cooper 1979, 1990, 1999

Illustrations and captions copyright © Timothy Jaques 1979, 1980

The right of Jilly Cooper to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright Designs and Patents Act 1988.

Condition of Sale

This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

Set in 10/11pt Century Schoolbook.

Corgi Books are published by Transworld Publishers,
61–63 Uxbridge Road, London W5 5SA,
a division of The Random House Group Ltd.

Addresses for Random House Group Ltd companies outside the UK can be found at:
www.randomhouse.co.uk

The Random House Group Limited Reg. No. 954009

CONTENTS

Acknowledgements

Dramatis Personae

Introduction

One:
The Classes

Two:
Children

Three:
The Nanny

Four:
Education

Five:
University

Six:
Work

Seven:
Sex and Marriage

Eight:
Homosexuality

Nine:
Houses

Ten:
Geography

Eleven:
Gardens

Twelve:
Food

Thirteen:
Drink

Fourteen:
Appearance

Fifteen:
Voices

Sixteen:
The Arts

Seventeen:
Television

Eighteen:
World of Sport

Nineteen:
Dogs

Twenty:
Clubs

Twenty-One:
The Services

Twenty-Two:
Religion

Twenty-Three:
Death

About the Author

Jilly Cooper is a journalist, writer and media superstar. The author of many number one bestselling novels, she lives in Gloucestershire with her husband Leo, her rescue greyhound Feather and her black cat Feral.

She was appointed OBE in 2004 for services to literature, and in 2009 was awarded an honorary Doctorate of Letters by the University of Gloucestershire for her contribution to literature and services to the County.

Find out more about Jilly Cooper at her website
www.jillycooper.co.uk

 

By Jilly Cooper

FICTION

RIDERS

RIVALS

POLO

THE MAN WHO MADE HUSBANDS JEALOUS

APPASSIONATA

SCORE!

PANDORA

WICKED!

JUMP!

NON-FICTION

ANIMALS IN WAR

CLASS

HOW TO SURVIVE CHRISTMAS

HOTFOOT TO ZABRISKIE POINT
(with Patrick Lichfield)

INTELLIGENT AND LOYAL

JOLLY MARSUPIAL

JOLLY SUPER

JOLLY SUPERLATIVE

JOLLY SUPER TOO

SUPER COOPER

SUPER JILLY

SUPER MEN AND SUPER WOMEN

THE COMMON YEARS

TURN RIGHT AT THE SPOTTED DOG

WORK AND WEDLOCK

ANGELS RUSH IN

ARAMINTA’S WEDDING

CHILDREN’S BOOKS

LITTLE MABEL

LITTLE MABEL’S GREAT ESCAPE

LITTLE MABEL SAVES THE DAY

LITTLE MABEL WINS

ROMANCE

BELLA

EMILY

HARRIET

IMOGEN

LISA
&
CO

OCTAVIA

PRUDENCE

ANTHOLOGIES

THE BRITISH IN LOVE

VIOLETS AND VINEGAR

My husband, a publisher, claims that it is excruciatingly bad form to dedicate a book to one’s publisher. It is therefore entirely in character for me to dedicate this book to my publisher, Geoffrey Strachan, with love and gratitude.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I am extremely grateful to the people who have helped me with this book. They include Andrew Batute, formerly manager of the French Revolution Restaurant in London, John Challis, formerly manager of Lloyds Bank, Sloane Square, Michael Davey, funeral director, Mathias of Putney, Brian Edgington, headmaster of Roehampton Church School, Brian Holley, divisional careers officer of ILEA (Putney), Heather Jenner, Auriol Murray, of Nannies (Kensington), Renate Olins, of the Marriage Guidance Council, Charles Plouviez, chairman of Everetts Advertising.

I also owe an eternal debt to my friends, who have entered into the spirit of things, and come up with numerous suggestions, some serious, some less so. They include Brinsley Black, John Braine, Lucinda Bredin, Christopher Brown, Madeleine Carritt, Tony Carritt, Camilla Dempster, Val ffrench-Blake, Jonathan Gathorne-Hardy, Bertie Gratton-Belew, Caroline Gray, Laura Hesketh, George Humphreys, Sophie Irvin, Jennifer Justice, Susan Kyle, Ronald and Sylvia Lewin, Miles and Juliet McNair, Nicholas Monson, John Parvin, Humphrey Pullar, Elizabeth Steel, Michael Stourton, Antonia Thynne, Guelda Waller, Alexander Weymouth, David Wright, Michael Ward, and Caroline Yardley.

Five other people made it possible for me to complete the book. I would therefore particularly like to thank my agent, George Greenfield, who has always shown such enthusiasm for the project, Beryl Hill, who typed out the manuscript and who miraculously managed to decipher my appalling hand-writing, and my resident major domo, Maxine Green, who retyped chunks of the manuscript when I couldn’t read my own corrections and kept up my spirits throughout those dark, desperate weeks, before the book was finally handed in and Tom Hartman and Alan Earney, who helped so much with the editing. The lion’s share of my gratitude, however, must go to my publisher, Geoffrey Strachan, who has been amazingly kind, patient, and encouraging over a long long period, when he must have despaired that the manuscript would ever see the light of day, and finally to my husband, Leo, whose humour and powers of observation have been a constant source of inspiration, and who remained good tempered, even when the whole house, including our bedroom, disappeared under a sea of papers and reference books.

Putney 1979

DRAMATIS PERSONAE

The people you will meet in this book are:

HARRY STOW-CRAT
, a member of the aristocracy

CAROLINE STOW-CRAT
, his wife

GEORGIE STOW-CRAT
, his son

FIONA STOW-CRAT
, his daughter and numerous other children, both regularly and irregularly conceived

SNIPE
, a black Labrador

GIDEON UPWARD
, a member of the upper middle classes

SAMANTHA UPWARD
, his wife

ZACHARIAS UPWARD
, his son

THALIA UPWARD
, his daughter

COLONEL UPWARD
, Gideon’s father

MRS UPWARD
, Gideon’s mother

HOWARD WEYBRIDGE
, a member of the middle middle classes

EILEEN WEYBRIDGE
, his wife

BRYAN TEALE
, a member of the lower middle classes

JEN TEALE
, his wife

WAYNE TEALE
, his son

CHRISTINE TEALE
, his daughter

MR DEFINITELY-DISGUSTING
, a member of the working classes

MRS DEFINITELY-DISGUSTING
, his wife

DIVE DEFINITELY-DISGUSTING
, his son

SHARON DEFINITELY-DISGUSTING
, his daughter and numerous other children

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