Collared (Going to the Dogs) (24 page)

She pushed down as hard as she could, grinding on him, glorying in the long groan of satisfaction she wrenched from him as she clamped her still-trembling muscles tightly around him and rode him until every last flicker of need was satisfied to the max.

She held onto to him when it was over, and he hung on to her just as tightly, clasping her to him, reclining fully against his broad chest, her fingers tunneling into his hair. She wanted every inch of her against him. Their breaths came in heavy pants, and she slowly became aware that she was damp and sweaty. The air inside the box had grown humid with their body heat. She half expected a sarcastic response from Caleb, something grumpy to take the wildness they’d just experienced into a much lighter place. It was always like this. So, it shouldn’t have been shocking or felt like anything other than what it was. Of course, the risk certainly heightened their sensations, but that didn’t explain the burning sensation that gathered behind her tightly-squeezed eyelids. Or her reluctance to let him go, to look him in the eye and once again force herself to put this—whatever the hell it was with him—back into some kind of contained, heart-proof box.

And he wasn’t his usual, irascible self, either. He held on to her, his face buried in her hair, as if he wasn’t ready to let go, either.
He’s trying to catch his breath, that’s all.
Not that it mattered. She willed herself to move, to gather herself and not lean on his shoulder. But at the first hint of movement on her part, his arm tightened around her, his fingertips dug more deeply into her hair. So she did what felt natural and right. Tenderness welled inside her, blindsiding her from some well deep inside her. That place where she kept everything locked up tight so that she didn’t lose herself to anyone. But, Caleb had found the hidden key and her heart sprang open, aching and beating in time to his. She kissed him, softly, sweetly against his temple and he pressed his head against her mouth, kissing her hair. She kissed him again, drawing her mouth closer to the hard edge of his silky jaw, before nuzzling against his cheek, until he turned his face and met her lips with his own. They kissed, softly, silently, reverently. Every moment of which quenched her thirst for him in a way that the most fierce, rocking orgasms could never hope to match.

“Damn.”

Harper startled at the sound of his voice, raspy and sounding gruff. She did move then, but he captured her face between his palms before she could slide completely off his lap. His expression was as somber as she’d ever seen it, his gaze holding on to hers so raptly that it was as physical a connection as the kisses they’d just shared.

The dazed quiet between them deepened, the power and essence of which she saw reflected in his gaze as well. It was both a relief—to know she wasn’t alone in spinning from the significance of what had just happened, even if she couldn’t define it—and a risk to what small shred of self she still retained. She had no idea what would happen now, what meaning he might draw from this, or what actions it might motivate him to take, the breadth and depth of which both alarmed and thrilled her.

He said nothing, just held her gaze for the longest moment. Then he took her hand and pulled it up to his mouth. He closed his eyes and kissed the center of her palm, his intense face dissolving into such a tender look her heart clenched. He wrapped his hand around hers as he looked up into her eyes, his own an almost impossible chocolate brown now through the thick fringe of his black lashes. “I want to hold onto what I see in your eyes, Harper.”

She was overcome teetering between fear and giving into the need to take his hand and press her own kiss to his palm in that same promise, make the same vow. Startled by how strong the impulse was to lock herself to him in such a profound way but, finally…she couldn’t. There was so much between them, but even more still left unsaid. And if she couldn’t tell him what weighed heavily on her, then she had no business making oaths. Of any kind. And yet she curled her fingers around his hand. It was as much of a pledge as she could make. That she did, indeed, want what he wanted. She just had no idea how to go about taking the next step toward it. Not without putting at risk the trust that had already been bestowed on her, the vow she’d made to Jeffrey first.

When they were almost to the limo, Caleb said, “How about I take you to dinner? A real date?”

“I’d like that a lot,” she said.

When they got inside, he directed Jeffrey to a restaurant not far from the Stadium.

“Mama’s Place.” The sign above the small eatery was blue and yellow neon. Looked like a quaint family restaurant. “This looks good and I love Italian food.”

“Good, because you’ll want seconds here.”

She realized just a moment before they entered that this had to be… As soon a tall dark-haired woman saw him she squealed. “My baby boy!”

She practically ran across the room and threw her arms around him. “Caleb,” she scolded, “It’s been much too long.”

Oh, God, this was his mother. The restaurant. This was their place. She was so touched, and she felt as overwhelmed as he’d looked when she’d told him he could sit in the dugout.

“Who’s this pretty
ragazza
?

“I’m Harper Sinclair.” She looked at Caleb. “I’m dating your son.”

“Oh, Timmy,” she called as people around them just kept eating, as if family drama was a normal occurrence in this establishment…or it could just be that the food was that good.

“Come over here to our special family table,” she said as a tall, handsome man emerged from the kitchen. It had to be his father, and she could see where Caleb got his good looks.

“Timmy, this is Harper Sinclair. She’s dating Caleb.”

He stuck out his hand and shot his son a way-to-go look.

Before she knew it, she was sitting down with a menu in her hands. Mr. and Mrs. Shaw joined them, and she learned a lot about Caleb’s childhood. Really good stories.

“No wonder you said you got your ears boxed.”

He chuckled.

“Hey, if it isn’t New York’s finest!” A male voice said from the door. When she looked over, three men walked over, two of them obviously twins and related to Caleb, and the third man was black. Two of them were obviously Caleb’s brothers. A double whammy, both good-looking. His other brother was devastatingly handsome, as well.

They all converged on the table and slapped Caleb on the back, glancing at her and waiting for an introduction.

“Harper, these are my brothers. Hudson, Hunter and Noah Shaw.”

Noah grinned at her. “I bet he told you there was a black sheep in the family…I’m not it.”

She laughed.

“That would be me,” Hudson said, “I’m the turncoat firefighter.”

“So, I take it you were adopted.”

“Damn, she’s too smart for you, Caleb,” Noah said, smiling again.

“And sassy,” Caleb said.

The brothers joined them, and his father went for more Chianti and then started them all singing,
That’s Amore
. Harper was laughing so hard missed the sound of her cell the first time.

She pressed the phone to her ear and plugged her other one. She said, “Hello,” hoping she could hear the person on the other end of the line.

“Harper, it’s Faith.” Faith sounded upset, worried and on the verge of tears.

“Faith, what’s the matter?”

“It’s Aiden. He’s been gone for two days. I don’t know where he went and he’s not answering his cell. He didn’t take Cleatis with him. He’s all alone.”

“Did he leave you any kind of note? Any indication where he might have gone?” A flutter of alarm started in her middle and she shifted the phone.

“No. I’m so worried about him, Harper. If anything happens to him and I didn’t contact you sooner, I will never forgive myself.”

“Okay, let’s not jump to conclusions.”

Caleb saw the expression on her face and he stopped singing.

“He might have gone to the Hamptons. He finds comfort at the ocean. I will check there. It’s not far and if he’s not there, we’ll figure it out. I’ll call you as soon as I arrive.”

Harper rose and everyone stopped singing. “I’m sorry. I’ve got to go. It was so nice to meet you all.” Her stomach clenching, she rushed from the restaurant to the street. She was on the phone taking care of the plane.

“What’s wrong?” Caleb asked, grabbing her arm as Jeffrey opened the limo door.

“Aiden’s missing.” It hit her right then and there that the fear and worry over Aiden being in Afghanistan had never been released and she felt as if a ton of bricks had dropped on her. She covered her mouth. Breaking down in front of someone wasn’t her usual MO, but this was Caleb. The man who had soothed her when she’d lost it, tracked her down and forced her to listen to him when she was so sure he was a jerk.

He pulled her against him. “The best thing we can do right now is stay calm. That’s always the mantra. We don’t know anything at this point. When we find him, if you’re distraught, it’s only going to make him feel worse. So take a deep breath, sweetheart.”

She buried her face into his chest and shook, letting out a terrible, hard breath, her throat painfully tight. She looked up at him, so grateful he was there with her. Not a leaner by nature, she now knew without a doubt that she needed this man in so many ways…and the fear that triggered was almost debilitating. What if he betrayed her? What if he really was only interested in her money? How would she deal with that pain?

She pushed away and wiped at her tears. “You’re right.”

“I’m coming with you.”

“I can handle this.” She looked away in a vain effort to regroup.

“I know you can, but I want to help. Please let me in, Harper. I’m not going to tell anyone about this. I just don’t want you to have to handle this alone,” he said, never more sincere, real concern stamped on every inch of his handsome face.

Indecision warred inside her. Then she looked up into his eyes…and she let go just a little bit, then some more. “All right. I do need you.”

“I’m here.”

She nodded, slipping into the limo, and pressing the intercom to tell Jeffrey where they were going, and why it was urgent.

“I’m sorry our evening was cut short,” she said when she and Jeffrey had finished discussing the trip. “You have such a lovely family,” she added. “Thank you for sharing them with me.

He slipped his arm around her and pulled her close, kissing her temple. “Your brother is more important right now, Harper. There’s no need to apologize.”

“I want to introduce you to my father. Most likely you’ll meet Aiden tonight. He probably won’t be in the best frame of mind.”

“I don’t judge, princess and I’d be honored to meet your father.”

She sat up and pushed the intercom again. “Jeffrey, would you stop by the penthouse so we can get Blue and Quinn? They’ll be a great comfort to Aiden.”

An hour later, Caleb pulled up to the house in a rented car. Leaving the dogs for now, Harper bolted out as soon as it stopped. Rushing up to the door, she used her key to get inside.

“Aiden?” she called. There was no answer. The smell of alcohol was thick in the air. She almost started to cry again, but when she got into the living room, she found him on the couch passed out cold.

Caleb followed her in, and when he saw Aiden, he could tell the guy had been on a major bender. Alcohol bottles were sitting empty or half empty on the coffee table, the kitchen was trashed. It looked like he hadn’t moved from this spot in two days. At one point it looked like he’d been sick and hadn’t made it to the bathroom.

Harper covered her mouth and her eyes welled up again. “Aiden,” she said softly. “Oh, God.”

Caleb took off his sports jacket and rolled up his sleeves. “Harper.”

She didn’t respond. He gently clasped her shoulder. “Go make some coffee.”

She stared at him for a moment as if she didn’t see him. Then she complied.

Before he could do anything, there was a crash from the kitchen and he rushed in there. Her eyes were a wide, tortured blue.

The coffee carafe was splintered on the floor.

“This is my fault,” she whispered. “I set him off by seeing him, by pushing him before he was ready.”

He gathered her in his arms. “Harper, it’s not your fault. He probably was already heading down this road. He’s hit rock bottom, and, fortunately, there’s nowhere to go from here but up. First, we need to take care of him and get him sober again. Find out what we can do to help him after that.”

She nodded. “You’re right. I’m just so scared for him, Caleb. I thought that facing his deployment to Afghanistan was the worst of it. But then he got wounded and withdrawn. He hasn’t been my Aiden. Not the brother who left—and I want him back. I
so
want him back.”

“I know. But Harper, he needs our unquestioning help and support right now. Do you have a spare carafe?”

“Yes, we have several coffee makers here. I’ll take care of this mess. What about Aiden?”

“He’s about to get a trip to the shower. Get the coffee going and then we’ll get him upstairs.”

She nodded and he grabbed a broom while she made the coffee, sweeping the shards into the dustpan and dumping it into the trash.

They left the coffee brewing and went back into the living room. Caleb slipped his arms around Aiden, who didn’t move or wake up. He maneuvered him into a fireman’s carry. His shoulder twinged a bit, but he ignored it.

“Lead the way.”

Harper climbed the stairs and Caleb followed with her brother’s dead weight across his shoulders. This Marine had lost his way. He knew what it was like to feel lost, but he was sure it was nothing like what Aiden had gone through.

When they reached a bedroom, Harper led the way through into the bathroom. Caleb grunted as he lowered him slowly into the tub, clothes and all.

“Aiden,” he said, before giving him a shock with the cold water, he wanted to see if he could wake him just using his voice, but Aiden was still unconscious.

He turned on the tap and aimed the cold water right at Aiden’s face. He woke up gasping and spitting.

“What the fuck?!” His body twisted in the tub to get away from the freezing water.