Collared (Going to the Dogs) (26 page)

She didn’t want to be so immersed in her own responses and sensations that she lost contact with his. She wanted awareness—awareness of him—awareness of the infinite gentleness in his every touch, awareness of the things he did to make her feel utterly cherished.

Sliding her hand across his naked chest, she pressed him back, and he caught her head, holding her mouth against his as he yielded to the light pressure. He drew her with him, and his arms encased as her she straddled his hips.

His breath caught, his voice so gruff it was barely audible as he whispered against her mouth, “Princess—babe, not so fast.”

“Shh,” she murmured softly then, rising, she guided him into her.

She felt him react, his whole body tensing as she slowly settled her weight on him, and on a ragged intake of air, he tightened his arms around her, molding her tightly against him.

Aware of every breath, every heartbeat, and every move he made, Harper began to slowly work her spell, wanting to immerse him in a pleasure so intense it would swamp his senses. She didn’t care if she experienced the same explosive release. That wasn’t important. What was important was to experience the full measure of his need, to be engulfed in his gentleness and caring, and to fill his needs, heart and soul. She wanted to experience only that.

Bracketing his face with her hands, she held his head still, his beard silky against her palms, the tips of his soft hair brushing the backs of her hands as she moved against him, her mouth teasing his with provoking lightness, his breathing suddenly uneven.

He whispered her name, locking her hips against his as he tried to still her movements, but Harper continued a subtle, tormenting rhythm. A low sound was dragged from him as he tried to twist his head free, but she held him, her kiss becoming more insistent as she wordlessly implored him to yield to her.

Hauling in a ragged breath, he dragged his hands up her back, releasing his hold on her hips, and she launched an assault on his senses as she settled deeper on him. A tremor coursed through him, and she felt him struggle against the need she was creating in him. Then when he finally surrendered to it, Harper experienced a rush of emotion so overwhelming that it left her unsteady, but she forced her body to continue loving him, moving against him, pushing him deeper and deeper into the sensations.

Wanting to give him all she had to give, Harper yielded her mouth fully to him, and he shuddered again and twisted beneath her, his words barely coherent as he ground out. “Harper—
fuck
—”

She rose, drawing him with her, and he went rigid beneath her, suspended at the very edge of release. Overwhelmed by all the feelings she had for him, she leaned back, giving him the full depth of her as he arched up, tremors coursing through him as he climaxed deep inside her.

Feeling overwhelmingly protective, she cradled his face against her shoulder, holding him with every ounce of tenderness she possessed as the aftermath left him shaking.

She held him like that for several moments, feeling so surrounded by him that it was almost as though he had drawn her inside his very soul. And she closed her eyes, soaking up the feeling of being
with
him. Only him.

Caleb stirred, his fingers tangling in her hair as he turned her head, then covered her mouth in a soft, lingering kiss. He heaved a sigh, then nestled her head against the curve of his neck, his tone heavily tinged with regret as he whispered unevenly, “I don’t like leaving you out like that.”

Cupping her hand against his jaw, a sudden rush of emotion catching in her throat, she said, “I don’t give a damn. Losing out on one or two orgasms isn’t going to matter. This time, I wanted to experience and give to you,” She whispered, kissing the curve of his shoulder. “I like the feeling of being connected to you.” She raised her head and brushed his mouth with a light kiss. “And, you know this, if I was feeling left out, you’d be the first to hear about it.”

He caught the back of her head as he returned the kiss, his mouth soft against hers. He exhaled slowly, his touch slow and soothing as he began stroking her back. Harper closed her eyes and relished the feel of his hand against her skin.

She wondered if he realized what a sensitive lover he was. Not only did he meet all her physical needs, he also met a need that in some ways was even more elemental. No matter how tired he’d been, he never rolled over and went to sleep afterward. Without fail, he always held her like he was holding her now, as though he too needed that moment of quiet physical closeness. And that closeness had become as important to her as the sexual gratification.

And still more barriers fell to him as she lay in his arms, more armor falling off her warrior’s soul. Maybe she’d been the warrior princess he’d named her. All she knew was that she seemed to be losing the last of her defenses against this man.

She was going to talk to Jeffrey when she got home. Maybe she could trust Caleb and still keep her promise to Jeffrey. Caleb was a dedicated cop, but he was also a reasonable man. Maybe after he heard her story, he would understand why she held back. Why she’d been reluctant to tell him. Because she’d been fooling herself. If she couldn’t let go and trust Caleb, what kind of a relationship could they really have? It still scared her, though, and she wanted to think about it just a little bit more, talk to Jeffrey and see what he wanted to do.

When they got downstairs, Aiden was gone. He’d left eggs, bacon and toast in the warmer with a note that said he was going to see Faith and to call him when she got back to the city. Harper was so glad he had worked that out.

“What did you say to my brother?”

“Only that he shouldn’t keep all this stuff bottled up. It was only hurting the people he loves and family was everything. Talk to his father and get it all out.”

She felt another welling of emotion that swamped her. Going to him, she smoothed her hands through his damp hair. “Thank you for making a difference.”

“It was for you, Harper. I couldn’t stand…I didn’t like to see you so upset. But I’m glad your brother is doing what is best for him. You can’t live your life for other people.”

“You are so right. Thank you so much for being there for me.” She paused and when he went to walk out the door, she put her hand on his arm. “Remember when you asked me to tell you something personal. Something no one else knows?”

“Yes, I do.”

“I’m not as strong as I pretend to be. Sometimes when I’m alone, I feel so scared. Despair grips me because I’m afraid I’ll never find the kind of love I want. And the reason I feel that way…is because I’m never really sure if the man I’m with sees me. Harper. Not the heiress, not the socialite who pulls strings for them, not that strong, calculating woman that knows how to find solutions to problems. Just me. The vulnerable core of me that is just like anyone else. Normal, completely open, and deserving of that love.”

“Would you freaking stop trying to be normal? It’s fucking boring.”

She laughed and he pulled her against him as they left the house.

After Caleb left the next morning, she went straight to Jeffrey and talked to him about revealing the information to Caleb about the kidnapping. Jeffrey agreed one hundred percent and he still refused to leave.

Then she’d picked up Aiden and they headed over to their family estate on Long Island. When her father came into the room, his eyes lit up at seeing Aiden standing next to her.

“Dad,” Aiden said, his voice carefully controlled.

His father took two strides and pulled him into a hard hug. “It’s good to see you, Son. So good. How are you doing, my boy?”

“Been through a rough patch, but I think I’m doing better.”

Her father let him go as he reached out and squeezed her arm. She smiled at him.

“Let’s go out to the patio. There’s an excellent breakfast out there.”

“Sounds good.”

After they were all seated, Harper just taking coffee, Aiden said, “I’m sorry I’ve been so absent from both your life and the business.”

“You sound like you’ve made a decision.”

“I have.”

“Tell me, my boy. Get it out and we’ll handle it. Together.”

Harper could see her brother struggle with his emotions. It was hard to watch, hard to see her strong, heroic, and amazing brother come to grips with the changes in his life, and she realized she loved him more now than ever. She reached out and covered his hand. “Tell him, Aiden.”

“The opportunities you’ve given me have been amazing. You’ve stood by me and supported me in all my decisions. This is a particularly hard one. I’ve fought against my own conscience, my family pride, my loyalty to you, and wrestled with all my demons…still wrestling with them.

He cleared his throat. “I know that you wanted me to take over when you retired. I know that you and I work so well together.” He dropped his eyes and took a deep breath. “Before Afghanistan, before the ambush, I was one hundred percent sure where my life was heading. I don’t regret serving my country. Not at all. I’m proud to be a Marine.

“But I also can’t overlook the fact that serving has changed me. Those moments when I didn’t know if Jared and I were going to make it shifted my perspective. I can’t go back to the person I was before that experience. I can only build on the guy I am now. Today. I’m not coming back, Dad. I need something different, something more…personal.”

Their father sat back, and rather than the disappointment Harper had expected to see, he looked proud, so proud of Aiden.

“As adults, Aiden, we have to make our own decisions. Decisions that affect the course of our lives. You are the master of your life, my son. You are smart enough, confident enough to make the right decision after weighing all your options. Soul-searching is, after all, good for the soul.” He smiled. “Of course I will miss us working together, but be assured that I completely support your choice.”

Aiden nodded, and swallowed hard. “It wasn’t easy for me, Dad.”

And then they all relaxed and Harper was glad to see Aiden eat as her father and Aiden talked about how they were going to handle transitioning the rest of Aiden’s responsibilities and titles to Mak.

Restless, Harper finally left the table and wandered through the house, noting that her childhood home hadn’t changed. She went into her father’s bedroom, and there were the pictures of her mother that he kept on every surface. He had loved her mother so much.
My dear, sweet dad.

Then Harper’s eyes fell on a picture she hadn’t seen before. She walked up to the dresser and picked up the frame, and her heart lurched.

She rushed out of the room and back to the patio. “Dad, who is this?”

He looked startled as she thrust the picture at him.

His face softened, his eyes going tender. “That’s Malia. I met her my junior year of college on a trip to Hawaii. She was a surfing instructor, and we had two months of complete and utter bliss. Then on the day I was going to propose to her, she disappeared. I tried to find her, but it was like she’d never existed.”

“What was her last name?”

“I don’t know. We didn’t seem to need a lot of conversation to communicate.”

As Harper looked at her father, at his eyes, her mind reeled. Eyes so like the ones she saw in the mirror every day, and…so like Mak’s.

“Oh. My. God.”

Aiden stood up. “Harper, what is it?”

“I think I know her last name.”

Her father looked back at the photo and he raised stricken eyes to her.

“No.”

“I think it’s Keao.”

“Damn,” Aiden said and her father just sat there looking at the woman’s beautiful face.

“Why would she do that? Why would she keep such a secret from me? All these years…I’ve never forgotten her.”

“I did something you’re not going to approve of.” The wonder and shock of the truth about Mak was still making her feel a bit dizzy. “I asked Caleb, the detective on my robbery case, to check his background.”

“Harper…” her father’s disapproval was in his voice. “I trust Mak. He’s more than proven his capability and dedication to the firm.”

“I know, but I’m not as trusting as you are. Mak’s birth certificate showed his father as ‘unknown,’ and his mother lives in New York City. She came with him when he was admitted to Columbia.”

“I suppose you also know where they live?” her father said with disapproval and hope thick in his voice.

“I do.”

Her father pushed back his chair and stood. “Let’s go find out the truth.”

When they got to Mak’s mother’s apartment, her father knocked. When the door opened, the woman on the other side gasped. “Oh, my God. Hal? Is that you?”

“Malia.” Her father’s voice was a mixture of joy and wonder. “You haven’t changed a bit.”

“Oh! Hal, yes I have you still just see me with your twenty year old eyes. I can’t tell you how happy I am you’re here. How did you… Where are …” She paused and visibly pulled herself together. “Please come in.”

They all sat down in her comfortable living room. She took her father’s hand, and Harper could tell that he was more upset than angry. “Mak? Tell me about him. He is a fine man. Is he mine?”

She closed her eyes and when she opened them they were filled with remorse. “Yes, he’s your son.”

“Why did you keep him from me?”

It was one thing to guess that Mak was related to them. It was another to know it. She had an older brother. A brother she barely knew. This was crazy and made her feel both a bit resentful that his mother had kept her from them and overjoyed that man she’d come to know as Mak was related to her. Family.

“I was a poor surfer girl and you were a very rich man’s son. When I found out I was pregnant and it was a boy, I got so scared. We’d never made a commitment to each other. I knew you were going back to school. I couldn’t risk telling you and having you take my baby.
Ohana
is everything. Please tell me you understand, Hal.

“I’m sorry that we were together for such a short period of time and you never really got to know me. I would never have that, Malia. But I understand your fear. Maybe back then, I wouldn’t have. I have two of my own and would fight for them fiercely,” he said as she looked over at them.